Here's 13... I'm off to work on 14...

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"So, I'm a dateless wonder tonight even with it being Valentine's Day." Emily joked as she walked through the bullpen with JJ. "Want to hit the gym together for a little bit?"

"Um" JJ hedged momentarily "Sure" she replied, unsure how to get herself out of going to the gym with Emily.

"Great, maybe some time on the treadmill will help us forget our dating woes." Emily laughed.

"Hm?" JJ mumbled distractedly while she looked down at her phone, as she texted Spence to let him know that she was going to the gym with Emily so she'd be a little delayed in getting home.

Emily smiled and shook her head as she watched JJ texting out of the corner of her eye. Did JJ really think she'd managed to fool a team of profiler's? Clearly she'd been seeing someone for a while now. She wondered if Morgan and Reid had caught on to how often she was going out of town? "I was just thinking the treadmill will help me vent some frustration over dating… and if that doesn't work I have a couple of pints Ben and Jerry's at home in the freezer waiting eagerly for me." Emily grinned.

JJ laughed as she tucked her phone away in her purse as they entered the elevator to head down to the gum. "Ah and the truth comes out." JJ laughed as they stepped of the elevator and headed for the locker room.

JJ wearily unlocked the door to her apartment. She'd been happy to see Spence's reply to her text message about going to the gym, 'Meet you at yours', when she and Emily got back to the locker room after their workout. She hurriedly dropped her work clothes into her gym bag, fervently hoping that she could convince Spence to wash her back for her in the shower when she got home.

As JJ stepped into the apartment, she took note of the fact that Spence must be here. The lights were on. Then the deck door slid open and he stepped though into the living room.

"Baby, what were you doing out there?" JJ asked as she walked forward into the living room to greet Spence, her hands reaching up on his chest while her fingers wrapped themselves around his purple scarf.

Spence smiled as he leaned forward and kissed JJ hello. "It's a surprise for later. You go take a shower and I'll make us dinner."

"Why don't you join me in the shower and we can make dinner together afterwards?" JJ murmured and tugged on Spence's scarf and started to walk backwards toward the bathroom and the shower, a trail of clothes dropping in their wake.

JJ moaned as she stood under the spray of the shower wrapped up in Spence's arms while he kissed her neck and shoulders. Then he reached for the shower gel… and dropped it. He bent over to pick up the bottle and lost his footing in the slippery shower. His feet slipped out from underneath him as he tumbled to the side. Spence slipping and sliding through the shower caused JJ to also lose her footing and she fell down on top of Spence.

They lay completely shocked and dazed in each other's arm for a moment before they both started laughing hysterically at the situation.

"A…a…a…are…y….yo….you….o…okay?" JJ managed in between gasps and giggles as she pushed up from Spence's chest to look at him.

Spence chortled. "Yeah… but I guess you should maybe finish your shower alone." Spence said as they raised themselves off of the floor of the shower. "I'll go with the original plan and go work on dinner while you finish showering." He reached out of the shower for a towel and then stepped safely out of the shower, securing his feet on the dry floor as he wrapped a towel around his waist.

JJ poked her head out from behind the shower curtain. "I guess this means that I'll have to wash my hair alone." She pouted.

Spence smiled and leaned in to kiss her. "I promise that whatever else you had in mind we can do later, but yes you're going to have to wash your hair alone." He said with a smile.

JJ smiled and shook her head as she watched Spence walk out of the bathroom for a moment and then she turned back to the spray of the shower and focused on getting clean so that she and Spence could enjoy their evening together.

"Are you ready for your surprise?" Spence asked as he and JJ finished cleaning up from dinner.

JJ smiled. "Yes"

"Okay, you should put on your coat, hat, and mittens." Spence replied. "We'll need to be outside for a little bit." He said as he walked over to the closet where he'd hung up their coats and scarves after the shower debacle.

Puzzled and curious, JJ pulled on her coat, scarf, hat, and mittens and followed Spence out onto the deck. She became even more curious to find a telescope set up on the deck next to her Papasan chair that was piled with blankets. She turned to look at Spence as he turned on the lights on the deck. "What?..."

