Ok just to clear up a few things that I realized in one of the earlier chapters I stated that Loki was a freshman, sorry that was a mess up. The party took place at the beginning of the school year. Loki, Raven, and Victor are sophomores. Logan and Tony are juniors and Thor, Fandral, Steve, Sif and all those guys are seniors.
ALSO! You know those commercials that play on the radio with all the foster kids asking for donations of coats and toys and such? Well they play every morning on my favorite station and every damn time all I can think of is Logan doing a commercial like that and I don't know whether to laugh hysterically or cry.
Thought you ought to know.
The next day actually started out pretty good. Loki woke up before everyone else and took a long hot shower then started getting ready in his room with the alternative station playing softly in the background. He lit a patchouli candle and smirked remembering how Tony had teased him for his so called hipster habits.
"Like he's any better with his Volvo car and voluminous hair" He muttered to himself, laughing lightly under his breath. He glanced in the mirror and froze at what he saw, he looked…the way he had before, before everything in his life went to shit.
His hair was curling from the shower and he pushed it aside impatiently, stepping closer to the full length mirror, his hand that held up his towel was shaking and he let it fall to the floor. His face….he looked happy. And not fake happy, like how he acted around his friends, but honestly, happy. His eyes were bright and a smile tugged at his mouth, he could think again. Oh the sadness wasn't gone, it had simply retreated for a short time, for a few minutes or maybe if he was lucky, a day. Just enough time for him to really see himself again, and remember how he used to be, it was amazing. Plots and ideas for causing havoc were swirling around in his head, his brain shrieking in relief that finally it got a break from all these depressing thoughts that it had had to deal with lately. He reached a hand out and caressed his reflection for a second, relishing in the joy he saw in himself.
But oh no now he could hear other alarms going off, his mother stirring in her bed and Thor's snores faltering as his annoying phone alarm beeped at him, time to go back in his box of sadness.
"It's been nice" he murmured to himself and his reflection nodded slowly, maybe they would see each other again someday.
"Back to reality" he whispered and turned up the radio, now was not the time to get lost in himself.
Tony pulled up outside of Loki's house and stared at it for a long moment, it was such a typical, upper middle class house that sometimes he couldn't believe that someone like Loki could live there. He grinned and turned the radio up, playing some alternative station that he didn't care about but he thought Loki would like. Because Tony was here to surprise him with coffee and a ride to school, wow is he a great guy or what? Oh and also because he wanted to kiss Loki today, not just on the cheek like he had been doing. He wanted to drive Loki to school and then he would park the car and when the teenager turned to him with a smile and a "thank you" he was going to summon up all the bravery he had and kiss him.
"Fuck am I terrified" he said and with his typical shit-eating grin plastered on to hide all of his inner confusion he opened the car door and stepped outside.
Loki was just finishing applying a bit of eyeliner, smudging it into his bottom lashes when the doorbell rang. He glanced up confused, maybe someone had come by to beg a ride from Thor? He nodded, yeah that was probably it, and knowing his brother he would agree without a second thought. That was Thor for you never caring about the consequences; as long as he could make a friend happy then he would be happy.
Unlike Loki, he was always thinking, weighing the pros and cons before he did anything, hell even loaning out a dollar was something he considered carefully for at least a few minutes before deciding.
"Loki honey!" his mother's sweet voice called him "Come in the kitchen please."
"One minute!" he shouted back, pausing a moment to lace up his riding boots and pull on his overcoat, snatching up his messenger bag and hurrying into the kitchen.
And there was Tony, sitting at his kitchen table with sleepy eyes and being handed a muffin by his mother. The older boy smirked at him. "Hey gorgeous"
Thor hated mornings, they sucked ass. Especially when he was woken up by first his annoying alarm and then his little brother's weird music. He pulled himself out of bed and grabbed the first sweatshirt and sweat pants he could find and tugged them on. Thor yanked his fingers through his tangled hair and headed out to the kitchen in search of something carb and meat loaded.
He stopped at the scene he saw in the kitchen, frozen to the spot. Loki was standing just a few steps in front of him, looking shocked at the dark haired teenager that he had gone out with on Saturday. Who…..who was currently being given a muffin and coffee by Frigga. The boy was smirking up at Loki, his eyes darting up and down his little brother's form obviously trying to get a rise out of the younger.
Loki laughed sharply and strode over to the table, making it seem as if he was going to lean in to hug Tony but stepping away at the last second and kissing his mother on the cheek.
