Chapter 5

Author's Foreword:

I am sorry for the delay, I had to take care of a number of things before proceeding with this!

After the last chapter I will have only 2-3 more things to post on this series but after that I think I will be done, so there will be at least 3 more updates.

This chapter is average length so there isn't much for you guys to worry about.

Thanks to everyone who reviewed!

Where does Starscream drag Wheeljack off to? Let's find out!

"Starscream! What the frag is yer problem?" Wheeljack tried to release himself from the seeker's grasp but found it to be rather hard considering how fast they were running. "Let go!"

"You think your inventions are so great, huh? Well, wait until you see the cannon I designed myself! Me! Starscream!"

"… more like Bitchscream …"

"What did you say?"

"… nothin' …"

"You will all see my superior designs! Pathetic fools! You can't even tell your heads from your afts!"

"… as if yeh can tell the difference between a spike 'n' an aft …"

"What did you say? Stop mumbling, you inferior piece of scrap metal! There's the school!"

"Oh! 'Re we playin' I spy? Try this one: I spy with my little optic a bitch that I will beat the frag out of it he won't quit bein' such a who'eh!"

"You see Tracks?"

"… moron …"

"Why won't these doors open?"

"… it's Friday night …"

"The school is supposed to be open at night!"

"… fragtard …"

"I DEMAND YOU TO OPEN THE DOORS!"

"… I don' think the school ca'ehs …"

"Than we shall enter through the window!"

"… fer the love of Cybehtron, somebody frag this bitch! Frag Starscream!"

Somewhere on Cybertron.

"Did someone just say 'frag Starscream'?"

"Lord Megatron?"

"Hm, must be just me …"

"Hold still, we are almost done calibrating your audio receptors …"

"… the door is closed!"

"Look! One of the windows is open!"

"They must reached the laboratories already! We must hurry!"

"Speaking of hurrying, can I go to the washroom?"

"NO!"

"Taplow! Where did everybody go? Hey! Look! An open window! Frazonk! Imma penetrating the defenses! Boom! … huh … no wonder fembots don't go out with me …"

"Gaze upon the majestic beauty of my all powerful gun!"

"Starscream! Will yeh calm the frag down?"

"Bask in its glory while you have the chance! With it, I shall become the rightful leader of this school!"

"… what the slag did yeh drink …"

"Hahahahahaha! I, Starscream, am the superior out of all of you incorrigible heaps of exhaust fumes!"

"… or smoke …"

"Look at it!" The seeker picked up the gun and in awe of his own creation, he began stroking it. "Look at how long and hard it is!"

"… is that the way yeh like it?"

"To think that I was able to construct something so gorgeous and …" Leaning further and further towards the weapon, the inebriated scientist began licking the muzzle.

"Uuuuuuuurgh," the engineer shivered from top to bottom, "thanks fer givin' me anotheh reason teh see a slaggin' therapist …"

"Mmmm, mghhh …" Starscream got down on the floor, grinding his codpiece against his creation.

"… this is goin' on Bottube ..."

"Wheeljack!" Ratchet, Prowl, Bluestreak and Shockwave ran into the laboratory, "Are you all ri…"

"Mmmmmm, nnnnnmmmmmmm …"

"… what …"

"… the …"

"… scrap …"

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF CYBERTRON ARE YOU DOING?"

"Makin' love, not war."

"Wheeljack!"

"Ratchet, can yeh recommend me eh good psychiatrist?"

"I think we all need a good psychiatrist …"

"First big chest, now this. I wonder what will happen next …"

"STARSCREAM! GET OFF OUR PROJECT!" Shockwave ran up to his lab partner and tried to recover the gun but the second he touched it, the seeker slapped the purple mech away, grabbed the gun and pointed it at the five mechs:

"THIS IS MY SPIKE!"

"WHOA!"

"WOW!"

"STARSCREAM! PUT THAT THING AWAY!"

"EASY! JEEZ!"

"MY SPIKE!"

"Ok, Starscream, put that thing down …"

"MY SPIKE!"

"… wonder what Smokescreen would do …"

"Yes, it is your spike, Shockwave was just trying to, eh, come on! Help me out here!"

"He was, um, eh, checkin' it fer interface transmitted deseases?"

"Illogical!"

"That makes no sense …"

"You are not helping!"

"It doesn't have to make sense as long as it makes sense to him, you morons!"

"MY SPIKE! I FRAG IT AS MUCH AS I WANT!"

"Shockwave, was, um, jealous?"

