No matter how hard I try, you fear the beast inside
It's growing, it's waiting
Just to hurt you
The couple lounge on Shepard's large bed, surrounded by the Normandy's ambiance. Thane loses himself in memories, her smile and laughter overwhelming his senses. It helps to focus on something other than the sharp pains stabbing up and down his body. Shepard's content to watch his expressions as he escapes into solipsism, his upturned lips bringing a soft smile to her own. When he keeps silent like this, it drives her crazy with curiosity. The need to know what he's remembering dominates her.
As she studies him, her focus lands on how very sick he looks. He always seems so strong, so healthy. Watching him fight, it's nearly impossible to tell that he has a terminal illness. That made it easy for Shepard to push his disease to the dark, unventured recesses of her mind. Seeing him like this, the reality comes flooding back, dragging the oh-so delightful fear with it.
Willing the thoughts to go away, she pulls the tingly drell into her arms. She needs to feel his warmth, sense his chest rise and fall with every breath. His head settles over her heart, the steady rhythm calming his breathing. His eyes flutter open, instantly meeting her gaze. The discomfort begins to slowly pull away from his fingers and toes, ghosting up his arms and legs. He knew the episode wouldn't last, but he can't help but muse to himself that it ended much sooner than he had expected it to. It must've had something to do with Shepard's presence... The hope that she brings with her everywhere she goes.
"You look distressed, siha." Thane mutters before glancing at his hands, slowly trying to ball them into fists. Pain shoots up his arms, but he ignores it and continues his little exercise.
"We're not making as much progress on the cure as I'd like us to." She watches his hands as well, amazed by how quickly he's regaining his mobility.
"Of course not. You'd like it to be done." He forces his body to endure the pain, wanting to hold her hands or caress her face. Her hand is closer, his clumsily wrapping around it. Invisible knives prick up his arms to his shoulders, but are ignored by the stubborn drell. The emotions blazing in his siha's eyes are too much for him to endure, nothing matters more than easing her burden.
"You're laying here in pain, trying to make me feel better. I think we have it a little backwards." She chuckles, the noise soothing Thane. He pauses for a second, replaying her words in his mind. She knows he's in pain? He's trying so hard to hide it, and she can see right through the effort. He's not sure how he feels about that.
"You make everyone want to be more like you. I guess I'm not immune to your charms." Shepard feathers a finger down the length of the sensitive skin fusing his middle and ring finger, earning a shiver from the assassin resting against her. The motion sends a wave of white-hot pain over his body, like thousand of needles poking his flesh. She sighs, not able to fight off the thoughts of the Reapers. The lives of many, soon to rest on her shoulders. And she's struggling to save one man who is dear to her.
"If I can't save you, Thane... How can I save everyone from the Reapers?" The agony and doubt are thick in her voice, and she finds herself unable to look him in the eye. He thinks his response over carefully, knowing he should tread lightly.
"I've told you before that I've known for a long time that I was going to die. I accepted it, I was ready. When you spend so many years with the belief that something is going to happen soon, it's hard to believe anything may stop it. You've convinced me that you're going to do just that." He squeezes her hand gently, thrilled that it doesn't hurt this time. "Siha, look at me." He hooks a shaky finger under her chin and guides her gaze back to his. She surveys his expression for a second, unsure of what it means, before he touches his forehead to hers. A human way of expressing trust, it makes her heart skip a beat.
"Thanks." She whispers, their position awakening desire that had been overshadowed by negativity for so long. She snakes a hand to the back of his head before pressing her lips against his. There's no fighting for dominance, the kiss is more passionate than lusty. His hands fly up to her face, thumbs caressing the soft flesh of her cheeks. The need for oxygen arises, breaking the sweet kiss way too soon.
"You're going to cure me. And then you're going to save me again, when the Reapers attack. I believe in you, siha-" He barely finishes the sentence before her hot mouth is on his again. His conscience chastises him, reminding him that his body isn't in its best condition. But, her teeth raking against his bottom lip makes his conscience disappear. His tongue laps at her bottom lip, but her mouth remains tightly closed. He growls, using his strength to pin her against the bed, hands held tightly in his above her head.
"I have a lot to get you back for..." He whispers in her ear, tongue darting out to pull an earlobe into his warm mouth. He worries the flesh between his teeth, earning a gasp from the woman underneath him. He skillfully shifts both of her hands into one of his, giving himself a free hand to roam with. It finds the hem of her shirt, slipping underneath to rest flat against her toned midsection. His mouth comes crashing down onto hers, giving up on any restraint he thought he had. Her body aches for more of his touch, arching her back off of the bed to get closer to him. His hand moves to her hip, pushing her back down in one swift motion and earning a soft whimper of protest.
"Shepard, Mordin wishes to see you." Thane narrows his eyes at the sound of EDI's voice, reluctantly pulling away from his siha's lips.
"Is it important?" She asks, hoping the AI will ignore how breathy she sounds.
"Yes." Is EDI's short response, eliciting an annoyed sigh from the Commander. EDI's blue shape disappears from her post, satisfied that she has done her job. And finding some amusement in the anger she heard in Shepard's voice.
Down in the lab, Mordin tries his hardest to talk himself out of the situation. He's now facing the intruder, an unknown drell. Guns are drawn, but he knows Shepard wouldn't be happy if he killed the young drell.
"Don't want to hurt you." Mordin reassures, making no move to turn this into a fight. The intruder laughs.
"I can't say the same, Professor." The deep undertones of his drell voice ring through the room.