"Oh hey can I get one of those?" Tony asked teasingly and Loki laughed mockingly "Why are you here Tony?" He questioned, the lift to his eyebrows and slight smile on his face taking the bite out of his words.
"This nice young man is going to give you a ride to school, isn't that sweet?" Frigga said, throwing a generous smile over her shoulder at the junior boy.
Loki sighed dramatically and swung himself into the seat next to Tony, stealing his coffee and taking a gulp out of it before declaring "And what if this nice young man, who you've only known for a minute I might add, was a serial killer? I barely know him myself mother, scarcely more than you do and yet you're intrusting my life to him?"
"Oh please, if he was a serial killer then you wouldn't have spent an hour chattering about your date with him while I was trying to read last night." Frigga grinned at the look of horror that crossed her youngest son's face and the blush that rose to his cheeks.
Thor had had enough, he thundered into the kitchen and gabbed a red bull from the fridge and started throwing some deli meat on a hunk of bread. He could feel the awkward silence that had descended and smiled inwardly 'Hah, if this guy thinks he's gonna sweep my little brother off his feet then he's got another thing coming.'.
"Hey your Thor right?" Tony asked, his voice carefully submissive and polite, Thor turned around just in time to see his brother smile encouragingly at the stupid looking junior next to him.
'I mean honestly, who has hair that big?' Thor thought to himself and then snickered inwardly, unable to stop the mean girl's quote that rose up in his head. 'That's why her hair is so big, it's full of secrets.' He smirked to himself, one of the few things that could always bring Loki and him together was bitchy girls on TV.
Tony's annoyingly charming grin was starting to piss Thor off, so he settled for not replying and simply eating his sandwich (meat and bread shoved in one hand and eaten at the same time does not mean it's a sandwich Thor) slowly, and keeping eye-contact the whole time.
Frigga sighed and patted Thor on the shoulder "Honey do try not to terrify the guests, Loki needs a ride to school and this boy has volunteered. We can't have you scaring him off now can we?"
"I could give him a ride" Shit he hadn't meant to let that slip out, those words so ridiculously possessive and vulnerable. Loki was watching him, eyes large and bright, trying to figure him out from behind that mask of eyeliner and concealer hiding the bruises under his eyes. Thor stared back at him frankly for a second, both not knowing what to say, both remembering how just a few days ago they had been laying in bed together, to close for it to be normal, whispering about things much too sad and heart wrenching. And it all came down to that quavering look hiding behind Loki's eyes for Thor. He would do things that seemed so wrong to the rest of the world; he would lie down and die for his baby brother if only he could be well again.
But….looking at him now, the oddness in his expression, the almost….hunger for something, that scared Thor to death. Just what was it that caused this off-ness about the person that he had thought he knew better than anyone else in the world?
"No" Loki said softly, getting up and slinging his bag over his shoulder, purposely breaking eye contact, wrenching his gaze away in almost harsh movement that was horribly difficult to look at. "Come on Tony" he said grabbing his hand and pulling the taller boy to his feet.
Tony smiled as if he had won the lottery (which he kind of had, imagine someone like Loki picking you over someone like Thor) and grabbed his half eaten muffin, waving it in a sort of goodbye to Frigga and completely ignoring Thor, who took a swig of red bull to hide the sudden pain behind his eyes and the way they watered.
As the door slammed shut Frigga turned to Thor, her eyes very round and thoughtful "Darling" she started in that soft, maternal voice that made him feel like he was 5 years old and wrapped in her arms again. He wished that he wasn't so big and old and he could hug her without being worried about what the rest of the world would think. "Darling" she said again, drawing his attention back to the here and now. "If you know something…something about why he's changed so much you…you would tell me right?"
"Oh course mother, I want to see him better just as much as you do." He said lying through his teeth for the first part and hoping the truthfulness of the second would drown out the guilt in his voice.
He regarded him for a few moments more and then just nodded slowly "Alright honey I trust you."
Thor smiled at her and grabbed his backpack from where it rested by the table "I should leave, wouldn't want to be late for engineering now would I?" she laughs like he'd hope she would at the sarcasm in his voice and kisses him on the cheek, patting his arm softly.
"Have a good day" he whispers, heading out the door and unable to keep from glancing back at her. Her bowed back, thin shoulders that slump inward and straggly dark hair that fell past her shoulders and down her back. He wished that he could make her happy again, when he and Loki were young and a good grade would make her whole day. One day he will make everything better. Mother will be happy, Father will stop drinking and they'll love each other again and…..and Loki will be fixed.
