Government Hooker - Kigo

Chapter 6: "Found Your Pussy!"

Just to make things orderly I've used the ~Flackback~ for this chapter, being I didn't like for those moments to be in just first person, that is just too limited for my liking.

~FlashBack~

"Hey, I'm kinda busy right now, Wade…" the hero stated as she stood on stage, holding her Kimmunicator in one hand while trying to accept her award with the other.

The boy genius had a look of apology on his face, "I hate to ruin your ceremony but Shego has escaped Global Justice custody and she-"

The boy was cut off as an alarm began to go off in the background, the lights beginning to turn red and occasionally flash. This caught Kim's attention as she ignored the President and instead staring at the screen of her Kimmunicator. The occupants on stage were now curious of to what could be more important than her ceremony, they began to creep behind the hero and look over her shoulder.

"What's the sitch, Wade?" the hero now questioned more forcibly, after not receiving an answer for a couple of minutes.

"You should take a look at this…" he muttered before flipping a switch and the video feed to her Kimmunicator now shown a hallway littered with the bodies of Global Justice Agents. It then moved to another video of even more bodies, the camera lens was stained with a crimson liquid, and soon was covered in it making seeing impossible. Finally the feed switched to a seemingly clear hallway in front of the Director's door, all was peaceful and calm before yet another body of a Global Justice Officer appeared. The body was thrown through the door, disappearing into the room, suddenly out of the left-hand corner of the screen a body engulfed in plasma came into view. It began walking across the floor leaving footprints where the plasma burned holes in the tile flooring, working its way to the Director's office.

Kim's eye widened as the figure's plasma was extinguished, revealing Shego's form, the hero gasped as the mercenary's demonic smirk ceased for a moment when she blew the camera a kiss.

The video feed soon switched back to a panicking Wade, "Kim! You need to get down there; half of the GJ officers are dead and with Shego gaining access to Director's personal computer I'm afraid we are on the verge of mass chaos! I'm sending transportation as we speak!"

Kim nodded in understanding before sprinting off to the edge of the stage, jumping over it and heading towards the front gates of the outdoor arena. The hero's eyebrow soon raised as she became confused, opening up her Kimmunicator yet again, "Wade? Why are we spazzin' over Director's computer?"

The boy genius took a deep breath, clearly troubled, "The computer has access to all information, even restricted government files, with the press of a button. In short, that computer makes mine looks like a tinker toy."

Kim stopped in her tracks, "Why on earth would Global Justice do that? I mean come on! Who the hell thought this stupid shit up; the fuck is wrong with you guys! Letting giving all this power to a god damn machine that just about any brainless-dickless fuck can use!"

Wade was taken aback by Kim's outburst, he had never heard her curse before not even lose her cool like that, but before he could question her behavior the hero had disconnected. She did have a point though, it wasn't the smartest of things to do but then again Global Justice has the perfect track record of having no break-ins in the past nor of having any sort of security breach. So in a way that was the smartest thing to do, no point in making a separate room for the computer when it could just go in the center of the base.

The boy shook his head, already proceeding in trying to create a program to put the computer on a temporary lockdown but someone, most likely Shego, had already accessed it and was restricting all incoming connections to the said computer. Wade hollered as he became more and more annoyed at the green female, before completely having a meltdown as his systems started to malfunction. He already knew the world was fucked, simply and truly fucked without any form of protection to help it along.

~/FlashBack~

The blonde girl groaned as artificial sunlight soaked into the room, and onto her face blinding her sleeping eyes in the process, "Mistress, close the curtains! T'is too bright!"

Blondie whined pitifully as she contemplated on just closing them herself, deciding against it she instead slapped the opposite side of the bed to find that the spot that would usually have the warm, curvy body of the Empress was now cold and barren. The girl shot up in shock, looking around frantically, different possibilities flashing through her mind as to why her Mistress was missing in action this morning before she remembered the events of the previous day. A look of dismay plastered itself to her face as she pouted while curling up into a ball, pulling the covers over her head, starting to sob.

The girl wasn't used to being alone; she was a sheep and liked to follow her shepherd, or in her Mistress' case: wolf in sheep's clothing. Now that her shepherd was gone the room seemed to take on a menacing tone, anyone observant enough would see the depressing monochromatic color choices involved in all the décor. The only light source was the artificial sunlight that illuminated behind a fake window at one end of the room; Anne thought it would be a nice touch to add it, just having normal lights would tired someone out if that was all they had for lighting.

