A/N: Sorry it took a while to update it's just the comment on me being a copier kind of bugged me so this chapter might be sort of choppy i guess. I'm not deleting the comment though because I feel that if I do it would be like saying I really did copy and I didn't. Even though from reading the summary of the story ours sound similar, SIMILAR not the same. I never even knew about the story till they said something about it. SO anyways so theres no confusion the chapter titles means like after telling them the truth Tyler feels lighter like not so stressed by keeping it a secret.

Italics are thoughts, texts, emphasis (sp?) on words, and noises.

Disclaimer: I own a phone, a lamp, and an All Time Low CD but not Degrassi in anyway. Just this story idea.

Chapter 5: A Lighter Feeling

Tyler's POV

I waited, but nothing happened. No one ran, no one laughed or said anything, the sky didn't come falling down either like Eli thought. I was smiling on the inside. I felt so light without the 'secrete' holding me down; crippling me almost.

"So umm…" I started not sure how to finish. I guess I could start with how I felt about it all. "uh well you know how small towns talk? Soon everyone knew, and they were all judging me. Giving me their pity and I didn't like it. So I left and lived with my grandparents for a while but things weren't very good there either. I put up with it though, I thought…I thought I diserved it because they were dead and I was alive." my eyes started to water and I had to stop.

"You know that's not true…right?" I looked at Clare then Eli expecting them to be the voice behind the words but they both shook their heads 'no'. Clare pointed at Adam. I turned to him and this time he didn't look away from me when our eye's met. It gave me a chance to see how he was taking all of this. His eye's were filled with emotion, pity? No it wasn't that it was different. I can't describe it though, it was just like he cared.

"Umm yeah. Yeah I do now, but back then…half the things I thought…" I didn't finish.

I shifted uncomfortably I didn't know what they wanted to hear from me. We were all silent for a long time.

"When I was leaving my brother Liam gave me this hug, a really tight hug and he wouldn't let go for a long time. It was like he knew that we wouldn't see each other again. I wish I knew what was going to happen then before it did maybe then it could have been stopped and we'd all be okay." Maybe then I would of stayed so I wouldn't have had to suffer with all this pain, I could be with them right now. I added in my head. "He's probably dead now anyways."

Clare made a gasping noise. How could she be shocked I said that? It needed to be said. I needed to hear it.

"You don't know that for sure Ty." Eli was trying to make me feel better but I didn't want it sugar-coated for me. I wanted the truth and the truth was Liam is probably dead. There wasn't any need to deny it any longer, I'd done it long enough I needed to just face the facts.

"Come on, kidnapped people usually never survive after the first 48 hours. Its been two and a half fucking years Eli." that came out colder then I meant for it too but I didn't regret saying it.

"Tyler.."

"It's a proven fact. Go look it up." I stood up, I couldn't handle talking about it anymore. I looked at my watch it was 5:30 PM. I had plenty of time before I had to be home. Not knowing what to do I ran. Ran away from all of this, it was to much for me to handle now. I was getting to close to them, it would get bad if I stayed around them for much longer, for all of us. I was just like my cousin Eli, bad things happened to the people I loved when they were around me. I couldn't risk it. So I did the only thing I knew how to, run. Running, it's all I ever seemed to do anymore. Such a coward I thought, that's what I was, a coward.

If they didn't push me away first I'd find a reason to pull myself away.

I couldn't find one though; not a good one. So telling them my past would have to do. For now.

"Tyler! Wait!" I heard Adam howler from behind me. It sounded far off and distant. I just kept running like the coward I was.

Adam's POV

I yelled her name but she didn't turn back, I didn't know if it was because we finally knew about her past or if she was still mad at me.

I just stood their with a dumb look on my face.

"Just give her some time Adam." Eli put his hand on my shoulder pulling me back down to the grass. shouldn't I be the one running away from this, not her? Shouldn't Eli be telling her that about me? Everything was wrong. Like in a parallel universe. It wasn't right.

