A big, long, important scene! Wait... aren't Romeo and Juliet public domain now? Do I even have to do a disclaimer?
Benvolio tells Mercutio they should go away before some Capulet sees them and starts a fight. Mercutio then teases Benvolio that, because of his eye color, Benvolio starts a bajillion fights. Um, what? Well, Tybalt shows up and politely asks where Romeo is. Mercutio and Benvolio respond to this ax-crazy by... teasing him. Okay, they're asking for it now. Thankfully, Romeo shows up looking like he's high, and Tybalt calls him a villain. Go Tybalt! Both pedophilia and drugs are very bad! But Romeo, being high (on love, btw, not cocaine), just tells Tybalt that, as Barney advises, we should all be FRIENDS. Tybalt laughs at this. Of course, laughing at someone who is both obviously criminally stupid and high is a TERRIBLE OFFENSE, so Mercutio decides to fight Tybalt. Romeo, trying to stop this, gets his biffle stabbed. Mercutio starts off saying he's fine, but then he DIES. This, btw, is when Mercutio famously says 'a plague a' both your houses!' In a FURIOUS RAGE, Romeo kills Tybalt. Damn. Of course, Benvolio then has Romeo FLEE before the Prince shows up and has him killed.
BTW, Mercutio was the Princes's beloved cousin. So, when he finds out that Tybalt died in revenge for Mercutio's death, he lowers Romeo's sentence from death to... BANISHMENT. DUHN DUHN DUUUUUUUUHN. End scene.
Yep. Long scene. And Romeo doesn't actually mention Barney, it's just funny to think of. Heh.