A/N: This chapter really gave me fits as it came into existence. Nothing I wrote seemed to sound quite right, especially since we're nearing the end of one phase of the story. These transition periods are always the hardest, I think. I know where we're going, but it's still quite a bit off in the future, so we've got to deal with the here and now first, and that's not always easy! I hope you enjoy what I ended up with. And for my U.S. readers, happy Labor Day! I hope everyone is enjoying a relaxing three-day weekend!
"Well, I see you survived a night with my family," Derek said as he walked into their bedroom to find Meredith sitting up in bed, a book open in her lap. "Any injuries I should know about?"
"I think we all survived unscathed," Meredith smiled.
"I'm glad to hear it," Derek said happily, smiling back at Meredith as he opened the dresser drawer to pull out his pajamas. "What exactly did you ladies do tonight?"
"Ha," Meredith scoffed. "Like I'd tell you."
"They got to you already?" Derek asked in disappointment. "You know, one of these days someone is going to cave and tell me what happens at these dinners."
"Maybe," Meredith said coyly. "But it won't be tonight, and it won't be me."
"Now, that's just not nice," Derek pouted playfully as he climbed into bed next to Meredith. "I thought we weren't supposed to keep secrets."
"It's not exactly a secret, it's more of a withholding," Meredith said. "You're just mad because Addison would never tell you and now I won't either."
"Can you blame me for being curious?" Derek asked. "I have all these images in my head of some secret society with names signed in blood."
"You have an overactive imagination," Meredith said, closing her book and placing it on the bedside table before turning to look at Derek.
"What?" Derek asked as he noticed the look on her face.
"We never did talk about what happened this morning," Meredith said. "And I believe I promised you that the conversation most definitely wasn't over."
"This morning?" Derek asked innocently.
"You talked to Mark about our sex life, Derek," Meredith reminded.
"Right, that," Derek said guiltily. "Meredith, I'm sorry. I had no idea Mark was going to be so stupid as to blurt it out in front of my entire family. I never would have talked to him if I had thought for one second that he would do something like that."
"I just don't see why you had to talk to him at all," Meredith said. "I mean, have you always made it a habit to walk around talking about your sex life to everyone?"
"It's not everyone, just Mark," Derek said. "Other than the whole period when he slept with Addison, that's how it's always been with Mark and I. I honestly didn't think it was that big of a deal."
"I guess it shouldn't be," Meredith agreed. "Although, in the future, do you think you could please get Mark to keep his mouth shut if you're going to tell him something private like that?"
"Oh trust me, Mark will be hearing quite a lot about privacy," Derek assured her. "So, are we okay?"
"I don't know," Meredith said thoughtfully. "Did you talk to Mark because you were frustrated? I know asking you to wait is hard for you, especially when I can't tell you when I'll be ready. Is that why you talked to Mark? Are you angry because we're waiting?"
"What? No, of course not," Derek insisted. "I talked to Mark because it just felt natural, that's the relationship we have. I'm not angry, Meredith. I'm not saying I necessarily like waiting, but I'm not angry."
"I'm sorry it's taking so long," Meredith said softly.
"Meredith, whatever it is, it's okay," Derek assured her. "I know I've pressured you in the past, but I'm not doing that now. There is so much more to our relationship than just sex. Not that the sex wasn't always good, because it was, but that's not why I love you. So whatever's holding you back, you take your time figuring it out, because I'll still be here when you're ready."
"It's just, you still look at me like you did before the crash," Meredith said. "But I don't look like that anymore, Derek. And I'm so afraid that when you really see what my body looks like now, you won't look at me the same way."
"Meredith, I could never see you as anything other than absolutely gorgeous," Derek said.
"You say that, but you've only seen my body once since the accident," Meredith insisted. "You can't pretend that didn't shock you, either. I know it did. There are so many scars, Derek, and I can't ask you to just pretend you don't see them."
Derek sighed as he reached over to brush a strand of hair out of Meredith's face. "Look, Meredith, I won't lie to you, it was a bit of a shock when I first saw the scars," he said softly. "But then I thought about it…and so what if you don't look exactly the same? You're still beautiful, Meredith, and those scars are a part of that beauty now. Those scars are a reminder that you're still here."
"What do you mean?" Meredith asked in confusion.
