Yay! Chapter four!
Really quick. I don't know how many of you, my readers out there, are also writers here at ff.n, but I have a question for you all. No one seems to have noticed it here yet (or if they have no one has mentioned it), and really I've only noticed it in the first chapter, but bits and pieces of my writing that I know I wrote, seem to have disappeared. Like in my intro of the first chapter, in my sentence about Dib, it seems to have run off with words missing. If you notice this occurring (sentences running into others and not seeming to make sense) please let me know. Granted I don't know how to fix it, but it would be helpful to know when it happens.
I also know that it's not my fault because a lot of the times when it does happen, it seems to be the sentences that I've thought a lot about the wording of.
In other news, chapter eight sucks. I can't wait to get done with writing THAT one.
Once lunch time rolled around Dib lead Zim out of the house and to the car, looking for all the world like he was about to throw up.
"This was your idea." Zim had to remind him as he got into the passenger side of the car.
"That doesn't mean I have to enjoy it." Dib pointed out, getting in as well, starting up the car, and pulling out of the driveway.
They drove for a bit before Dib said, "Since you're the chick you know you're the one that has to plan the wedding, right?"
Zim looked at Dib a moment, letting the information process before yelling, "WHAT!"
Dib cringed at the yell, mumbled something about noise under his breath.
"I know nothing of your human weddings! How am I supposed to plan one!"
"Don't you watch TV, like, all the time?" Dib asked, keeping his face stoic, but on the inside he was enjoying listening to the alien squirm.
"Not annoying shows about marriage!" Zim yelled. "You're rich! Can't you hire someone!"
Dib sighed and rolled his eyes, saying, "Fine, whatever."
A very dirty thought suddenly popped into his head, making him glare hard at the road in focus.
"Good," Zim said, nodding before looking at the human, noticing the glare. "What's your problem?"
"Why do YOU care?" Dib asked bitterly like Zim had the night before.
"I don't," Zim said, crossing his arms.
"If I told you, it would only make you mad." Dib sighed, his facial features softening some on the road.
Zim rolled his eyes. "Doesn't stop you any other time, being that EVERYTHING you say makes me mad."
Dib glowered. "FINE! If you wanna know so badly I'll tell you! I-" He couldn't spit it out. His face grew red from the disgustingly horrible thought he had that distracted him so. "I was thinking about ..." He searched his brain quickly and lied. "... How ugly you'd look in a wedding dress." There! That was good. That would be convincing, right?
Zim scowled, completely convinced.
"You're so charming." He spat. "No wonder you're marrying a nice girl with a beautiful laugh and amazing personality! Oh, wait, you aren't! You're so desperate for attention you had to kidnap an alien and FORCE him to marry you!"
Deeply offended about being called ugly Zim slouched in his seat and pouted angrily at every living thing they passed.
The air hung heavy with tension then, and though Dib was outraged by that comment he couldn't help but feel an equal helping of hurt.
"Z-Zim..." The human started, but couldn't figure out what he wanted to say. 'You're ugly', 'sorry', or 'you're right'? So he just stayed quiet for a while longer before asking, "W-why do you think… he's like that..? Did I ever fuck up that bad..?"
Zim glared at Dib once more. How should he know?
Dib let out a small 'ha', choking down his sadness and swallowing it with mustered up humor. "You're right, though. I suck. It's no wonder I can't find a girl who likes me for who I am… it's no wonder I have to do all of this to prove myself to Dad. Thanks Zim."
Zim looked at Dib consideringly for a moment, feeling lucky he didn't have to prove himself to anyone… everyone already knew how awesome Zim was.
"You don't... 'suck', Dib- stink." He finally said, but tried not to make it sound like he was apologizing or sympathizing. "Because if you did then I would also 'suck' because you were able to capture me, and Zim does not 'suck'; Zim is amazing, the best!"
The corners of Dib's lips upturned slightly in humor. "Yeah, I guess you've got a point there…." He smiled more fully. "And, just to let you know, I wasn't actually thinking about how ugly you'd be in a wedding-dress." He laughed, trying to apologies in his own way.
