A/N According to fanfiction, I have received 870 hits for this story. Do you know what that means?...
WE'RE ALMOST AT A THOUSAND HITS! Thank you all so so so much! This really means a lot to me. *sniffle*
Thank you to: TheFeyRa, frostbird, and CindyMedeiros for reviewing! And if anyone wanted to know, Gaara won for the last poll.
Lots of GaaSaku in this chapter.
Disclaimer: Naruto and its characters do not belong to me.
Would you like me to hold your hand,
Or will you be okay?
Sakura
November fifth, it is.
Gaara still hasn't come to school.
But after the birthday incident, maybe she just doesn't care anymore.
Sakura is actually wondering how he managed to get away with so many absent days. Until Naruto bluntly tells her that his father is rich.
Every night, she dreams of white-hot flames licking her, engulfing her, cutting her view from the stars…
Since the stars are all she has and they hate her too.
Kiba isn't the same, but he still laughs and makes jokes, but they just don't have that spark anymore.
Hinata is unstable most days, but she somehow always manages to laugh and talk with everyone else, usually in Naruto's embrace.
She walks and talks with Hinata, Naruto, and sometimes Sasuke. Sasuke seems nice enough, but he nervous, whenever he meets eyes with her.
One day, she can't stand it anymore.
Her hair is everywhere, strands of pink falling on her tattered clothes, and she is dying inside.
Sakura knows that she is worried.
She's taking art, just like the voice said she would. She is happy, being with Hinata. Kurenai-sensei is nice enough, and praises her art skills, no matter how bad they are.
"Can you pass me the yellow, Sakura-chan?"
She passes the Hyuuga the yellow, and the timid girl takes it, quietly thanking her.
Sakura observes her friend. Naruto is across from them, loudly talking to Sasuke.
"Hinata, you're okay, right?"
The indigo-haired girl turns her head. "K-Kiba is-"
"He's fine." (He just has a broken heart)
She shakes her head. "You know he's not."
They are silent for the rest of the period. Sakura's heart begs her to talk, to comfort, to do anything to break this chain of hurt.
But she doesn't.
The last bell rings, and she is out like a rocket, speeding towards her locker. She bumps into someone, making them squeak and fall over.
It's Ino, her beautiful face now stained with smeared makeup. Her eyes are red and puffy.
"I-I'm sorry! Here, I'll-"
"Get away from me you bitch!" She screams. "Monster! You ruined my life!"
Ino waves her arms about, causing her books to scatter all around her.
"Ino!"
A calm, deep voice approaches them, and Ino freezes.
"S-Shikamaru…"
Temari is right behind the ponytailed boy, looking uncomfortable when she sees Sakura. Sakura glares at her, telling her silently, "Stay."
Ino looks away from the boy's eyes.
"Troublesome," Shikamaru snorts, his gaze ice-cold. "I thought you said you wouldn't get involved with her anymore, Ino."
Ino hurries to pick up all her books, and then runs away darkly, fuming. Shikamaru sighs, and turns to Sakura. "I'm sorry about that."
(He silently cares, you know.)
"I need to talk to Temari."
Shikamaru nods, understanding. He walks away, leaving the two girls alone.
"You're going to ask about Gaara, aren't you?"
"He hasn't been coming to school for almost two weeks. How is he?" Sakura is surprised at how steady her voice is.
"I still don't know why you ask." Temari sighs. "He's okay… Well, as okay as usual. He always locks himself up in his room, sometimes playing violin… Baki hardly visits us anymore, you wouldn't know him, and well… I'm at work a lot, father is…"
Sakura sees the uneasiness in the blonde's eyes. "Where do you live?"
"Up the road some ways, big house, two floors. It's pale."
"Can you take me there?"
Temari blinks. "Why?" No one had ever... asked voluntarily to go see their house.
"I want to see Gaara. I need to know that he's okay myself. And Naruto asked." She adds that last part in. Temari stares at her in amazement.
"Suit yourself." She shrugs, and goes toward the entrance. "I'll wait for you."
Sakura runs to her locker and gets her stuff. She goes to the entrance to find Temari in a limo.
"How did you get this?"
Temari frowns. "Work. Now get in."
The older girl sees her hesitation, and snorts. "Do I look like a kidnapper to you?"
Sakura laughs humorlessly, and gets in beside Temari.
Big.
The first word that comes into my head.
Big.
The house is big
The lawn is big
The windows are big…
Everything is big.
Even the fear that are in my eyes
And in Temari's.
"H-Have you seen him?"
Temari's hand sweeps through
One of the unreal stars.
"No."
The house is messy.
Random bags
And cups
And papers
Are scattered all over.
But the house
Holds no stench
Of beer.
"There you go.
Now I have to go
To work.
Leave whenever you want to,
And the moment he starts to lose his temper
Run away.
Got it?"
I nod
She exits
Leaving me alone.
I hear a faint clicking noise
From beside the kitchen
And look inside
To see a man
Typing away at the computer.
I slowly back away
And go to find Gaara
In this maze of a house.
Sakura goes up the creaky stairs, taking each step with caution. She peers into every room, taking a quick peak before coming out and moving onto the next one.
She stops at one of the rooms. It smells like fresh ginger, and inside there are a few photos. Most of them are of a single woman, her smile like the sun and hair the perfect shade of Temari's. The rest of the pictures (two, to be exact) are of a boy who is wearing some kind of cat-eared hat and face paint.