He will find out who hurt his brother and he will make everything good again. Then he and Loki will live happily ever after with none of those boys that followed Loki around with slack mouths and dazed eyes. No more Tony and Logan trailing after him like puppies following a prissy cat, just Loki and Thor. The way it should be.
Thor's hand's closed in fists around his keys and he smiled as the sharp edge cut into his palm. The pain cutting through any confusion he had ever had regarding Loki, no matter how strange it felt when the boy looked him over with narrow eyes or when his touch lingered much longer then it should have. Who would care about that when the sun was bright and crisp and his hand was smarting? Everything had become clear; he knew what he had to do.
"Fucking Mondays" Logan muttered to the dark haired boy beside him. Victor turned and smiled and the sun was so bright and clear that Logan almost wanted to look away, but he didn't. He didn't quite understand what it was about Victor, he was just always there. No matter what drama he was being pulled into Victor was always neutral and kind to everyone involved. Sure he was a perfectionist and sometimes could be a bit mental over proving himself right, but he understood his flaws; he tried to work past them any chance he got.
That was what Logan liked about Victor; he didn't hide in the past or in tears, he was always working desperately to be better. Shit now his mind was full of Loki again, Loki in tears, clinging at his shirt front as he cried over being unable to be what Logan wanted. Logan sighed and took a swig of the coffee that Victor had brought him, ignoring how closely the boy was staring.
Honestly he understood it; Loki was terrified of being romantically involved with someone that he had so much history with. Logan knew too much, he had seen him at his best and at his absolute worst. So Loki was scared of being that vulnerable with someone who already had so much power over him. That's why he was so crazy emotional over his brother. They were close, to close, and Loki sometimes would love that intertwining of the souls and sometimes it would terrify him. So Logan understood, he even got Loki's fascination with the new kid Tony. He had seen their friendship of Facebook and the way they were already posting videos on each other's walls and writing witty little comments back and forth, and he understood. Tony was new and different and they knew so little about each other. He was safe; there would be no real emotions, just teenage hormones. At least that's what Loki thought was going to happen.
Logan knew better, it was pretty hard not to fall for Loki, he knew that he had fought it for a long time before finally giving in. Giving in to those large, vulnerable eyes, mischievous smirk and the way he would hug him hello, thin arms wrapping around him. How protective Logan would feel when his arms were around Loki's waist, knowing that he knew him probably better than anyone else in the world.
Victor watched Logan as he disappeared into himself, thinking about Loki again. As much as Victor loved the guy it could get really annoying when Loki was all that anybody could think of, because he was just so beautiful and sad all the time. Victor sighed and touched the small scar on the side of his cheek. He could never be that beautiful, no one would notice him with his flawed appearance and nerdy personality. He wasn't sad enough, he couldn't cry gorgeously while clinging at some tall, muscular man, making people fall madly for him in an instant. The sophomore bit his lip and pulled himself up off the wall that he and Logan had been leaning against, snatching up his coffee and draining it. The bell would be ringing within a few minutes so he touched Logan's forearm gently.
"Logan get your head out of the Loki filled gutter, we've got school"
Said boy glanced towards him with a guilty look on his face. "Sorry what about Loki?"
Victor sighed "Oh come on already, I don't want to be late to Lehnsherr's class."
Logan followed him obediently, picking up the younger boy's backpack and handing it to him before finishing his black coffee and tossing the empty container to the ground carelessly. "Don't tell me you're following in Raven's footsteps and becoming obsessed with that guy."
The dark haired boy snorted and then blushed at what an unattractive sound that was. "As if, he kind of creeps me out actually. He's a little too nice to students. And you know he's given Raven rides home before?"
Logan whistled softly "What a weirdo. But Raven…I mean I know she has a crush on him but she's too smart to…" he trailed off
"I really don't know about her anymore." Victor said "Before this year I would have said that yeah she's way to intelligent to get caught up in some forbidden romance" the words were a sneer "but now….it's like the whole world has gone mad."
Logan wanted to touch him just then, not in the way he always wanted to touch Loki, hands shaking with the desire to comfort, but….he wanted to take Victor's hand and tell him that everything would be all right. Their friend's lives may be crumbling but they were the two sane ones; they would stay calm and keep each other steady through it all.
But that would be strange…..so he shoved his hand in his pocket, trying to ignore how it had twitched towards Victor's small pale hand with the silver ring around his thumb. "We're not mad" was all he said in response to the sudden sadness in his friend's voice. And it seemed to be the right thing to say because Victor turned to him and grinned, the sunlight reflecting off the scar on his cheek, and again Logan could hardly look at him. The sun was too bright, Victor's smile to wide, his eyes shone, it was too much happiness to handle. Sadness he understood, this bright, perfectionist of a little genius was uncharted territory.