"JEALOUS?" Starscream stopped screaming for a few astroseconds and pointed the gun at Prowl. "It's all your fault!"

"WHAT?"

"What?"

"What the frag …"

"How?"

"Because of you Shockwave gets all mopey …"

"Starscream!"

"… what …"

"Because of you, Shockwave was crying his optic out …"

"Y-you were?"

"Starscream!"

"… which made me stay here after school for hours upon hours and after each day my dad blind folded me and …"

"WHOA!"

"WOOOOOW!"

"TOO MUCH INFORMATION!"

"… this is a fraggin' goldmine fer Smokescreen …"

"… because of you, Prowl, I, Starscream, had to be humiliated this way!" The scientist cocked the gun, loading it and took aim. "Die!"

"BAM! PROWL!"

"WHOA!"

"WOOW!"

"TOO MUCH INFORMATION!"

"Fwank! What's with all the noise?"

"… this is a fraggin' goldmine fer Smokescreen …"

"Blababoom! They all must be in the lab! Hehe, I should give them a scare! Pow!" Warpath tip-toed towards the door opening and peeked inside. What he saw changed everything.

"… die!"

"BAM! PROWL!"

A few things happened at the same time.

Shockwave leaned forward and tried to push the gun off to the side but slightly miscalculated and the shell shot through his arm and he crashed into Starscream, screaming from pain.

Warpath jumped in between Wheeljack, Bluestreak and Ratchet, pushing them off to the sides, trying to shield Prowl. The dicolor's legs failed and he dropped to the ground as the shell went through Warpath's chest, into the hall, crushing a few walls behind them.

"WAAARPAAAAAAAATH!"

"Uhk, uhkh," the mech stood still for another second when he slowly began tilting forward, "uhkhh, uh …"

"WARPATH!" Wheeljack caught his friend in mid air and quickly dragged him to one of the tables and laid him there. "WARPATH!"

"OH MY CYBERTRON!" Ratchet finally recovered from his initial shock, shivering all over. "OH MY CYBERTRON!"

"RATCHET! GET YER AFT HERE 'N' HELP ME!"

"Y-y-yes!," the medic got up and sprinted to them, "Warpath! He is still alive but he is quickly going critical!"

"I will go call the ambulance!"

"Hurry, Bluestreak!"

"He is one tough bot!"

"We need to, eh, uh …"

"Ratchet!" Wheeljack turned around and slapped him across the face. "Pull yerself togetheh!"

"Right! Ow! We need to patch up the internal circuitry but we don't have materials!"

"Eh, somethin', come on, somethin'," the engineer looked around in hopes to find anything that would be useful as an idea sprung into his head, "the cannon!"

"WHAT?"

"Shockwave's and Starscream's cannon!"

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?"

"Use it!" The purple mech threw it towards Wheeljack. "I will tend to Prowl!"

"What about yeh hand?"

"I'll be fine, take care of Warpath!"

"Right!"

"What the frag are we going to do with a freaking gun?"

"If we can take off the metal coverings," he quickly began disassembling the weapon, "and do a lil' reroutin', we could use this teh keep his chest cavity intact!"

"WHAT? Do you even know what you are doing?"

"No! I don' but it's betteh than lettin' him die on our hands without tryin' anythin'! Help me!"

"R-right! How do you want to do this?"

"It'll take me a few moments teh do all the necessary modifications, clean out his wound for any dead 'n' loose …"

"Got it!" The medic grabbed some tools and immediately began working.

"Uh, uh …"

"Warpath, we are going to save you! Stay with us!"

"… uh, uh …"

"His breath is getting shallower and pressure is dropping! We got another twenty astroseconds at best!"

"I'm done! How is the wound?"

"Clean and ready!"

"Let's do this!" Wheeljack carefully inserted the gun into his friend's chest, "all right, connect these two …"

"… got it …"

"… now cross these three …"

"… ten astroseconds …"

"… seal this bit he'eh …"

"… got it …"

"… and melt this to the main body! He's stabilizin'!"

"We are not out of the woods yet! He still needs patching!"

"Here," the engineer opened up his chest compartment, "I always carry spare platin' on me."

"Whoa, thanks!"

"All righ', yeh finish up he'eh, I'll check up on Prowl."

"Got it."

"Prowl!" the purple mech jumped to his ex.

"Ah, aaaaaah …"

"Prowl! Talk to me!"

"Aaaaah, eeeeh, nghhhhhh."

"Prowl! Is something wrong? Talk to me!"

