Chapter 6
Xion is watching TV. Roxas is sleeping and Thasmox is attaching detonator mines to his face. Zexion walks in and makes him bow down to Roxas with his elemental powers.
He's losing his touch already, Xion thought.
"Shut up in there!" Larxene yelled.
"That's enough Thasmox," Zexion said placing him on the couch next to Xion.
"This is cool," Xion said watching the show Sephiroth's Killfest.
"Oh sweet, It's on now!" Thasmox asked ecstatically
"Yup," Xion responded gleefully.
"Turn it up!" Larxene yelled.
"No f***ing way!" Xion said.
"Demyx, Vexen. So glad you could make it. I'd like you to do something," Xemnas announced.
"Name it Xemnas," Vexen said.
"I want you two to go to that one castle where Xaldin went and collect hearts," Xemnas replied.
"Whax, Xy can'xt xou xend Axel xand Marluxia? Demyx complained.
"Same reason you can't convince Roxas that Dark Corridors aren't the gateways to Hell unless they were opened by Girl Roxas," Vexen replied.
"Yeah, plus I'm trying to get special hearts. Hearts from Bulky Venders," Xemnas said.
"What?" Vexen complained more outraged than Demyx was.
"F*** your complaints. If you don't do this mission, we will truly be Organization XIII,"
"Fine," Vexen replied accepting the facts. You gotta do what you gotta do, or in Larxene's case, who.
"Xno," Demyx pleaded.
Xigbar appeared prepared to ask Xemnas for a raise. Vexen took one of his guns, shot Xigbar and aimed it at his own head.
"Xi Dox't wanx xo wix Vexen, he'lx xturn thix inxo onxe joxe faxory," Demyx sobbed.
"Damn right," Vexen coughed.
"Gonna get you," Larxene said sticking needles in a Marluxia voodoo doll.
"Thasmox, Zexion's at the supermarket, this is our only chance to prank Roxas."
"I'll look at your novel later Xion, I'm watching Sephiroth," Thasmox whispered.
"Fine, I'll do it myself," Xion replied. She takes a grenade she stole from Thasmox and placed it in Roxas' mouth. She rushes back to the couch without noticing she forgot to pull the pin off. Zexion appears, takes it out, pulls the pin off, and throws it at Thasmox.
Xion runs but Thasmox sits there watching Sephiroth.
Marluxia and Lexaeus are still trying to find out Xaldin's secret shame. Lexaeus is fine but Marluxia is still vomiting because he had to taste his own blood from Saix' brush.
"Okay, let's keep going," Lexaeus yelled.
"I'm fine now!" Marluxia said.
They go on following the map until about three hours later, two of those involving swimming until they end up in a different world.
"Wow, this place has so many flowers!" Marluxia cheered.
"So?" Lexaeus asked taking a small look around.
"Lighten up, this place is beautiful, the flowers, the ocean… the flowers," Marluxia explained.
"Okay, have this coconut," Lexaeus laughed as he tossed it at Marluxia's head. He catches in his mouth and bites into it with enormous fangs.
"Why do you have fangs?" Lexaeus asked.
"You never noticed?" Marluxia asked.
"No," Lexaeus answered.
"I get a good vibe from this place, same as my last visit," Marluxia said.
"Where are we?" Lexaeus asked.
"Destiny Islands," Marluxia answered.
"I'm gonna kill myself!" Larxene yelled.
Thasmox wasn't watching TV because Sephiroth wasn't on.
"Thasmox, look at my webpage!" Roxas said.
Thasmox went over and looked at it. There were four folder files. They were labeled as follows.
1: News and Gossip
2: Images
3: Roxas' Weekly Word of Wisdom
4: Xion
"Pretty neat, right?" Roxas asked.
Thasmox hesitated for a second. He than fell back on the floor and started laughing like a hyena.
"Glad you like it," Roxas said.
After twenty minutes, he stops laughing.
"Get me a knife Thasmox, I'm going for suicide," Larxene yelled.
"This reminds me of a time when I was eleven,"
(Flashback)
*Another thing of Thomas*
Thomas was walking into the kitchen in his house to take out a knife. His mom grabs his arm, takes the knife and puts it back. He then goes up to his room and takes out his katana. His dad takes it and destroys it. Than he takes out a rope and ties it to a tree branch. Then he picks up his cat.
(End Flashback)
"And then I think I was tased by a cop for animal cruelty, or it was an animal cruelty misunderstanding. I was trying to see if cats can climb rope. The blades were just decoration," Thasmox finished explaining.
"What does that have to do with Larxene's supposed murder-suicide consideration?" Xion asked.
"The blade part of it relates," Thasmox said.
"Hey Larxene, if this pregnancy is bothering you, why not try doing the A-word?" Roxas recommended.
"What does that have to do with anything?" Larxene asked.
"I think he means an abortion," Xion said.
"That's a great idea, but how do you two know about that?" Larxene said.
"I was asking Zexion some questions, and one of them led to what was an abortion. He told me and I told Roxas and he screamed for five hours straight," Xion explained.
"I'm gonna find Vexen!" Larxene yelled.
Demyx and Vexen arrived at Beast's Castle to do their retarded mission. There were scratch marks all over the walls.
"This is strange," Vexen said.
"Thix ix nox recox, Vexen," Demyx yelled.
"No, this text message from Larxene. She wants an A-B-O-R-T-I-O-N," Vexen answered.
"Whyx ix thax xa problex?" Demyx said.
"I lied to Larxene, she's not pregnant. You suffered doing some more work for nothing," Vexen confessed.
Demyx' eye starts twitching. "Hand me your shield for a second!" Demyx said angrily and somehow, no X's. Vexen complies and Demyx smashes his sitar over his head.
Saix and Zexion were now facing Xemnas.
"We need to do something about Thasmox' retarded behavior and Demyx being a sloth, also not to mention Larxene," Zexion said.
"Well, Thasmox is not bad…"
"Are you kidding me, he nearly kills Roxas several times every day!" Zexion yells interrupting Xemnas.
"I'll teach Demyx a lesson by turning him into a Dusk!" Xemnas answered.
"You've done that," Saix said.
"Your point being, Saix?" Xemnas moaned sarcastically.
Larxene uses a dark corridor and enters the room.
"So, Demyx and Thasmox are a problem!" Zexion stuttered noticing her.
"You forgot about the pregnant demoness!" Saix mentioned out of his stupidity.
"You won't have to worry about me because once I find Vexen, he's giving me an A-word," Larxene said.
"What's that have to do with this?" Saix asked.
"She means an abortion, I told Xion and Xion told Roxas and Roxas screamed for five hours straight," Zexion said.
Everyone was silent for the next ten minutes.