Jayne had a YouTube channel that she used to submit music videos, sing other peoples songs and talk about celebrity life. Arthur found himself sitting at his laptop with the headphones plugged in listening to Jayne Alvers criticize Miley Cyrus's attempt at hosting Saturday Night Live.
"Hey guys, its Trader Jayne here. As you know, last week I hosted Saturday Night Live. I thought it would fun to watch Miley Cyrus's sad attempt at hosting. I missed the episode on live TV because I fainted before it went on air and my dad ended up calling 911. True story."
Arthur didn't understand Hollywood catfights, nor did he want to. But the beef between Jayne and Miley had everyone watching.
"So I watched it. It starts out with a skit called, 'Duh, Winning' where Charlie Sheen has a talk show. Bill Hader plays Charlie and let me tell you, he is so funny. Miley comes on as Lindsey Lohan with a blonde wig and big bag. What's ironic is that Miley is doomed to become a shadow of Lohan. I once respected Lohan but I lost faith in her now. She's always get's in trouble."
The scratching of Ariadne's pencil echoed through the giant room. Eames raised his eyebrows in curiosity. What was she doing? He walked over to her work station.
"You haven't said a word since you came here darling." He cooed.
"I'm working." She told him firmly, not even nudging her eyes off the paper.
"Working awfully fast." He observed. "How can you draw that quickly and still make it look nice?"
"Eames, I'm trying to get my work done here. I have to make a concert hall, ok? So get a coffee or something."
"Bloody hell, what has your panties in a bunch?"
Ariadne dropped her pencil on the desk.
"If you must know, I have to leave early today to get a cavity removed." She didn't sound too thrilled. Eames sensed some anxiety in her voice. "So now you know. Please let me finish this assignment now."
Eames returned the other side of the room. His computer was on Ivory Maximoff's channel looking at a video called, "Who's Really Talented In Hollywood?" Never had Eames before seen a girl with white hair, but her father was Pietro Maximoff who was famous for his white hair. Eames assumed it was bleached but Ivory often insisted that her white locks were real.
"Hey chicks and dudes." She began. "A lot of people ask me what I think of other celebrities that I've met. Finally, I'm going to be honest. I'm going to tell you exactly how I feel about these actresses and singers. I say actresses because were only talking about girls here. Here we go; by popular demand, I'll talk about Miley Cyrus. For one, she disrespected Jayne Alvers who is my bitch, not hers, after being criticized. Miley cannot sing and she's strait up a hoe. Who smokes a bong and then says, 'It was legal'? Isn't she aware that little six year olds wear her face on their shoes? Once a Disney Channel star, you will always be viewed as a Disney starlet. Hilary Duff is married now but whenever I see her, I still think of Lizze McGuire."
Eames had no idea who Lizzie McGuire was but he let that slide. If he was going to forge into this pageant queen, he had to be very critical in front of Jayne and agree with everything she say's.
"So Miley sings in her monologue that she's not perfect. It seems as if she doesn't get it. We don't want you to be perfect Miley. We want you to set a good example. Annie Lebowitz may have failed to get you naked but you sure weren't afraid to take some risqué photos. In fact, let's see a couple." Jayne was not afraid to put repulsive pictures in her videos if she had to.
Arthur wanted to close his eyes in respect as a picture of Miley and another girl popped up. What was disgusting was that they were sharing candy with their mouths. Arthur wanted to exit the channel.
"Nasty!" Jayne exclaimed. "What the fuck is that anyway, one of those Jolly Ranchers?"
Arthur knew clearly that Jayne hated Mileys guts. He didn't need to look into that anymore. He had to focus on the more important points, like Jayne's relationship with her parents.
Lance Alvers and Kitty Pryde met in high school. Their relationship started out very rocky. Lance would always try to make a move on Kitty and she would always reject him. Eventually, she gave in and agreed to go out with him once.
And she had the best time.
Their romance strung like the tale of Romeo and Juliet. But they had different friends, different thoughts and sometimes fought over them but Lance loved Kitty too much to stay mad at her.
Kitty's parents did not approve of the relationship. They were especially angry after she got pregnant with Jayne. When Jayne was born, there were more fights. The couple was two strong to tear in half though, especially with Jayne's surprising strength. No matter what happened, Lance went to Kitty's bouts and Kitty went to his concerts.
That's what Arthur knew from headlines. It was time to throw out the magazines and do some hacking. There was little effort done as Arthur found himself in a three-way online chat room.
Aftershocker: When are you guys flying in?
He assumed that was Jayne and waited for a reply.
Cheetah Grrrrrl: I have a flight at noon tomorrow.
Commander Ember: I have my costume, it's so cute!
Aftershocker: You did get a charmander costume, right?
Commander Ember: Yep. You get bulbasaur?
Aftershocket: Yeah, it's a cute dress.
Cheetah Grrrrrl: My dress is really long…
Afterschocker: Dina wants to join you guys… Let's be nice to her for this one time.
Cheetah Grrrrrl: You gonna dress her up as Pikachu?
Aftershocker: Well we're all going as pokemon, so yeah.
Arthur exited out and browsed past chats. He found one Jayne sent to Ivory.
Aftershocker: I got the tattoo finally. It's really cool.
Cheetah Grrrrrl: The Earth tattoo?
Aftershocker: Yep.
Earth tattoo? Arthur went on Google and entered 'Jayne Alvers tattoo'. The results showed pictures of Jayne on the beach with a big black tattoo on her lower back that said, "Earth." Arthur looked at the font of the ink.
When he flipped the tattoo upside down, it looked exactly the same.
Just like the Illuminati symbol.
"This is far by the most interesting mark I've researched." Said Arthur.
"What did you see on her Facebook?" Ariadne asked, her back still to him.
"A couple of Miley Cyrus videos, thousands of pictures and many instant messaging conversations. And a tattoo."
"What tattoo?" Eames walked over to the laptop. "She has a tramp stamp?"
"It appears so." Said Arthur. "And she had it done a few days ago."
Ariadne's phone beeped and she got off the desk to grab her jacket.
"Where are you going?" Arthur asked.
"The dentist." Ariadne huffed. "I have to get a filling."
"Would you like company darling?" Eames offered. Ariadne shrugged.
"I guess the company would be nice." She said as she put on her jacket. "I'll see you guys tomorrow."
"Bye." Said Yusuf.
"Eames, when she's done, take her home and come back here." Said Arthur.
"Yes mum." Said Eames throwing on his coat. "Let's go darling."