"Did you see how calmly she stood there as they handed her the medal? If it'd been me, I would've been bawling."
"I know. I haven't seen her shed a single tear the whole ceremony. She must still be in shock, the poor thing."
"Or maybe she and her husband weren't that close? I've heard some rumors about those female officers--"
"She's so brave, standing there."
"I'm glad it wasn't me."
She's spent all day listening to them talk about her behind her back, after they'd shaken her hand and expressed their 'condolences'.
They didn't understand, none of them did. Her family, to their credit, were trying, but it wasn't enough. They were either police officers, or wives of police officers, no one understood what it was like to have to be both.
She turns down multiple offers of rides home or places to stay for awhile. She needs some time to be on her own, away from everyone's grieving.
The ride home is quiet, and exhaustion that she's fought all week begins to seep into her body. She pulls into her driveway just in time. She lets the dog out, feeds the bird, removes her make up, and takes a shower. Stepping into the bedroom, still drying her hair when she realizes she didn't make this bed this morning. Joe normally--
Refusing to fall into her memories, she drops her towel and starts putting the bed in order, pulling the sheets straight and tucking them into tight hospital corners. She smoothes the comforter, and adjusts the pillows.
She finds him as she's searching for the decorative pillow underneath the bed. Familiar eyes glimmer in the half light, seeming to say, "Let go. You can trust me."
The tears sting her eyes as she pulls Steven out, brushing off the dust bunnies that have collected on his fur.
"No offense honey, it's great to see that at one time you were a sweet innocent little girl," Joe laughs as she punches his shoulder. "But he kind of creeps me out."
"I
was never sweet," She murmurs, plucking Steven out of his grasp,
tossing him behind the bed before she pounces on Joe, intent on
proving that she's not so 'innocent' either...
The sobs
shake her body and she clutches Steven desperately to her chest,
remembering one of the best things about her oldest friend: his fur
hid tears so well.