Rising again ignoring Eli's advice I ran after her. The stupidest thing I could of done.

I wasn't going to stop until I had caught up with her. She looked back and saw me chasing her so she just ran faster. Damn she could be in the Olympics. She was just that fast it was impossible to keep up but somehow I managed to.

I almost lost her when she turned behind a house. I followed her through alley after alley and peoples' backyards. She wouldn't give up on losing me. I wouldn't give up on catching her.

Tyler rounded a corner into an alley that I was familiar with because of all the times I ran away from bullies. I knew a short cut to the end and took it cutting her off. She stopped dead in her tracks and looked at me. Looking behind her deciding if she could make it to the end before me. Shaking her head she walked over to a brick wall, leaning against it she slid down until she was sitting on the gravel. Bringing her knees to her chest she wrapped her arms around them like she was cold. Tyler laid her head down on her arms.

Slowly I walked over to her. When she didn't move I sat down next to her. Neither of us said anything; just sitting there in each others company. "I'm broken. You can't fix me no matter how much you try Adam. Nothing's going to change for me. I try and tell myself that I'm not as sick as Eli is sometimes as sick as he can be; but I've been lying to myself all this time. I'm no better then he is."

"There's nothing wrong with you, your not sick and neither is Eli. You've just been through some rough times. That's all."

She looked up at me with tears pooling in her eyes. "How can you not think I'm damaged?"

"I don't know, I just don't." it was the truth.

"Your crazy Adam." She leaned her head on my shoulder. "I'm running from my past, even though you guys know it now. And you call that normal? That's not right." I didn't say anything just wrapped my arm around her.

After a long time had gone by in silence I whispered softly, "I'm sorry."

Tyler looked up at me confused. "What do you have to be sorry for?"

"For making you think I was using you, I would never do that. You mean to much to me."

"No that's my fault I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions, it was just when Eli called I panicked and I thought that was all you wanted to know. That you didn't care." It was the complete opposite, I did care. "It was easier. Easier then believing someone wanted to know about me."

"Are we really fighting over who's fault it was?" I couldn't help but laugh it was just so trivial.

"Huh yeah I guess so." she was smiling. Good.

"Oh and by the way Tyler I do care." she leaned her head back down against me. "And it was my fault." she just laughed shoving me playfully in the side.

Tyler's POV

I checked my watch. It was 6:45 PM now. Over an hour since I had ran.

We were walking, and laughing; just like everything was fine. It wasn't all perfectly fine but it was nice to pretend.

Sometimes.

"Well, well, well, look who caught the runaway." I could hear the smirk in Eli's words. Clare was smiling and Adam was laughing. It was like watching the happy ending of a Disney movie. I hadn't even noticed Adam had been leading me back to my house. I was too consumed by our conversation. Though ask me what we talked about; I couldn't answer you.

I glanced at the lovebirds. They were perched on the stairs in front of Eli's house. My cousin had his left arm wrapped around his girlfriends shoulders and right arm not about to let go. Clare was smiling like a fool; they both were. She was one step lower then Eli leaning her head against his chest. They were so happy. I wished I had that. Happiness, and someone to share it with.

"Well you know, it was nothing." Adam flexed his arms making us all laugh. He walked over to the railing and leaned against it. Him and Eli started to talk about some new comic. I sighed. Clare looked up at me and nodded her head to the side at her boyfriend's hearse. I smiled shaking my head yes. Eli lifted his arm from Clare while turning to face Adam better. He clapped his hands together as if he had just realized something.

Clare looked at me and shook her head laughing as she stood. "Boys. What are you going to do?" I laughed to as we got into the back of Morty.