Spence smiled down at JJ and wrapped his arms around her. "I didn't know what to get you for Valentine's Day… I wanted it to be something extraordinary. Flowers and candy didn't seem like it was quite enough to let you know how I feel about you. I wanted something that would always be there to let you know how I feel about you. Something eternal… so I um… " Spence said as he pulled back and reached over to the chair to grab JJ's present and hand it to her.

JJ looked up at Spence. "Baby… you didn't have to get me anything. I know you love me. I love your too. Spending time with you is enough."

Spence grinned. "I know, but open your present." He said, anxious to see if she liked it.

JJ fumbled with the package a bit as she tried to open it with her gloves on and then finally she managed to peel the wrapping paper away to reveal a velvet jeweler's box. She opened the box curious as to what it was. The box was too large for it to be earrings or a ring.

She was met with the sight of a beautiful heart pendant necklace engraved with her name and then below it a string of letters and numbers that had no meaning to her. She looked up at Spence. "It's beautiful…" she ran her thumb across the engraving.

Spence nodded. "I uh… named a star after you. This is its coordinates in the sky." He said as his thumb followed hers across the engraving on the pendant. "Would you like to see it? I already have the telescope focused on it."

JJ smiled and nodded as she leaned up on her tip toes and kissed Spence softly for his very sweet and thoughtful Valentine's gift, and then followed him over to the telescope to look at her Valentine's gift.

After looking at the new 'Jennifer Jareau' star Spence and JJ cuddled up together in the Papasan chair, wrapped up in blankets as they watched the night sky until they were too cold and had to go inside.

"Hey, how was your day?" JJ asked as slipped off her heels in the entrance way to Spence's apartment and crossed the living room to sit next to him.

Spence put down the large tome he'd been reading and wrapped an arm around JJ. "Not altogether as uneventful as I told Morgan." He said as proceeded to tell her about his and Hotch's adventures in an interrogation room with an unchained Chester Hartwick while the prison guards were all out with the rest of the prison population in the yard.

JJ listened with large eyes as Spence finished the story.

"So it was ultimately uneventful, but more than a little terrifying while it was happening. How about you?" he asked as he ran his hand down her side.

"Well," JJ said as she scooted closer to Spence. "my day started with Garcia being all flustered about Rossi having caught her in flagrante delicto with Kevin Lynch…."

"Wait, was that what the whole Garcia and Kevin sitting in a tree was all about?" Spence asked as a puzzled look crossed his face.

"You didn't know what that meant?" JJ asked, momentarily surprised. Then she caught herself and nodded as she thought out loud. "You graduated from high school at twelve… of course you wouldn't know what that meant…. Yes. That's what that was about." JJ smiled at Spence as she thought about how she could explain the children's method of teasing each other to her boyfriend in a much more fun manner later in the evening.

"Oh" Spence replied with a nod. "So… Garcia and Kevin…"

JJ nodded. "Can you imagine being caught by Rossi of all people? Better them than us though. So then Emily discovered Rossi's office completely torn apart and…" she continued to fill Spence in on how she, Morgan, Emily, and Pen had helped Rossi to wrap up his 20 year old cold case.

"Its one day at a time cher, but don't you worry; I'm going to be fine." Will answered in response to JJ's question about how he was. JJ had just finished telling him all about thier case in Pittsburgh with several murders staged to look like suicides.

"But isn't it weird to still be his partner and work together even though things didn't work out?" JJ asked in regards to the fact that Charlie and Will were still partners at work.

"A little bit, but going through a little bit of strangeness right now is worth it if it means I get to keep Charlie in my life and we can be friends again someday." Will answered.

"I guess" JJ replied.

"Let me put it this way for you cher. Say something happened and things between you and Spencer didn't work out, would you want to cut him out of your life completely… or would you be willing to do what it takes to have him still be in your life any way you could, even if it was only as friends?" Will asked.

JJ blinked as she realized that Will was exactly right. If something was to happen, god forbid, between her and Spence and they weren't together anymore she would still want him in her life. "You're right. But are you sure you're okay?"