Blondie now slowly peeked her head out from under the blankets when she heard a knock at the door, after a moment of thought she retreated back into her cave. She wasn't in the mood to put up with neither Will Du's bullshit nor Donald's damnable dog that would always tackle her, depends on whichever party had actually knocked. Blondie already knew this day was going to suck, for lack of a better word to describe this situation, it seemed all the Global Justice staff was trying to get into her good favors as if that would help their careers take off.

The ass-kissing had started the day prior, when her Mistress had officially left, officially as in the time when the older woman actually left for the last time she had came back twice to say her goodbyes to the girl and to scare her guards into laying down their life if it was needed for the blonde. First off the entire servant workforce had come to see if she needed anything, only to be shooed away by Anne who was becoming increasingly annoyed by her co-worker's actions. Then Donald showed up from wherever he usually hid to inform her that he will be her faithful bodyguard for the coming days only to be interrupted by his dog tackling the blonde to the ground giving her wet kisses. Finally the cooks showered the girl in her favorite breakfast foods, of which included maple-syrup covered vegetarian sausage, a macaroni and cheese omelet covered in mayonnaise, amongst many other concoctions that only the girl could come up with. By the end of the meal the cooks were now in agreement with their Empress, the girl was odd.

~Flashback Continued~

"Wow, Shego really does work fast… I hardly even recognize this place anymore…" Kim thought as she snuck through the bushes towards the Global Justice Headquarters' entrance.

The base had taken a turn for the better in the mere few hours Shego had taken command; the normally quiet courtyard was now ablaze with activity, the surviving officers were sprinting to various places with General Marcus standing the middle of the chaos barking out orders, his face red from his screaming with a vein on his neck looking as if it would burst at any given moment. Kim shook her head in disbelief; she already knew what had happened, she had warned Dr. Director about something like this, but in the back of her mind knew that it would never happen because of the loyalty she assumed the officers had towards Global Justice. Apparently she was wrong, the bastards let themselves be bought off with Shego's newly acquired funds, they couldn't be that money hungry could they?

The hero gritted her teeth together; she was now the enemy, no doubt about that so it wasn't like she could just let herself in without dodging an array of bullets and alerting the mercenary of her actions in the process. After a moment's thought she grinned, why play the sneaky hero? Why not go for something more scandalous and actually barge her way into the base? She did have on her battle suit, as much as it needed some repair it would hold up long enough.

A bush rustling behind her caused the hero's head to snap towards it, her body crouched in a fighting stance only to breathe a sigh of a relief as Ron appeared. Ron held his finger to his lips as the hero tried to inquire why they were here, with his other hand he handed her a note.

The note looked to have been written in a hurry, the writing was messy and scratchy, hardly legible to the hero at all:

Kim,

Don't try to the hero, as usual, we need to work out a plan, I've received word that all Global Justice Officers have been ordered to shoot you on sight. I know you've probably figured that out already, but I'm just confirming that. Also, your battle suit will NOT hold up against that kind of gunfire, especially now that it's been to hell and back with your fight with Shego last night.

I need to repair it, and we need a plan, so just follow Ron to the meeting place.

-Wade

P.S. My computers are shot, literally, some guys broke in and destroyed them… Explains this note.

P.S.S. Destroy your Kimmunicator, GJ can track you from its GPS function.

The hero looked up at her friend at a loss, she had never felt so helpless in her life, Kim had never had to just give up, she was the 'girl that could do anything.' But now as she quietly backed away from the base she finally knew how it felt to lose, it wasn't an emotion she particularity cared for at all.

~/Flashback~

~I~

Those Germans know how to fight, the bastards… although I do admire their fighting techniques, the best challenge I've had in a while. Too bad I'll never get to tell them that, ha. They did wear me out even worse than Blondie could on a good day, though, looks like she has some competition. Oh well, it's over and done with now, and I've yet to even unpack my things, I might as well change out of these clothes they are pretty dirty.

I walked across my hotel penthouse suite to where my suitcase was positioned on a stand; I started to unzip it but realized that the zipper was stuck. I quickly began to tug at the damnable thing only to find out that it wasn't going to give up, and neither was I. With a grunt I lifted the oversized suitcase up and tossed it into the air, whipping my leg around I now kicked it towards the wall. Upon impact the suitcase exploded, my clothing going every which way, blanketing a portion of the floor with them.

