Hkjdhflasjhd! I'm so DUMB! ARGH! *headdesk*
So, for those of you who HAVEN'T noticed my absence (thanks, I can really feel the love), I've been gone for a while! You see, my parents are nosy, nosy people, and the thought of them finding my fanfiction makes me sick to my stomach (not that they're intolerant and would flip out, but GOD the questions I'd have to answer!) so I keep everything on a flash drive and, well, I hadn't been able to find it THIS WHOLE TIME!
I HAD this chapter done for a while, but with my flash drive awol I couldn't upload it, so I wasn't being lazy, just stupid. I found it jsut a few minutes prior to me uploading this... in a safe place I put it so I wouldn't lose it. -_- Yeah. It was RIGHT where I left it, I just left it in a spot I didn't think to look. So I have to find a new safe place to put this thing. Until then, let's hope I don't lose it again.
As an update to you guys, I AM still working on the My Only rewrite, I just like this story better, but will have less time for both it and this because classes have started back up, and I find it hard to type a lot recently because, well, it's cold as Death outside and my hands don't work when there is no warmth (I'm a tropical flower, I wilt when it drops below 70.)
Also, Ren Fest Rehearsals are going on. ^^ Very happy about that! Yay for my Renny friends!
So, yeah, that's just so you know if you find yourself waiting another three months for a chapter, though I will do my damned best to keep that from happening! *action hero pose*
It was three by the time Dib woke up. It was cold and his head was hurting, but not too bad. He sat up and recalled vaguely what had happened, remembering that Zim had gone up to his room for a nap. With a yawn he stood and made his way up to the room to his personal queen.
Zim was sleeping soundly, having forced his pak to shut down after about fifteen minutes of just laying there. He snuggled against the pillow in his arms.
Walking quietly over to the alien Dib leaned on the bed with his face just inches from the alien's and gave a loud shout of, "BOO!"
Zim gasped and jumped back, almost falling off the bed, a hand over his spooch. "What are you doing!"
"Math," Dib said with a smirk. "I was awake, you were asleep, it's easy really."
"I hate you," Zim hissed, standing and fixing his disguise. He then swore something in irken, straightening the pillow on the bed.
"You too, dear." Dib laughed slightly. "Anyway, now that we're awake, what do you wanna do?"
"Oh, there are lots of things I'd like to do to you, DARling," Zim growled. "But I can't get into my pak."
"Oh yeah," Dib said, as though he'd completely forgotten about that. "Hey, doesn't that sort of make you my slave?" He couldn't help but grin; he loved it when he won.
Zim scowled angrily at Dib, turning to storm from the room.
Dib followed, snickering in victory.
"Your whole planet can just fuck itself!" Zim yelled, stomping down the stairs and into the living room.
Dib smirked harder. "And your whole planet can just kill themselves!" He peered downstairs.
"I HOPE YOU ARE VIOLATED BY A HAM DEMON!" Zim yelled, moving to sit on the couch and pout.
"Violated... by... a HAM demon? Why violated?" Dib asked, stepping down the stairs gracefully.
"Because you cannot simply DIE, Dib, you must experience pain, oh the pain you must feel before you can escape into the cold mercy that is death." Zim said, his voice a hiss towards the end.
"Too bad that'll never happen to me huh?" Dib leaned over the couch, smirking like before.
"Don't be too sure, Dib-stink." Zim growled. "I REALLY hate you right now. If this keeps up I'll have to rip my antennae out so I won't have to hear your voice."
"Self mutilating?" His smirk went away to give a curious look. "You're emo for real, Zim?"
"Will you leave me alone if I say 'yes?'" Zim asked, crossing his arms.
"Will you hurt yourself if I leave you alone?" Trick question, but Zim didn't have to know that.
"Why would you care?" Zim asked before narrowing his eyes and adding, "Or is it that you want to watch?"
"You are emo, aren't you?" Dib hopped over the head of the couch to plop down next to Zim. "And here you were teasing me about me wanting to be hurt by you- and here this whole time YOU wanted to hurt YOURSELF. Oh, the irony." He smirked, pulling in closer.
"I'm NOT emo." Zim snapped. "I want the drunk Dib back."
A sudden, rather disturbing thought came to mind and Dib quickly grabbed Zim's arm. "Is this why you always wear those gloves?" He frowned and stripped the glove off to look at the arm he was holding to get a good look of the underside.
"Ah! No! Give that back!" Zim yelled, yanking his arm away and hiding it in his sleeve. "Of course I would never cut there! The skin of my wrist is much too thin. I just don't like to be touched!"
"And how do you know that?" Dib asked, holding the glove out of arm's reach. "Have you tried?"
"Maybe," Zim said with a pout. "Now give it back!"
"You've TRIED there?" Dib quickly pushed Zim down on the couch, pinning him by his shoulders. "What the hell is WRONG with you! Hurting yourself? Are you serious?"
"Get off!" Zim yelled. "Get off get off!" The human's intense reaction was freaking him out, along with Dib's bare hands touching his bare shoulders. "Remove your filthy human fingers from me!"
Dib glared down at the Irken. "Not until you tell me where you hurt yourself and promise you won't do it again."
"Not anywhere your DADDY'll see if THAT's what you're worried about, Dib-shit!" Zim yelled, wanting to get under Dib's skin.
