Chapter Nine

~Zachary Goode~

November 20

Part Two

I'm confused and the worst possibilities come to mind.

"You see, after lunch, the storm started and they called in all children…"

No.

Hell no.

"But your daughter…"

Oh, God.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

"She's gone missing."

I grabbed at my chest. Right at where my heart should be.

I'm broken, falling. A red haze blurs my vision.

I back up against the thick glass doors of the living room, letting its freezing touch run up my spine, numbing my mind.

"Mr. Goode?"

I slide down the glass doors and I can feel my heart racing despite how broken it feels.

"I'm sorry Mr. Goode, we have already notified the police. They can't send out anybody during the storm…"

"WHAT ABOUT MY SEVEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTER, HUH? SHE'S PROBABLY FREEZING OU-OUT THERE…and it's your fault for not keeping an eye her…ho-how c-could you not realize that she w-wasn't there!" I couldn't tell if I was stuttering because of the freezing glass door or because of the raging sobs that broke through me.

I assumed both.

I hate damn government officials. Even elementary school principals.

I rendered the man speechless as he said in a doubtful tone, "She'll be okay, Mr. Goode. I'm so very sorry."

"How could she be fucking fine? She's scared of the fucking voices and monsters coming from her closet! And d-don't say you're f-fu…sorry, because if you were, you would be off your ass and looking for her!"

"Mr. Goode-"

I threw the phone at the wall and watched as it shattered into thousands of pieces

I pushed myself up and my knees threatened to buckle forward. I stumbled forward, towards the closet, grabbing my sweater and snow jacket as well as MC's other snow jacket.

Hypothermia, frost bite, pneumonia…death…

All of the possibilities of the fate my angel, my life, would receive made me pause on the porch. The wind and snow whipped at my face and my stomach churned inside me and I bent over to hurl on the white snow.

Damn.

Damn damn damn.

I trudged warily through the storm, my feet dragging behind me as if it weighed a ton. The wind blew like bullets at my body, making my face flush. It got harder and harder to breathe in oxygen but I couldn't think of myself right now.

The situation was eerily familiar, as I called out MC's name frantically.

My little girl entered my thoughts. If I lost her…where would that leave me? My two favorite girls both gone…I wouldn't live. Simple as that. I just wouldn't. there would be no more morning cartoons of Rugrats or Dora the Explorer. No more tickle fights that would ensue me giving into her beautiful eyes. No more cooking her mother's favorite macadamia chocolate chip cookies. No more telling her stories of Cammie when she couldn't fall asleep because of the storms outside or the monsters in her closet. No more getting a stiff neck and aching back from sleeping in her small princess bed when she didn't want me to leave at night.

"MC!" I called desperately because I couldn't live without those things. I couldn't bare having another part of my life ripped from me. whatever higher power that looked down on me must have felt pretty damned good at that moment because my life was Hell.

How many times would I have to answer a phone call to have the knife that pierced my heart seven years ago twist and turn to intensify the pain.

So much pain, Cookie.

And as I trudged down the snow-no longer able to tell the difference between the streets and sidewalks-I realized right then where the familiarity of the situation aroused.

Because right there in the snow was that blue scarf that went with that blue coat that Cammie wore that day in seventh grade. The day Cammie had that encounter with her future stalker. Her future kidnapper.

"Promise you won't tell anyone about Luther, Zach?" Cammie had asked the next morning after Mrs. Cope made us breakfast.

"Why? He hurt you Cam!" I said squeezing our entwined hands tighter, proving to myself that she was here with me. She was here with me.

"Because it's not a big deal…" she said with a sigh, "I'm sure he didn't mean it…Besides, you'll protect me now, right?" she bit her lower lip.

"Always," I grinned thinking smugly, 'yeah, seventh graders can be romantic', "I'll always protect you Cammie."

She stood on her tip toes and kissed my nose, giggling when I held her hips and pulled her closer so I could look her in the eyes.

"When I said that we should ever stop…that wasn't a suggestion-" but before I could finish, her mouth captured mine and even the eerie, cold breeze wouldn't be able to stop us. Not ever.

"MC!" I yelled, blue scarf in hand as I looked around and my jaw fell slack as I realized where I was standing. That right in front of me was the abandoned house that served as our getaway as kids.

So many memories.

"MC!" I yelled as I saw the worn down front door ajar.

I ran up the creaky stairs, one of them giving way under my foot, splinters jabbing into my ankle.

"Shit!" I cried out until little fingers wrapped around my arm and the sweetest voice whispered through the freezing wind.

