Simpsons vs. Harry Potter Survivor
Episode 3
Brian: Last time on Simpsons vs. Harry Potter Survivor, tension among friends surfaced in both tribes. Milhouse adamantly declined Bart's invitation to join his alliance to vote off Lisa. Meanwhile, in the Hogwarts Tribe, Ron accused Harry of trying to steal his girlfriend, Hermione, away from him.
At their first tribal council, the Hogwarts Tribe voted off Goyle, mainly because of his eating the tribe's food and not contributing positively to the team during challenges. Hermione also found out about Harry and Ron fighting over her, a revelation that left her embarrassed and shocked.
Will these broken friendships be mended? Will the Simpsons Tribe actually get a good plotline? With 14 people left, who will be voted off next? Let us pick up where we left off with Day 7.
Simpsons Tribe: Day 7
Lisa: It's been a week since we were dropped off here in Egypt, and I think our tribe has made great strides during that time. People are working harder, we finally won an immunity challenge and the Hogwarts Tribe seems to be at each other's throats. However, there has been one issue of late…
(The sun rises in Egypt as Flanders sounds his air horn to wake the tribe up.)
Flanders: Hi-diddly-ho, tribe mates! How about we pray to start the day?
(Everyone else wakes up, glaring angrily at Flanders.)
Flanders: Oh come on now, let's turn those frowns upside down.
(Bart and Homer suddenly get an idea.)
Homer: Hey Flanders, I actually have a better idea…How about a group baptism in the Nile River?
Bart: Yeah, you first Flanders!
Flanders: Why guys, that's a brilliant i-ahh!
(The rest of the Simpsons Tribe pick up Flanders, dump him in the Nile and then promptly go back to sleep. Later that day, Bart and Nelson go hunting with Milhouse tagging along.)
Bart: So Milhouse, any change of heart about my offer?
Milhouse: I'll join your alliance, on one condition.
Nelson: Gee, I wonder what that could be?
Milhouse: (ignoring Nelson) Bart, you have to promise that you won't vote for Lisa before the merger. Please, Bart? I think I might have a chance at landing a date with her.
Bart: Alright Milhouse, you got yourself a deal. Lisa will make it to the merger. Besides, I had someone else in mind to vote off next anyway.
Milhouse: Who could that be?
(Bart, Nelson and Milhouse take a brief break from hunting to discuss their alliance.)
Hogwarts Tribe, Day 7
(Harry gets ready for another fishing session. Ron, ignoring Harry since last night, stays in the hut while Neville accompanies Harry fishing.)
Harry: (sighs) I don't know what to do about Ron, Neville.
Neville: Do you have feelings for Hermione, Harry?
Harry: Yes, I've had strong feelings for her since the Yule Ball our fourth year, actually.
Neville: Soooo….would you say that Ginny is, you know, available?
Harry: (glances at Neville) You like Ginny? For how long?
Neville: As long as you've had feelings for Hermione.
Harry: (shakes his head) Well, she's all yours mate.
(Neville's face brightens up upon hearing this.)
Harry: On the other hand, I don't know if I should try to pursue a relationship with Hermione right now if it means losing my friendship with Ron.
Neville: Harry, if you love Hermione as much as I think you do, I say go for it, and eventually Ron will come around.
(Meanwhile, Hermione and Luna are out in the nearby forest of palm trees looking for edible plants.)
Hermione: I found some coconuts in this tree.
Luna: Excellent, let's take them back to camp.
(Hermione and Luna are the only ones there when they arrive back at camp.)
Luna: So, how are you holding up after last night?
Hermione: I'm fine. It's just…it's just really hard to see Harry and Ron fighting each other, especially since it's kind of my fault.
Luna: Don't blame yourself Hermione, you can't control their feelings. I'll go talk to Ron tomorrow and see if I can get him to come around.
Hermione: Thank you Luna, that puts my mind at ease a little bit.
Luna: Hermione thinks I'm talking to Ron for her, but I'm also doing it for myself. I have a certain secret that I have to get off my chest.
Simpsons Tribe, Day 8
(Lisa checks the tree-mail and finds a note in it concerning today's reward challenge. She returns the shelter to reads the challenge to her tribe mates.)
Lisa: Okay guys, it looks like we need to build some sort of sign signaling for help. Any suggestions?
Flanders: How about a giant cross to show our Christian beliefs?
(Groans emit from everyone except Flanders.)
Lisa: Okay, does anyone besides Flanders have an idea?
Milhouse: (raises his hands quickly) I got one!
Lisa: Are you just saying that to impress me?
Milhouse: No, I really have an idea.
Lisa: Alright, let's hear it.
(The tribe huddles around Milhouse to hear his plan.)