I hadn't been back here in a long time. It was a lot more messy then I had remembered, I smiled as my eye's rested on a picture of the three of us; Eli Julia, and me. It had been taken just a few weeks before she died when I came to visit over my Spring Break back home. We had been close, when ever I came up here for the summer she and I would hangout. Julia and I had actually been friends before her and Eli started dating. We meet at a summer camp in Ontario. Even though she was two years older then me we got along great It was like we clicked instantly, when the camp was over we didn't want to leave and go back to our own homes and towns, we had become so close in two months. So we made plans to hangout again before summer was over. Since I was staying at CeCe and Bullfrog's house like I did every summer she got to meet them. With that came Eli too, and they immediately started talking over the phone and on Skype and soon after that he had asked her out. It was so cute from my side; my best friend and my favorite cousin were dating. I missed her so much. Tears started to come to my eyes so I quickly looked away and took in the rest of Eli's junk as I liked to call it.

He had a set of tools in a red and black case, a set of jumper cables, a sharpie, a blanket, all kinds of trash - empty pop bottles, gum wrappers and their packs, along with some empty chip bags. Closer up to the seats were a pile of things that looked more organized. Including his school books, a dictionary which I thought was odd even for Eli, his backpack, some CD cases a few comic books, and a journal.

"Wow that boy really need's to clean this place out." Clare nodded in agreement to my statement as she went to sit down on the blanket. Yelping she moved over and pulled the blanket back revealing an old blue and white Frisbee.

"Umm?" Clare laughed confused as she held it up.

Getting a closer look at it I exclaimed, "Hey that's mine!" then muttering, "I always knew he had taken it." Clare just laughed at my childish remark and sat it down near the back door.

"So Tyler, I just wanted to say I was really sorry for what happened to you and your family." I looked down at my hands I appreciated her words but I didn't really want to talk about it right now.

"Thank Clare." I wasn't really sure what to say to her. Things still felt awkward between us. "I finished our project in math."

She smiled this time it was her time to say thank you. After that neither of us knew what to say and just sat there in silence. "Look Tyler I was really stupid for over reacting and accusing you of things without knowing anything beside what Alli had gotten stuck in my head. I'm sorry." She held out her hand but I gave her a tight hug instead.

"It's okay I wasn't too nice about it all either." after that we both loosened up and things weren't awkward anymore. We were talking and laughing and getting to know each other like that first day in math class.

Eli opened up the back door to the hearse giving us both questionable looks. He was probably wondering what we were up to, and more importantly what we were saying about him. He could be so conceited at times.

Ignoring him we both got out and walked over towards the sidewalk.

"Oh I better call Alli and let her know what happened so she doesn't be mean to you again Monday morning."

"Haha yeah." I said dryly I wasn't really comfortable talking about her.

Clare pulled out her phone and looked at the time. "Oh! I better get going I have church tonight and tomorrow morning."

Before she turned around I leaned closer to her so the guys wouldn't hear me. Feeling nervous I asked "Um can I ask you something?"

"Sure what is it?" She smiled and I relaxed some, looking around to make sure Eli and Adam had gone inside I saw that they had.

"Well, um, well do you think that…would it be okay if I, would it be okay if I went to church with you Sunday?" the look on her face was priceless. My question had startled her. "You know Clare just because Eli's an atheist doesn't mean I am one too."

She shook her head stuttering. "No Tyler I mean tha-that's not w-what I, I didn't me-mean it like that." I waved my hand in the air it was no big deal it happened all the time.

"So can I?" dragging out my words, she still hadn't answered my question.

"Yeah sure. Is it okay though if you spend the night? We won't have time to pick you up before Sunday Church. I could have my mom come and get you after church tonight if that's okay." I nodded happily I hadn't been to church since right before I left my grandparents house in America. That was over three weeks ago now.

The main reason I kept going after what had happened was to pray that Liam would be okay. Even if my parents were gone, I thought if God was really out there maybe he would hear my prayers about my little brother and that he would send him home safely - if he was still alive - because I was in God's home when I asked him. It never hurt to try.

Waving to her as she walked back to her house I climbed the stairs to find Adam and Eli playing video games. I sat down in a chair next to them and watched the screen. Not even two minutes after I sat down Eli had won the fight game that they were playing. I couldn't stop myself from laughing.

"What's so funny?" Adam asked me, I was sure he already knew the answer it was pretty obvious.