Zim smirked at that, asking teasingly, "Then you were thinking of how fabulous Zim would look in a wedding dress?"
"It has nothing to do with the wedding dress." Dib admitted. Oh no, it was much worse than the wedding dress. It was what would be worn AFTER the wedding dress if the was an actual relationship and not a scam.
Zim looked confused, asking, "Then what WERE you thinking about?"
"It's a human thing, don't worry about it." Dib said, hoping that would make Zim just drop it.
Zim pouted but shook his head, saying, "Fine, feel lucky that, being a much more advanced species, I need not concern myself with your pathetic human thoughts."
Even as he said that Zim desperately wanted to know what the human had been thinking.
Dib sighed in relief when Zim dropped it, indeed feeling very lucky.
Once in the parking lot of a fancy looking place Dib shut off the ignition and turned to Zim saying, "From this point on I'm going to start calling you Zimma," he paused, looking down from a moment in thought before back up and adding, "I'll get the door for you."
With that the human got out of the car and went around to the passenger side and getting the door for his 'lady' friend. Zim got out and looked up at the place.
Dib had taken Zim to a somewhat fancy restaurant, the kind that high class business men and women went to, to either make business deals, impress potential clients, or to secretly neck at a table in the back behind a decorative potted tree. The human offered his arm in what would be an appropriate manner and, hesitantly, Zim took it.
Dib led Zim into the restaurant, walking up to the hostess. "Table for two." He said, giving Zim the warmest smile he could, this was more for his benefit than the woman's though.
The woman, a blonde with way too much lip stick, stared at the two a moment, more interested in how they were dressed for such a fancy restaurant than the color of Zim's skin or what a 'cute' couple they made. Finally she seemed to blink herself out of the daze and smiled, saying, "Right this way."
The woman led the two to a table in the back where the light was low and they were still within hearing range of the other diners, but barely within sight.
"Will this do?" The woman asked.
"I think so, what about you, Dear?" Dib asked, nudging Zim slightly with his arm, effectively smothering the alien's glare that was directed at the floor.
"Y-yeah," Zim said, nodding quickly, just wanting the hostess to leave.
The hostess took the hint… or at least a hint, and quickly smiled, putting down the menus and saying, "Your waiter will be with you shortly." And almost dashing off.
Dib walked around and pulled a chair out for Zim, who quickly sat down. The human then took the chair next to his alien fiancé, saying, "Great spot, slightly dimmed lights, other people's view obscured, woman playing the piano not far away. This table practically does the acting for us. We look like a couple just sitting here."
"How long do we have to stay here?" Zim asked, looking over his menu as Dib did the same.
"As long as the meal is." Dib said with a shrug. "Feel free to order whatever you want, don't worry about prices or anything."
Zim wasn't even looking at the prices, not caring in any way, shape, or form, mostly just squinting confusedly at the curly writing explaining what made up each dish. It was getting hard for him to choose. Everything was made so confusingly, fried, grilled, baked, covered in these sauces or this sauce and topped with cheese or rosemary or some things he couldn't even pronounce. Why did humans consider things that were more complicated better?
Pretty soon the waiter came, asking, "Can I start you two off with something to drink and maybe an appetizer?"
Dib reached over the table, putting his menu down and taking Zim's hand from his own menu, flinching slightly as he felt the texture of the alien glove. This was good though, this was why they were out practicing.
"Zimma, dear?" He asked, making the alien look up. "What would you like to drink?"
Zim almost yanked his hand away when he felt the touch, but was proud he didn't as he replied, "Just a poop cola."
The waiter wrote that down before turning to Dib. "And for you?"
"I'll have a strawberry daiquiri." Dib said.
The waiter wrote that down as well before quickly leaving, feeling a tension between the two of them that could very easily be misunderstood as something other than aggression.
Dib quickly let go of the hand and Zim went back to looking over the menu, wanting to decide on something quickly so they could get this over with.
"What's this?" Zim asked, pointing to something. "Does that have meat in it?"