As I made my way over to the clothing I caught a glimpse of something hiding under the corner of the overturned suitcase, kicking the suitcase the figure shot out from under it and across the suite's floor. I uncharacteristically shrieked at the sight of it, jumping backwards and beginning to panic. I quickly jogged over to the large fireplace, picking up a poker, taking a few practice swings with it before slowly creeping to where I could have sworn it went.

Suddenly at the other side of the room the curtains began to move like something was hiding behind them. My direction changed, now heading towards the said curtains a lump in my throat restricting both my ability to speak and my breathing. The figure could now be seen scurrying up the curtain; I raised the poker, waiting for the figure to reach to the top of them.

A loud knock at the door distracted me for a moment as my eyes shifted to the door, which was a mistake. As soon as my eyes left the curtain the figure lunged off the top of them, landing on my face and digging into it with what felt to be claws. I dropped the poker, clearly panicking, before my hands shot to the figure attached to my face, ripping it off while its claws left deep gashes. I growled, ready to kill the intruder the second I figure out what it is, once I got a good look at the thing in my hands I busted out laughing.

"So, it looks like the mystery as to where you went has been solved, eh?" I asked the pallid kitten as it tried to attack my hands to escape.

Ignoring the biting and scratching I walked to the door and opened it, one of my Crewl-Guards was there, "Ma'am I heard you screaming I just wanted to make sure you were-"

"I'm quite alright, you shouldn't worry about me." I dismissed the boy promptly, slamming the door shut; I went over to my bed and sat down to examine the feline.

The kitten was off-white, almost a tan from the looks of it; its ears were a reddish brown as was the socks on its feet, various places on its body and a patch of fur on its face. The area almost looked to be an eye patch; it covered its left eye entirely, it reminded me of the Little Rascal's dog to a degree. Its eyes were green like mine, the same shade exactly, they also had some type of a crust engulfing them, I'm amazed the little fluffball could even see to walk, let alone run like it did.

I carried the little rat into the bathroom, setting it down into the sink on a towel, the slick sides should keep it at bay. I then turned around and opened the cabinet behind me, digging though it to find a washcloth, after finding one I turned to wet it in the other sink beside the one the kitten was in. The rat didn't really struggle too much when I began to clean its eyes, it was only after I put the cloth down did the kitten react.

Its eyes were wide; as if this was the first time it had gotten a good look at the world around it, I wonder how it had gotten into such a state. The pet shop where I had bought it looked to be someplace that would provide Blondie with a quality pet, but it now looks as if I got her the runt of the litter. Even though she did out the rat herself I'm surprised she picked this one, knowing her she just liked how one of the markings looked or the like.

~/I~

Wade rocked in his chair slowly, trying to figure out the right choice of words he soon began, "You see after Kim returned with Ron we met up at his deserted diner, the majority of Middleton had been deserted actually, the population knew Shego would come after Kim. Anyways at the diner we began to talk-"

~Flashback~

"So what now?" Ron asked his two friends, a troubled look on his face; Rufus squeaked in agreement, the mole-rat then went back to sniffing around on the table top finding crumbs to eat.

Wade rubbed his temples in thought, glancing over at Kim ever so often; she was distant staring at some invisible object that seemed to be entertaining enough to keep her attention. The boy genius didn't answer the blonde boy's question immediately; it actually took him a few minutes, "I seriously do not know what to do, without Global Justice's resources we have nothing, they were my main supplier of the parts I needed to make things."

Ron slouched down, if even Wade didn't know then who did? He asked himself, not receiving an answer of course; the boy crossed his arms on the table and rested his head on them. Rufus sensed his owner was not his usual self, 'Naco?' the mole-rat squeaked, knowing food was the way to cheer him up.

"Whose cheese is that?" Kim suddenly perked up and asked, receiving confused looks from the boys before answering her own question, "That's Not-Cho Cheese!" the redhead giggled quietly.

Wade raised an eyebrow, "You alright Kim?"

The hero's laugh ceased as her face darkened, "I've just been beaten by my arch-nemesis, there is no way in hell we can stop her, I'm about to start my period and I haven't slept in days. So yeah, I'm just peachy."

Both boys subconsciously moved away from the hormonal redhead as her eyebrows furrowed, a grin spreading across her face, "Here's what going to happen…" the hero began, grabbing a napkin and stealing a pen from Wade's front shirt pocket, "since we cannot get close to Shego due to the security surrounding the Global Justice Headquarters we will need to flush her out there."