"When you were in that crash, I almost lost you," Derek said. "I almost lost you forever. We came so close to not having this chance, to not getting one more opportunity to get it right. The fact that you are here, that we're here right now, that we do have this chance, well, that's an amazing thing, Mer. It doesn't matter how much things may have changed, I still think you are beautiful and there isn't anything that could ever change that."
"It's one thing to say that now," Meredith sighed. "I just need more time to get myself used to the idea of someone else seeing them."
"And like I said, I want you to take whatever time you need," Derek said. "I can wait."
"Of course, that's not to mention the fact that I can't do a lot of the things I used to do," Meredith continued. "I can't even reach down to touch my toes, Derek. My flexibility is completely shot. What if the sex isn't as good as it used to be? What if I've made you wait all this time and it's not any good?"
"Meredith, do you really think the reason we were so good together was just because you were flexible?" Derek asked. "Because I'm not saying that hurt, but that wasn't even close to the reason. Mer, we're good together because we are so completely and totally in love. That's something that no crash is going to take away from us. I don't care if you can't do half the things you used to do, in bed or out of it."
"You don't?" Meredith asked in disbelief.
"I don't," Derek agreed. "And you know what? When you're ready, it'll be a chance for us to get to know each other all over again. We'll figure out new things, things we probably never would have thought of before. I can be very creative, you know."
"Oh, can you now?" Meredith giggled.
"You have no idea, Dr. Grey," Derek teased, leaning in to kiss her softly. "No idea."
"Well then," Meredith smiled up at Derek. "We are definitely not doing this here, because our first time cannot be in your mother's house. But when we get back to Seattle, I may just ask you to prove that, Dr. Shepherd."
"Uncle Derek!"
Meredith slowly opened her eyes the next morning to find three eager young faces staring at her from the edge of the bed. She smiled as she reached over and jabbed Derek in the side.
"What the…" Derek groaned at being awakened so early on his vacation.
"You've got visitors, Derek," Meredith said, nodding her head in the direction of the children.
"Uncle Derek, you have to get up," the young boy pleaded, while the two girls eagerly nodded.
"My mommy says we can tickle you if we have to," one of the girls giggled. "She said you're very ticklish, Uncle Derek."
"Amelia, your mother is a liar," Derek said defensively. "Now, why do I have to get up so early?"
"Uncle Derek, if you don't get up, we won't get to eat," Amelia said, as though it were the most obvious thing in the whole world. "Grandma says the bakery is only open until ten today!"
"That's cause it's a holiday, Uncle Derek," the boy said.
"Is that right?" Derek asked in mock surprise. "Why didn't you say so sooner, Connor?"
"Uncle Derek, hurry up!" the other little girl pleaded. "You have to take us to the bakery!"
"Emma, who told you I was taking you to the bakery?" Derek asked.
"Mommy," Emma said. "And Aunt Kathy, too."
"Aunt Abby and Grandma said so too," Connor added. "And Aunt Nancy said if we don't go really, really early, Mr. Reilly will sell all his donuts before we get there!"
"Aunt Nancy told you that, did she?" Derek sighed.
All the three children quickly nodded in agreement, their faces conveying just how urgent they found their mission to be.
"Fine, fine, I'm going," Derek groaned as he eased himself out of the bed. "Just give me a few minutes, okay?"
Derek shook his head as he walked into the bathroom, muttering about how he was going to kill his sisters when he woke up enough to think clearly.
Meredith couldn't help but giggle as she looked over at the three children still standing by her side of the bed.
"Hey guys, did Aunt Nancy happen to tell you what time you should go to the bakery?" Meredith asked.
Emma nodded. "She said we should make sure Uncle Derek leaves by seven!"
"Well, it's already 6:30," Meredith whispered conspiratorially. "Maybe you'd better go make sure Uncle Derek didn't fall asleep in the bathroom. You wouldn't want to miss those donuts, I hear they're really good."
"You've never had Mr. Reilly's donuts?" Connor asked, his mouth falling open in genuine shock as Meredith shook her head. "We'll bring you a jelly one, they're the best!"
"Uncle Derek!" the two girls screamed as they banged on the bathroom door. "Uncle Derek, hurry up, hurry up, please hurry up!"
"I'm coming," Derek grumbled as he opened the door. "Are you little monsters ready to go?"