Dib looked at the menu before shaking his head. "No, I think that would be alright for you." He said. "It's just some pasta stuffed with cheeses. The pasta is made with water, but enough should be off of it by the time it gets here that it would only be a little spicy."
"I'm getting the shrimp." The human then said, putting his menu down. Zim stuck his tongue out at the thought of the little sea creatures, but didn't say anything about that.
Dib set the menus on the side to the table and looked over at Zim. Then at the flame. He snatched the flame up in his fingers a few times, watching it recline on its wick and come back with vengeance and he sighed, not knowing what to say.
It was Zim who finally broke the silence, staring at Dib for a moment before asking, "Dib, are you gay?"
The human's face went red at the very thought of it.
"No… Why?" He stopped playing with the flame to notice his fingers were black. He wiped it on his pants though and continued giving Zim his embarrassed yet confused look.
"Some things from high school I just remembered." Zim said, shrugging. "I remember you used to be called gay a lot, and some of the stink-beasts there would whisper stories about you."
Dib frowned. "They also called you a 'retard' but you're not, are you?" He said before sighing and adding, "Don't you have bullies on your planet? They were just saying that crap to make people not like me and to make me feel bad."
Zim opened his mouth to say something, but the waiter came back, dropping off the drink and taking the menus along with their orders before leaving once more to give the two some privacy.
"I'm not gay." Dib pouted. "And anyway, wouldn't you rather be kidnapped by a straight guy than a gay guy? At least you know I won't try and rape you."
"What's wrong with being gay?" Zim asked innocently, completely oblivious to the implications.
"L-l-lots of things! F-for example… Gay guys… they're… 'wrong', you know? They like other men and that's disgusting... On top of that, even if it isn't 'wrong' to be gay, they get beaten up for it, thrown in trashcans and actually raped for it themselves… so, so yeah… There's something wrong with being gay..." The human played with his napkin, blushing.
Zim didn't look impressed, in fact, he looked offended.
"You humans and your social insecurities."
"What do you mean?" Dib asked, looking up. He slowly began feeling better that he and Zim were making progress, even if it was on a topic such as homosexuality.
"Anything different is always 'wrong'." Zim said, trying to keep his face straight as he looked up at Dib. "Would you... throw me in a trash can?" Zim knew that was a stupid question, of course Dib would, they were enemies, they hated each other!
"After all the years I've known you? You deserve better torture like getting ripped to shreds, being pulled apart, being thrown in a bathtub… not something so -degrading- as a trashcan, or that would be what I deserve too… and I'd much rather be ripped to shreds than being dumped in a trashcan." He smirked, and something dawned on him. "You're gay?" He looked up at his bride-to-be with a look of total shock.
"If you're asking if I prefer men to women, then yes, I do, female Irkens are... well let's just say YOU wouldn't survive a night with one." Zim said, poking a finger in Dib's direction. "They are very aggressive in bed. Something about repressed nesting instincts or something is the excuse they give us in the academy."
"Weird..." was all Dib said, finding this bit of new information maybe even a little bit scary.
Dib began sucking on his alcoholic beverage thinking back. "So all this time I've been fighting you; I've really been fighting a gay alien?" He thought harder. "You… don't get off on torture, do you?" This was a loaded question.
Zim, unfortunately, had no nose for which his soda could make it's exit so he choked on it for a bit before saying, "What, n-no, I do NOT get off on torture. I was under the impression that you did as you kept coming back for more of it." He smirked.
"Kept coming back… HA! That's why I've been putting YOU through more torture lately than myself, huh?" Dib snorted at the very THOUGHT of him getting off on torture by ZIM of all… things. He sipped down more of his daiquiri.
When the food finally arrived Zim scowled at the evil, smelly fish things that Dib had ordered, quickly putting a piece of stuffed pasta into his mouth, not even minding the watery sting if it meant not having to imagine what that stuff tasted like.
When he was done chewing he replied, "You're just trying to provoke me into giving you the pain you so crave. Admit it, Zim is the sexiest future ruler of the Earth you have ever laid your unworthy eyes upon and you hunger for me to hurt you."
