Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly or any of the characters on it, but I do own Jacob and Isabel.

"Hey, Freddie, right?" A short blonde girl asked the boy sitting next to her in her third grade class. She had just moved to the city with her mom after her parent's messy divorce, and even though she had moved from a small town she was warming up to the big city of Seattle, and was brave enough to talk to the boy next to her since she had just walked all the way to school by herself. When you've just accomplished one thing, you're eager to accomplish the next.

"Yeah," the short brunette answered as he worked on his worksheet. He seemed polite enough.

"Can I have your cookie?" she asked, pointing to the one next to him. They were from the cafeteria, and she had overheard him telling his friend Shane that he hated them, and had also heard her new friend Carly saying she loved them.

"Oh, yeah, sure."

"My name's Sam."

"Nice to meet you, Sam," Freddie gave a small smile. She hardly knew him then, and she didn't think he would be a part of her life. She just thought he was a nice kid who gave her what she wanted, and she thought she was being brave for talking to a stranger. But she would only get braver, and she would only get closer with him.

Carly ran out of the house as soon as Freddie and Isabel went to his room- I saw them turn into the hallway, and I was pretty sure that was the only place they would go. I wondered what they would do in there- but just thinking about it made me feel sick.

She ran and dropped to her knees, not caring that she was wearing tights and was probably ripping them up, and pulled me into a hug from where I had sat down on the grass. She held on tightly, blurring my vision as her hair whipped around my face in the wind, but I could still see Jacob coming out and crouching next to me, mumbling his sympathies. I could only imagine how awkward it was for him right then.

"Go ahead and cry, Sam. Nobody will blame you if you do. Sam, you need to get your emotions out- I'm so sorry. We were listening, because there's a vent right up there and-," I stopped listening, and just nodded. I didn't cry, though, and when I heard her tell me to again, I pulled away.

"Carls, I'm not gonna cry," I told her, and she looked at me weirdly. "Why would I cry? I can move on with my life now. Let's go pack. You want us to give you a ride back home Jake? What about Ms. Benson?"

I felt numb, and didn't really feel what I was feeling or understand what I saying. But I knew I got up and walked to Carly and my room, which was across from Freddie's closed door. Ms. Benson, knitting in the living room, gave me a sympathetic look. I half wondered if she was going to stay with Freddie and knit him ugly sweaters and give him tick baths, but I felt like if I spoke again I would puke.

Carly and Jacob followed me into the room, and I stared to fold my things up and set them into my bags. Carly didn't move, and I couldn't say anything, so I just flung one of her shirts at her and kicked her bag a bit.

The shirt whipped back at me, striking me in the face. "Sam, stop it! You're hiding! Stop! Stop packing up, stop doing this! Come on, let's just stay, let's see how things go!"

"Stop it! Carly, things aren't going anywhere. People aren't perfect, this isn't a fairytale. Let's just get back to Spence and Jake, you'll be with your boyfriend and you'll be happy, I'll move on, we'll all move on, life will go on." I shouted back at her, and I felt every single limb in my body quivering. I felt like I could feel every single hair on my body standing up in shame that I had screamed at her, and I watched helplessly as she burst into tears.

I couldn't comfort her. I wouldn't comfort her. I was too busy trying not to break down, trying to be okay.

And yet, I still felt free. Free, but empty. I had revealed the last thing I was holding onto. I felt like I was naked, walking around with no shelter at all. Even if I was free, I was scared and empty and bare.

"Sam," a voice said at my door, and I collapsed onto the floor, almost crying as well. I felt surrounded by hurt and anger and frustration. There was Carly, crying. There was Ms. Benson, confused. There was Jacob, hurt that I was still rejecting him. Here I was- angry that I had let this happen to myself, frustrated with where I was stuck, confused at Freddie's reactions, hurt by just about everything, and still pretending I was okay.

And that was when I realized it. That the new Sam wasn't as empty as I thought. I thought that the new Sam had nothing in her, that she was a hollow of the old Sam, but it wasn't true. I don't know why I knew it then, but I did. I was carrying everything around about the old Sam, clinging to the way I used to be, but I had moved on. I wasn't the way I used to be. Time changed me, and people changed me, and life changed me. I was pretending to be something I wasn't.

That was when I realized I was wrong about something else, too. There was a possibility of a healthy balance between the old Sam and the new Sam. There was a part of the old me I was willing to try to hold onto and there were parts of the new me I needed. I could still be dominant and powerful and brave, but I could also be vulnerable and cautious and scared. It was okay to have flaws. I didn't always have to be perfect. I could have the best of both worlds- the new Sam was constantly given comfort, and the old Sam was constantly given what she wanted because she was willing to get it. I could get both what I wanted and comfort. It was okay to be afraid.

That knowledge was the only thing that let me get up and go to the voice at the door. That was what forced me to go past crying Carly, who was being comforted by hurt Jacob, and towards Freddie, who was standing at my doorway staring at his mess of friends.

He held out his hand, but, as the new person I felt, the perfect mixture of myself, I didn't take it. As the old Sam, I wasn't willing to let myself get hurt that badly, but as the new Sam, I still stayed with him and followed him. It was perfect, only he didn't love me and he loved Isabel, which made me want to take his hand more than anything. I wanted to hold him, and force him to stay with me- but I couldn't. I knew that.

"Sam,"

"Where's Isabel? What happened to her? Me and her are supposed to hang out, or something," even though it was only a few minutes ago that I had talked to her, I couldn't exactly remember what she had said.

He led me outside, which seemed like an omen because a storm was coming in, from what it looked and felt like.

"Sam, I broke up with Isabel."

I felt every inch of my body freeze up besides my eyes, which widened to about five times their normal size.

A wonderful, wonderful omen of lightning shot through the air.

"You...you dumped her. Broke up with her, I mean."