Dib held his breath, staring down at Zim, startled. He hadn't thought about that at all, and that's where Zim's mind goes?
"NO! That's NOT the FUCK what I'm worried about! I'm NOT worried! I'm FUCKING PISSED that my worst enemy would degrade himself so low as to purposefully hurt HIMSELF!" Dib yelled once over his shock. He felt so much anger just spill over and he couldn't stop it anymore than he could stop his words. "Why the hell shouldn't I be angry! You're making YOURSELF weak! What's the purpose in THAT, you green bug? I don't WANT you to hurt yourself! I want to hurt you, you bastard!"
Zim cringed a little. His whole body was tense, he felt like he was going to pull a muscle just laying there under the human.
"I'm NOT emo." He said again, glaring. "You left for college a little after high school and my Tallest stopped believing that I was making any progress because they were so used to seeing me wounded from fighting YOU. I started injuring myself to make it look like I was still fighting to conquer Earth. Then I couldn't reach them anymore."
Dib's facial expression softened, but he still looked very pissed. "You don't still do it, do you...?"
Zim looked away, feeling slightly ashamed of himself. "Haven't had to in a while. Since you're back I don't have to fake injuries."
"That's right," Dib said, pulling off the alien. "Only I'm allowed to hurt that body of yours."
"Whatever," Zim said, sitting up and glaring at Dib, though his words held no bite. What could he do? He couldn't even get into his pak and it left him feeling useless.
Dib sighed. "If it was up to me," he said. "I wouldn't have gone to college. The thought of leaving you alone to plot made me feel like I was abandoning my post. I did graduate early though so I could get back and make sure you weren't planning anything stupid again." He averted his eyes. "Just promise you won't hurt yourself while you're here. Alright?"
"Not like you'll know if I do anyway." Zim replied, not really meaning to imply that he WOULD, but wanting to plant dark thoughts in the human's head.
"Then I'll just have to follow you, make SURE that you don't." Dib snapped.
"Good luck with that." Zim said, rolling his eyes.
"We're equals, Zim." Dib said pointedly. "I'm as weak as the enemy I can't defeat. You doing something so stupid makes me just as stupid for not being able to beat you. You can't hurt yourself again, that's MY job."
"You're an ass." Zim growled, standing and heading up the stairs. Dib got up as well and followed, keeping true to his words and keeping Zim in sight.
Zim whirled on Dib quickly, growling in hate before turning and running up the stairs and into his room.
Dib caught the door before it could slam into his face, throwing it open and following Zim in. "I'm not leaving you alone!"
"Go away!" Zim yelled, crossing his arms, hiding his gloveless hand. "I'm in no mood for your stupidity!"
"You're the stupid one!" Dib yelled.
"Shut up!" Zim shouted, wishing he was wearing a much more substantial shirt, feeling practically naked with his shoulders so exposed and the thin fabric stretching awkwardly as he held his hand in his sleeve.
Dib took a deep breath in an attempt to calm down, saying, "Look, you're not getting rid of me. I can't trust you with yourself now that I know all of this."
"I want to be alone." Zim said, narrowing his eyes.
Dib narrowed his own eyes right back, asking, "How would you feel if I started cutting myself?" Immediately though he thought of how stupid that question was and wanted to take it back. "Just tell me you'll stop."
"I don't have to tell you anything." Zim said, not wanting to give in to the human's insecurities. That's all they were, anyway. It made Dib feel insecure that he couldn't beat an enemy who had weakened himself.
Dib looked at Zim almost sadly, saying, "Then I'm not leaving you alone. If you can't even say it then I know you can't do it."
"We're in the same house, Dib-stink." Zim said, wanting desperately to be left alone. "It's not like it would be something I could hide from you whether you followed me around or not."
Dib sighed, shaking his head before saying, "Look- if it means anything, I think you're going to be an awesome bride, and I'll try not to… pick on you so much." He felt like he was being made to apologize for spitting on some kid on the playground.
"Why?" Zim asked, expression instantly snapping into one of confusion. "Why would you do that?"
"I don't know, it's just weird seeing you like this, and if I'm the one starting it then I guess I just feel like I need to stop." Dib said, shrugging.
"You can probably take that off now." Dib added as he gestured about his own face in regards to the makeup.
"I still need it for the meeting with your parent." Zim said, looking to be considering what Dib had said before that.
"Oh yeah." Dib said, rubbing the back of his head, feeling awkward now.
Zim let the silence roll on for a moment before asking, "Where's my glove?"
Dib looked at his hands, as though expecting it to still be there before saying, "I think I dropped it somewhere around the couch."
Zim made his way quietly down to the living room and found his glove half hanging off the couch. He grabbed it and put it back on then gave his fingers a flex once everything was comfortably in place.
Dib followed Zim, watching the alien sit back down on his side of the couch and grab the remote before sitting on the other side, asking, "Zim- are you-?" But stopping, deciding against it.
"Am I what?" Zim asked, looking at Dib, even as he flipped through the channels.
"Nothing." Dib replied, waving a hand. Zim just glared but let it slide, not really caring what Dib had to say.
The alien finally settled on a bad horror movie, deciding the psychological torment of teenaged humans would lift his mood a bit.