The car ride was largely silent, the radio playing softly in the background as Loki stared out the window and Tony drove, his dark eyes darting over to the younger teen whenever he thought he wouldn't notice.
"Something on your mind?" Tony asked quietly, unsure how exactly to open the boy up, before it had seemed pretty easy, the conversation had flowed easily between the other times they had hung out but now Loki seemed almost….confused about something.
The paler boy seemed not to hear him; instead he turned towards Tony with a question mark on his face. "Why do you know this area so well? You can navigate it perfectly like you've lived here your whole life and yet you just came to this school."
Tony grinned "You are ridiculously smart." He savored the blush that stained Loki's cheeks and continued. "And completely right, I was homeschooled for a long time but I terrorized my tutor so much that he finally quit and father was too annoyed with me to bother hiring a new one. So he told me, its public school or the army. I like to think I choose the better option, there's no Loki's in the army."
Said boy smiled softly but then he thought over what Tony had said and the smile dropped off his face. "Your father…..he sounds….like mine."
"What's yours like?" Tony asked, turning into the school parking lot and glancing over at him quickly.
Loki had his hands in a loose pile on his lap, he was staring down at them so his overgrown black hair fell forward, hiding his expression. Tony allowed his gaze to linger on the way his hair swept across his neck, the way it was curling slightly against the collar of his shirt.
"My….my father, he used to be alright, I mean he ignored me but that was alright because I had mother. Thor was always his favorite. But then he lost his job and started drinking….a lot. and now…he works poor mother to the bone taking care of the whole family and he just sits around and yells at all of us."
"I'm sorry, that's horrible" Tony said, parking the car and reaching over to touch Loki's hand, but he turned to him not with the sadness that he would have expected but a bright, obviously fake smile. Well, he certainly couldn't kiss him now, not with Loki baring his heart to him and being so vulnerable. He wouldn't want him to think that he was trying to take advantage of him.
"It's fine, come on then we don't want to miss anymore classes do we?"
Tony nodded, allowing Loki to slip back into the fakeness, and smile and joke with him, though really all he wanted was to see the true, real Loki, the one who his mother loved and his brother was so protective over. And he wished that he had told Loki all of it, everything about his past. The shitty person that he used to be, the girls, alcohol, drugs, parties, everything about him, just so Loki would understand. Just how different he had become, and how different he was willing to be for him.
It was during lunch that the day started to get confusing for Victor. He and Raven were sitting at their table, picking at the disgusting school lunches and talking about what they would do during the weekend when Logan came over. He smiled at Victor, which surprised the sophomore so much that he could barely stutter out a hello and Raven obviously noticed that because she raised her eyebrows at him, a little smirk twisting her lips. Then Loki walked up, with someone new.
"This is Tony guys, he's a new kid."
Victor glanced over at Logan immediately, trying to see how he would take it. For Loki to be walking so close and smiling so much obviously meant that this was someone he cared about. 'That must be why Logan's been so out of it lately.' He thought 'probably saw them together or something.'
He really wanted to yell at Loki for breaking Logan's heart so carelessly and often, but he knew it would do no good. Loki probably wasn't even aware of just how much Logan loved him. He probably just assumed it was a little crush, something meaningless and based purely on looks. Because that was the way Loki thought, he never thought anyone could like him for who he was.
"Hey I'm Victor" he smiled easily at the tall, good-looking kid with puppy dog eyes. A little too skinny for his tastes, though that bed head hair, he had to admit, was adorable.
"I'm Raven" the girl piped up, batting her eyelashes at him. Tony grinned at her and Victor, obviously pleased that he had gotten a response.
Logan stayed silent and before Loki could get pissed at him Victor laughed good naturedly "And tall, dark, and brooding over here is Logan. Don't mind him; he's just plotting how to bomb the school."
Tony laughed and matched Victor's charming smile with one of his own. "I see" and Victor could tell that he did see, just how complex and twisted Loki and Logan's relationship was. Anyone but Loki saw the way Logan looked at him, with love spilling out of his eyes. So this guy was intelligent, and liked Loki, and was ridiculously good looking. But so was Logan. 'Ohhh this will defiantly get fun' he thought, laughing to himself evilly, though he hated to think of Logan getting hurt everyone liked some good drama right? He glanced over at Raven and from her eyes, dancing with suppressed laughter he could tell she was thinking the same thing.
