Chapter Twenty Three: Of Hair and Boats
"Remember, when the gods all stutter on your precious name.
You have the gift of humour;
no one who meets you will frown for very long,
or ever be the same."
- S. J. Tucker, In the House of Mama Dragon.
The time came when they had to leave Lothlorien. She had just been able to get used to getting up whenever she wanted and eating when it pleased her. She avoided Boromir as if he was the plague, the feeling of foreboding lingering in the air. Another thing that caught her interest was Aragorn. He had washed his hair. It was lovely. It actually moved independently from his head now.
As was custom for Elizabeth, she was half asleep when they were taken to meet with the Lord and Lady for the last time. Each member of the fellowship was gifted with a cloak. She was sure it would get muddy as soon as they left on the boats, but she accepted it gratefully and hoped for the best. "Never before have we clad strangers in the garb of our own people. May these cloaks help shield you from unfriendly eyes."
Galadriel moved down the line, presenting each of the fellowship with a gift of her choosing. "My gift for you, Legolas, is a bow of the Galadhrim. Worthy of the skill of our woodland kin." Legolas looked with wonder at the beautifully carved bow. Compensating for something, much?
Merry and Pippin unsheathed daggers she gave them. "These are the daggers of the Noldorin. They have already seen service in war. . Do not fear, young Peregrin Took. You will find your courage. And for you, Samwise Gamgee, Elven rope made of hithlain."
"Thank you, my lady. Have you run out of those nice, shiny daggers?" She smiled at him without responding.
"And what gift would a Dwarf ask of the Elves?"
"Nothing. Except to look upon the lady of the Galadhrim one last time, for she is more fair than all the jewels beneath the earth." Get your flirt on, Gimli! Elizabeth mentally cheered him on. Galadriel laughed and Gimli began to turn away, then hesitantly turned back. "Actually, there was one thing. No, no, I couldn't. It's quite impossible. Stupid to ask…"
Eventually, she gave him three golden hairs from her head. Anybody else think that's a LITTLE odd? Maybe he wants to make a wig out of it.
She gave Aragorn an Elfstone and Boromir received a golden belt. She smirked, disguising it with a stealthy cough. Boromir likes belts? In gold? How fashionable. He needs to, like, totes go to Topshop with me! Urgh, even in my head that voice sounded horrible. She shuddered.
At the end of the line stood Elizabeth. In all honesty, she didn't really expect a gift. The Lady had helped her enough. Yet here she was, Galadriel reaching out to touch her forehead. "The one who is lost." She smiled. "I have something you might find useful."
"Like rope?" Elizabeth said uncertainly.
Galadriel answered by pressing a small dagger into her palm and closing Elizabeth's hand around it. "We all have our paths in life to take. May the Valar have mercy. And, remember," She caught Elizabeth's eye. "We are all victims of our own actions. Namárië."
She opened her palm. It was more of a knife than a dagger. The blade was light and appeared to be polished and silver. A design of a water droplet or a tear on the handle. She pocketed it and raised her head to thank her, but she had left.
Legolas was loading supplies into a grey boat. Elizabeth made a game of unpacking what he had already put in and watched him get annoyed. He grew rather tired of the game, so he settled for sending her a half-hearted glare. He took out a piece of Lembas from a pack. Merry and Pippin were suddenly very interested.
"Lembas. Elvish waybread. One small bite is enough to fill the stomach of a grown man."
Elizabeth looked around. "Who are you talking to?"
He raised an eyebrow. "Merry and Pippin. Who else?"
"You always seem to announce things to no one in particular. I've been wondering who you're talking to." Legolas shook his head and left. "What? What did I say?" She called after his retreating form.
"How many did you eat?" Asked Merry.
Pippin belched. "Four."
She was stuck in boat with Legolas and Gimli. Perhaps you didn't grasp the seriousness of the situation. She was in a BOAT with Legolas and Gimli. While Legolas was controlling the oars, she was playing with his hair. He really didn't like that. She asked him if he had plaited his hair extra tightly so the river air didn't make it frizz. He didn't say anything, which she thought to be quite rude.