All three children nodded as they rushed toward the door.
"Now, why doesn't Meredith have to get up too?" Derek asked them.
"Mommy said to let her sleep in," Amelia said. "Don't worry, Uncle Mark's coming so you have a friend, too!"
"And just who's getting Uncle Mark out of bed?" Derek asked. "Because you know Uncle Mark is very hard to wake up in the morning."
"That's why Mommy said we get you up and the bigger kids could Uncle Mark," Connor said. "Trisha said she'd jump on his tummy if she had to!"
"So, how did you all avoid bakery duty?" Meredith asked as she walked into the living room to find Sean, Tom and Matt lounging on the couches.
"Ah, well, we've had it for several years straight while Derek and Mark were off doing whatever they were doing in Seattle," Matt said. "So we figured it was their turn to share in the fun. I hope the kids didn't wake you up this morning, though."
"I specifically told them to be quiet," Sean added.
"Sean, you sent three six year old kids into my room with instructions to do anything necessary to wake Derek up," Meredith said. "On what planet does that ever lead to quiet children?"
"Sorry," Sean said sheepishly. "On the plus side, you're up before any of the girls, so you can have first dibs on breakfast."
"Do you all have donuts every year?" Meredith asked.
"Donuts and the parade are a tradition," Tom said. "Everyone watches the parade. I'm sure even you've watched it at some point."
Meredith bit her lower lip as she glanced down at the floor.
"Oh my God, you've never seen the parade?" Sean asked incredulously.
"Who's never seen the parade?" Nancy asked as she and Nick walked into the room.
"Meredith, apparently," Tom said.
"How can you have never seen the parade?" Nancy asked. "It's an American tradition, Meredith. Next thing you know, you'll be telling us you've never actually had the traditional turkey Thanksgiving dinner."
Again, Meredith bit her lip and stared hard at her hands in her lap.
"You've never had Thanksgiving dinner," Sean breathed in disbelief. "Were you raised in a foreign country?"
"Boston," Meredith said.
"So, how exactly have you never had Thanksgiving?" Nick asked.
"Well, my mother wasn't into holidays," Meredith said. "She just thought it was all a big waste of time and money, so we never celebrated them. After I left home, I was mostly on my own for the holidays, and really, what's the point of doing Thanksgiving for one? Plus, I can't cook at all, so it wouldn't have been pretty even if I'd tried."
"So you've never actually had Thanksgiving?" Nancy asked. "You never went home with a friend for the holidays or anything like that?"
"I did go home with my friend Mike a few times," Meredith recalled. "Two Thanksgivings, if I remember correctly. But that was always very, very awkward, so we were both pretty much drunk off of our asses by two or three in the afternoon. My roommate Izzie tried to have Thanksgiving two years ago, when I was still settling in Seattle, but I blew that off for work."
"Drunk by two?" Beth asked skeptically.
"Mike was a closet gay man who dragged me home with him to pose as his girlfriend so his mother would stop trying to set him up," Meredith said. "I hadn't even been there half a day and the woman was already picking out colors for our wedding. Trust me, there was cause for drinking."
"Is this the same Mike who got you the World Series tickets?" Nancy asked.
"One and the same," Meredith agreed. "Like I said, he owed me big time."
"Mark, get your filthy paws away from those cookies!" Maggie scolded as she, her daughters and Derek all bustled around the kitchen that afternoon. Meredith laughed from her place at the counter, where she and Beth's daughter Clara had been put in charge of snapping the ends off of the green beans.
"I'm just testing to make sure they're not poisonous, Mom," Mark protested. "I wouldn't want anyone to get sick."
"I'm sure you wouldn't," Maggie said. "But the only one who'll be hurting will be you if I catch you anywhere near my desserts again. You know the rules. Dinner, then dessert, not the other way around."
"Nancy was eating cookies earlier," Mark protested. "How come she can eat cookies but I can't?"
"Nancy is growing my grandbaby inside of her," Maggie pointed out. "When you can say the same about yourself, then you can have cookies before dinner too. Until then, back away from the sweets. Have an apple if you're that hungry."
"That's gender discrimination," Mark pouted. "That's not fair."
