I love you guys. Your reviews are really sweet and they make my day when I read them and make me try to do better so I don't let you down. Thank you.
Also I just went to see J Edgar and I saw a preview for this movie called The Vow – looks like it's about a couple who has to fall in love all over again because this woman can't remember five years of her life. I just want to assure you this is a co-incidence and that this story is not inspired by a crappy Channing Tatum movie ;)
Chapter Ten
It took three agonisingly long weeks until she finally had Lauren where she wanted her to be again. Lauren's polite and professional distance had sprung up between them immediately, as though they had never had that conversation about Nadia. It was almost enough to break Bo's heart all over again, but she kept telling herself that she had to be patient and work on chipping away at that cold exterior. It had always fooled people like Kenzi, but she had been able to see through it from the beginning.
Lauren was the kind of person who burned brighter than other people but kept it hidden, so you were lucky if you were the one who got to see it.
Bo gathered that Lauren had decided that she didn't want to see Bo outside of work, and so she resisted asking her to go anywhere. But now they were in a bar, only unfortunately they weren't alone. They were joined by Casey, Toby, and a couple of other doctors from the clinic. Toby had suggested after-work drinks for the whole team and Bo had been ecstatic when she'd realised Lauren were coming.
She sat on the edge of her seat, praying that each round of drinks they bought wouldn't be the one after which Lauren announced that she were going to go home. They were separated by a couple of people and Bo kept looking for an opening to go and sit next to her. When she returned from the bathroom and saw an empty seat she pounced, unfortunately placing herself between Lauren and Toby. He had been making clumsy passes at her all night and she kept seeing sympathetic eyes directed her way from the others, including Lauren. When she sat down next to Lauren she could feel Lauren's awareness of her, and noticed Lauren's eyes dart towards her and then away.
When he went up to the bar she leaned towards Lauren. "Do you think I should remind him of the sexual harassment policies he's supposed to be in charge of enforcing?" Bo joked.
On the outside she was trying to be confident and light; on the inside she was practically trembling with it. The feeling of being so close to Lauren. Images from their last true night together kept floating through her mind and coupled with Lauren's proximity to her right now, she felt downright intoxicated. Not to mention the fact that she had been pounding back the beer since they'd arrived in an effort to calm her nerves. At least she wasn't the only one. In overheard conversation she had started to notice a certain looseness in Lauren's tone that only appeared after several shots at The Dal.
Lauren patted her arm reassuringly for a second, and Bo breathed in and out slowly. Lauren had leaned closer to make herself heard over the conversation and music and her breath tickled Bo's ear. "Do you want me to say something to him?"
Bo gazed at her. It had always touched her how protective Lauren was. "Thank you for offering. I'll handle him."
Talking about Toby turned out to be the perfect ice breaker, because now Lauren was asking her about her week and how she'd been settling into her job. Bo subtly pulled her chair closer. As far as she was concerned there was nobody else in the room, and slowly she drew Lauren in until it really felt like it were just the two of them. Everyone else had peeled off into separate conversations.
"You know it would make me a lot better if you'd tell me a bit about yourself. I feel like I spilled everything to you when we had dinner," Lauren said and Bo shook her head in response. Lauren obviously felt embarrassed or exposed or something. And she supposed that she hadn't revealed anything about herself in return, so she could understand.
"I liked hearing about your life," she said honestly, stroking Lauren's knee quickly, taking pleasure in the way Lauren looked down at it, and not as though it were unwelcome. "There's really just not much that I can tell you. I haven't been in many relationships. Just not that good at them I guess." That at least was a fact.
"Oh come on, I don't believe in that. It's just about finding the right fit. And I'm sure that you'd have plenty of choices," Lauren said, pointing over Bo's shoulder and smiling. Bo looked backwards and saw Toby leering at her.
"Wow, thanks. But not really my type," Bo said, widening her eyes at the thought. Even if Lauren weren't around he would be right down the bottom of her list. She could be starving and she wouldn't give him a second look.
"Just kidding. But I have noticed that a lot of people stare at you. You're a very charismatic person. Must be nice to know you can have anyone you want."
"Apparently not anyone," Bo said suggestively. "I seem to remember you knocking me back for a date."
"Huh," Lauren said, suddenly finding her drink very interesting.
"I get it," Bo replied. "But if you ever change your mind . . ." she tried to sound teasing, so that Lauren could take it whichever way she wanted to. In reality she was getting hot as the conversation got more intimate - and she felt more free to flirt. She knew she were making Lauren nervous and it was more than a little bit fun.
Lauren hesitated, trying to decide on whether she should say what was on her mind. Dutch courage won out. "You know I haven't been with anyone but Nadia for ten years? Ten years. And for almost half of that time I might as well have been single. I feel like I wouldn't know what to do."
Bo bit her lip. Because she hadn't known about Nadia the first time they'd made love, she hadn't been aware of what that must have felt like for Lauren. That first time had been a little tentative, but she had thought that was mostly because of her. She'd chalked it up to first time jitters, and of course they had to be careful because she wasn't sure how much she could control her powers. Lauren had seemed so sure of herself - had known just how to touch her and how to drive her crazy - it was laughable that she could think that it might otherwise.
"I'm sure you would figure it out. Very fast," Bo said. Lauren laughed nervously, but her eyes were locked on Bo's in a very interesting way. Bo could feel the sexual tension rising between them like a tangible thing growing stronger.
The night wore on, and gradually everyone left until it was just the two of them. Soon the staff were turning on the lights and putting chairs up on tables.
"I should go try to find a cab," Lauren said, getting up from her chair, but she tripped a little as she moved. Bo put out a hand to steady her and let her fingers rest on Lauren's waist.