Dib looked over at Zim setting oh so nearby. "Not only is that wrong on the basis that I am NOT trying to provoke you... but it's also wrong in the fact that you're not sexy, not the future ruler of earth, and I do NOT, repeat, do NOT get enjoyment out of you hurting me. I don't want that." Dib drank a big portion of his drink, setting it down with a light 'thump'. "The very thought of me wanting you to… hurt me… gives me goose bumps!" He pouted, and looked around a few people looking at them.
That's right. They were a couple. Practice. He swiftly yet smoothly pulled his arm around Zim's shoulder.
Zim tauntingly dragged a claw down the side of Dib's face and said, "I know, I know, I am so charismatic it intimidates you to speak of me in such a way, but rest assured I get just as much pleasure out of hurting you as you do receiving the pain, so why don't we hurry up with breakfast, we go back to my base, and I beat you like the Dib-slave you are."
Dib winced and blushed. "No, HONEY, I think not." He coughed, obviously trying to mask his embarrassment. Though, the way he had said it so deviously and so smoothly, without a beat and not getting at all upset by everything Dib had said... it did trigger intimidation in a sense, if only for the moment. "Anyway, I didn't think you'd get that much pleasure out of me." He said more calmly so other people wouldn't listen in. "If you get as much pleasure out of hurting me as you think I do out of it..." He shifted uncomfortably. "Claws off my face, dear?"
Zim snickered at his obvious victory and removed his hand, relocating it back over to his fork so he could take a few more bites of his food.
Dib took his own arm back to pick at his shrimp, pouting the whole time. He had lost.
He hated losing.
It was like a loss for earth but worse, because it was HIM that was losing against ZIM.
Zim looked at Dib for a moment, his look changing from victorious to thoughtful as he ate. He decided to ask what was on his mind, after all, Dib now knew an interesting fact about Zim, now it was Zim's turn to know, "Dib, why is it you stick up for Earth when all of your fellow earthenoids seem to hate you?"
That was easy. Dib poured down more of the drink. "Because no matter how big of jerks they are, nobody deserved to be a slave or to be killed unless their intentions are just that." He pointed to Zim with a lazy finger. "Like you. Now you're my slave which I can kill." He sipped more on his drink, feeling a little tipsy. "I don't care for the jerks, but they're all I've got and yeah… don't deserve it. None of them." His drink was done with.
Zim shook his head. "You are impossible to understand. You're pretty much martyring yourself for a lost cause. The armada will come eventually, maybe not in your life time, or in my life time, but they will come."
"Then why haven't they yet?" Dib asked, holding onto the table so he wouldn't lean over and fall.
"This planet is worthless to them." Zim said before giving Dib a quizzical look and asking, "Are you alright?"
"I'm a little bit tipsy." He looked over at Zim, grinningly. "Aren't you? Isn't this room? Wait, no, it's me. Yeah. Yeah. Me." He looked over. "Are you done eating? Would you like anything more?"
"Yeah," Zim said, inching a little bit away. "I would LIKE for you to stop acting weird."
"Oh, Hun." He put his arms around Zim evilly and grinned. "I'm not acting weird. Check please!" He rose a hand and the waiter came by with the check. He put his credit card back down and started to nuzzle Zim some more.
Zim shuttered at the gross feeling of their skin touching, wanting so desperately to pull away, but resisting because they were in public.
"Dib, what do you think you're doing?" He whispered harshly.
"Being evil, Lumpkins." He said deviously, smirking before one handedly taking back his credit card as the waiter brought it back and fetching twenty dollars to put on the table as a tip.
"W-well stop!" Zim whispered so as not to draw attention though it was a little late for that. "You're pissing me off."
Dib brought his nose up to Zim's cheek, grinning. "Whatever you say, Darling." and he let go, standing up.
Zim shot Dib a glare before standing up as well, following Dib out of the restaurant. "I hope you don't plan on driving like that." Zim said, suddenly not trusting Dib at all.
Dib stumbled but caught himself. "What me? I'm fiine. I've done this a MILLIONTH times already done. Don't wooooorryyyy." He held the restaurant's doors open for Zim.
