Heylo everyone! I apologize at this long haitus. Hopefully I'm back on the bandwagon. Please forgive me and thank you for your patience. I really appreciate all your feedback and thank you to all those that read this silly-ness! )

Special thank you to Geeky BMWW Fan for betaing this. You are the best my friend!

And also a special thank you to Kippling Croft for reading it over once and giving me a thumbs up.

Disclaimer: None of the above is owned by meh. Just the strange plot bunnies that took over

Chapter Seven: Wraith Are Like Mummies; Without that Toilet Paper Problem

"Wormhole Extreme. Wormhole Extreme!" Gus exclaimed to Shawn; Shawn was now giving him an incredulous look. The entire group had been wordlessly following the colonel down various hallways. But of course, a few things finally dawned on Gus. And he had to share them out loud.

John, however, couldn't agree with him more. But he remained silent.

"You do realize that we've left the comic-con, right?" Shawn asked.

Gus glared over at his friend. "Yeah." He looked around him. "For some reason, everything had looked so... I don't know... familiar. It's strange. But then I figured it out."

Shawn held up his hand. "As far as I know, this is a nerd free zone." He then pointed to his friend and gave him a mock frown. "How does it feel to be a minority?"

"I'm black," Gus said with an eye roll.

Shawn shook his head. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Seriously!" John stopped and pivoted on his heel to stare them down. Having them along was slowly grating on his nerves. Sure, he was stuck with them, but he could make this easier on himself.

Lorne, on the other hand, wasn't sharing John's sentiments. He was actually laughing at Shawn and Gus as if they were the comic relief needed in their dire situation.

John pointed to one of the Marines. "Escort them to the cafeteria."

"What? Why?" Shawn gaped. "We'll be good, we promise. We want to see you in action!"

John switched his gaze to Shawn. "Sorry, you're going to have to sit this one out."

"If we're attacked by aliens, I'm holding you accountable," Gus said firmly while pointing.

"You'll be fine. ... And they have pineapple sorbet," John sighed.

This prompted Shawn to perk up. "Dole?"

"Dole."

Shawn gestured to the Marine closest to them. "Lead the way!"

As John watched the three walk off, he felt as though a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders.

He also heard Lorne chuckle as they continued down to the chair room. "They are pretty interesting, sir."

"Interesting isn't the right word."

"How are you going to explain them being here?"

That was the real question, however, John didn't have an answer for it.

John pressed his lips together and shook his head. "I have no idea."

As Sheppard and Lorne turned the corner and entered the chair room, a wave of familiarity hit them. He hadn't been gone long enough to really miss Atlantis, but in all actuality, he had. Feeling at ease, John marched over to the chair and took a seat. The power hadn't been directed to it yet, so it hadn't responded to his touch.

"Once you use this sequence... we'll redirect the Zed-PM power simultaneously," Rodney's voice said from somewhere.

Rodney and Zelenka had been working on the power supply, and they now occupied the chair room as well.

Rodney stopped once he noticed Sheppard's hair poking over the back of the chair.

"Hello, Colonel."

John nodded to him as McKay walked over. "Rodney. Ready to do this thing?"

"Ready when you are."

"Just so you know, Colonel, once we direct the ZPM to power the chair... the shield will be non-functional..." Zelenka added pointedly.

Rodney sighed. "He knows, Radek. Just do it all already."

Zelenka, while glaring at Rodney, tapped his Lantean device in his hand and immediately in a low hum, the chair came to life.

John closed his eyes and felt the chair feed through him, responding to his every move.

"So I heard there was a mishap on the Daedelus and you brought someone along with you," Rodney grinned. "Is it a girl?"

Why and how did news travel so fast? It was mind boggling.

Biting his lip in frustration, John had been aiming at the first dart, but Rodney's impish voice caused him to miss. The vision of Shawn and Gus eating sorbet in the cafeteria, instead, filled his brain. He also had a few thoughts of clobbering McKay at the fist chance he could get.

"McKay!" John opened his eyes to glare up at him. "Do you mind?"

Rodney smiled apologetically. "Sorry, sorry..." He held up his hands at that.

John refocused his thoughts while closing his eyes and returned to the darts patrolling outside the city. Now that the shield was down, it was worrisome. But hopefully he could get to them in time.

John shot at the first dart like an expert marksman, and it immediately exploded. Feeling relieved that the first one had been taken care of, John turned to the other two darts. However, the strangest thing happened. The first dart committed suicide. Or it had a horrible pilot at its helm, since it collided into the tallest pier, exploding into nothingness. The strength of the Atlantian structure hardly budged at the foreign object pelting it.

John shrugged off the strange feeling he got and he switched to the very last dart, but it too rammed itself into a high rise of the city... obliterating itself.