"Oh… I didn't say it was easy cher. He asked me to be his best man… in front of Allison, so of course I said yes so as not to cause a scene… then he showed up here earlier wanting us to get back together." Will said with a snort.

"Will, tell me that you didn't take him back." JJ said, worried that their friend had caved.

"No, I didn't." Will replied. "Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely hoping that Charlie will realize what a mistake he's making and break it off with Allison… "

JJ snorted with laughter at the image in her mind.

"What's so funny cher?" Will asked.

"I just got this image in my mind of the groom running off with the best man. I can't imagine that is a scenario that any bride prepares for." JJ laughed wiping the tears from her eyes.

JJ's laughter was contagious and that caused Will to laugh as well at the thought. He could definitely see the humor in it.

JJ smiled. It was good to hear Will laugh again after everything he'd been through. Maybe she and Spence could convince Will to get back out in the dating world again.

At that moment, Spence came out fresh from the shower in his pajamas. He lifted JJ's pajama clad legs and slid under them and dropped them on his lap. He rubbed his hand up and down her calf as he turned to look at his girlfriend.

Spence had been having his own rough time over the course of the last few weeks. Ever since the case in Chula Vista, he hadn't been able to get the image of Ryan Phillip's head exploding out of his head. All he wanted was to forget. Even though he knew it wasn't an option, would never be an option again, he craved the sweet hazy oblivion that a dliaudid high would bring, if only for a short while.

Spence startled as that thought crossed his mind. He and JJ needed to talk.

JJ smiled as she nodded while listening to Will on the phone. "Hang on Will, Spence is here now." JJ put the phone on speaker and held it out between herself and Spence.

"Hey Spencer, how's it going?" Will asked with a grin on his face even though his friend couldn't see it.

"H… h… hey Will" Spence responded, his voice cracking.

JJ studied Spence's facial expression. Between that and the cracking of his voice, she could tell that something was wrong.

"Baby?" JJ said softly, rubbing Spence's arm where it rested on her leg, "What is it; what's wrong?"

Spence turned his sad brown eyes towards hers and she recognized the pain there and squeezed his hand. "Will, maybe we should talk later." JJ said as she reached for the phone.

Spence shook his head. "No, its okay." Will had shared his pain with him. To be honest, he didn't want JJ to have to bear the burden of what he was about to say all alone. He wanted JJ to have someone she could talk to about this besides him if she needed to.

"Are you sure Spencer? If you and JJ need to talk I can just…" Will replied.

Spence shook his head. "I need to talk… I need to say things… I'd like if you'd both hear me out." He said softly.

JJ shifted and sat up next to Spence, curling her legs underneath her and wrapping one arm around him while her other hand held his.

"I uh… do you remember the nightmares I had the first time I uh visited?" Spence asked.

"Yeah… those were somethin' fierce." Will replied.

"I uh… about a year ago…" Spence as he began explaining everything that had happened with Henkel to Will.

JJ buried her face in the soft cotton of Spence's t-shirt as she listened to him recount all of the horrible events from just over a year ago including his issues with dilaudid. She reached up and wiped the tears from her face, knowing that she needed to be strong for Spence. He needed her right now.

"…I've been seeing that kids face all the time man… sometimes when I close my eyes… I still see Jack pulling the trigger… and the bullet from the shot gun making impact… and all I want is to forget and I just… I just want to escape for a little while…" Spence continued.

JJ closed her eyes for a moment as Spence talked about wanting to forget Ryan Phillip's face… about wanting to use dilaudid again because it would help to make all the bad things go away for a little while.

"I know it's not an option." Spence continued, "But that doesn't make the….craving… any less and I… I…"

Spence paused for a moment. "I … I've been doing some research on support groups in the area… I think I need to join one." Spence said as he ran his hand up and down JJ's back. "I know I've been doing well on my own… talking to you both helps, but I need to talk to other people who are going through what I'm going through… people who know what it's like to struggle and fight against the cravings." Spence sighed.

