Maerad sat next to Cadvan at the long table in the dining hall. The room here in the School of Innail was large, but they were the only people in there.

"Cadvan…" Maerad began uncertainly, her voice echoing off the stone walls. "I'm…scared."

At once, Cadvan gazed deep into her eyes. "What troubles you, Maerad?" he asked, setting down his late-night supper. They had only arrived here an hour or so before this time, and it was the first chance the two of them had got to eat.

Maerad was too ashamed to meet Cadvan's eyes. "I fear what I must face," she confessed shakily. "And I fear…I fear what will happen to me afterwards."

"But you do not know what will happen to you afterwards. I assume it is this which frightens you?"

Maerad nodded, her gaze still fixed on the wooden table. "I want…to love, but I fear it. I fear not finding love also. And Cadvan, it hurts," she added, turning shining eyes to him so that for the first time he realised how distraught she was and laid a hand over hers where she had been twisting them in her lap. "It hurts that I cannot do what is so natural to so many people just because of my past. I feel like I am helpless before Sharma, that there is no saviour from him, and even if there was I would be left alone and without love because I just don't know how to love…And it hurts," she finished, her tears spilling over into her cheeks.

Cadvan put his arms tight around her and held her in silence until she had stopped crying and she was no longer shaking. As he released her, Maerad looked away, ashamed of her fear and of her outburst, but Cadvan turned her face towards him with one hand. He left his fingers touching lightly on her cheeks as he said, "You know quite well, deep within you, that there is only a single magic, a single power, a single salvation...and that is called loving. Well, then, love your suffering. Do not resist it, do not flee from it. It is your aversion that hurts, nothing else. As soon as you realise that nothing can change the past, that all you can do is shape the present in the hope that it might influence the future, you will find peace and you will no longer be afraid of love. I can say nothing of your fear of Sharma other than that sometimes a little fear is sensible. But not of love, Maerad. You need never be afraid of love."

"I suppose I am not so afraid of it any more. I am afraid of not finding it," Maerad replied, his eyes capturing hers gently and causing the truth to spill out of her.

"Oh, Maerad, there are many, even now, who love you with all their heart and soul. There are those that would die for you." He leaned forwards slightly, as though to tell her a great secret, his face no more than a few inches from hers. "And there is one who cannot bear the thought of life without you."

Maerad stopped breathing. She stared unblinkingly into Cadvan's eyes, praying he meant what she thought he did. After a moment, Cadvan removed his hand from her cheek and stood up. She was able to breathe again. He looked saddened, and Maerad thought she had done something wrong as she watched him walking away.

"Cadvan…" she called after him uncertainly. He paused, already almost at the door, and turned halfway towards her without looking up. Maerad stood slowly and took careful, measured steps towards him. Her footsteps sounded loud in the large room, and yet at the same time they were dwarfed by its vastness. As Maerad stopped in front of Cadvan she reached for his hand. Cadvan watched his hand being taken, then looked up at Maerad to see she was already looking at him. There was silence for the space of a heartbeat. "Kiss me," Maerad whispered.

Cadvan leaned down and kissed her firmly, his lips lingering on hers and his eyes tightly closed. As he drew away, Maerad smiled. "I guess you were right," she said shyly. "As soon as I stopped concentrating on the past, I realised who I wanted my future with."

As Cadvan looked at her, Maerad could immediately tell that he was more content than ever she had seen him. "That means a lot to me," he told her quietly. "Thank you." He kissed her again, his lips touching hers only briefly this time.

Time stopped, went backwards, and re-wrote itself.

--

Inspired by the quote: You know quite well, deep within you, that there is only a single magic, a single power, a single salvation...and that is called loving. Well, then, love your suffering. Do not resist it, do not flee from it. It is your aversion that hurts, nothing else. (by Herman Hesse) And the last line (time stopped etc) was stolen from Kathryn Shadow…I hope you don't mind, KS, I just couldn't think of another way to end it.
Also, thanks to Kiaga89 who helped edit. =D