Gimli was muttering behind her. All I'm hearing is mutter, mutter, mutter. He probably can't think of anything else to say, so he's improvising. Everybody knows Gimli shouldn't improvise. It was actually rather peaceful sailing down the Silverlode.
Elizabeth felt that she should spoil it. "Methinks it is time for a singsong." She said. Fortunately for her, Legolas had a paddle in his hand, so he couldn't grab her shoulders and shake her and beg her not to, as he so wished. His Elven ears were dreading the torture.
"Hakuna Matata! What a wonderful phrase!" She chorused. "Hakuna Matata! Ain't no passing craze. It means no worries for the rest of your days. It's our problem-freeeeeee philosophy. Hakuna Matata!"
"It's happening again..." Mumbled Sam, having experienced this in past. He had heard her singing this around Rivendell and he did not care for it.
Something new! I can tell they're enjoying this. It's not every day they get to- Well, I suppose it kind of is. Switching Disney films, she sang through 'A Whole New World', 'Under the Sea,' and 'A Girl Worth Fighting For'. Gimli may have started praying for it to stop at one point. Eventually, Aragorn swivelled round to glare at her.
Someone's grumpy this morning... She thought. Their boats passed into the great river Anduin. The three Elven boats carried them steadily southward, green trees giving way to brown and withered land. A flock of birds circled high above, black against the pale sky. Her eyes flicked momentarily to Aragorn, who was eyeing them with concern.
Gimli said, "Be watchful, young Hobbits and be wary of this land. It cannot be trusted." He stood up in the boat to say this, making the river vessel rock dangerously, very nearly tipping it up.
Elizabeth shook her head. Doesn't he know not to stand up in a boat? I'll give him time. Maybe he merely forgot. Must be Galadriel's hair making him go funny in the head. She went back to her musings and occasionally singing the odd tune, making Legolas regret his decision to sit directly in front of her.
The second time Gimli stood up to shout across to Merry and Pippin, she ground her teeth together. The third time, she shared a look with Pippin that clearly stated that this was going to go badly. By the sixth time this happened, she had had enough.
"Right!" She said sternly, standing to make herself taller than him. "GIMLI!" She shouted, waving her arms wildly to get her point across. "What are you doing? Everyone knows you don't stand up in a- Whoa!"
With their combined weight at the back end of the boat, it capsized. She didn't even fall gracefully, she fell with her arms flailing like she was trying to catch herself. The water was cleaner than expected. She kicked upwards, propelling herself to the surface, coughing. Merry and Pippin crying with laughter and Aragorn sighed in a way that she could almost hear him saying, "I knew it." She looked around for Gimli and found him treading water with a ridiculous doggy-paddle. The armour certainly didn't help his buoyancy. Legolas was also in the water, practically drowning because he was laughing so much.
"Shut up." She grumbled. Legolas put the boat to rights and Gimli demanded that Legolas handed over the paddle for a while. The Elf pushed himself up and into the boat nimbly and then pulled Elizabeth in after him. Together, they hauled Gimli in, who was cursing in Dwavish Probably quite explicitly. Needless to say, no one stood up in their boat ever again.
The boats drifted slowly through the steep, rocky gorge. Two enormous rock statues, towering like 300 foot pinnacles on either side of the river. Carved images of the Gondorian kings of old. They loomed over the boats with power and majesty. Elizabeth's eyes widened at the sight.
"The Argonath." Said Aragorn, quietly. She looked him. He was paddling at the stern and spoke almost to himself. Elizabeth, surprisingly, was strangely moved by the beauty of the silent sentinels. Aragorn continued, "Long have I desired to look upon the kings of old. My kin."
The fellowship stared in stunned silence as the current took them through a narrow gap between the statues' feet.
After a while, she spoke again, "Hey, Legolas? Can I call you Will?"
"Excuse me?"
"You know, Will Turner? You know him?"
"I'm afraid I do not."
She tsked. "Shame. I thought you might suit his hair. Maybe you two could swap."
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