Kim started to sketch the basic blueprints of the base on the napkin, placing 'X's' in various places as markers, "We'll need to blow up the base, it will be the only way to get her out of there, she's accomplished too much for her just to screw up and expose herself."

Wade cut her off, "So what your suggesting is that we sneak in there and plant bombs on the main support beams of the base right?"

"Basically," she shrugged, "but I was thinking that some of us could barge in there to create a distraction. Preferably Ron, what's left of the Global Justice agents and myself."

~/Flashback~

"You probably know how well that went, I repaired her suit but we still almost died after the force-field-shield collapsed when Shego authorized the self-destruction of the lab. Something we didn't even remotely plan on." Wade started, "But enough of the past, I suppose you really want to know about Kim, and the Kim was that captured."

Bonnie was apparently confused, "There's a difference? Anne said that the DNA matched hers and her husband's you know, you can't really fake one of those tests."

"The tests may not lie but people do, did you ever take a look at the test? Anne used Shego's trust against her, lying about it to her face." Wade explained, "Now let me continue on about this whole sitch-"

~Flashback~

Kim collapsed onto the nearest table in the diner, it wasn't anything like her soft bed at home, but it wasn't like she cared right now, she was on the verge of passing out for the past few hours from fatigue anyways. The hero began to snore, unaware of the group that had followed her into the diner, of which included Ron, Wade, Doctor Director, and the remaining loyal Officers that had originally escorted Director to the redhead's ceremony. The group tiredly walked over to a couple of tables that had been pushed together, each of them trying to brush off some of the dust that had collected on them from the base's collapse.

"Woot! We got Shego to leave!" Ron enthusiastically cheered, only to receive dirty looks from the assembly.

Director calmly addressed the situation, "Ronald, I don't think you realize the extent of lives lost due to the base's self-destruction, many of the personal could not have escaped. We were lucky that Kimberly's shield held as long as it did, if it was not for Mr. Load's ingenuous craftsmanship we might have suffered the same fate as well."

Ron once again slumped down into his seat; he had not even thought about the officers that were left in the base, he was more concerned about saving their own lives at that moment. The assemblage was quiet for the longest time, no one dare to say anything from the tense mood of the room, to speak out of place would be the death of you it seemed. Finally the Director cleared her throat, it was obvious that she had given something some thought, all eyes were on her as she began.

"From how I am seeing this, Shego has this all thought out, she may just seem to be all brawn but the girl does have brains and it has become apparent she knows how to use them. We need to think of her as we do Kimberly, they are much alike in so many different ways, a few months ago Shego was brought in for terrorism as usual and we had a chat. That chat had got me thinking: 'why does she even work for Drakken?', when she would be capable and have a far better chance of taking over the world if she was to just work by herself."

"So with that said, I'm advising that we remain on our toes, we've seen what she has accomplished in less than twenty-four hours. If she is not stopped I would hate to think of what will happen to the world if this continues, so now here is my suggestion on how we should attack this-

Kim interrupted the Director, "So what do you suggest we do exactly? Our group is small, if try to attack we will be outnumbered probably fifty to one, those odds are not in our favors."

The group was wide eyed, they had not seen the redhead wake up and walk over to them at all, soon the Director spoke, "If you would let me finish?"

Kim nodded, leaning back on a table top as Director continued, "As I was saying, we need to figure out in what manner we will attack. And as Kimberly stated if we go for the physical approach we will most likely fail, actually an ice cube would probably have a better chance surviving in hell than we would taking on Global Justice." She paused, thinking for a moment, "So my suggestion is that we should try for a psychological approach on the subject, have someone get close to Shego and then turn the organization on her."

This time Wade spoke, "So what you're getting at is that one of us goes undercover and somehow befriends Shego, than afterwards turn the Officers on their own leader?"

"Exactly." Director stated, interlocking her fingers and resting her arms on the table.

The hero laughed, "How the hell do you expect one of us to get close to her? Make whoever a Government Hooker? Marilyn Monroe has us beat, you know."

Wade perked up, "That's not a bad idea, I know I read in Shego's file that was often found purchasing a prostitute whenever Drakken's base was near a large enough city. That's what most of her local arrests were for."

"Nose-Goes!" Ron cried, touching his nose, Rufus following suit, "there's no way I'm doing that…"

"You won't have too, Ronald." Director assured him hesitantly, "I've read her file as well, Mr. Load correct me if I'm wrong but I do believe that Shego preferred the company of a female."