Will nodded and cleared his throat as he listened to his friend's suffering on the other end of the phone. He could vaguely hear JJ sniffling in the background. "You know Spencer. It takes a brave man to admit he has a problem. It takes an incredible amount of will power to quit, especially all on your own without and help from anyone else. But it takes a smart man to realize when he needs help. Whatever I can do to help Spencer, you just let me know."

"You already have, more than you know." Spencer replied.

"Listen, I'm going to go… because I know that you and JJ need to talk. But I'm serious. If you need anything, all you have to do is call." Will replied.

"Thanks man. Talk to you soon." Spence said as he reached out and hung up JJ's phone.

JJ sat looking up at Spence. "I love you Spence. I support you one hundred percent, you know that right?"

Spence nodded. "I love you too."

JJ nodded. "Good, then I want you to do whatever you feel that you need to in order to stay sober and off of dilaudid. Almost losing you last year terrified me and I don't want to ever have to go through something like that again." She said as she wrapped her arms around Spence and held him.

"Damn you Spence" JJ shouted at Spence as she turned to face him. "Do you have any idea what it was like to watch you out into that street unarmed and face a kid with an assault rifle? What were you thinking?" JJ asked clenching her fists while her anger over Spence's carelessness raged in her eyes. Then as quickly as it had burst forth, her anger subsided and she sighed. "Baby, I just told you not even a week ago that I couldn't bear to lose you… and you just put yourself in the line of fire without even… why?" she asked softly as she sat down on the couch rubbing her forehead.

Spence sat down next to JJ and reached out for her hand in her lap. "JJ, babe, I'm sorry that I scared you, but I can't be sorry about saving Owen. I needed to win one. I couldn't watch another kid get shot in front of me. I… when I was a kid… I was just like Owen."

"No, Spence you weren't." JJ said shaking her head when she looked at him.

"Yeah, I was. I was a smart kid, but I didn't fit in." Spence said as he turned to face JJ. "You know being a 12 year old high school senior is a lot harder than you would think. I was tormented and bullied everyday. …" he swallowed as he paused.

JJ wrapped her hands around Spence's as she sat facing him. She wasn't sure what he was going to say about his time in high school, but she was sure after everything they'd seen on this last case, that she wasn't going to like what had been done to him. "Spence?" she asked squeezing his hands.

"This one time, I was in the library studying and Harper Hillman came in and told me that Alexa Lisbon wanted to uh meet me behind the field house." Spence said swallowing. JJ was only the second person he'd ever told about this… and both had been within the last 24 hours.

JJ quirked her head in all the stories she heard from Spence and Ethan about their childhood years in Las Vegas, she never heard either of those names and she'd certainly never heard Spence talk about any girls he'd dated… she waited to hear what he was going to say.

Spence swallowed again and took a deep breath. "I had a uh huge crush on Alexa… she was easily the prettiest girl in school… so of course I went to the field house after school. A… a… and Alexa was there with the whole football team. They stripped me naked and tied me to a goal post … there were so many kids there and nobody tried to help. They just stood and watched. Eventually they got bored and left… I got home at midnight after I finally worked myself free from the ropes they used… when I got home Mom was having an episode… so she didn't even know I'd been gone…"

JJ crawled into Spence's lap and wrapped her arms around him, sick at the thought of a young Spence having had to go through that. "Baby I'm sorry… I…"

"You know what the hardest part about this last case was?" Spence asked.

JJ shook her head and leaned back to look at Spence's face.

"Wondering what it was that made Owen Savage and I different. Wondering what it was that kept me from becoming him or him from becoming me…." Spence said softly as he looked at JJ.

"Baby… you'll never know the answer to that." JJ said, rubbing her thumb across his cheek bone. "But you did save him."

Spence shook his head. "Did I? He killed eight people JJ… in Texas. He could get the death penalty."

JJ sighed and closed her eyes as she rested her forehead against Spence's temple, not knowing what to say. "I wish I knew what to say to make it better Spence."

"I do too JJ, I do too. But I can't change what Owen did and I certainly don't have any control over what happens to him. I'm just thankful for whatever it was that kept me from ending up like Owen." Spence whispered softly.

"Me too baby. Me too." JJ murmured in his ear as she twisted in his lap and wrapped her arms around him.