A/N
Hi guys! No, this isn't the chapter with Raygun's special dare -smile and sweat drop- He sent me this chapter for my birthday (26) and It was so funny that decided to post it... besides, he also asked me to :) Enjoy!And now… YYH Torture, RAYGUN STYLE!
Raygun: Hi guys! As a normal average everyday reviewer for this awesome fanfic, I'd like to do a one-shot for her birthday! Of course, I got her permission, silly fangirls… and guys… its okay! Don't worry, she's perfectly fine too. She's on a vacation in Disneyland!
Yusuki: (muffled) NO I'M NOT! I'M TRAPPED INSIDE THIS CLOSET!! HELP ME AT YOUR EARLIEST INCONVENIENCE!!
Autumn: Don't you mean 'convenience?'
Yusuki: YOU GET MY POINT!!
Raygun: Whatever… Today, we are doing mine and Autumn's dares!
Autumn: What was my dare? takes out prompt card No… no… that's not it…
Raygun: Anyway, my dare! I'm so evil today!
(All the characters on the ceiling shudder in fear, except for Hiei.)
Raygun: Hmm… I'll pick the one that DOESN'T SHUDDER! Inner Me, unstrap Hiei!
Autumn: Whoa… you have an inner me?
Raygun: Doesn't everyone?
Yusuki and Inner Yusuki: (STILL MUFFLED) DUH!
Inner Raygun: (slightly emo and a really good actor) I don't get paid enough for this…
(Scratch that… really emo.)
Autumn: What's with that announcer voice?
Raygun: Dunno, don't care. Moving on…
(Hiei stands on the random "dare podium.")
Autumn: No, seriously, what's with the announcer voice? And where did we get the dare podium?
Raygun: You really are oblivious to things, aren't you?
Autumn: Yeah… about that… starts mumbling something about Jin and Lucky Charms
Raygun: That was odd… Moving on! I dare Hiei to…
(stares at Hiei for a good twenty seconds)
Yusuki: CAN WE GET ON WITH IT!
Raygun: What?
Autumn: Nani?
Raygun: whacks Autumn over the head with rolling pin STOP WRITING IN JAPANESE!
Autumn: GOMEN NASAI! hides behind Kurama
Raygun: Sorry, Hiei, I got caught up in suspense. Your dare is to…
(It's just five seconds this time…)
Inner Yusuki: Wow…--
Raygun: UNDERGO TRANS SURGERY!
Yusuki: bursts out from closet door THAT IS NOT IN THE SCRIPT!
Autumn: We have a script?
(Tumbleweed rolls by…)
Autumn: And who is that announcer voice?!
Raygun: Okay, now I'm getting sick of this. hits Autumn with rolling pin that blasts her into oblivion Anyway, moving on…
Random Voice That Sounds Very Similar To Autumn's: Hi, Raygun!
(Raygun turns to see an Autumn with very long hair, a shirt that changes color depending on her mood, and, get this, contact lenses! Raygun screams.)
Yusuki: Hey, where'd you get the shirt?
The Random Voice: Oh! I bought it at Hollister's!
Autumn: (waking up) Whoa… (creepy stare)
The Random Voice: Yes, I am Inner Autumn! (also changing subject) My shirt changes color depending on my mood?
Autumn: Really?
Inner Autumn: No.
Autumn: Really? T-T
Inner Autumn: Uh-huh! Right now, it's purple, which means I'm happy!
Raygun: What was it when you were doing the announcer voice?
Autumn: SHE WAS THE ANNOUNCER VOICE?!
Raygun: Well, we assumed you would know, she is your inner self.
Autumn: Whoops.
Inner Autumn: It was gray.
(…)
Autumn: Wait, if you were doing the announcer voice then, who's doing it now?
Raygun: Did you notice that my inner me isn't in the room.
(Hi guys!)
Raygun: Shut up, Inner Me! You are doing your announcer job!
Autumn: So like… where do you guys hang out?
Inner Yusuki: We actually compete in an international inner self poker tournament.
Raygun: So… who reins champion?
Inner Autumn: … Inner Botan.
Yusuki: WHAT?!
Autumn: NANI?!
Raygun: takes out rolling pin
Autumn: GOMEN NASAI!! again, hides behind Kurama
Raygun: Sigh… anyway, whilst Hiei is undergoing his transforming surgery into the opposite gender, everyone shudders let's do another dare!
(Raygun stares at ceiling.)
