Oh my gosh! I missed you all sooooo much! I know, you're all wondering "Where the HELL have you BEEN?" and the truth? I've been here. It's my final week of school this week and I've been scrambling to get everything finished, because it's also my last week of high school. I will be graduating on the 7th of June and I'm both excited and terrified. I am sad and happy and everything in between. It's been absolute chaos here in my house, so you'll have to forgive me for being late on updating.
Okay, last chapter, I asked you all what you wanted to see: A moment between Brown and Mitchie or Shane and Peggy splitting up. Some of you were all like "KICK IT INTO HIGH GEAR! SPLIT PEGGY AND SHANE UP!" and then some were like "You know, I want Smitchie, but I don't want the story to go by too fast, so do a Brown and Mitchie moment" and then one person said that they would love to see the group all cool with each other again, and honestly, I would LOVE to see that too!
So, to see what direction I went in, read now! :)
"Seriously? Mitchie you're crazy!" Caitlyn exclaimed as Nate and I sat her down and explained our plan. I felt my heart fall slightly at Caitlyn calling my plan crazy. Scratch that, calling me crazy for planning something so crazy.
"Hey, it's not that bad of an idea Caitlyn," Nate said, defending me.
"Nate, Tess is not going to come to anything she doesn't have to be at if Mitchie is going to be there," Caitlyn said.
"Look, I know that Tess doesn't really like me. Nobody likes me all that much, but I need you guys to get her to the bonfire. I just have something that I'd like to share with the group," I said quietly, breaking through their oncoming argument. Caitlyn sighed and reluctantly nodded.
"Alright, I'll make sure Tess gets there, but that means no bailing out Mitchie," Caitlyn said. I nodded, knowing what I was doing.
"Alright. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go bug Brown," I said, skipping out of the cabin. I walked with a slight skip in my step over to Brown's office and poked my head in, but didn't see him anywhere. I shrugged and decided to go get a bottle of water from the kitchen. I opened the door and instead of seeing the staff bustling around like usual, there stood Brown, wearing an apron and working hard on some sort of pastry.
"What are you doing in here?" I asked, startling him. I grinned at his surprised expression.
"Hello Mitchie," Brown said, grimacing as he held his hand over his chest in a failed attempt to calm his fast heartbeat.
"Hey Brown, but seriously, what are you doing in here?" I asked as he turned back to his cooking.
"Well, I was attempting Brownies. Get it? Brown's Brownies?" he said. I chuckled slightly, more for him than anything.
"You have too much egg it looks like," I observed. I pulled a mixing bowl out of the cupboard and began gathering ingredients. I commanded Brown to pour certain amounts of certain ingredients at certain times and soon his brownies were in the oven. I turned to him and pointed at the streak of chocolate on his face.
"You've got a little something on your face there Brown," I said, wiping a bit more chocolate on him.
"Oh do I Mitchie? Well it looks like you've got some flour in your hair," he said, throwing flour in my hair, "Or is it still called Chinese Body Powder?"
I couldn't stop the blush and threw some flour at him, resulting in a flour war. Never, in a million years, would I have imagined having a flour fight with Brown Cessario. I was laughing and ducking out of the way as clumps of flour came flying at me.
"Dad! Stop it!" I exclaimed giggling. Neither of us stopped. Neither of us had even noticed. We just continued to throw flour at each other until a timer beeped, indicating that the brownies were complete. I opened the oven and pulled out a perfect batch of brownies.
"I would have to say that these are going to be the best batch of brownies that I've ever made," Brown said. I laughed and nodded.
"Alright, now just cut them up. I've gotta go take a shower," I said. Brown nodded and waved goodbye as I ran back to my cabin. I threw open the door and saw Caitlyn gathering up a bunch of stuff for what looked like a day at the beach.
"Whoa. I thought you were going to bug Brown," she said.
"Yeah, and it turned into a flour war," I said simply. Caitlyn laughed.
"So why do you want to do this bonfire exactly?" she asked.
"I just…have to apologize to everyone. Tess included," I said. Caitlyn nodded in understanding.
"Mitchie…be honest here. Are you trying to get Shane back?" Caitlyn asked. I shook my head.
"No. He made his choice to be with Peggy. I can't do anything about it," I said honestly. She nodded her head.
"Okay…so I'll see you in an hour at the bonfire?" she asked. I nodded and smiled.
"See you then."
I could hear Tess from 20 feet away from her. She was complaining that she didn't want to have a bonfire when it was looking like it was about to rain. It's true. It probably wasn't the best night to have a bonfire, but I didn't feel like asking Nate and Caitlyn to tell everyone to reschedule it.
"Trust me Tess. This will be worth it," Caitlyn said.