"Just as I thought..." He heard Radek say grimly. Rodney must have been in agreement with him.

"They've beamed themselves into the city." Rodney's voice now echoed a slight panic. Lorne was already at work with that, rounding up his team and scattering them throughout the city as he left the chair room.

Instead of fretting over their newest issue, John remained focused and thought towards the hive ship out in the atmosphere. It was a long shot, no pun intended, but he had to try.

Keeping his head as clear as he could, John powered up the chair and weapons platform to its limit and sent the fiery projectiles out into space. Even while flying through the atmosphere, the projectiles hadn't lost their momentum. He sent out six, the most he could, and he focused on the weak areas of the enormous ship threatening them.

John had practically maimed the ship. It started maneuvering out of the way to gain lightspeed. John wasn't going to let the ship leave, since the threat of other Wraith knowing their location loomed in the back of his mind.

Focusing so intently that his brain started to ache, John sent another two projectiles toward the ship. The last one that ripped through the ship's hull added the most damage. The feeling of victory embraced him as the ship exploded into a fiery haze.

Gasping loudly, John depowered the chair and stood up along with it.

Rodney was looking at him wide-eyed. "You destroyed the hive ship."

He was in shock himself. He felt a hand patting him on the back. John looked over to see that it was a smiling Radek Zelenka.

"Wonderfully executed, Colonel."

"Thanks I ...uh..." John stopped. There were Wraith in the city.

McKay nodded when he realized what the look on John's face meant. "There are at least two Wraith somewhere in Atlantis."

"Oh my God." John stood up immediately and started running down the hall in his flip flops. "Shawn and Gus!"

McKay and Zelenka took off after him.

"Who are Shawn and Gus?" Radek asked his colleague.

Rodney shrugged.

Shawn shoveled another spoonful of pineapple sorbet into his mouth. "This is so good. It's like Disneyland good."

Gus raised a brow and looked over at his friend. He was busy checking out the architecture of the cafeteria. "Disneyland good?"

"Yeah, you know. The Tiki Room? Remember? And they have that pineapple stand out front." Shawn seemed to be salivating at the mere thought of it. He also started humming the Tiki Room song.

"You would remember that," Gus scoffed. He walked over to the window while still holding his hardly touched chocolate frozen yogurt. The sun was shining brightly outside and he could get a better look of where they were sent to.

Gus glanced at the cafeteria entrance and eyed the Marine standing guard. They weren't going anywhere soon, that was for certain.

"Is it just me, or do you feel like a prisoner?"

"Hmm?" Shawn looked up at him, spoon in mouth.

"Never mind." Gus turned back to the window and gazed out the oversized window. The outdoors happened to be calling his name, but he had no idea where on Earth... or rather in the universe he was. At least he was safe inside a cafeteria. He paused to study the strange buildings and odd landscape that engulfed the area. Or rather, lack of landscape. It seemed as though the entire place was surrounded by water.

"It's like the entire place is surrounded by water," Shawn said from right next to him.

With a jump, Gus yelped and looked over at where Shawn had been sitting and then looked back at his friend. "Shawn! You scared me."

"You're awfully jumpy." Shawn looked Gus in the eye. "You don't have some weird alien disease do you?"

"I don't know! Maybe I do! For all I know, we're all dead and this is the afterlife, Shawn!" Gus narrowed his eyes at his friend. "And would you stop humming the Tiki Room song?!"

Immediately, Shawn and Gus then stopped what they were doing and looked over at the Marine standing guard. He could overhear everything they were saying, but he looked more than bored.

Gus leaned over to his friend and whispered, "Do you think this is some conspiracy? Maybe we're all still on earth and we're under mind control or something."

"Mind control!" Shawn whispered back. "We're not at the Scientology headquarters."

Gus shook his head. "What are you talking about?" He asked quietly.

"Never mind," Shawn answered still in whisper.

They both, again, turned to look at the Marine who hadn't moved a muscle and they returned back to staring out the large window.

"I just wish something would really prove that this is another galaxy and not some weird freaky dream," Gus retorted.

As if in answer to his demand, a stealthy, pointy alien ship streaked across the front of the window, its engines roaring loudly. Both Shawn and Gus screamed in shock at the sight of it. They also watched it ram itself into the long pier just meters from where they were standing. It exploded into oblivion right before their eyes.

Shawn and Gus turned to look at each other. And almost without another word, they zoomed over to the Marine.

He was already busy speaking with someone over a com-link in his ear. "Understood, sir."

Finished with his conversation, he shook his head. "Sorry, guys. I'm going to have to leave you here. I'm under orders given to me by Major Lorne. Don't move."

With that, the Marine turned to the door and it swished opened and he closed it immediately.

