IMPORTANT NOTICE!! Good, do I have your attention? Thank you lol. I have already posted this chapter so if you get that alert thing you'll be wondering why. Its because when I came back to reread my work to start the next chapter, I noticed the ending was not how I finished it, it was only HALF the chapter! So, I have reposted the WHOLE CHAPTER! Enjoy and review!
Disclaimer:Blah Blah Don't own it, shhishkabob!
Chapter 9:Hairy Situations Revised!.
The temperature in the room began to dangerously rise. When Remus finally came to terms of what was happening, he pushed Claudia off him, looking confused and Claudia looking pleased with herself, staring at something over Remus shoulder. He turned in time to see a blur disappear up the girl's staircase.
It was then Lily realized she was standing by herself whilst the people in the common room continued to move around her. Remus had leapt of the couch and had ran to the girl's staircase before stopping as he realized he couldn't get up there and retorted to sitting on the bottom step, his head in his hands.
Claudia, still smirking walked gracefully over to him and sat down next to him, placing one arm around him and brought herself closer to him. Remus looked up to find her with a 'What the Fuck?' look on his face, wondering what on earth had he deserved to have his ex draped all over him. He tried to shake her off but she clung on to him like a cat and continued to smile, ever so often to stroke his hair before she looked up the staircase.
Lily looked up too and recognized the pair of Gabbana slippers before they disappeared again and from the other side of the room she could swear she could hear her sob. After that, Lily realized she could move and in a few quick steps she had reached Remus and Claudia and for once, Lily was taller than both.
"WHY would you do that Claudia?" Lily cried as Claudia sat there stroking his hair. He looked up at the sound of Lily's voice which probably confused him more. She grabbed his wrist and with all the strength she could manage she pulled him out of Claudia's clutches.
"Go to bed!" Lily growled at him and he was happy to comply, he had seen the dangerous spark in her eye.
"What? You can't possibly have not known that the only reason that he was going with Felicity was because of a bet," Claudia sneered, standing up and overshadowing her. Curse these damn short genes!
"Yeah I knew, but you didn't see me passionately kissing Remus did you? Why on earth would you do that? Felicity's your friend!"
"Sure she is, but Remus was mine and she should have known better to take my stuff," she said simply. Lily could feel her face going red.
"Your stuff? YOUR stuff?" she screeched, scaring a couple of second years sitting near the stairs "Remus is a person, not your 'STUFF'! And even if he was going out with Felicity as a dare, they were still going out! And as her friend you knew about the dare you should have eased her through it or let her find out for herself, rather than take matters into your own hands and snog him on the couch in the middle of the common room!" Lily shrieked at her, trying to remember the last time she felt so angry.
"Pfft like I care about her feelings. She's pretty, not as pretty as me but still pretty and has good taste and so I allow her to hang out with me. But when she starts taking things that don't belong to her, she goes down. I don't give a damn about her feelings. She asked him out, he said yes which I forgive him for because that's when the dare came into play and now because I helped him get out of it, he's free to be happy with me," she said plainly, inspecting her fingernails.
"Have you ever considered that he might NOT want to go out with you?" Lily asked her through her gritted teeth.
"Of course he wants to be with me. I could have any guy I want and I want him. I made a mistake dumping him and leaving him for the rest of Hogwarts so I'm taking him back. Besides, if he didn't want me, why did he kiss me back?" and without further a due, she pushed past Lily and headed out of the portrait hole but first stopping to check her appearance in the mirror that hung on the wall. Lily stomped her foot in frustration then stood frozen. She couldn't believe she actually stomped her foot…
After the shock had worn off, she bolted over to the boys staircase, taking the stairs two at a time till she reached the door to the room occupied by the Marauders and rasped three times loudly on the door.
"Don't come in!" Sirius sung out in a sing song voice "We're naked!" Rolling her eyes, Lily kicked the door open and walked in.
"James! Something's hap- OH GOD! AHHH" Lily yelled as she tripped over someone's toy quaffle and landed on the floor, refusing to get up and covering her eyes with her arms.
"I warned you," Sirius said simply as he put his pants on. It was then that James decided to make his appearance from the bathroom before stopping dead once entering the room, looking between Lily hiding her face on the floor and Sirius having difficulty putting his pants on. He couldn't help himself, he burst out laughing.
"Shut up! Shut Up! SHUT UP!" Lily cried into the floor, "Sirius, bloody hell, hurry up!"
