Chapter Sixteen: Of Courage and Angles
"Hey Julie, look what they're doing to me
Trying to trip me up, trying to wear me down
Julie, I swear, it's so hard to bear it,
And I'd never make it through without you around."
- Foundations Of Wayne, Hey Julie.
Legolas was annoyed. Why was he annoyed, you ask? Take a wild stab in the dark. Yes, 20 Reader points to you! It was Elizabeth's doing. She seized the opportunity of the rubble on the ground and had quite taken to throwing inanimate objects at him and then pretending it wasn't her. Not that he was fooled, of course, he did his best to ignore her and hoped it would go away. So far, it hadn't worked. She continued to pester him for all she worth. It was like she concentrated all the energy she had and directed it onto him. For example:
"Legolas? Legolas, you can't keep ignoring me forever and ever."
"I believe I can." He said stiffly, already jittery from the stone confines of Moria.
"Ha! Got you to talk! I win!"
"I wasn't aware it was a competition."
"Anyway, I was just wondering-"
"Lady, excuse my manners, but you never simply wonder about things."
She sniffed. "I do so. I was wondering, why don't you have a girlfriend?"
"A what?"
"You know..." She whispered conspiratorially. "A ladyfriend...Even Gimli has one."
"In all due respect, I don't think that's any of your business."
She gasped. "You're in love with Aragorn, aren't you? How can you stand him being in love with another!" She then proceeded to cry dramatically and hug the startled Elf. The others watched on in bemusement, secretly glad it wasn't them.
The first day passed. Gimli and Frodo gave the impression they did not want to talk. Understandable, really. But they weren't much fun for Elizabeth. Aragorn stayed pretty much neutral in all affairs and had taken to having less facial expressions than Kristan Stewart. Also not fun. Legolas tried to be wherever she was not. Very not fun. She had decided to keep her distance from Gandalf; she didn't want to be hit in the face with a staff again. Yes, the first day passed. It was dull. The days and nights blurred into one and, before she knew it, Gandalf was sat staring intently at the three tunnels. "I have no memory of this place."
"Fantastic."
A faint noise in the tunnel behind them made Frodo turn, pale brow furrowed. "There's something down there." Normally, she would have made a sarcastic comment like, That's what she said, or You need a Legolas Label Maker. However, upon seeing the pallid complexion and tired eyes, she thought it best to hold back a little. "It is Gollum..."
I'm bored of this conversation. Hmmm...She made a point of coughing when the thick, nutty smoke from Aragorn's pipe wafted her way. Picking up the twig beside her, she drew in the dirt absent-mindedly, sketching a menagerie of animals, an approximation of a hairdryer and a Christmas tree. To make it seem extra-realistic, she added a tiny star on top of the tree. "Elizabeth?"
She stopped drawing her latest creation and looked up. "Boromir." She replied, in a mockingly serious tone, then adding an, "Oh."
"What is it?"
"Have you always been that tall?"
"I presume so."
"You look different from this angle." She said thoughtfully, uncrossing then recrossing her stiff legs. "But what did you want?"
"I think you may have dropped this." He extended an arm and on the open palm, was one of the buttons from her pirate-like shirt. The button appeared surprisingly small and fragile in his calloused hand. Glancing down she saw, indeed, that the last button on the material was missing.
"Oh, cheers." She said gratefully, taking it and slipping in into her pack. She went back to her 'modern art'. Boromir cleared his throat pointedly. She sighed and flicked her eyes back up. "Can I help you?"
"Lady Elizabeth, I mean no offence, but would you please consider being less... um..."
"Charming?"
"No, not that-"
"Gorgeous? Funny? Talented?"
His cheeks coloured slightly. "No, would you consider being less... juvenile?" She gave him 'The Look', which mainly involved maintaining the air of mental rejection and raising one eyebrow. He continued. "As vaguely entertaining as it is to watch you irritate our Elven associate, I fear it is taking the toll of his psyche."
She glanced over to where Legolas was standing. He was nervously pacing the perimeter of the group. She had never seen an Elf so on-edge. "But," She stated. "If I lay off one person, one other person gets double! Will that person be you?" He did look a little scared, but soldiered one, none the less. Taking on double Elizabeth was a truly courageous act.
"I am sure I will regret it in the future, I am willing to accept the consequences." He put on a smile.
"Wow." She said, nearly choking on her own saliva. "In my years of living, no one has ever volunteered for extra time with me." She grew excited. "Think of all the things I could do! Wait, can I do one last thing? Please?"
"Very well. Make it quick and painless."
"Not so sure about painless..." She muttered, before pretending to stand tall and to carry a bow and quiver. "Hey! Guys!" They turned. Her beloved Leggy-bear wore an expression of one who was unprepared for a tornado. "Look everyone! I'm being Legolas!" She pulled an imaginary arrow from her make-believe quiver and fired it at Merry, who promptly began to act out a death scene. "Hello, I'm Legolas. I like saying ominous things at random intervals, looking around rapidly and squinting."
Pippin was chortling with laughter. He was giggling so loudly, in a way that made her think he was attempting to keep quiet, that they missed Gandalf saying; "Ah! That is the way!" In turn, that made Gandalf wizard pointed to the right hand tunnel, only to realize that, still, no one was listening.
After a few minutes, in which she was still laughing, the fellowship assembled to traverse the passageway. Too late did Elizabeth recall that Merry had not spoken the 'He's remembered!' line.
Maybe screwing with Tolkien's world isn't such a good idea...Hahaha! Almost believed myself for a second. Wow, that never gets old. They passed under an arched doorway, into a black, empty space. Gandalf, even though roiled from Elizabeth's continuous shenanigans and capers, thought it not best to alienate her. These were dark times and they had to all stick together. Not in a High School Musical sort of way, more of an A-team sort of way. Yet again, I digress.
"Boromir?" Elizabeth asked sleepily. The days and nights had blurred together, making it difficult to know when they were meant to be sleeping.
"Yes?"
She tried to capture the essence of the conversation outside of the mines. "Have you ever had a dream so real, you thought it was actually happening?"
He nodded and took his shield off his back and onto the ground beside him. "Yes. Prophetic dreams are not rare in my family."
She explained, "I keep having these strange dreams. There's this woman and the sea. I remember that the woman wasn't even a woman, she looked more like angel than human."
Boromir mulled this over for a minute or so but when he turned back to speak his mind, he felt pressure on his leather clad shoulder. She was fast asleep. He shook his head and slowly lifted her off and onto her sleeping pack. Hands lingering a little longer than they should on her sleeping face. She didn't dream at all that night.