Wade nodded in confirmation, looking at Kim with a devilish glint in his eye, the Director also engaged in that behavior, causing Kim to raise an eyebrow, "I'm not having sex with her! You guys are crazy, there is no way…"

"She has your parents you know." Ron added, knowing he was going to hit a heart string and have her hell-bent on vengeance.

Kim furrowed her eyebrows, "What will I need to do?"

The group now turned to Wade; he was the one that they expected to pull some elaborate plan out of his ass. Although now he was having a bit of trouble, there were a lot of lives on the line; their fate would be in his adolescent hands. For him to screw up would be the death of him, amongst who knows how many others?

"Give me until morning…" Wade requested, it would only give him a couple of hours but that would be better than the immediate response they were expecting now.

A few hours later the group returned to the table, back to their respective seats from the night prior, they conversed amongst themselves before a very tired boy genius appeared from the kitchen area of the diner. He had a piece of paper with him, he just laid the paper in front of the Director before taking a seat and drowsily looking at her. The boy shook his head before beginning to recite the small speech he had written on the paper the night before.

"We will need to acquire a couple of prototype hologram rings from my bedroom, the rings will allow for your physical appearance to be altered to whatever you want. With these rings Kim will be able to change her appearance drastically enough for her to go unnoticed. Now comes the biggest problem, 'How will we get Shego to notice Kim?', the only solution that I see working is to start up a business relationship with her, with prostitutes, this will mean that we will have to recruit some girls to do the job. If we can get her to trust the pimp enough we will soon be able to send in Kim after a while, being she will not expect anything."

As Wade started to actually fall asleep, Kim asked, "If there anything you can do so I don't remember any of this? I don't think I'll be able to live with myself…"

Wade shot up, eyes wide trying to wake up, replying after his face went back to normal, "Actually I was working on a ray to use on villains that would cause them to lose their memories, and thus we could turn them good."

"Would it work on me? I mean… would it be permanent?" the hero elaborated.

"Actually no, I could add in a setting to make it reversible. Think of it as a codeword and your memories would soon come back to you; I don't really know how long it would take probably a week at most, really."

~/Flashback~

Bonnie raised an eyebrow after the boy had explained the situation to her; she still didn't quite understand the whole thought process surrounding this, "This sounds a little half-baked; I mean you guys have had five years to make this work and it sounds as though you just half-assed worked on it from the beginning."

"I know, I know, but you have to understand the pressure that was riding on me. I'm the genius of this group; therefore I have to come up with most of everything, to be quite honest my brain is shot to hell." Wade replied, beginning to type on his keyboard, in his usual fashion.

"So how are we going to reverse the process? Didn't you mention a keyword?" the tanned girl inquired.

Wade said nothing, continuing to type on his computer, apparently lost in thought as he searched for something. The girl soon became annoyed; kicking his chair with a grunt of frustration, only to hurt her foot in the process for the boy was quite large thus the chair didn't move. She was about to stand up and knock some sense into him when the computer made a dinging noise, the boy pulled up a file with a single phrase on it: 'I Love You.'

"Why that, of all things?" Bonnie inquired.

"Why not? It would make sense, who on earth would tell that to her? Besides the person has to actually mean it, as in if her parents were to say it or even Ron. That was the fail-safe." The boy explained.

The tanned girl shrugged, it does make sense, who in their right mind would tell that to someone like her? Well like Blondie nevertheless, Kim was loved by everyone it seemed, it was just a given with the redhead. Another question popped into her head, "Why is Kim acting like this though… Wouldn't her personality stay intact?"

The genius thought for a moment, "Well you see, I erased certain memories of hers, and implanted some just so she would act a certain way. And you must keep in mind that our actions always affect us, so she is covering up her insecurities by being a loud and annoy brat, although there is a part of Kim still there she does seem to have some remnants of a brain in that head of hers."

Bonnie thanked Wade for his time, getting up to leave; once she informed Anne about this the shit was going to hit the fan.

Oh look I'm done, and this is sooo late… I couldn't figure out how to explain some things, so I just started to type and this is the outcome. If there is anything off please do tell me and I'll try to explain or just fix it.

I hope this wasn't too confusing, I wanted to show you guys what Kim was going through. I know you must be tired of hearing about Shego all the while.

Oh, Nose-Goes is a childish game that the last person to touch their nose has to do whatever the task maybe.