Hogwarts Tribe, Day 8
(After figuring out their plan, the Hogwarts Tribe breaks up to begin work. Ron goes into the woods to chop some wood when he is joined by Luna.)
Ron: Hey Loony, what's up?
Luna: Uhhh…Ron, I was wondering if you could find your way to, perhaps, forgiving Harry?
Ron: (shakes his head) No..can't do it!
Luna: (raising her voice slightly) Ron, have you ever considered that it's up to Hermione who she is going to date and not you?
Ron: (anger abating slightly) I know, but…
Luna: (raising her voice a little bit more) ..and have you ever considered that there may be other girls at Hogwarts that like you?
Ron: What are you getting at?
Luna: DAMNIT RONALD WEASLEY, CAN YOU NOT THINK OF ANYONE ELSE WHO MIGHT LIKE YOU?
Ron: Like who?
Luna: (calming down) I'll give you a hint…
(Luna kisses Ron on the lips. Ron is slightly taken aback at first, but then embraces the moment. The two come apart after about 15 seconds, both of them blushing. Ron breaks the silence.)
Ron: Well uh, I reckon we should get ready for the challenge.
Luna: Yeah…ummm, let's do that.
(Ron and Luna return to gathering wood.)
Day 8: Reward Challenge
Brian: (in helicopter) For this challenge, our two tribes have been given instructions to create a signal for help using any supplies they may have. Our helicopter will fly by each tribe site twice. Whichever tribe's signal is considered the best by myself, the pilot and the rescue squad experts will be the winner, and the winning tribe will receive a care package of various stuff, including toiletries, an umbrella and a comfy chair. (Looks outside the helicopter) It looks like we're about the pass the Hogwarts Tribe, so let's see what they got.
[The Hogwarts Tribe's signal is "HELP" spelled out in stones with a wooden border surrounding the word. The seven tribe members stand around the sign with their torches lit.]
Brian: Okay, now let's see what the Simpsons Tribe has to offer.
[The Simpsons Tribe has formed a pyramid, with Lisa on top holding a piece of wood with "HELP" written on it. The helicopter does a second pass of each tribe's signal.]
Brian: It was a close contest, but I think we have our winner.
[The helicopter drops the care package in front of the Simpsons Tribe camp. They break up the pyramid and go out to claim their reward.]
Simpsons Tribe, Day 9
(Lisa is setting up the umbrella from the care package they just won when she is joined by Milhouse.)
Milhouse: Need some help?
Lisa: Sure.
(Lisa and Milhouse finish setting up the umbrella right next to the shelter.)
Lisa: You did a great job helping out with the challenge yesterday.
(Lisa gives Milhouse a kiss on the cheek, which makes Milhouse turn beet red.)
Milhouse: Uhhh..ha ha…thanks Lisa.
Lisa: Want to go check the tree-mail for today's immunity challenge?
(Lisa and Milhouse hold hands as they go off to check the tree-mail. Back at the shelter, Bart watches them walk away with a slight look of disdain on his face.)
Day 9: Immunity Challenge
Brian: (reading the Wall Street Journal) Humph, Burger King's stock is up 6 points today
Camera Guy: Umm, Brian….
Brian: (puts away newspaper) Oh yeah, the immunity challenge. Here come our tribes now.
(Hogwarts Tribe and Simpsons Tribe arrive at a sandy 100-yard field with 10 yard zones at each end. The Simpsons Tribe is excited while the Hogwarts Tribe looks puzzled.)
Brian: Okay teams, today we're gonna play a sport that is famous in the Muggle world…Football, or American football as the British call it.
(Hogwarts Tribe groans upon hearing of the challenge.)
Malfoy: Are you serious dog? We don't even know the rules of the sport and you expect us to play it?
Oh, and another thing, how come this is my first line in this episode?
Brian: In order-yes, yes, and I don't know so go ask the author.
(After a brief rules explanation, the two tribes take the field waiting for Brian's signal.)
Brian: First team to 21 wins immunity! Survivors ready….GO!
[The Simpsons Tribe kicks off to the Hogwarts Tribe and the game is underway. The Simpsons Tribe takes a 7-0 lead quickly with an INT return for touchdown by Bart. However, the Hogwarts Tribe hangs in there and scores on their ensuing drive with a 20 yard touchdown run by Hermione to tie the game 7. The Simpsons Tribe counters with a TD run by Lisa, only to have the Hogwarts Tribe tie it up again with a TD pass from Harry to Neville. The two teams fail to score a few times each until the Hogwarts Tribe gets the ball inside the Simpsons Tribes' 15 yard line. Under pressure from Homer and Bart, Harry manages to heave a pass toward the end zone, which is….caught by Ron, sealing the win and immunity for the Hogwarts Tribe. The Hogwarts Tribe is ecstatic while the Simpsons Tribe stands dumbfounded, shocked at losing a football game to a bunch of wizards.]