"Like hell you're fine." Zim growled, and, grabbing Dib's arm, pulled him out of the restaurant and said, "We're walking, Dib-stink."
Dib glared, mumbling something under his breath as Zim directed him, something along the lines of 'you're not my father!' But he sighed, letting it go as he tried to regain his balance every once in a while.
"Why not… I've done it before and nothing happened…" He pouted but let Zim in complete control of him.
"Because you car is a death trap on wheels as it is, I'm NOT letting you drive drunk and get us killed!" Zim almost shouted.
Dib glared the other direction and successfully fell on the floor. "Damn it!" It wasn't supposed to be this way. He was suppose to practice acting like he loved Zim and he had been doing hardly ANY of that today-instead he got intoxicated and looked like a fool to random passerby, and of course, Zim. "Fuck it all! He can go to hell!"
Zim took a step back, antennae under his wig twitching. Dib wasn't going back on the deal, was he? He wasn't going to kill Zim, right?
Dib pulled himself up and slopping down at each step closer to Zim, embraced him like he had before during their first practice, but was instead not tense at all, and not at all forced.
Zim tensed, eyes wide for a moment before he just patted Dib's side a little, not wanting to ignore the human and not wanting to actually touch him at the same time.
When the human held that embrace for a little longer than should have been comfortable Zim asked on impulsion, "Are you… okay?"
"Yeah..." The human mumbled drowsily, putting more weight on the Irken as his knees almost gave out on him. "I'm just fine. You're pretty as a girl, Zim. Did you know that? Heheh… 'Zimma'?"
Zim blushed and stared at a wall close to them before saying, "Yes, yes, Zimma is amazing. Now we should probably get you home and something more solid than just shrimp and booze to soak up all that nasty in your belly."
"Fiiiine, fiiine. Let's gooo theeeen." He whined. Walking was going to take forever, but he did as Zim told him to and let go of him to wobble onwards towards home.
"Heheh… Hey… Zim? You called it… 'home'." He giggled after a little while of walking.
"That liquid stupid has a bad hold of your brain, Dib-worm. Yes I said 'home' but was referring to it as being your home." Zim said in a 'duh' sort of way.
"Maybe," Dib said with a shrug, one that almost toppled them over when it made him lose his balance. "I like drinking. Anytime I go out to eat I get something with alcohol."
"Why?" Zim asked. "What possible purpose could destroying your brain and liver serve other than to slowly kill you?"
Dib stopped walking for a moment to try to remember why. What was the reason again? He thought long and hard on it. When he couldn't remember the reasoning behind it, he continued on, tripping a bit, but not as bad as he first had when he left the building.
"It's stronger on me in the mornings and at night… and… I like it for some reason. Makes me feel... Something… Like if I'm sad, I can feel sadder… when I'm happy, I feel happier… when I'm angry, I feel angry, but more importantly, I feel... It's real… yet… not real." He began leaning up against Zim's shoulder for support.
"That's stupid." Zim said simply, wrapping an arm around Dib's waist and putting one of Dib's arms over his shoulder to help the human walk.
"Why's that?" Dib turned his head to ask the girlier figure.
"Because that's just killing yourself over stupid feelings." Zim said.
"It won't kill me…" Dib mumbled. "Not if I don't drink too muchs." His head hung low watching a bug they passed by and changed his attention elsewhere. "And anyway, you want me dead so it doesn't matter to you."
"Dib," Zim said, sighing, ashamed to admit this. "If I wanted you dead, don't you think you'd be dead by now?"
Dib cringed, realizing this. "Yeah..." He hung his head low. "Does this mean I'm suicidal? Cause I don't really know now and you make it sound like it is and I'm getting confused and the floor is still spinning."
"Then don't look at the floor!" Zim chastised. "And no, it doesn't mean you are suicidal... just stupid."
"Oh," Dib looked up at Zim instead, tripping in the process. "That makes sense, I think." They were silent then until they reached the house and the computer unlocked the door for Dib so the human could just stumble inside and collapse on the couch.
Zim walked in and shut the door behind him, looking around like something was going to jump out at him before looking back so Dib and asking, "So what now?"