"Well excuse me Miss Evans, it's a very difficult task. First of all you need to make sure that the item of clothing you pulled out is a pair of pants, not in fact, a sweater. Then you have the hard task of putting your legs of through the right holes so as you don't end up putting your pants on back to front of and wondering why everyone is pointing at you with a different face than they usually do-" he gave James a dirty look "Then when you have to pull them up you're wondering if these are in fact the pants that fit you or if they were the one's your Aunty Nikki gave you last year that make your bum look big and then, the difficult task of pulling the zipper up so it doesn't get caught on-"
"ARRGGH not LISTENING LA LA LA LA LA" Lily sung until she snuck a glance at James who gave the okay sign for her to look up. She grabbed hold of the bed next to her and stood up. She turned to face James.
"Good, you're here. I need you, its time for our first date," Lily said and grabbed James's wrist and led him out the door, ignoring Sirius's bewilded expression. Once escaping through the portrait hole, Lily dropped James's wrist and he massaged it tenderly.
"I need to talk to you somewhere privately," Lily told him and he raised his eyebrows.
"How bout the kitchens? I'm hungry," Lily rolled her eyes
"Didn't you just have dinner?" James gave her a blank stare
"So?" Lily sighed and she walked briskly down to the basement and once they were seated at the mirror image of the Gryffindor table and James was given enough food to satisfy his hunger, Lily began.
"You know the dare between you and Remus…." She started off with and James looked up from his plate.
"Wif won?" he asked through his food.
"The one about Felicity," Lily reminded him and he nodded his head.
"Oh bat won," Lily, confused for a minute wondering who the bat was and why she would care that he won, then continued.
"Well Claudia seemed to get word of it and when we came back from dinner, she and Remus were sitting on the couch and as soon as she saw us, she pulled him close to her and started snogging him, breaking away and watching Felicity crying as she ran up the girls stair case,"
"Oh Bat Bitts!"
…
"That Bitch?"
"Twat I Fed!"
"Anyway I wanted to ask you something….."
James stared at her with wide eyes "You asked!"
"You talked with your mouth empty!"
"Touché" James said, eyes back down on his food.
"Does Remus still LIKE Claudia?" James stopped eating
"Bo Bay!"
"Well if that's the case, since you're my 'boyfriend', I was wondering if you would help me make Claudia's life hell? As pay back from Felicity?"
"Well it depends… The revenge you talk about. Would that be the whole girl backstabbing her friends or would that be the Marauder way?"
"How about a mixture of both?" Lily asked slyly and James nodded.
"And since I've watched many teenage movies and we're in the kitchen, I have the perfect first one,"
-:-
The next morning was beautiful. The sun rose from behind the mountains as usual, the colours of orange and pink and purple entwining and shadowing the country in those colours. It was all quite and peaceful, the students all continuing to live in their dreams and the birds were waking up and joining in singing their beautiful song with the wood elves from the forest before the screaming of Claudia woke up the whole of the northern hemisphere.
Even due to the early hour, Lily couldn't help but sniggering. Several girls had already pounded on the door, demanding who was killed and if the killer was still in their room and Patience had given herself the job of announcing to everyone that all was fine. She was the only one that Claudia had let inside the hangings of the bed to show what was wrong however Lily had a pretty good picture of what she looked like.
Last night James had helped her carry the ingredients back to the common room before saying goodnight and demanding a photo of her handy work. And so, Lily had set to work. She had covered Claudia's hair entirely in honey before covering it all in whipped cream, making it look like she was wearing a wig. Lily was even artistic enough to give her caramel and chocolate topping highlights. She had also cut up eye holes in her sleeping mask and put superglue on her eyebrows so that the mask stuck and she drew a very thick monobrow on the mask as well. And, as promised, she had taken a photo of her handy work.
"God damn it Claudia, its fricken 5am. I don't think anyone at Hogwarts will be happy you all woke them up coz you got a pimple!" Jessica complained and drew her curtain far enough across to hide her view of Claudia's bed and threw her pillow over her head as if expecting a reprise.
Lily snickered again and grabbed her dressing gown, putting it on and pushed past Patience at the door and went down to the common room. She headed up the boys staircase, this time one at a time and knocked on the door. Not getting any answer, she pushed the door open, squinting her eyes so they were closer to being able to snap shut. This was not needed however, as all the boys were in their beds, looking identical with their pillows over their heads. Lily bounded over to James's bed and jumped onto his back as he let out a loud groan.
"God Lily, can't you have control over any of your friends? Can't you get Claudia to stop screaming for five minutes?" James asked her, trying to turn over but with Lily sitting on top of him it was a difficult task.
"She's not screaming at the moment James," Lily told him, raising an eyebrow.
"Oh my bad, maybe its just her screaming echoing all through my eardrums," James moaned, finally managing to turn over, face up and Lily skillfully kept her balance.
