Disclaimer: I don't own Gakuen Alice and Natsume but I wish I do..I'd be soooo..sooo..happy if I did..unfortunately I don't! but..what the heck..let's just start with the fic..haha.. Reviews please!thank you!

Realizations

Things got worse for Natsume as time passed by, it was weeks, no months, no precisely TWO YEARS since he liked Mikan. Mikan of course learned the meaning of love and the one she liked was the famous Ruka Nogi.

Ruka was loved by almost every girl. "He's talented, smart, nice, and most importantly, I love him when he's so CALM, COOL AND COLLECTIVE" Mikan said in confidence talking to herself in her bedroom while spreading her arms and legs.

"What? Did I just say I love him when he's so CALM, COOL AND COLLECTIVE? But those traits are the same with that guy. Does that mean I like that guy too? Well, there's no shame, he's okay and he seems nice." Mikan admitted and blushed to herself.

"But still…I…" she was interrupted when his dad called her to go down to the car because they're going to the church already. "Coming dad! Oh, who cares, still Ruka Nogi's so perfect! It's obvious I like him more than that guy." she said walking down the stairs.

In their car her dad brought up the topic about Ruka. "So, you like that Ruka character, don't you?"

Mikan startled on how his dad knew immediately. Still, there's nothing to hide so she said, "Yes! He's just such a great guy!"

"Just be careful Mikan, guys may be as great as him but they could break your hearts. Listen; realize that there are others who love you. Many guys are there for you, and most of them seem determine, why don't you choose a guy that you surely won't be hurt. Someone who will love you unconditionally and will always be true to you." her father asked concerned.

"Dad, trust me, I can take care of myself, I'm not a girl anymore! I'm a teenager! I can take care of myself already okay? You have nothing to worry about me" she replies with a smirk on her face.

"I do trust you, I just don't want you to get hurt. I'm not pulling you down or saying that Ruka's a bad aleck or something like that, but remember you're my one and only daughter and I will not let you suffer."

"Oh dad! We're here! I've got to go now," Mikan said as she stood up and opened the car door.

"Mikan, promise me you'll take care" was the ending statement of her dad.

Mikan smiled as a sign of affirmation and ran off to the church happily thinking about a certain blonde lad named Ruka.

Months have passed and Natsume still like Mikan and Mikan still liked Ruka. But one day a tragedy happened. It was nothing like a big catastrophe or a calamity, it was just a misfortune that injured Mikan's heart, hypothetically of course.

Mikan heard from a lot of people that Ruka was crazy for a certain girl. But Mikan never believed the rumors, she always made sure of the facts or would go see for herself the truth. Because of her urge to know Ruka's feelings, Mikan saw Ruka with the girl he liked, she saw him admit to the girl that he likes her. The girl's face, her name or anything about her wasn't important to Mikan, what is significant to her now is that Ruka dumped her without her telling what she really feels.

Mikan was heartbroken and wanted to cry, but she tried not to even though it was hard. She just didn't want his dad to find out about the stuff that happened to her today. She didn't want to see him worry about her and reprimand it all on himself. It was her insist on to know the truth that caused this. She thought she shouldn't have looked for the truth, she should have just admired him and didn't doubt him. Now, she chose to be a martyr and keep it all to herself. But sooner or later she realized she needed someone to tell about it and the first person that popped into her head was no other than Natsume. "Yes! That boy! He's the same as Ruka, calm, cool and collective! Maybe he'll know what to do!" she optimistically thought.

The next Sunday, Mikan wanted to talk to the boy, Natsume but didn't have the bravery to do so. She was to some extent scared and nervous so she chose not to speak to him despite the fact that she really wanted to. She doesn't know why she felt worried that Natsume won't help her or reject her, in some reason, she thought of Natsume as an important person to her for the very first time.

Mikan's feelings toward Natsume continued to grow as every Sunday they see each other. She would stare at him and that gaze was even more than when she does it to Ruka before. Natsume was infront and she was at the back with her choirmates so she has no worry on Natsume seeing her, since ironically, he doesn't stare at her anymore. That was adverse for her. Still, she thought maybe he was just shy since if he did look back and stared at her, he'll be truly obvious. The choir changed their position to the top back previous to the side, in order to be heard all over the church. "That must be the reason! But what if the explanation is that he doesn't like me anymore? But why would he spend his time going to church here in a small village anyway?" she profoundly thought.

By that, she blamed herself for being so blind. Natsume was already there infront of her and he already liked her but she ignored him. It was unintentionally but it was a mistake, a very big mistake that she would never forget for the rest of her life because for Mikan, Natsume was a whole lot more than just a guy she sees every Sunday. "I think, I love him," she thought. "Why am I so blind! Why weren't I able to see his love for me before! It maybe too late! He might not like me anymore! A lot of girls might be asking him out now since he's a great guy. I'm such an idiot!" Mikan said in guilt, remorse and shame towards herself. She couldn't believe that the ONE for her has been right there all along. She didn't expect to love this guy, but she did, and now she might have lost him already.

She always prayed every day and night that Natsume still have even the slightest amount of crush on her so that she won't experience rejection for the second time around.

"Lord Jesus Christ,

I come to you as a humble servant. Please help me with my problem towards this guy. I've been blinded by problems and troubles in my life that I wasn't able to see the glory in my life. I didn't notice that the light for me, that would guide me always was just right there infront of my face. Forgive me if I didn't appreciate this gift of yours. Punish me if you wish. Just don't take him away because he's a very important person to me. He may be my significant other one day and my life might be meaningless if it'll be without him. So Lord God, understand that I will do anything to gain him back. I think I won't be able to survive without him. He's the person who I admire, like, adore and love O Lord so please have pity on me. Have sympathy on your creation that never appreciated this work of yours, your finest work for me. I say sorry for all the things that I've done harming you O Lord my only master. Look upon this person praying to you with all her meekness. May you grant this one and only wish of hers to be with this person she wants and needs in order to survive the obstacles of life. If you wish that he is not for me, I accept it wholeheartedly, but let me be able to tell him what I feel. Let me, by your word have courage and strength to tell my feelings to him. Let me, with your guidance and assistance tell me what I should do with this matter. This I ask to you O Lord Jesus Christ who lives and reigns in the Holy Spirit, One God forever and ever. Amen"

A/N: Reviews please! Hope you like it, I forgot to tell it's my first fic so be easy on me please!hehe..peace out! Gakuen Alice Rules!