There is a god watching over me.
Takkun brought him here. Lord Canti, god of the black flames, protector of the weak. Haruko-san changed Takkun's head and Canti came out.
Black wings. Black flames. Bright orange, yellow, red- fire is my friend. Takkun is my friend and maybe Haruko-san too, even though she is taking Takkun from me. She asked me to come in out of the cold. I don't need to. I'm not cold. But she asked. She didn't listen to Takkun's grandfather. I'm glad. He's wrong.
I am not cursed. I am not a slut. I will not hurt Takkun. He doesn't understand. Only my fire understands, my game turned real. I am not cursed. I am blessed by Lord Canti. God of black flames, black ash.
Fire is my friend, but it leaves marks. Black soot and dust, charcoal and remains. Fire can eat away my problems; the bad places- fire can cleanse and clear. But it leaves parts behind. Gifts. I don't want them. My friend helps, but it can never make them completely disappear.
I wish I could disappear sometimes. I go to my bridge and play with Takkun- the boy, the cat. I saved a cat. I am like Lord Canti, a protector of the weak. Black flames, black wings, black fur. Takkun-neko is black. Takkun-neko is my friend. Fire is my friend. Lord Canti is watching me- I saved a cat. Lord Canti saw. He will help me disappear; I will help him save the world.
The fire helps. It plays and dances, eats and jumps high into the sky. Testing its strength. Testing its enemies. The fire will cleanse and clear.
Lord Canti has black wings. I saw him fly. Fire in the sky.
Fire is never really in the sky. Smoke is. Grey clouds. They hide me away; keep me safe from the others who don't understand. Firemen. Police. They'll stop me and Lord Canti will never help. They don't understand. I need Canti to help me.
Takkun understands, but he is sad. He is sad for me; he knows I am alone with my river, bridge, sky, my other Takkun. He knows the games at school. He knows I don't win. But he doesn't know about my other friends.
Fire, ash, smoke, soot. They are all my friends. We will serve Lord Canti and Lord Canti will help us. I need my friends. Tasuku-sempai is playing baseball in America. Takkun is playing with Haruko-san. I have no one but my cat, my other Takkun. Protector of the weak.
I need Lord Canti to help me. I need to disappear. I need absolution. Baptism by fire. Tasuku-sempai left me, Takkun left me, Canti is leaving me- I am not cursed I don't want to be cursed I am cursed I am cursed I am cursed forever, marked by black ash and smoke. I smell of smoke. Takkun hates smoke. I need my friends. Where is my lighter?
Lord Canti is not real. Fire is not black. The black wings are not real. Where is my fire? Where is my absolution? I am cursed. The fire hurt me once, I am marked. Fire is a false friend. The fire can hurt me and Tasuku-sempai can't save me because he is in America. I need my home.
Takkun.
Help me.