"Well, do you want to see WHY you were all woken this morning?" Lily asked him, giving him an evil grin as he took the pillow away from his face. He's face broke into a huge grin
.
"Gimme!" Lily handed over the photo and James was taken over by a fit of laughs.
"God mate, we just got screamed to death by Claudia, please don't kill us in another way," Sirius complained and James chucked his pillow at him.
"You wanna see why?" James asked and Sirius sprung over, landing on the other side of the bed. He snatched it from James's hands and gave a bark like laugh.
"That's great mate! How did you do it?" Sirius asked James, patting him on the head as he couldn't reach his back.
"I didn't, it was Lily," Sirius gave Lily a stare.
"How very unLADYlike," Sirius told her, raising his eyebrows.
"No Sirius, she found a loophole. They did stuff like this in teenage movies and so she just copied," James reasoned with Sirius.
"Hmmph," Sirius said, stomping off to the bathroom.
"Why didn't you let me answer for myself?" Lily demanded when he was out of ear shot.
"Coz he would believe me over you anyway," James said sensibly. Lily hit him. James rubbed his arm and muttered 'Love you too,"
-:-
Claudia did not arrive for breakfast, nor did she reappear in any of her classes. By now, everyone in the castle had found out that the scream that woke everyone up was Claudia's and Lily, Felicity and Patience were subjected to much questioning from various curious students.
This was hardest on Felicity, her eyes watered over whenever someone mentioned Claudia's name around her which was quite frequent due to the recent cause of events and Lily took it upon herself to take every short cut she had discovered to get Felicity to arrive to class in one peace. This was fine by Patience, she was ecstatic that she had achieved so much attention, whether or not it was because of Claudia.
Patience had also made it her job to deliver messages from Claudia to her teachers to explain her absences. Tiny Professor Flitwick had nodded his head understandably when Patience explained that Claudia was feeling a little under the weather and couldn't bring herself to get up and he wished her a steady recovery. Professor Slughorn just nodded his head when Patience told him as he past her cauldron to inspect and moved right past her to inspect Lily's work. It was only Professor McGonagall who, during their Transfiguration lesson that afternoon asked some questions.
"I trust that you escorted Miss Roderick down to the Hospital Wing this morning then Miss Oxley?" McGonagall said in a voice that wouldn't be out of place in an interrogation.
"Uh, well no. Her symptoms are very…unusual. She was worried that she might be, er, contagious?"
"Well what are they Miss. Oxley? I might not be a healer but I know the basic symptoms for colds and infections she could have caught at this school," McGonagall said, tapping her food and staring at Patience. By now, everyone had given up trying to vanish their assortment of animals and had turned their attention to Patience, some looking forward to see her get grilled by McGonagall, others listening intently to find out if Patience slipped and told what was really wrong with Claudia
"Well, er-" Patience began, looking around for help but unfortunately for her, Lily and Felicity were concentrating very hard on their vanishing spells. McGonagall continued to stare at her with a very impatient look on her face.
"Her hair has become, er, sticky," McGonagall raised her eyebrow "And it turned white with light and dark brown strips which are also sticky and, uh, there have been the grown of extra facial hair," she said the last part quietly, as although it wasn't the exact truth, if Claudia found out that this is what Patience had explained her absence about she would be out like (snap) that.
"Well, the symptoms you are suggesting sound like sphinculititus however it is very uncommon. However, I'm no expert on this particular virus so you should take her down to Miss Pomfrey immediately. Miss Oxley, would you be so kind as to return to Gryffindor tower and help Miss. Roderick down?" Patience nodded and rose from her seat and headed to the door.
"Professor, would it be alright if I accompany Patience to Gryffindor to help with Claudia? The thing is, this morning when I saw Claudia, she looked in no condition to walk and I just thought that two people would be better than one," Lily burst, the attention of the class immediately turned onto her and Felicity looked like she was able to burst into tears again. Professor McGonagall nodded.
"Very well Miss Evans, you may assist Miss Oxley. Be quick and return back to my class as soon as possible to return to your work on the vanishing charm. Bare in mind that if it is not of a statisfactory standard, you will be given extra homework," she said. Patience gulped and Lily nodded.
"Of course Professor," Lily said, standing up and shoving a folded piece of parchment into Felicity's hand and joined Patience at the door. Once out of ear shot of McGonagall, Patience turned to her.
"Why did YOU volunteer to come? I know you and Claudia had a fight last night about her kissing Remus, which I would have done if I were in her position," she said, looking at Lily and expecting the answer to become written on the front of her robes.