"Guns down, both of you." Shepard orders from the door, features fierce as she takes in the scene before her. Mordin puts his gun away, but the drell continues to point his at the Commander.
"Commander Shepard?" The intruder asks, the severity of his decision to invade the Commander Shepard's ship finally weighing on him. Shepard takes a moment to admire the vibrant red tint of his skin, the frills of his neck a deep grey. She's never seen such a bright shade of red, especially not on a living thing.
"Welcome to the Normandy. I admit, I'm at a disadvantage. I don't know who you are." The drell gives up, dropping his gun to the floor. He has so many questions, but now he's not sure he'll make it out alive.
"For my sake, that's a good thing. I... didn't realize this was your ship." His voice falters, wringing his hands together nervously.
"Relax. I'm not going to hurt you. Perhaps you're lucky this is my ship, anyone else would shoot first and ask questions later." She smiles brightly at the young drell, hoping to earn his trust. He reminds her of a wounded puppy, wide eyes begging for mercy. The sight is heart-wrenching.
"Perhaps... Will you answer my questions, Commander?"
"Only if you answer mine, too." She crosses her arms across her chest, leaning her weight on the wall behind her.
"What did you take from the lab? And why?" The confusion is written all over his face, a sign that he's new to this. He slipped onto the ship undetected, she'll give him that. But he seems to lack training in other areas.
"Samples of the cure that the hanar are working on. And Kepral's Syndrome bacteria samples. Because I want someone that isn't a hanar to take a turn working on the cure. Mordin's brilliant, I'm sure he'll see things the hanar keep missing." Her words are full of truth, even his untrained ears can hear that.
"Why do you want to help?" He's becoming more uneasy by the second, knowing that this woman could tear him apart. More unnerving is the fact that she seems to have no desire to do so. Why? He's getting tired of hearing that word escape his mouth.
"A drell that is dear to me has Kepral's Syndrome." She replies matter-of-factually, making the information fall into place in his mind.
"I... had the completely wrong idea." He hangs his head, ashamed of himself. Shepard's attention lands on Mordin, who is listening quietly.
"It happens, don't beat yourself up about it. It's time for my questions, though. Come with me." He obliges, thinking to himself that he doesn't really have a choice. He doesn't have the skills to take Shepard on alone, let alone with her friends around.
She leads him into the elevator, then up to her cabin. Truthfully, she doesn't trust Mordin to keep from harming the young drell. If Thane's still in her cabin, she at least knows she can trust him not to harm the intruder. She finds her drell sitting on the edge of the bed, reading a datapad. He looks up when he hears her footsteps, raising a green 'eyebrow' out of curiosity.
"We have an intruder." She answers his silent question, motioning for the bright red drell to sit on her couch.
"On the Normandy? Quite impressive." He honors the intruder with a short nod, then rises to his feet. "Go easy on him." Thane jokes, before disappearing into the elevator. The other drell's eyes widen, turning his head to face Shepard so quickly that she momentarily fears he may give himself whiplash.
"Who are you?" She asks softly, dropping her Commander mask slightly. The drell looks like he wishes he could disappear into her couch, back bent at an awkward angle as he slides down in his seat.
"I'd rather not tell you my name. Just, come up with your own if you must." Shepard smiles mischievously, deciding on a nickname.
"Okay, Red it is. What were you hoping to achieve, breaking into my ship?" He frowns at the name, but doesn't object. Something about this woman makes him want to obey her every order, ignore his rebellious teenager side.
"I want the hanar to let me become one of their assassins." He isn't sure how much the Commander knows of the Compact, but he stills feels pathetic saying such things.
"I didn't think it worked that way..." She searches her memories for the conversation she had with Thane about the hanar and the Compact. Everything she remembers makes it sound like the hanar do the choosing, not the drell.
"It doesn't. But I still wanted to try. I thought you were up to something much less... kind."
"And you wanted to assassinate us to prove to the hanar that you could." Shepard finishes for him, receiving an ashamed nod. "I'm glad we could settle this without anyone getting hurt. That's it for my questions. I do have a suggestion, though. Find something else to do for the hanar. You have skills, but assassins lead a life of sins. By the time you'll realize that, you won't have any other skills."
"I'll keep that in mind. Thanks for not killing me, Shepard." He spares her a quick smile and heads towards the exit of the ship. Shepard watches as he leaves, asking herself if she should've trusted him as much as she did. He seemed harmless, but... there was something hidden under the smile he flashed her. She doesn't know what it was exactly, but it was definitely intimidating.
Author's Note: Can anyone tell me what song/band the beginning lyrics are from?
Anyways, sorry this took so long. However, this is the longest chapter I've written so far! I think my writing was kinda bland in this chapter, though. Will we see Red again? I haven't decided yet, but there's a high chance we will. Will Thane and Shep ever have sex again? Of course they will. Eventually. I'm aiming for some hardcore Thane/Shep lovin' in chapter 11, we'll see how that goes. Thanks to everyone that's still reading! My plot is picking up, finally. I would love it if everyone that has fav'd/alert'd this story would leave me a review!
Emantsal- It makes my day when you review my story! I'm glad you're liking it, that comes a lot from such a great writer. Now it's your turn to update!
Seluna- Ohhh someone new! Thanks for reading AND reviewing, it means a lot. I haven't decided how he's gonna get revenge yet, I'm always open to ideas! As for the dialog thing, I'll keep that in mind. I try to avoid the uber boring 'Shepard says' and 'Thane says,' but I tried to include more obvious clues in this chapter.