"No, what's not fair is that in a few months time, my entire wardrobe is going to have to be replaced," Nancy said. "I'm going to be the size of a house, and then I'm going to have push something the size of a bowling ball out of my vagina. You really want to trade?"
"I see you're already looking forward to the birthing process," Kathleen laughed. "As on OB, shouldn't you know all the tricks to making it go faster?"
"Need I remind what it was like when I had the boys?" Nancy asked. "We can't all be as lucky as you were."
"Why was she lucky?" Meredith asked.
"Kathleen's longest labor lasted ten hours," Beth said.
"When she had Nicole, that baby was out in three pushes," Nancy said in mock disgust. "Three freaking pushes."
"Nancy, on the other, has had the worst labor of any of us," Abby said. "You should really warn the hospital staff this time, though, Nancy. Remember, you've still got to work with those L&D nurses. I think you scared a few off when you had Brian."
"Hey, I was in labor for 34 hours," Nancy pointed out. "After about 12 hours, you can't hold a woman responsible for anything that comes out of her mouth. I think they all understood I was a teensy bit out of my mind by the time I started screaming obscenities at them."
"34 hours?" Meredith asked in disbelief.
"I went 37 with Karl," Nancy said, grimacing at the memory. "All while my wonderful ex-husband was out on the golf course…or so he said, at any rate."
"That's right, he wasn't there," Kathleen said. "He wasn't there with Brian either, was he? What was he doing then?"
"Ah, by that point I believe it wasn't what he was doing, but rather who he was doing," Nancy said. "At least I know I won't have to worry about that this time."
"So Nick's actually going to be there?" Derek asked.
"Of course he is," Nancy said indignantly. "What, you think he's just going to walk away or something?"
"Nance, don't take this the wrong way, but that's exactly what he did," Maggie said. "I think we're just all concerned that you've forgiven him a little too easily. You aren't simply taking him back because of the baby, are you?"
"Forgiven him?" Nancy asked, a bit shocked at her family's assumption that she hadn't been at fault.
"Of course," Beth said. "After all, he's the one who just up and left without any warning, Nancy. I'm sure you think you're doing the right thing, but how can you be sure he's not going to do that again?"
"Is he even safe to be around a baby?" Abby asked. "I mean, disappearing like that, it could be a sign of some sort of mental instability. Isn't that right, Kathy?"
"Oh, um, I don't really think…" Kathleen stammered, caught off guard by the way she was dragged into the conversation.
Nancy shook her head and laughed slightly. "Nick didn't just up and leave," she said slowly. "He had his reasons. Just because Karl and Brian didn't see it coming doesn't mean there wasn't a reason."
"Nancy…" Maggie said cautiously.
"It wasn't his fault, you know," Nancy continued. "You guys are treating him like a pariah or something, which is really sweet, it is, and I appreciate how protective you all are being of me, but it's not right. Because what happened, Nick leaving, the almost-divorce, all of it…that wasn't his fault, it was mine."
"Yours?" Beth asked.
"Mine," Nancy agreed. "The idea that somehow I took him back, that I forgave him, well, it's all backwards. All this time, I've been waiting for him to forgive me, because I was the one who was wrong. I'm the one who almost screwed up the best relationship I've ever had. Me, not Nick."
"Nancy, what happened?" Maggie asked.
"It's a long story," Nancy sighed. "But, it's in the past now. Nick and I, we're working through it. But I need you guys to stop treating him like he's some sort of horrible person, because you've got it all wrong. We're working things out, and with any luck, we're going to be a family for a long time to come, so you all need to accept him again."
"It really wasn't his fault?" Maggie asked.
"It wasn't," Nancy nodded.
"But you're not going to tell us what actually happened?" Maggie asked.
"Not today, no," Nancy said.
"Why not?" Derek asked.
"Because it isn't exactly a happy, feel-good story," Nancy said. "And today, we're supposed to be happy, remember?"
"What is it Uncle Joe always says at times like this?" Beth asked.
"I believe you're referring to, 'It's a holiday, damn it, you have to at least pretend to be happy to be here!'" Derek laughed, his voicing deepening in imitation of his father's older brother.
"Hey, you know what would make me really happy right now?" Mark asked mischievously.
"No cookies, Mark!" Maggie scolded, playfully swatting Mark's hand away from the plates once again. "Now make yourself useful and come take the turkey out of the oven so I can baste it."