Authors Note: hello... those of you who I have not written for in a month...IM SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY! I had this major writer's block and this chapter was left half written on my computer. lol. I'm sorry this is a lame chapter, but I needed to put something up for y'all. I'm hoping to get the next chapter up soon, and make it MUCH better. C:

What would y'all like to see happen? With Alice or Henry or Margaret, or any of the other characters? What would you want to read? I want your imput on this story. Feel free to let me know! Again, I am realy appreciattive all the input on that last Chapter! Y'all are AMAZING!

Disclaimer: I do not own, under any circumstances, own Twilight. I wish!

Chapter 7: Only If

In the days that followed, Henry spent most of his time in my room, explaining everything about vampires. Today we sat against the wall, him playing with my fingers as he told me about his life, leading up to his transformation.

"I was born in 1562 in Paris, France, at the beginning of the French wars of religion. Where I stood on the matter, I still haven't a slightest idea. I am fluent in French, among other languages."

I smile. It was interesting to learn about where Henry came from. Or what time period.

"I was born with weak lungs and when I was little, it was difficult to breathe. I'd have spasms and occasionally would stop breathing." He stops, seeing my face full of concern, and laughs. "It wasn't as bad as it sounds. It just caused a few problems. Anyways, in late December of 1585, right before I changed, I got infected by a disease that attacked my lungs. I was sent to live on my death bed. Say my prayers, and fade away.

"On the last night of my life, I was visited by a woman with angelic beauty. When she entered the room, I felt a rush of calmness and knew that I would survive the night."

I look at his face, staring out into space, so engulfed with his past. "She spoke to me, in a voice that would soften even the most war-hardened man. "Allons, ma chère, je vais faire disparaître la douleur" she whispered, and I knew she was promising to take my pain away. She smiled, leaned close to me, then brushed my sweat soaked hair out of my eyes. "I'm sorry" she said, then bent down. The next thing I knew, there was a pain in the side of my neck and my whole body was on fire."

I leaned into his side as he recalled what it felt like to go through the excruciating pain. I could hear the edge in Henry's voice and I could feel my insides squeeze tight at the thought of him in pain.

"I thought that it would never end," Henry says, shifting so that I was looking up at him. "But it did" I say, and he smiles. "It did," he repeats.

"What was it like, when you first woke up?" I asked, curious. "Like I died and went to heaven. I was faster, stronger, and smarter somehow. I later found out through my studies that I have the gift of Intuition."

"What's intuition?" I ask him.

"Its basically being able to acquire knowledge without any help. Just as you being physic is your gift, intuition is mine."

"Do all vampires have gifts?" I wonder out loud.

"No," Henry wraps his stone like arms around me. "Only humans with special abilities have them as an immortal."

"So if I were to become a vampire, I would be physic?" Though I couldn't see his face, by his deep sigh gave the impression that he didn't want that to happen.

"Yes, I believe your visions would become more prominent and easier to understand. That is IF you were to become a vampire, which, by the way, you aren't." I chance looking up at him, and hold his gaze. There was so much pain in them, I had to look away.

"The other night, when I had my dream, I didn't tell you all of it," I say, feeling him relax beside me.

"I figured," Henry replies.

"Well, all that I told you was true, but it wasn't everything. You had glowing red eyes and told me you were a vampire."

Henry rolled his eyes at me and shook his head. Mockingly, he says, "So you knew I was a vampire all this time, and you didn't make any effort to stay away from me? I'm disappointed in you?"

"Well," I counter, "You didn't make an effort to stay away from me, either." I had him there.

We spent the day laughing and talking, but one question kept poking in and out of m mind. Finally, I got the courage to ask it.

"Henry?" I ask quietly. He looks over at me, dark hair covering his eyes. I reach over and brush it out of the way, and he leans his head into my hand. His cheek is cold, but it felt good to the touch.

"Yes?"

"What would happen if something separated us; if I were dying?" I was unprepared for Henry to grab my wrist and be in front of me o fast, that it made me gasp a little.

"Don't even talk about that, Alice. I won't stand it."

I pry his fingers off my wrist and stand up, heat rising to my cheeks. "Henry, something's going to happen one day. I'm going to grow old and you're not going to want me anymore. And I'll spend my whole life loving you, and then you'll be gone. I'll be alone and my memories will be a constant reminder of what I lost and then I'll die…" My rant was cut off by Henry pulling me in his arms and kissing me.

I'm left gasping for breath, but Henry doesn't let me go anywhere, but instead rested his forehead on mine.

"Alice, I asked you not to talk about that because it's too painful for me. I can't bear the thought of losing you." I catch my breath. This is not what I thought he was going to say.

"But, you won't want me when I'm an old woman!" I say, but I already know that the fight is over. I had heard what I needed to.

"Yes I will! I'll always love you as I do right now. Whether your hair is dark or gray, your eyes bright or dull, you will always be Alice." Henry says, wrapping his arms around me. "I know what you're getting at Alice. You don't want this. I know you don't. And if I were to change you, it would be the most selfish thing I'd ever do."

I pull back and stare at him in shock. "I wasn't…I didn't…" I pause. Did I want to be a vampire? No, I didn't, but what did I want? The answer was clear. "Henry, I know that I don't want to be a vampire. But I do want to spend forever with you. Promise me that if I am dying, you will change me." He looked defeated, and shook his head.

"I can't damn you to Hell, Alice, I won't."

I take Henry's face in my hands and force him to look at me. "I want you to change me only if I am dying.. Alright? Promise?"

After a few minutes, Henry sighs, and nods. "Only if you're dying," He repeats.