I do not own Naruto. And neither do you. If, for some reason, you actually do own it, you might want to lock your door.

Wow, this is creepy.

I never thought I would get a response to my chapter so fast. That was really unexpected for me.

Might as well get on with it.

It was during breakfast that Naruto suddenly twitched.

Some of the other children gave him surprised looks, but upon seeing his blank stare they went back to eating.

Naruto continued to stare into nowhere, since he was very confused right now.

He remembered going to places in this orphanage where he wasn't allowed to and getting slapped by one of the guardians of the orphanage because he was somewhere he shouldn't be. That wasn't something new for him, but it baffled him that he didn't remember what he did after that. It was also strange that his cheek felt completely normal, while normally he would feel pain in his cheek for some time after getting slapped.

Maybe it had something to do with the headache he had since he woke up.

Having lost his appetite he decided to go back to sleep, since he was tired.

A nondescript guardian was currently walking towards Naruto's room, since he couldn't find the brat anywhere else. He was angry, unsettled and a bit scared. His day had been completely fine, until a few minutes ago. His shift hadn't even started yet, when suddenly the door to the employee's room opened and the small figure of the demon brat had walked in, looking around in curiosity.

After the guardian had gotten over his brief shock, he had started shouting.

"What are you doing here! This room is off limits for children!"

But the brat had ignored him, walking deeper into the room while still looking around.
This made him even more angry. He, like most of Konoha, had lost some family in the kyuubi's attack two years ago, and he would have liked nothing better than to see the cursed child dead.

Not being allowed to speak about the demon didn't make it better, so he stood up.

"Look at me brat! You better get out of here fast or I'll throw you out!"

The brat had still ignored him and proceeded to open a drawer that apparently caught his attention.

The guardian was now behind him and upon seeing what Naruto was doing, decided to slap the damned monster.

He didn't expect the small boy, who had fallen to the ground after getting slapped, to burst into smoke though.

Now he stood there, in the once again empty room, trying to process what just happened. Unfortunately for Naruto, he wasn't a ninja and assumed he had been pranked by the kid. And he was not amused.

Finally he was in front of the door to the demons room.

A loud noise roughly woke him up.

"Get up, brat! And tell me what you've done! Now!"

Trying to blink away the sleep, he sat up in his bed. But before he could do anything else he was grabbed around the neck and lifted up. He reached up with his hands to pry himself loose, but he could do nothing against the strength of the adult holding him up. The only thing he could do was to look at his attacker fearfully.

"Still not talking, huh? I'll ask you once more, why where you in the employ's room?"

"W-what?"

"Not one hour ago! What did you do in the room? Why were you sneaking around? Answer me!"

"D-don't know", he was crying by now, his neck hurt, he could hardly breathe and his head ached more than ever.

Seeing the kid degenerating into sobs and cries, the guardian sighed and tossed him back on his bed and proceeded to walk out of the room.

Just before he closed the door he turned to the still crying Naruto.

"You won't be sniffing around anymore today, demon. Maybe this will teach you a good lesson."

With that, he closed the door and locked it.

Naruto actually cried himself to sleep. When he woke up again it was already night.

His head felt better now, but his confusion was greater than ever. He remembered... stuff, but it was all foggy and weird.

He knew one thing though, he needed to get out of this room, preferably without being seen.

Luckily, he had an actual window in his room, and while it was too high for his current body to reach, it would be no problem for an adult.

So he did the logical thing and transformed into the guardian from before. With a barely audible 'poof' and a bit of smoke he changed into the appearance of the adult, an easy task he had done countless times before, hadn't he?

After opening the window, he reminded himself that it would be bad if he suddenly disappeared and created a bunshin of himself before jumping out.

He had been very lucky.

He had slept for so long that it was almost dawn, and many shops were already open.

After he had eaten a quick breakfast that he paid with some money he was able to steal from a bag, he was now wandering the streets of Konoha without a goal in mind. His thoughts were also a bit cleaner now.

He was Uzumaki Naruto.

He was two years old.

He knew... stuff.

That was the strange part. He knew things, but it felt like he should have known more. Walking through the city he realised that he was vaguely familiar with most things, but mostly in name. One shop he passed sold teriyaki, he knew that, but he didn't remember what teriyaki was.

He also noticed that those gaps in knowledge frustrated him to no end.

He knew that teriyaki was food, that much was obvious after he looked at the shop, but he didn't know why that food was called teriyaki.

This continued on and on as he walked through the streets, until he found himself in front of what he assumed was a library. Feeling that this would help him, he entered the building.

Books.

So. Many. Books.

So much knowledge.

In the middle of the library was standing one Uzumaki Naruto, currently disguised as a random civilian, with a dreamy expression that looked quite out of place on this serious adult's face. He then walked up to one bookshelf and grabbed the first book that seemed to be interesting and started to read.

Around him, several more civilians of varying ages and genders did the same.

Several weeks later:

Naruto's life had changed a lot since that day. He only slept at the orphanage nowadays and created a bunshin after waking up. He spent much time in the libraries of Konoha and, after he acquired some more money, its bookshops. He found an unused shed in the industrial part of the city and used it to store the precious books.