Gus was still in shock. By the time he finally got out the words he meant to say, it was too late.

"You're leaving us in here?!" Gus asked frantically. But the Marine was already gone.

Shawn had ventured back to the window. He looked out and saw nothing out of the ordinary. Other than the fact that everything looked out of the ordinary.

"Gus, c'mon... it's fine. Look."

"Shawn, you will not get me near that window and I certainly will not..." Gus stopped. Another explosion could be heard. It wasn't as close at the first, but it still silenced him..

"We're going to die!" Gus was now more than frantic.

Shawn jogged over to him. He looked over at the cafeteria kitchen. Even that seemed empty. It was as if everyone had been called to duty.

He eyed the door for a moment. "Maybe we should get out of here. You know... take a look around."

That seemed to frighten Gus further. He shook his head. "We were told to stay here. I think that's a better idea. Maybe we should stay still John comes to get us."

Shawn laughed loudly. "Since when do we take orders from Major What's His Face?"

"Since it involved space ships exploding in front of our eyes, Shawn!"

Shawn wasn't paying attention anymore. He switched his focus onto the door and eyed it for a moment. With a swift motion of his hand in front of the door's sensor, it swished opened.

Gus took in a lungful of air.

Shawn was the first to poke his head out into the hallway. All was clear..

"It looks fine." He ventured out further and glanced around. He motioned Gus to follow him. Gus shook his head at first, but Shawn became aggressive with motioning him to follow.

"Don't be such a wuss!" He said in a loud whisper.

"I am not a wuss!" Gus answered in just as loud of a whisper. Still, even after that declaration, Gus tiptoed close to the door and looked out into the hallway. It seemed clear. Feeling slightly ok with the situation, Gus walked out into the hallway and took in a shallow breath.

"Now where?" He asked quietly.

Shawn looked in both directions. And, to Gus's dismay, he randomly picked one. "This way."

Eyeing the safe haven of the cafeteria one last time, Gus followed his friend rather closely. "Are you sure this is the right way? Nothing looks familiar."

Shawn made a face. "Oh, I'm sorry... I forgot you were the tour guide."

Gus rolled his eyes at that and Shawn continued further down the hallway. It didn't feel right, that was for certain.

The hallway was also eerily empty.

Gus swore he heard something behind him. "What was that?"

"What was what?"

"Never mind."

Letting out a sigh, Gus and Shawn walked further downward.

Gus heard it again, but he realized that it was his imagination playing with him. So he decided to ignore it, and also, because, he didn't want to look behind him and see that there was actually something there.

Shawn seemed grim. "I think we're going nowhere."

Gus was too scared to laugh in Shawn's face about that, so he simply nodded. He also heard the sound again. This time, the hair on the back of his neck stood up. He turned around, facing his fears, and glanced behind him.

The sight almost made him wet his pants.

Standing right behind them was a leather clad, pasty looking alien. He was much taller than the both of them and he looked as though he was extremely pissed off about something. Gus also couldn't help but notice that it reminded him of a mummy, and not in a good way.

Trying not to scream, Gus whimpered loudly instead and he reached for Shawn. He started poking him in the arm repeatedly.

"Dude, would you stop!"

Shawn at once turned around to see what Gus was looking at.

And his jaw went slack.

The alien hissed loudly at both at them and held up his hand at if it were a weapon on its own. "You two will give me the codes to the armory. Or you will be the first I feed upon!" His voice was more frightening than his face.

Shawn and Gus hardly budged. Gus let out some sort of squeal and Shawn was simply petrified.

The alien growled loudly and lunged for one of them, but it stopped short as it was shot in the back repeatedly by red energy bursts.

Shawn and Gus watched the thing fall and lay in a heap on the floor and then they looked up to see who had shot it. Their savior wasn't as reassuring.

He was just as tall as the alien and he had a wiry mane of dreads. He also held his gun up at the two of them, not taking the chance to lower it.

"Who are you?!" The wild man demanded.

Gus held his hands up and wouldn't move otherwise.

Shawn did the same. However he muttered under his breath, "there is no place like home, there is no place like home..."

What did you think? Let me know! And again, thank you for reading!

Michelle Morris- Wow, thank you so much! So glad you are liking this. ) And I so apologize that it has taken me awhile to get to this, I promise to keep up on this. Thank you again!

Janiqua- Thank you! I hope to incorporate Henry soon!

harpie20- I couldn't agree with you more. James and Joe look a like, more so than the other brother... ol what's his name... Dave. lol Thank you for the review!

TMB- Thank you! Hope you enjoy this update. )

not for lack of trying- Thank you for the review. And 'Jedi' is on a bit of a hiatus, but I will finish it. I promise! )

amanda- Thank you for your feedback. I so really appreciate it! D