"Daddy?"

a wave of relief washed over me as I saw MC, in one piece, standing before me with a look so frightened. I forgot about my bloody ankle as I scooped my daughter into my arms and sobs racked through me.

"MC! What were you thinking? Why did you come here, baby! You know you're not allowed to run from school!" I scolded although my heart wasn't really in it as I reveled the feeling of my Munchkin in my arms.

"I'm sorry Daddy…" she said locking her ankles around my torso and her hands around my neck.

"I was so worried, baby," I kissed her little cheek when I noticed her little tears.

"I saw this house in the picture wif Mommy and I saw it out the window when you drive me to school," she says, muffled by the collar of my jacket.

My chest constricted painfully as I asked, "Why did you want to come here, Munchkin?"

She squeezes me tighter as she answers warily, "I thought Mommy might be hiding here and I could come see her," she says pulling back to look at me now and knit her eyebrows together and scrunched up her nose as she bit her lip, "But I was too scared to go inside."

I sigh with relief that she hasn't been inside. Who knows what kind of crap we left in there the last time all of us were in there?

"How about we go inside while we wait for the blizzard to pass?" I ask and she nods.

Once we're inside, I look at all of the plastic covered furniture in the old living room where Grant, Jonas, Bex, and I all used to sit around and play poker while Macey and Liz dragged Cammie to the mall. The hidden space under the staircase-that was merely a hole in the wall next to the door to the basement-where Cam and I usually made-out like horny teens.

Well, we were, at the time.

I smiled at that memory. I was thirty-fucking-years old and I still thought about necking my missing wife like a teen going through puberty.

I'm one sick bastard.

"Mommy?" MC held onto my leg and looked around the house curiously. My breathing became erratic as she continued to call for her Mommy.

But I knew she would never answer back.

"MC, want me to tell you a story?" I asked my munchkin while I sat on one of the steps of the stairs, gazing at that space under the stairs where we used to sit for hours, just talking and kissing. Just to be with each other.

"Kay, Daddy," MC crawled onto my lap and leaned her head over my heart. I automatically wrapped my arms around her small frame and thought about how I should start this out.

"One day, your Mommy and Daddy were at the lake with your Uncles and Aunts, well except Uncle Nick, and your Mommy did something mean to Daddy," I pretended to growl.

MC's eyes went wide and her mouth formed an 'o' as she asked, "What'd she do, Daddy?"

"She pushed Daddy into the lake without swim clothes on," I scowled.

MC just laughed and said, "Tha's not mean! Tha's funny Daddy!"

I tickled her for a second before I continued, "Your Mommy and Aunts said that they were tougher than Daddy and your Uncle, so one day when we all came here, your Mommy bought silly string and eggs and toilet paper to throw at all of us. But Daddy and Uncle Grant stole some of that stuff so we could throw some of it back at them."

"Was Mommy mad?" she asked.

I laughed and shook my head, "Sort of. But she was so happy, MC, she smiled a lot and laughed with Daddy."

MC smiled like she was hearing the best story ever. I sound liken a broken record in my head, but…she's so beautiful, Cookie. She's all you.

"It was the first day I told Mommy that I love her," MC broken out in a heartbreakingly beautiful smile. That same smile.

THUMP. THUMP.

"What was that?" MC wrapped herself around me again and I couldn't help but belt out a laugh.

"Probably just mice…I remember your mom acting fearless when we saw mice in here. But you could tell how terrified she really was," I let out another strangled laugh as memories assaulted my mind.

It's too much.

THUMP. THUMP.

"AGGHHH!" MC screams and I shake with laughter. "I hate mice!" MC says and basically cuts off my circulation.

I listen for the blizzard but sigh with relief when I no longer here anything but the eerie silence.

Just like that day.

"Let's get you home," I say as she snuggles closer to me, yawning.

THUMP. THUMP.

MC screams again and I take my time to look around one last time, drinking up every memory of this abandoned house.

"HURRY DADDY! It's SCARY! FASTER DADDY! WHY ARE YOU WALKING SO SLOW!"

I laugh when I realize what I'm doing and rub her back soothingly, "Okay, okay, baby. "

I close the door behind us and MC says quietly, "Mommy wasn't there…"

"I'm sorry, MC…" I hold her closer and I feel her watching the abandoned house closely as I walk down the street to our house.

I was too focused to see the van.

A.N. Thanks for being patient. Review?

Yes, I changed my penname, although this is clearly still:

~Akira