Unrequited
He was a good kisser. She could give him that.
Hojo and Kagome were on Hojo's couch. She had gone out with Eri and Yuka to a club and had a little too much to drink. She felt high and like her brain was swimming.
Kissing Hojo felt good.
He'd lowered her back onto the couch and climbed on top of her. He seemed to like the sounds coming from her as he kissed her neck. He was biting a little too, and sucking. Kagome hadn't done something like this before. It felt nice.
He ran a hand over her chest. She blinked, startled. It felt good, but…
Hojo liked her. Hojo liked her a lot. Kagome just didn't feel that way. He was her friend. Just because Eri and Yuka had shoved her at him, giggling that he should take her home didn't mean she should have gone to his home.
But kissing Hojo felt good.
Her mind kept flashing back to Hiei. He hadn't shown any interest in her. He spent a lot of time around Mukuro for kami's sake!
But Kagome liked him. She liked the way his anger made her aura tingle. She liked the way he defended his friends, even though he denied liking them. She liked the way his red eyes looked in the sunlight. She liked the sense of danger she felt while around him, all the while knowing that danger was never directed toward her.
She wanted to be on that couch kissing him.
Hojo ran a hand up under her shirt. She stopped him.
"No," she whispered so quietly he couldn't hear.
He placed his hand back on top of her shirt. She pulled away.
"I – I have to go," she stuttered.
Hojo looked confused.
"Look, I know we're both… you know," she said, gesturing between them and pointedly not looking towards his pants. "But… I have to go."
"If we both are, then—"
"I know the way you feel." And she did. She knew he wanted to date her. She knew he wanted her in his bed. She also knew she couldn't do that to him. Not while she wanted Hiei so badly. "I have to go."
Kagome grabbed her purse and stumbled to his door, barefoot. She grabbed her heels in her hand and started her trek home. Hojo caught up with her and walked her home silently. She weaved a bit on the sidewalk. It was difficult to make it up the stairs.
Hojo stopped at the top. There was an awkward silence. "Goodnight," Kagome finally said.
She stumbled into her empty house, cursing as she ran into things. Maybe she'd had a little too much to drink…
The shower was warm and Kagome had a difficult time keeping herself upright. Some of it was that the water felt so nice. A good part of it was that she was drunk off her ass. After nearly falling asleep for the third time, Kagome pulled herself from the shower and went to bed.
She realized that the damp she felt on her pillow were tears. She remembered the way Hiei had put his arm around her one time and rubbed his thumb on the little piece of skin on her hip that her shirt hadn't covered. She remembered how happy she had felt.
She smiled into the pillow even as she was crying. There was a tiny bit of hope there.
"I've been slowly falling for you since the moment I met you. Your smile and the way you seem to read my mind knocks me off my feet. You brighten the room when you walk in. The more I know you, the more I want to know. Let me be strong. This week I want to tell you all this. This LGMH and so do you."
AN: Okay, so this isn't actually based on LGMH. Unfortunately, this is based on my life (sigh), but I wanted it to end on a more hopeful note and that LGMH entry was too perfect… Sorry about my extended hiatus on writing. I'm trying to rectify it!