"It hurts," the dicolor whispered in a very strange way, holding his head and widening his optics, "it hurts, it huuuuurts …"

"What hurts? What …"

"Hee hee heeeeee, aren't you a pretty thing!"

"… what?"

"Bunny! I am a bunny!"

"Prowl?"

"Everything is fiiiiiiiiine, my dear sweet pickle …"

"Prowl! What's with you?"

"I bet we are smarter than Wednesday!" He cupped Shockwave's face. "Sock, Ick-Yak, twenty one!"

What the purple transformer saw disturbed him even more – his ex's helmet was ripped through with holes.

"Prowl! You are hurt!"

"Shockwave, how's Prowl?"

"Wouldn't you sit to quanka hadonka my paper toilet!"

"What the …"

"Look! His head!"

"Holy frag on a frag! Quickly! Get him here!"

"Everything is so tra-la-la! A birdie!"

"What happened teh him?"

"The shrapnel must've penetrated his helmet …"

"How is he alive?"

"Must be thick armeh er just dumb luck!'

"Look! You be Leprecon!"

"What in the name of Cybertron …"

"Hold him still so I can apply the anesthetics! There!"

"What do we do?"

"I'll need teh check his head fer any damage and see what I can do; help me remove his helmet. Thanks … HOLY FRAG! His brain got mo'eh holes than Starscream and fembots combined!"

"I am done with Warpath, he is stable for now … WHAT THE FRAG?"

"What do we do?"

"His personality circuits 're intact …"

"He won't live for more than ten kliks!"

"His processeh is scratched all oveh! Look!"

"Is he going to be all right?"

"Frag, frag, frag, frag! We don't have the equipment to fix this! Nor the expertise!"

"There must be something we can do! His brain is dying!"

"Oh, frag! I can't come up with anything!"

"Wait an astrosec!" Wheeljack snapped his fingers. "Our project!"

"It is not even complete! We don't even know if it works!"

"Yes! That may actually work!"

"What? How do you know anything about it, Shockwave? Wait, Wheeljack, how did you know about Shockwave's gun's internal works?"

"We exchange notes …"

"What?"

"It helped us so far!"

"Really, sharing no…"

"ARE WE GONNA ARGUE OR SAVE PROWL?"

"This is an extremely complicated procedure! We are not fit to do this!"

"There are three of us which will increase the efficiency and chances of success by over 10.3421 percent!"

"I don't know …"

"If we do not do anything, there is a 100 percent chance for Prowl to perish in the next 8 kliks!"

"Ratchet! We don' have much time …"

"I am just a medical student who started his training! You are asking me to do brain surgery!"

"We ain' askin' yeh teh fix him!"

"Huh?"

"We need to bring Prowl to, at the very least, a comatose state!"

"Ratch, yer the only one of us who can do that!"

"Fine! I will prep him while you two get all the necessary equipment!"

"Let's go!"

"Affirmative!"

It wasn't even a klik later that everything was ready.

"I am incapacitated and only have one arm, I shall guide your actions. Do not worry, I have a comprehensive understanding of the systems we shall be dealing with."

"I'll help yeh with the wirin' 'n' everythin' else."

"We have less than 7 kliks at our disposal!"

"We will need to replace his brain part by part."

"The trick'll be teh work 'round his personality circuits …"

"We must begin immediately! Ratchet, Wheeljack, are you two ready?"

"Ready as I will ever be."

"Let's do this."

"You shall commence by cutting the right hemisphere …"

"Shockwave," the white high schooler looked at the cyclops with a hopeful gaze, "are you better?"

"Yes, my systems are back to normal and the bleeding finally stopped. Thank you for asking."

"How are the others?"

"I was informed that Warpath is awake but in a great deal of pain. They administered pain killers but nonetheless, he is functioning and his life is in no immediate danger."

"What about, um …"

"Prowl is in a coma; his status is very questionable. They should be finishing their analysis in a few kliks."

"Starscream?"

"Kicking and screaming. His father is on his way to pick him up."

"I see. What about Wheeljack?"

"I am unaware of his location and state."

"I thought he was in the ambulance with you!"

"I believed he was with you!"

"What? Where is Wheeljack?"

"Boys!"

"Doctor!"

"Yes, doctor?"

"Is it true that you replaced Prowl's brain?"

"Um …"

"Affirmative."

"Uh-huh," the head surgeon scratched his head for an astrosecond and with calm anger in his voice, continued, "Do you realize that you could have killed him?"