"Because I was sorry about what I said yesterday, after all," Lily sighed "Remus DOES belong to her, its only right that I go up and apologize," Patience, satisfied with this answer, continued walking up to Gryffindor tower in silence. Once reaching the door to their room, Patience knocked on the door three times.
"Who's there?" came a high pitched squeak from the room beyond.
"It's me, Patience," Patience simpered, slowly pushing the door open. "Oh, and Lily," she added as an after thought.
"Lily?" the high pitched voice asked in surprise, "What is SHE doing here?" Lily pushed through the door and entered the room before Patience, going straight over to Claudia's bed but as an act of respect she sat down on the chair beside the bed.
"I'm really sorry about what I said yesterday, it's just I didn't know that Remus was technically yours. I thought you had grown tired to him and threw him back into the ocean, I didn't know you were just taking a 'break'," Lily simpered, wondering how disgusting she sounded. Claudia sighed.
"It's okay Lily, I forgive you. After all, you are new. I shouldn't have expected you to have known all the rules yet so it's quite understandable. Anyway, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in McGonagall's class?" Claudia asked, her voice still a tad too high.
"You see Claudia, that's the reason we're here…" Patience said softly "McGonagall has sent us up here to transfer you to the hospital wing,"
"NO!" Claudia squealed and Lily assumed she had thrown her covers over her head. Her theory was proved correct when her muffled voice added "There is no way I'm walking through the corridors of Hogwarts looking like THIS!" she screeched.
"Don't worry Claudia, everyone's in class. Nobody will be able to see you, it's okay," Lily said kindly, trying to keep her grin in.
"Are you sure? Nobody will see me?" her muffled voice squeaked.
"Nobody will see you," Patience agreed, nodding her head even though nobody but Lily could see her.
"I'm going to pull the curtain back now," Lily said slowly and Claudia made a small noise as Lily slowly opened the curtain, revealing a lump under the covers. Lily then gently took hold of the top of the covers and pulled it off to reveal Claudia, looking a little worse for wear. The whipped cream had mostly come of her hair but it had come onto her sheets and pillows. Her hair still looked like it was smeared in honey and was all knotted which Lily knew couldn't result well. It also seemed that the caramel and chocolate topping must have seeped through the cream and onto the honey, staining it and looking as though her hair was caramel and chocolate swirl. The mask was still there, just as Lily expected it would be. The monobrow drawing had become smudged which just made it look hairier. Patience reach over and slowly put her arm out to touch Claudia on the shoulder. Lily was ready for this, she had her wand in her hand, pointed at Claudia from behind her back and as Patience's hand was about to reach her shoulder, Lily muttered a few quick, well chosen words. As soon as Patience's hand had made contact, thick, brown hair grew fast from the region that had been touched by her skin. Claudia shrieked, almost causing an earthquake.
"What did you DO?" she screamed at Patience, moving away from here.
"Nothing I swear Claudia!" Patience looked as shocked at Claudia, staring at her hand. "Maybe whoever did this to you put a spell on you as well!"
This theory didn't seem to make Claudia calmer, indeed, it seemed to have the opposite effect. Before Lily knew it, Claudia was hyperventilating. She began doing it so fast that she started to choke and she lent forward, trying to breath.
"Breathe, Claudia breathe!" Patience panicked, thumping Claudia on the back to help clear her airwaves. Lily was ready again, as soon as Patience's hand touched her back, hair instantly began growing. Patience looked horrified but Claudia was too busy choking to notice. Patience grabbed her arm to pull her into the up right seating position, hair growing there too as soon as she let go. In a last hope of desperation to get her to stop, Patience slapped her. Claudia stopped, then saw the hair growing over her face where she was slapped and started screeching again.
"Claudia, screaming is not going to make it stop," Lily said calmly and they both looked at her as if she was insane.
"Now, we need to get you down to the hospital wing, the question is how," Lily told them, "Claudia, would you allow me to put a hand on you to see if you sprout hair to see if its just all humans or Patience," Patience looked outraged that Lily could refer to her as a disease or being contaminated and stared back at her with a sulky expression but Claudia just screwed up her eyes.
"Just do it," she said to Lily, sticking out her arm in Lily's direction. Lily slowly put her hand on Claudia's elbow, and just as Lily knew it would, nothing happened. Claudia opened one eye a fraction and stared at her arm, before opening them both fully, taking her arm from Lily and ordering
"Patience, go stand over there," she pointed over to the far side of the room
"But, but!" Patience started but Claudia silenced her. Nobody spoke back to the queen bee. Claudia allowed Lily to help her to her feet and while Claudia put her slippers on, Lily fetched her a pair of robes.
"What are they for?" Claudia asked her, raising an eyebrow.