Raygun: I choose…
(RANDOM SUSPENSEFUL PARENTHESES!!)
Raygun: Koenma!
Autumn: AND I CHOOSE JIN! cackles evilly, while everyone just stares
Raygun: Autumn, you missed your turn…
Autumn: What?! runs off to emo corner
Raygun: (turns to face Koenma on dare podium) I dare you…
(stares at Koen--)
Yusuki: OH NO! WE ARE NOT DOING THIS AGAIN!
Raygun: Sigh… fine. I dare you to reveal… YOUR MOTHER!
(Okay, for some people, they may know who Koenma's mom already is. But we just want comic relief, that's all.)
Koenma: …………………………Britney Spears.
Yusuki: Gasp. O.O
Inner Autumn: Gasp. O.o
Kurama: Gasp.
Botan: Gasp. O.O
(Gasp.)
Autumn: Whoa, didn't see that coming. You do realize that was very anticlimactic.
Raygun: Sigh… whatever. Oh, I think Hiei is back from his surgery!
(A Hiei with long black hair with white highlights comes in the room. SHE has the exact same face as Hiei, and is wearing almost every gothic thing that you can possibly imagine.)
Yusuki: Oh…
Raygun: my…
Autumn: gosh…
Girl Hiei: (slightly, and I mean SLIGHTLY, higher voice.) What?
Inner Autumn: Oh my gosh, I love your outfit!
(Girl Hiei smacks Inner Autumn into oblivion.)
Raygun: Yeah… you can go have your second surgery if you want. Anyway, while Domi…
Autumn: Domi is in this chapter?
Raygun: Now he is. Anyway, while Domi gets Inner Autumn's head out of the ceiling, we have another dare, for…
(dramatic music plays)
Yusuki: You do realize how much I hate you right now.
Raygun: Of course I do! Anyway, it's for… Keiko! Your dare is to… enter in a medieval sword fighting tournament!
All: What?!
Yusuki: Can I just say that I am really proud of you at this moment?
Raygun: Of course you can! Come on guys, let's go!
(All leave the room, except for the characters on the dare ceiling.)
Botan: So, eh, been here often?
J: I have been here for seven chapters.
Botan: Oh…
(Now we move to the medieval sword fighting tournament, which is actually just a Soul Calibur tournament. Keiko is fighting Talim.)
Autumn: I DON'T KNOW WHO TO ROOT FOR!
Raygun: Shut up, the match is beginning!
Announcer: Keiko VS. Talim!
Keiko: Talim? This should be a piece of cake. know-it-all laugh
(Talim walks over and easily kicks her off the edge of the stage.)
All: O.o
Announcer: Umm… Talim wins? Wow, I think that's a new record.
Talim: Heck, yeah!
All: O.O
Yusuki: Did Talim just do something way out of character?
All: Oh yeah.
Yusuki: Wow…
Raygun: Back to the dare room!
(All characters go back to the dare room.)
Raygun: Okay… it's FINAL DARE TIME! This dare is for J!
Yusuki: YAY! random marching band bursts into room
Raygun: I dare J to… sing Happy Birthday to Yusuki and present the almighty sweet snow cake!
Autumn: I want some… (cries)
J: Darn… clears throat
(deadpan) Happy Birthday to you.
Happy Birthday… to you.
Happy Birthday… you.
Happy Birthday to you. (end deadpan.)
Yusuki: Aww, that was so sweet J!
Autumn: It's so sweet I could puke.
J: (deadpan) Now blow out the candle.
Yusuki: Do I have to? You would look so good in flames.
J: JUST DO IT!
Yusuki: Fine. blows them out
All: HAPPY BIRTHDAY YUSUKI!
Autumn: (sing-song) And many more!!
(One hour later…)
Autumn: You know, we never did find out what happened with Hiei…
(Hiei bursts into room, still a girl.)
Yusuki: Oh my gosh, I'm going to puke… runs into bathroom
Autumn: Why didn't you have a second surgery?!
Hiei: They kept mixing up my 'reason for surgery.'
Autumn: Let's just say I don't want to know… runs into bathroom after Yusuki
Raygun's A/N: WE WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY! WE WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY! WE WISH YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND AN AWESOME TODAY! Happy Birthday, Yusuki! Keep writing, cuz' you're AWSM like that! Or else…
Yusuki's A/N: Alright Raygun, lol. No worrys, I will. And the next chapter really WILL be Raygun's super-awesome-funny-tastic dare! WOOT! rofl