But then everything got strange. Loki and Tony were sitting down and talking and laughing over something when he noticed that the smile had slid off Loki's face, he was staring off into the distance. His eyes fixed on something, and then he got up abruptly, touching Tony's shoulder lightly. "Sorry, um….I just…..I'll be right back alright?"
Tony nodded, his dark eyes concerned, and even Logan was looking up and watching Loki walk towards the exit, his expression confused.
"Well shit" Logan said abruptly, he was glaring at Tony "I swear if you do anything to him I will personally destroy you." there was no humor or lightness in his voice. This was not the tone of a best friend looking out for their friend, this was a seriously dangerous guy in love who would kill who ever hurt the one they loved.
"I won't" Tony's voice was just as serious, the grin was gone from his face and he stared right into Logan's eyes with an intensity that had Victor and Raven scooting away. "I will never do anything to hurt him." he said, obviously changing around Logan's words.
Logan leaned forward, his leather jacket bending at the elbows as he crossed his arms and stared at Tony. "You know if you hurt him I'll take him away and I won't give him back."
Tony smiled sadly "If I hurt him, I'll give him to you. Because I'll know that I don't deserve him."
Loki had seen the blonde ponytail like a beacon, a terrible, disgusting beacon. Fandral had caught his eye and jerked his head towards the exit of the cafeteria with a short, possessive, little motion. He hated it but still he got up and headed outside. What other choice did he have, it was either Fandral did whatever he had planned here, in a public place or he went over to Loki's house on the pretense of seeing Thor and cornered him there.
He got to the exit and pushed it open, very aware of eyes watching him. He didn't know if they were Tony's, Logan's, or Fandral's, or all three. He got outside and leaned against the brick wall of the school. It was mostly empty here, but there was a busy street and some people walking dogs not far away, surely nothing to bad could happen right?
The door opened and the Fandral slipped through. He threw Loki a superior smirk and rattled a ring of keys that he had dangling from his finger, locking the door. "Did you know that the janitor leaves his office unlocked quite often?" he asked, slinking close to Loki, backing him up until he was practically plastered against the wall.
"What do you want now?" Loki asked, his voice shaking, he couldn't seem to control it when Fandral was around, he was like a defenseless child.
The blonde man snickered "Babe, I saw you with that boy you know. Whoever said that my plaything could have one of his own?"
Loki said nothing; it was hard enough not to be sick right then and there.
"I allowed you to mess with that Logan boy's head. I knew you would never do anything with him no matter how much he wanted it; you could care less about him. But this Tony…you actually like him don't you? You want to do things with him that you've only ever wanted to do with your brother."
"No…..I….I don't….I just…." He trailed off, Fandral was trailing his fingers down his stomach, teasing at his belt, and it felt like poison to Loki.
"Whoever said my plaything could have one of his own?" Fandral repeated, smiling. "Come now Loki, you have an imagination don't you? Pretend again, I could be anyone you wanted me to be."
"No" the darker boy whispered, trying desperately to sound dominant, remote, it didn't work. "Please, just let me have Tony. It helps…..I forget about…about…"
"About being in love with your brother?"
Loki swallowed hard against the lump in his throat and slowly nodded. "Yes"
Fandral laughed sharply "Disgusting" he bent and kissed Loki, his tongue invading his mouth. Loki moaned, not in passion but like a sort of warning growl, a message that they were in a public place and he could always scream. Fandral moved back, smirk still firmly in place "Oh please, you wouldn't do anything, I could kiss you in front of the whole school and you would stay quiet. Because I would tell them before you could say a single word against me."
"Will you let me have Tony?" he asked, quietly, praying to whatever god was out there that Fandral would have mercy on him just this once.
"What do I get in return?" the blonde asked, his eyebrows high on his forehead and a sleazy smile hanging lazy on his face.
Loki felt blood rush to his face and he hung his head, letting his hair fall forward to hide his red cheeks. "What do you want?" he asked voice so quiet that Fandral had to lean closer to hear. And Loki hated himself right then, feeling so used and slutty, it was revolting.
The older teen snickered "Oh Lo-ki what do you think I want babe?"
Oh poor Loki, I'm a horrid person. Sorry this took so long but I hope all that angst and Logan made up for it. I realize that Victor was rather ooc but i like my weirdo little Victor, he's cute. The plot is thickening guys; I'm thinking only a few chapters left. Though I am defiantly considering making a sequel, so click that little author alert button if you are interested in that at all!
Reviews are love!