In one of the pictures, he's smiling and holding up a little puppet on strings, showing them to a little red-haired boy who is smiling as well.
In the other picture, he has one arm wrapped around Temari, and the other wrapped around the woman from the other pictures.
Posed at the center of the room are two portraits, one of the woman and the other of the boy, except without the hat and face paint. The smell of fresh flowers linger beside the two wooden frames, but doesn't spread.
A memorial. Sakura realizes.
Darting out of the room, she takes care to be quiet.
But there's still no sign of that red-haired boy.
Why are you even doing this? She pondered. Why does he matter to you?
(You want to save the boy with no dreams…)
At the end of the hallway, there is a door. It just looks like she should avoid going in. It's colored pitch black.
And the doorknob is red.
Gulping, Sakura steps into the room. She is greeted by a gush of autumn wind, and she shivers a bit, and notices the open window.
She also realizes, after a heartbeat later, that there is a skylight, and the window is painted on the wall.
Closing the door behind her, she looks around the room. It is plain, a desk, chair, closet, bookshelf, violin case…
There are some odd things too. Like the cacti that are hanging from the wall, in front of drawings of wavy lines, red scribbles, notes, letters, all taped to the wall. They are everywhere except on the far side of the room, where the painted-on window is. And a bed is not seen.
The walls and floors are dusty and the color of white sand. On the bookshelf, there are mostly music sheets and sketch pads, one photo that has the woman she saw before and someone else that looks almost like the other, both of them smiling and waving at the camera.
"What are you doing in this room?"
Sakura turns around sharply; to see the boy she's been looking for standing right behind her, eyes blank. Gaara isn't showing any signs that he is mad that she's in this room, nor does he call it 'his' room even when it clearly is.
"Well?"
"I didn't see you coming."
He frowns, but it disappears. Walking around her, he pours a tiny bit of water onto each cactus plant.
"Where did you come from?"
He tips his head towards the side of the black door, where there is another door. Sakura realizes it is a bathroom.
"I haven't watered them this month." He deadpans. Light streams in from the window overhead.
"Why don't you put a window over there," Sakura points to the painted-on window "Instead of up there?"
Gaara's face becomes dark, and he doesn't answer. She notes his messed up hair, wrinkled clothes (black t-shirt and jeans), slight limp, and dark circles around his eyes. Darker than usual, at least. There is a gourd on his back, slightly larger than him.
His wrist is still wrapped with the strip of cloth she had put on, and it was dirty and soaked with dried blood. There are still no stars.
The boy settles down on the floor, and takes out a book and starts reading. She feels awkward, standing in the room of someone she barely knows.
"I like your cacti." She blurts out, not knowing what else to say. Gaara looks up at her questioningly, but nods and goes back to his reading.
"You should change your bandages, you know."
He shrugs. His light green eyes reflect the light.
"Gaara," She says each word slowly, choosing carefully. "Why aren't you coming to school anymore? Naruto's worried about you. He's the reason I-I'm here."
Gaara ignores the stumble at the last part, and looks up at her. "He's worried? About me?"
"Isn't he your friend?"
"Friend." He repeats, playing with the word. "Is that what friends do?"
"Yes. Why aren't you coming to school?"
"There's no point." He shrugs.
"It was Naruto's birthday. You missed it."
When he gives no answer, she continues. "Have you heard what happened at the party? There was a fire."
Gaara seems to stiffen a bit, but doesn't show it as he turns the page. "So?"
"He's your friend."
It's hopeless, Sakura knows. He doesn't feel love.
"Aren't you worried about him?"
"He'll die later anyways."
"Come to school." This time, she says it, orders it. She looks at the worn away cloth of white around his wrist. "I'll change your bandages."
Gaara frowns, but doesn't push her away when she starts to take off his bandages around his wrist.
"Don't you have a father? Or close family member?"
He glares, the large gourd on his back shaking a bit. Drips of glittering sand falls from the cracks.
"Stop asking me stuff like that." He murmurs, looking blank as Sakura wraps the bandages. The skin around the wound is yellow, smeared with drops of brownish-red. "Why do you care? I'm dangerous." He spits out the word.
This is getting nowhere. Sakura thinks. Looking around the room once more, she misses the multi-colored stars that usually surround her.
"Don't you want to have a good future?"
Gaara turns his head, pulling away from her. He flinches when she grabs his other wrist. The redhead jerks his wrist out of her hands violently, and pushes her over with his gourd. "Don't touch me!"
But weirdly, there's no anger in his voice. It's blank. His eyes no emotion, they're blank like his voice. Like his heart.
She winces when there's a jolt of pain as she tries to get up. But Sakura ignores it. Softly, she whispers,
"Can't you love?"
No reply, but a flinch and maybe a flash of anger in his eyes at the four-letter word. Sakura notices this, and gets a bit uneasy.
But she still dares to ask the next question.
"Aren't you happy?"
It seems like years after he answers her, voice filled with nothing.
"No."
I feel bad now.
He motions at me
To leave
With a little glare
And I walk out.
The man is still there
Typing away.
I want to scream
And shout
"Don't you care?"
But... how he talked about Naruto.
Naruto, who's trying so hard to be friends.
Everyone here is heartless.
Gaara is back in school the next day.
Gaara is back in school the next day.
A/N Short chapter, sorry about that. =( the next one will be longer though, promise! Reviews make the author happy. :3 If you have any questions or suggestions, feel free to PM me or leave it in a review.