"But what if it rains? Then the fire will go out AND my hair will be messed up," she said. I smiled lightly at Tess' logic.
"Look, can we just get it over with?" Shane asked. I could tell he was as impatient with Tess, probably for the same reasons that she had already expressed.
"Sure. If everything is ready, we'll just get started," Caitlyn said, loud enough for me to hear. I chuckled lightly as everyone looked at her strangely. I started making my way towards the camp fire that was finally reaching my height. I stepped into everyone's view and smiled sheepishly at everyone.
"Fuck this!" Tess explained and stood to leave, but Caitlyn grabbed her arm.
"Wait. I just need to say something," I called out to her. She turned and I saw something in her eyes. Fear. She was scared?
"I know that I don't deserve the time of day coming from any of you…but just give me a minute and then you can leave if you'd like," I said. Tess stared at me, seeing if I was going to pull any sort of bullshit. But this wasn't the time for little games. I needed to take this time to apologize. Really apologize. She must have sensed that, because she sat down slowly, next to Caitlyn and Ella. I inhaled deeply and looked at the people I had such a strong connection with.
"I want to start by apologizing. I should have never, ever made the decision that you guys didn't need to know what was going on in my life. I understand that I hurt you all by ignoring your attempts to contact me and I regret never returning your calls or texts or e-mails," I said. I inhaled to continue but I was cut off.
"If you're asking for our forgiveness, then you're not going to get it from me," Tess said. I felt my heart clench, but I knew that, to an extent, Tess was sad and bitter.
"I'm not asking for you to all forgive me right away. I don't deserve anybody's forgiveness," I said. I felt tears well up in my eyes as memories from that night flooded my memory.
"It's my fault. For everything. It's my fault that you're all angry at me. It's my fault that my mother sent me here for the summer. It's my fault that my only friend at home is no longer my friend. And it's my fault my father died. It's all my fault and I don't deserve your forgiveness. I just…I just want you all to know how sorry I am," I said, a few tears falling down my face. I never cried in front of people. Or at least, I tried to never cry in front of people. But these weren't just people. These were my friends. Or at least, they were.
I was tired. I was tired of putting up the wall of defense. I was tired of acting like a bitch to cover up my hurt. I was tired of fighting with my mom. I was tired of pushing away my fears.
I sat on the stump in front of my friends and put my head on my knees and broke down. I cried, long and hard. I hadn't cried like this since the night of the murder. I hadn't broken down. I could feel this sense of relief wash over me when I felt the presence of someone in front of me. I lifted my head lightly and saw Tess' blue eyes staring at my teary brown ones. She pulled a little cloth out of her purse and lifted my head lightly.
She wordlessly wiped at my eyes and I smelt the familiar scent of makeup remover. I didn't protest as she worked wordlessly on my other eye. I felt the cloth move all over my face, removing all traces of my mask. She finally got to my lips and stopped. There was one crucial part of this new image that had to be removed; my signature "Sweet Burgundy" lipstick. I didn't move. I kept my eyes closed. I heard a little bit of shuffling, but ignored it, figuring that it was Shane or Nate being impatient, as always.
My heart skipped a beat as a pair of strong hands grabbed my chin and began wiping the lipstick off. When the makeup remover wipe left my face, I felt calloused thumbs wipe my tears away. I opened my eyes and saw Shane staring into them. He backed away slightly, letting everyone come into my view again.
Tess walked up to me and looked me straight in the eyes.
"Hi there Mitchie. Long time, no see," she said quietly. I smiled lightly. She opened her arms wide and I happily accepted the embrace, breaking down once again in tears of relief. Everything was getting back on track. I felt Peggy, Shane, Ella, Jason, Caitlyn and Nate surround me and turn it into a large group hug.
I was finally home.
Tada! I made everything okay with the group again, there was a small scene with Brown and Mitchie (small, but obvious crucial!) and then there was a tiny hint at Smitchie, but not big enough to make an impact. Or is it? :O
Anyways, I'm going to try and update on Friday because that is going to be my half day at school and I'll have all morning. If not, I'll try to find some time over the weekend to update. So I'd love to get to 20 reviews by Friday, but I'll settle with 13. I think it can be done. You've all amazed me before. I'm sure you can do it again.
So tell me what you'd like to see in the next chapter. I'm all ears! I have a blank word document that is just waiting to be filled with everybody's ideas!
If you have a twitter, then you should follow me! I'm TiannaMRamirez and you all know that you need a little "at" symbol before then, so yeah. Please follow me for updates or to give me ideas. I get those tweets to my phone, and I always have my phone with me, so I can add ideas right away!
Love you all!
Tianna