"If you put it on, nobody will be able to see the hair on your body and if you put the hood up, it will cover your hair and hid your face," Lily told her simply and threw the robes to her. She put them on gladly, pulling the hood up and hiding her face instantly.
"What am I supposed to do?" Patience asked as Lily had begun leading Claudia to the door.
"Walk at some distance ahead of us to make sure nobody sees me," Claudia ordered, and even though Patience wasn't happy with Claudia right now, she did what she was told. The walk to the hospital wing was uneventful and Lily excused herself from Madam Pomfrey's waiting gaze to find out the truth by leaving to get back to Transfiguration, leaving Patience to answer all the necessary questions.
Lily slipped inside the door to the classroom at five minutes to the bell, taking her seat next to Felicity. Felicity shot Lily an angry glance as she sat down but Lily knew she had read her note as she hadn't moved away from her. When class ended, on Patience was given extra homework as her caterpillar was still fully intact. Lily asked Felicity to wait outside the door as she sprinted off to catch Jessica. Felicity had only time to inspect her fingernails on one hand by the time Lily came back.
All through dinner, Lily kept jumping and looking excited but Felicity had no clue what was going on. Maybe she would explain after dinner, that's what Lily had wrote in the note she had past her but why should she believe Lily. As soon she had put her last mouthful in her mouth, she had hardly a chance to swallow when Lily grabbed her arm and pulled her from the table.
"Where are taking me?" Felicity grumbled, though she didn't force herself out of Lily's grip.
"The library," Lily said simply without stopping.
"Why?" Felicity asked her in surprise "Nobody ever goes to the library,"
"Exactly," Lily said, which left Felicity more confused than ever. Lily dropped her hold on Felicity when she reached the door to push it open, then lead Felicity inside. Lily wove through stacks and stacks of books until she finally reached a table, towards the back of the library.
"Sit," Lily told her, sitting down at her own chair opposite.
"Are you going to tell me now what's happening?" Felicity asked her sulkily.
"Yeah, I wouldn't mind either," said Jessica, coming into view. She grumpily sat down on the chair next to Felicity, though pushing it as far away from her as she could with Felicity being insulted.
"I'll tell you when the last member of the party gets here," Lily told them calmly, turning to scan the titles of the books around her.
"Well, the last member's here so now we can par-tay," James said, coming into view and plonking on the chair next to Lily.
"So these are the faithful recruitments?" James asked Lily and she nodded "Good turn out, good turn out. Surprised you got Felicity here though," he added as an after thought.
"Not that I had a choice, she dragged me here instead of letting me eat dinner," Felicity grumbled, crossing her arms across her chest.
"Its not like you eat anything anyway," Jessica shot at her, and Felicity stuck out her tongue.
"Ladies, ladies, don't we all want to know what we're here for?" James asked them.
"You already know what you're here for," Felicity pointed out and Jessica rolled her eyes.
"My dear lady, it tis an expression," James said kindly and Felicity blushed.
"Okay, the reason you're all here is because we all share something in common," Lily started before Jessica cut her off.
"Finally coming out of the closet ay James," she smirked and he shook his head "No Jessica, that would be Peter,"
"True," she said before she caught Lily's eye and became somber.
"No, we all do not Claudia," Lily said, waiting for there response.
"Can't deny that,"
"That's true,"
"I like puppies,".
After a sharp look in James's direction, Lily again continued.
"I think that with James and I coming up with plans and with you two to help me we can make her life hell,"
"What do you mean 'James and I'? I am the world renown prankster," James asked her raising his eyebrow.
"In your dreams sweetie," Lily told him, patting his arm softly before turning back to the other two.
"In an act to make her less suspicious, I had the idea that would try to become Claudia's new best friend. I know she would rather me any day than Patience, I made sure of that and it would be very suspicious if Jessica suddenly wanted to be her friend and since she has just taken over Remus territory Felicity wouldn't work either. James and I" she emphasized the last three words "Have come up with a plan and his is what I reckon we should do first……"
A/N: Dun Dun Dun!! I present to you, the WHOLE chapter! You like? If yes, click the button down to the left and select review! If no, still click the button down to your left and select review! Thanks to all the people who have already reviewed the half chapter, if it weren't for your votes I wouldn't be rereading it in order to write another chapter!
Notice:I'm thinking of writing a different HP fanfic (don't fret if I still get reviews for this one I shall continue) and I have a synopsis about it on my profile. Please read it and in your review say whether I should write it or not. Not in instant messages because I never get them, and I never get story alerts or anything I don't know why……… anyways make my day, PLEASE REVIEW!
Moonlight Honeysuckle xo