Brian: Well, I can't believe I'm saying this, but Hogwarts Tribe, you just won the football game! Here is immunity, you are all safe from tribal council tonight. Simpsons Tribe, on the other hand, I'll see you all tonight.
(Both tribes head back to their campsites.)
Hogwarts Tribe, Day 9
(The celebration continues amongst the Hogwarts Tribe members. Amidst the joy, Harry taps Ron on the shoulder.)
Harry: Ron, can I talk to you for a minute?
Ron: Okay
(Harry and Ron head down the beach to talk, and Malfoy follows looking to once again eavesdrop.)
Harry: You did a good job on that last play.
Ron: Thanks Harry, but I wouldn't have caught it if it wasn't for your great throw.
(Harry nods in agreement and the two stand there awkwardly for a few moments.)
Both: I'm sorry!
Ron: Oh..you go first.
Harry: I'm sorry about trying to get between you and Hermione. I should have told you earlier about my feelings for her. If you want me to back off…,
Ron: You know, I always thought you and Hermione made a great couple.
Harry: Wait, you're not mad?
Ron: Well, initially I was, but then I had a conversation with Luna yesterday. I talked, she talked, and…(blushes) there may have been a little snogging involved.
Harry: You and Luna? That's great Ron! I had a talk with Neville myself, and he says he fancies Ginny.
Ron: Wow, you and Hermione? Me and Luna? Neville and Ginny? That's some crazy love triangle right there!
Harry: (chuckles) More like a love hexagon to me
(Both laugh at Harry's statement.)
Harry: (hand extended) Friends?
Ron: To the end, mate. (Ron and Harry shake hands, their friendship back together. Malfoy has a look of disappointment on his face. In the distance, Hermione looks upon the sight with a smile on her face. The Golden Trio was back together.)
Tribal Council
(The Simpsons Tribe enters the hut single file and takes their seats. Brian enters via a side door, putting out a cigarette as he takes his seat.)
Brian: Simpsons Tribe, welcome back to tribal council. Things were starting to look up for you all until today, when you got beat at your own sport by the Hogwarts Tribe. Seriously though, what the fuck happened guys?
Lisa: I think they just outsmarted us, had a better game plan, and just played with more effort and determination than we did.
Brian: Obviously. Flanders, the other tribe members have disapproved of your attempts to spread your religion. Do you think that puts you at risk of getting voted off?
Flanders: Personally, I think no one is safe from getting voted off, but my chances are probably a bit higher.
Brian: (looks at watch) Okay, I'm late for my appointment at the tanning booth, so let's go ahead and vote. Lisa, lead us off.
[Lisa heads to the voting booth, and writes down her vote for FLANDERS.]
Lisa: I know you mean well, but you're just a little too preachy. Someone has to go, so it might as well be you.
[Shot of Bart voting, then Moe voting, then Homer votes for MILHOUSE.]
Homer: Normally, I would vote for stupid Flanders, but that Milhouse kid is getting a little too close to my daughter.
[Shot of Nelson voting, Milhouse Voting, then Flanders votes and reveals his choice: HOMER.]
Flanders: I still don't know who voted for me last time, but I'm pretty sure it was Homer. Besides, he's not really contributing to the tribe anyway.
(Flanders puts vote in box and sits back down. Brian grabs vote box and comes back out.)
Brian: I will now read the votes.
(Brian opens box and grabs first vote.)
Brian: First vote is for…Flanders. Second vote…Milhouse…third vote…Homer…fourth vote, Flanders…fifth vote, Milhouse…sixth Vote, Milhouse….and the last vote is…Flanders.
(Simpsons Tribe looks perplexed.)
Brian: Well, in the event of a tie, I will pick one tribe member to cast another vote. Let's see here…Nelson, go vote again, and this time you can only vote for Milhouse or Ned.
(Nelson votes again quickly and gives the paper to Brian.)
Brian: Alright, Nelson's second vote is for…Milhouse!
(Milhouse, shocked, grabs his torch.)
Brian: Milhouse, the tribe has spoken.
(Brian puts out Milhouse's torch. Milhouse leaves, on the verge of tears.)
Brian: You all live to fight and survive another three days. Head on back to camp.
(The Simpsons grabs their torches and exits the hut.)
END OF EPISODE THREE
Tribal Council #3 Voting
Candidate (# of votes)
Milhouse (4)
Homer
Bart
Nelson
Nelson*
Ned (3)
Milhouse
Moe
Lisa
Homer (1)
Ned
*- tiebreaker vote