"… we …"

"Do you realize how complicated this procedure is even for the most highly-trained world-class professionals?"

"… uh …"

"Not only did you conduct the procedure in an extremely unsterile environment, which put him in danger of catching something deadly …"

"… but …"

"… you actually cut up his brain, worked around the personality circuitry and installed a whole new, not just stem, but everything! Cerebellum, processor, pons, glands …"

"… but …"

"… did it ever occur to you that his circuitry could have been incompatible?"

"What are the results?" slowly, the student pushed each word out of his vocal circuitry, tiredness and exhaustion quickly converting into rage combined with undeniable logic.

"Huh?"

"What are the results?"

"What results? You put my patient in danger!"

"Hey!" Ratchet stepped up and got into the mech's face. "If it wasn't for us, you would have a dead body on your berth!"

"I don't give a …"

"FRAG YOU!" The younger 'bot completely lost it, pushing the doctor to the ground as coolant began flowing like rivers from his optics. "THOSE ARE MY FRIENDS! HOW FRAGGING DARE YOU TALK SLAG TO US AFTER ALL WE DID TO SAVE OUR FRIENDS?"

"Wow, Ratchet …"

"NO! I will not have this afthole yell at us for doing the right slagging thing!" The white mech grabbed the doctor by his coat, brought his face so close that their noses were almost touching and whispered through his dental plates with barely contained fury, "I swear, if anything happens to Warpath or Prowl, I will fucking hunt you the fuck down and fucking mutilate your fucking aft and send it fucking packing to a fucking recycling plant."

"Ratchet …" Shockwave was stunned from what he just saw, following the angry high schooler with his lone eye warily.

"… I am sorry … I didn't mean to …"

"I-I-I should have your license revoked!"

"Calm yourself," Alpha Trion stepped into the hall, "the boys did a wonderful job."

"Alpha Trion!"

"Teacher!"

"Teacher!"

"Ah! Ratchet and Shockwave, my two best students. To be honest I expected …"

"I will go call the police on those two …"

"No, you shall do no such thing."

"What?"

"Consider what they did – not only have they granted two fellow transformers a chance at life from wounds that would normally kill the toughest of soldiers, they have demonstrated truly astonishing skill …"

"That little slagger just snapped and threatened me!"

"Consider the amount of stress they are under; would you have acted any differently?"

"N-n-no …"

"Now, if you would be so kind to tend to Prowl, that would be wonderful."

"Y-yes."

"How is Prowl?"

"Tell us! Please!"

"Have no fear, after a number of surgeries he should be better than ever."

"Oh, Cybertron," Ratchet dropped to the floor like a sac of rocks from exhaustion, "oh, Cybertron …"

"That is great news, Teacher!"

"Yes, you two should be proud of yourselves. Just the two of you performed such surgeries in such conditions …"

"We were not alone …" the medic-to-be weakly said.

"Pardon? There was someone else?"

"Shockwave, you take care of this, I think I am going to faint …"

"There," the oldbot placed Ratchet on one of the free berths, "he just needs rest. Now, Shockwave, what exactly happened?"

"It was I, Ratchet and Wheeljack who …"

Smokescreen was nervously pacing in the hallway of the hospital, waiting for any news. He already called Blaster and told him everything. Ratchet was still resting, Shockwave was sent to another hospital, Starscream's dad just dragged his moronic son down the hall, screaming like a banshee on a period and Prowl and Warpath were still disallowed any visitors.

"Hey, bro …"

"Hey, Blaster, have you seen Wh…" the psychologist turned around to see a blue and yellow mech, "I am sorry, I must have confused you for someone else …"

"No, Smokey, it's me …"

"Why are you blue and yellow?"

"You should see Soundwave, we colored him black …"

"What … why?"

"We made a bet that the loser in Guitar Prime would allow the crowd to color them in whatever means and give them a new name that they had to keep for a whole week."

"Wait, you said the loser... how did both of you lose?"

"Bumblebee's parents came back home …"

"Oh, I see …"

"They called me Twincast and Soundwave is now New Soundwave."

Author's Notes:

How does this slagging event end? Tune in next time!

Yes, I have made a number of references to the future series of Transformers G1 including Victory, Headmasters and a bunch others.

What do you think Starscream's dad did to him? Do share! XD

Chapter 6 will be the ending to this series. After Chapter 6 I will make a couple more updates with some extras I wrote. I can't guarantee that I will be posting them on a weekly basis but they will be posted, that I promise you.

Be kind and leave a review, please! Hope you enjoyed!