Even after filling the gaps in his memory, he wasn't satisfied at all. He realised that he had very little understanding of interactions between people and the strange looks he got annoyed him.

So he begun spying on people.

He spied on people who were talking to each other.

He spied on people who were doing various jobs. How one hacked wood. How a woman bargained about clothes. How a barkeeper handled multiple customers. How a blacksmith worked. How two shinobi bought their equipment. About what four women chatted while drinking tea. How to brew tea.

And generally everything.

And after some time, the strange looks disappeared while he talked to people. And now most of them talked a lot more. He guessed it was because he didn't feel 'strange' to them anymore.

But it wasn't enough.

It was, of course, his young self that caused trouble.

By falling out of his bed. And thereby going 'poof'.

Fortunately, he had another kagebushin in the vicinity of the orphanage at the time and was able to replace the lost him before something too bad happened.

But it made him realise the flaw in his current daily proceedings. A flaw that had to be fixed soon, because he had unfortunately drawn the attention of one female guardian who didn't absolutely hate him. She had noticed that he was often alone and barely ever took part in the activities that were taking place at the orphanage for the children.

She thought he was lonely and shy and went out of her way to include him in the daily activities. This lead to the young him having to make up a lot of excuses for why he couldn't play dodge ball with the other kids.

But he also couldn't have his actual body there, he needed it to do some basic work to earn a bit of cash so that he could buy more books. And food while he wasn't at the orphanage.

"Wait a second...", mused a brown haired girl which was eating in a restaurant. The young him always ate at the orphanage, he had to so he wouldn't raise any suspicions. But where did that food go? Every time he dispersed the bunshin left nothing behind unless one counted the smoke. The answer for that question was surprisingly easy to find.

He remembered it.

A kage bunshin was a construct of chakra that simulated a fully functional body. As it was created for reconnaissance, a kage bunshin had to be able to eat, but also to vanish without a trace. Therefore the kage bunshin's chakra literally destroyed all food that it consumed. That process actually shortened the duration of said bunshin as it consumed chakra for this task.

But that wasn't the point.

It had only served to remind him of something else he already knew.

Later that evening the girl sat in front of a pile of meat and bones that were stolen from a butchery with a wooden bowl filled with cold ramen on top. And to make things even stranger, all of it was covered in lines of blood. Her blood to be specific. Those lines connected everything in the pile and also led to a small circle in front of the pile.

The girl took a deep breath and performed a series of handsigns before slamming her hands down on the small circle.

After a few minutes of nothing happening besides the blood glowing a bit, the pile suddenly imploded... while it exploded into smoke at the same time. Once the obligatory smoke cleared, the form of young Naruto could be seen once again, this time though, he was naked.

The girl giggled and blushed appropriately to the situation before handing him a set of clothes.

"What's so funny? I'm just another you after all."

"It's all about appearance, you know. I am a girl right now, so I act like a girl."

"Like I didn't know that already..."

"You're no fun, you know that?"

"I'm two years old! I should be unable to even know sarcasm! And here I am, using it!"

"Just get henge'd so you can go to the orphanage and replace yourself at the orphanage."

With that, young Naruto changed into the form of a nondescript civilian and left the shed.

It was a truly weird jutsu. It created a chakra construct not unlike a kage bunshin but connected it to an amount of existing matter, preferably something like flesh and bones, to give it a few advantages over a normal bunshin. It had, of course, some drawbacks.

It needed some supplies that were not always at hand in the field, for example. One could replace the bones and meat with something similar, but it always needed a bowl of ramen, and the bowl needed to be made out of something organic. Additionally it took a ton of chakra to make it work, so it was unavailable to most ninjas.

However, it was able to create a semi-stable construct that could take some hits before falling apart. And it was able to actually eat and use the food to complete itself. While upon creation it was nothing more than lumps of flesh being held together with chakra, it could use the consumed food to replace the chakra with actual matter. It was a slow process, usually lasting several months, but the final product was a fully functional human body.

And the best part was that this body still had some properties of a kage bunshin.

When the new body created kage bunshin of itself, and these bunshins dispersed, all their knowledge was transferred to both bodies. And since a kage bunshin, upon creation, knew everything the original knew, once it dispersed, all that knowledge was transferred to the first body.

The girl chuckled once again to herself.

"Ramen bunshin no jutsu completed."

And done!

Even though it has been less then one day between the intro/teaser and this chapter, a lot has changed, since I now know where I want to go with this. the changes are:

Rating is now M.

Genre is now set to just Horror, but that might again change.

The rest were mostly changes of plans in my head.

Now I feel the need to address a few things.

Things old Naruto sent back are (including, but not limited to):

Kage bunshin no jutsu

A 'true' henge like it is used in many other fanfictions (easiest example should be Chunin Exam Day)

A thirst for knowledge (that comes from old Naruto spending many years on research)

Some other minor things, mostly what I would call Utility Everyday Knowledge.

Betaed