"Yeah, sorry, but I don't think you'll be able to hang out with her," Freddie grinned at me, and I felt myself smiling too- genuinely- for the first time in a while. "She's got to be pretty mad at you. I told her that I couldn't keep pretending I didn't have feelings for you, and that that was what we were talking about."

He had feelings for me. He had feelings for me. He had feelings for me! I wanted to scream it out to the world. I wanted to tell Carly.

But I didn't have too. I saw her at the window, listening in, of course. I should've expected that. I would've done the same was it her out here.

"You mean..." I drifted off, staring up into Freddie's eyes, feeling not like the old Sam or the new Sam, but me. I felt incredibly like me at that moment, with the thunder catching up. I was like the lightning, I realized. Always ahead of myself, never letting my thunder catch up.

"Sam, I want to give this a shot. I want to give you and me a shot."

As the new me, I felt brave enough to reach up and kiss him.

"Hey iCarly fans, boy have we got a treat for you today!" Carly screamed out, and Freddie jumped into the screen.

"We're gonna slather Freddie with honey and feed him to the bears!" Sam cried out in a cheerful voice, and Freddie rolled his eyes and elbowed her. They locked eyes for a moment, smirking at each other before they continued.

"We're going to Japan!" they screamed, and with one push of a button balloons surrounded them, and Freddie and Sam smiled at each other again, not arguing with intentions of hurting each other, but bantering on about the balloons- just like friends do.

"What are we doing here?" Carly whispered as she walked into the old iCarly studio.

"I dunno Carly. We must be..." I drifted off, and then we both stared into the camera Freddie was directing at us and screamed, "Doing a special reunion of iCarly!"

"No, we're not coming back for good- we've got too much on our plates now," I said sadly, pressing the aww button on my remote, and thinking about how amazing it was to be pushing a button on my remote for our show.

"But we've come back for one more episode- a real good bye episode. Complete with my co-host and best friend in the entire world Sam, and her boyfriend and our second best friend, Freddie!"

Freddie jumped in front of the camera and I playfully elbowed him. "Hey, make room for the stars," I said, and Freddie rolled his eyes at me, and I felt like melting into him right now, even with millions of people watching- and I could see on the big screen behind us that we had set up specially to show our stats, they were.

"If I didn't like you so much, I'd hate you," he joked, but I just shrugged.

"Hey, I'm that kind of person. You either love me or hate me," I said, and I knew fully in my heart that I was that person now. I was that girl who got what she wanted because she tried to get it, and I was that girl who was willing to make herself just a little bit vulnerable, because you have to be vulnerable to take risks sometimes. I was that girl with the amazing best friend and the fantastic boyfriend, and the actually okay grades, who wanted to go to school and be a chef. I was me- finally.

"You can say that again," Carly joked, and then she turned to the camera and said, "Well, we need someone to monitor the camera so Freddie can be onscreen with us for the whole time today, so we've got our new friend, Jacob Benson- who happens to be Freddie's cousin and once kissed Sam for like two whole seconds- to do that!"

"The greatest two seconds ever," Jacob joked as he came onscreen, and I winced, but he shook his head. "Just kidding," he said, and added on, "Though I did care about Sam, I've got a new girlfriend here to help me with the technical jun-stuff," he said when Carly glared at him, "And here name is Isabel!"

And Isabel came on screen, and she looked at me in that innocent way. I was amazed at the way she was so okay with being around Freddie and me, and the way she and Jacob just clicked. She hugged me briefly, smiled at Freddie and high fived Carly before she and Jacob got behind the camera.

"HOLD ON, I'M COMING!" a voice from the elevator screamed, and me and Carly burst out into laughter- and I couldn't tell you how amazing it felt to be laughing that hard as I watched Spencer, the guy who was like a big brother to me, come running in, Ms. Benson behind him.

"I do not need to take a tick bath! Trust me, I'm tick free! I shaved my legs like you told me too, 'cause they hide in your leg hair and all- and now I'm okay!" he screamed, and we all laughed even harder- even Freddie, Jacob and Isabel.

"Spence, you shaved your legs?" I asked, and Spencer leaned into the camera. "It was terrible," he whispered.

Our official last ever iCarly episode went perfectly, and after it was finished I walked outside of the apartments, across the hall and into the apartment that was once again Freddie and his mom's, and when Freddie and I were there alone I wrapped my arms around him. I was not afraid to touch him now- he was more than just my boyfriend. He was my best friend again.

"Sam," he whispered, and I nodded into his chest to tell him to go on. "I'm really glad I came back," he said into my ear, and I lifted my head up as well.

"So am I, Freddie," I told him.

And that moment was perfect. It would've been the end to a fairy tale. Even though I knew more was coming- I knew there would be fights and trouble and fear and confusion and heart ache. But still, deep down, I knew that no matter where Freddie and I went, we would both take this memory with us, forever.

Author's Note: There it is, the end to the story that made me cry to write it out, since I've been imagining this in my mind over and over again. Right now, I really have to give props to ColorsoftheSky101, because when I wrote "I wanted either the old Sam, or the new Sam. There was no healthy balance between the two- there was only emptiness." I was planning the moment in this chapter when I would have her realize that she wrong, and there was a healthy balance- I had it written out on paper and everything- and then she reviewed saying, "You know what? I think you'll make Sam wrong there - that's my theory. I don't think she'll ever be exactly the way she was, nor will she remain afraid and less of herself. I think she will grow from this experience - be her past and more, you know?" And I was totally shocked that she figured me out so easily. :D Just saying, that review amazed me. Thanks for it. :D Thanks to everyone else who read this story too, and thanks to all the reviewers out there, and thanks to everyone who encouraged me to continue this story and to everyone who gave me advice on this story. I hope everyone enjoyed it!