"If you want you could come stay at my place? We can split a cab. I'm sure I've got a bottle of wine at home. I'm not hitting on you I promise," Bo said, lying only a little bit and not caring that Lauren probably knew it.
"I'm in," Lauren agreed.
Bo woke up with the world's worst hangover. Her head was pounding and she initially had trouble opening her eyes, but she did in a hurry when she remembered who had passed out next to her on the bed. A smile spread across her face. They literally had fallen into bed with their clothes on and she felt like crap, but Lauren was beside her and that was all that mattered.
Bo rolled into her side and watched Lauren as she slept. The urge to reach out and touch her was overwhelming but she tried to content herself with just looking. Lauren's hair was fanned out around her face and Bo watched the delicate lines of her collarbone, the soft skin of her neck. Bo shifted uncomfortably on the bed; feeling the evidence of her own arousal. It had not been so long ago that they'd made love in this bed. Now she could smell Lauren's hair and skin, and that night was all that she could think about.
Bo had opened a bottle of wine as soon as they got in, relieved to find that Kenzi wasn't at home. She was a little drunk and keeping up the fiction of not knowing Lauren would only get harder with her around. They had sat on the couch getting closer and closer, and Bo had started pressing for more details about Nadia and how they'd met. There were things she'd always wanted to ask but couldn't when she had been working on being all respectful and mature.
At one point Lauren had put her head in her hands. "It's beginning to feel weird talking to you so much about this. I don't want to be that annoying person that sits around talking about their ex all of the time."
"Okay, okay, I'll stop," Bo had said, sitting up on her feet to face Lauren. "But you know what I think you need to do? You need to just get back on the horse. So as a friend, I'm going to dare you to kiss me so you can see that it's not so scary."
"Bo!" Lauren said, laughing.
"I'm only trying to help you," Bo said, tongue-in-cheek. "Just a little one?" There was no way she wanted to back down now. Lauren was staring at her lips, glancing between her eyes and mouth.
Suddenly she felt Lauren's strong hands reaching towards her, one on her face and one on her shoulder pulling her forward. Lauren paused for a moment, long enough for Bo to see that Lauren's eyes were heavy-lidded with desire.
It was like time had folded and they were back to where they had been before all of this happened. Back to when Lauren had made Bo feel like she were the most desirable, most important person Lauren knew. She stared back at Lauren, drunk all over again with the anticipation of it.
Lauren closed the space between them and touched her lips to Bo's, moving them against her and stroking her shoulder. Lauren grazed Bo's bottom lip with her teeth and Bo felt tingles everywhere, as she struggled for control against the feel of Lauren's soft wet mouth. When Lauren pulled away they were both reaching for breath, their foreheads leaning against one another's.
"There. Let it never be said I back out of a dare," Lauren said, raising her eyebrows. She pulled away and reached for her wine glass.
Lauren was beginning to stir, and Bo closed her eyes again needing a moment to pull herself together. She felt Lauren move to sit up in the bed beside her and she quickly re-opened them, not wanting Lauren to go anywhere. They had gone to bed not long after the kiss, and Bo had wanted to try for more but didn't want to push her luck. But Lauren's ice was melting – there was no doubt about that.
"Hey, do you feel like you were hit by a truck too?" Bo said lightly.
Lauren looked down at her and smiled. "Mmm hmmm." She rubbed her eyes and moved to get up, looking warily around the room. "Sorry for crashing, I should have gone home."
"Lauren," Bo said quickly, grabbing her arm. "No, it's cool."
"I should go," Lauren said, ignoring her. Bo felt crushed – she had just been envisioning them spending the morning together, maybe going out to get breakfast. She had thought she was finally getting somewhere.
"Wait, Lauren. Can we talk for a second?"
"Sure," Lauren agreed uncomfortably.
"I hope I'm not overstepping my bounds, but I think you're cool, and I really like you as a person. I'd like to hang out, no pressure for anything else," Bo said, hoping that being direct was the best way to go about this.
Lauren smiled seemingly in spite of herself, and then shook her head a little. She was picking invisible lint off the sheet next to her. "I like you too Bo. And I'm sorry for kissing you last night. It wasn't fair. I just don't want to give you the wrong impression about anything. You know my situation, you've heard about it enough," Lauren said, rolling her eyes self-deprecatingly.
"You mean I don't get to be the rebound girl?" Bo said, joking to hide her hurt feelings.
Lauren just shrugged helplessly, shaking her head. "Don't say that. We work together, and yeah I'm not in the greatest place right now."
"I hope you don't mind my saying, but you seem really lonely," Bo pointed out. She felt awful for saying it when she saw Lauren flinch, even if it were the truth.
"Well yeah – I let a lot of my friendships slide while I was away, and I'm in a new city, so yes . . ."
Bo finally sat up so that they could look one another in the eye. "So let me be your friend Lauren. I'm lonely too," she said honestly. It was a fact, and she was lonelier than she'd ever been to have Lauren so close and so far away at the same time. "You've made yourself clear, I get that you don't want anything more from me. So let's not just say we can be friends, let's actually be friends."
It was like she could literally see Lauren's guard coming down. "I'd like that."
Bo couldn't help herself, and she leaned forward and grabbed Lauren into a hug.
Lauren was stiff against her for a moment and then Bo felt her relax, softening a little to let Bo hold her. Bo smelled the familiar scent of her shampoo and felt Lauren's soft curves against her. She swallowed down the lump in her throat. She let Lauren go just when she sensed that it were about get be too uncomfortable.
"Great, well your first duty as a friend is to come and have breakfast with me."
Lauren smiled at her, in a way that made Bo know what they meant when they said your heart could skip a beat.