"Now I eat something, drink something, get over this weirdness and Zim does whatever the hell Zim feels like doing." Dib got up and wobbled over to the kitchen.
Zim followed Dib into the kitchen, shoving him onto one of the bar stools and looking around the nice, expensive kitchen, asking, "What do you need all this for? Do you even cook?" He shook his head and started looking around the kitchen for something starchy to negate the effects of the alcohol.
"And you know I was talking about your dad, and the engagement."
"Oh… um… that... Nah… it's still on. I just had a little melt-down back there… that's all…" Dib sat on the stool a little dizzy, not expecting Zim to take over and try to cook for his benefit.
"Eh, oh well, it was worth a shot." Zim said jokingly before growling and using the counter to give him a boost to reach for something too high for him. "Why do you keep your bread so high up!"
Dib pulled out of his seat and took Zim by the waste pulling him down. "Because I'm tall." He said, leaning over and pulling the bread down and handing it to Zim before slouching back down into the stool.
Zim grumbled like a child who'd just been told 'no desert until you eat your spinach!" But he shook off his annoyance at Dib and his... HEIGHT and opened the fridge, pulling out various sandwhicy things and asking, "Is there anything you don't like on sandwiches?"
"Pickles… mustard… ketchup… The rest is fine…" He rested his spinning head on the counter, eternally grateful towards Zim to doing this, although he wasn't quite sure. "Hey, Zim… Why are you trying to get me sober?"
"Because you're scary drunk." Zim said simply as he put the three items back in the fridge and set to work making the sandwich.
Dib mumbled. "How so? You should be more scared when I'm not drunk because I like hurting you more then." He nodded, agreeing with himself.
"I can handle hurting." Zim said as he prepared the sandwich. "I'm a soldier, remember? It's the touches I don't like. When you're drunk you can't seem to keep your filthy human skin off mine."
Dib stared at him with his head resting comfortably on the counter. "Why not..? You're human, aren't you?" Dib asked, obviously not listening to himself thanks to the tipsiness.
"Of course not!" Zim said as if that offended him, which it did. He put the sandwich in front of Dib and said, "Eat." Before turned and getting a glass from the counter and using the fridges automatic ice and water dispenser to make Dib a glass of water, putting that down next to the plate.
Dib had already forgotten what was said to offend Zim so this sudden personality change startled him. He picked up the sandwich and began munching on it a bit, taking a sip of his water every now and then. "Hank hyuu Hiimm" Dib thanked Zim as he munched on more food and drank more water, unsure exactly why again.
"Your brain meats have turned to goop, yes?" Zim asked, leaning on the counter far away from the water. "Let's just hope you sober up before we have to meet up with your father... you know we have to go get your car too."
He munched on more sandwich and swallowed before speaking again. "I'll probably send someone out to get it… M'mmm, yeeeeah… But I'll probably sober up before six… it's… hours away… not… sure how many exactly, but its hours, I'm sure… I think." He continued eating his sandwich till it was gone.
Zim looked at the wall clock, and said, "It's two now, which means about four hours."
Dib snorted. "I'll be better in an hour or less!" He took his water and chugged it down, similarly to how he just whooshed away his alcohol earlier.
"You are hopeless, Dib-worm." Zim said, sighing and yawning.
Dib got up a little wobbly still but better, and put up the glass and plate, walking over to Zim and placing his hand on the other's shoulder. "You're tired..? Did you get any sleep last night? You've got a room. Want to nap?" He asked gingerly towards the other.
"No, I'm not tired. But a nap would be nice." Zim said, standing up straight. He didn't give Dib a smile of thanks or anything, the human's... caring unnerved him.
Dib frowned as he watched the Irken just walk away. He seemed almost depressed about something.
Zim didn't even bother removing his clothes or disguise; he simply plopped down onto the bed and sighed. He was a little more comfortable now that he was away from Dib and those… touches. It made his skin crawl.
Dib sighed and walked over to the living room, plopping on the couch and turning on the TV. When nothing good was on, he napped himself on the couch.
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