"Oh, nothing." I smiled innocently.

Eli made a noise and looked at Adam, "She thinks you suck."

"What! Eli! Why'd you say that?"

"Because it's true you so do."

"Oh you asked for it now Elijah!" he cringed when he heard his full name making me laugh. Before he had time to say some smart-remark back like he always did I grabbed one of the little black decretive pillows that CeCe had scattered around the living room and tossed it; aiming right for his head. Hitting my target perfectly.

Eli stood up and took a few steps towards me. I wasn't sure what he was going to do back but I did know exactly what to say to stop him. "Oh I wouldn't do that if I were you Eli."

"And why is that Tyler?" he took another step forward testing me.

"Or I'll tell Clare all bout Clara Edwin." I grinned.

He froze. Trying to say something back, I could see him trying to think of something worse then that that he had on me. He couldn't think of anything just gave me a threatening glare and sat back down next to Adam. Actually he had a lot of dirt on me. When I say a lot I really mean a lot, lucky for me he couldn't think of anything. I was quite satisfied with his reaction giving him a smirk of my own.

"Who's Clara Edwin? You mean like Clare Edwards?" Adam piped up. He had been silent through the whole thing watching Eli and me carefully.

"Well actually Adam now that you mention it-" sadly I didn't get to finish. Eli had cut me off talking loudly in attempts to drowned me out if I said anything more.

"She's noth- it's nothing. Nothing. Don't you say a word." he caught himself before he gave up anymore information about the mystery girl. The last part was directed to me though, it was an order.

I sent Adam a text, "I'll tell u l8tr Kay?"

He looked at me nodding.

"Okay…so anyways you should see Tyler play a videogame she's really good." Adam smiled brightly at me.

"Who do you think she learned from." Eli locked his fingers together while stretching out his arms popping all of his fingers at once making chills go up my spine. I hated the sound of joints popping when they didn't need to be.

"Don't get to cocky Eli. I still have plenty of pillows over here to throw at your big head." I gestured to the many pillows laying around in my reach.

"I do not have a big head." Eli stated matter-of-factly.

"What ever helps you sleep at night dude."

"Wow Tyler wow. That was a stab at my heart." he over dramatically placed a hand on his chest - over where his heart would be. "To think this is how you repay me after I let you stay in my house, and eat my food for free? Even worse your family and you say that to sweet me." I couldn't help but laugh.

"Eli your not sweet by any means; and Adam eats here for free."

"But he's my friend, it's different."

That's when Adam started to get into it to, "Actually Eli I think you should now that this, what's going on between you and me," he pointed at Eli then himself, "well I'm really just in it for the food." I bit my lower lip trying to hold in my laughter.

Eli stood up pretending to be even more hurt now with a shocked look on his face he looked at us and said, "This betrayal from her I can understand, but that Adam is to much. I can't take being with you two right now. If anyone needs me I'll be upstairs in my room crying into my pillow." As he walked over to the stairs he turned to look back, placing his left foot on the bottom step. "I thought what we had was special Adam. I guess I was wrong." With that he faced forward again and climbed up the stairs to his room.

That's when we lost it - Adam and me that is - we couldn't hold in our laughs any longer. Bursting into laughter tears came to our eyes. I grabbed onto my stomach which was now starting to hurt but I couldn't stop. While Adam continued to laugh but it become silent. Trying to get his breath back he fell off the couch hitting the floor hard. Only making me laugh more.

"You think this is funny?" He said getting back on the sofa rubbing the back of his head and flinching.

"Hilarious actually."

"Your terrible." Finally I had gotten control over my laughing and was able to stop.

"I know you think I'm awesome." I said flipping my long hair back behind me head.

"Oh you wish." is what Adam had said but I could of swore I heard him say under his breath "No I think your perfect." But that was crazy why would he say that about me? I was probably hearing things I convinced myself, even though I did want that to be what he had said. I desperately wanted that.

Okay next chapter will have her sleeping over at Clare's and going to church, not sure what else yet any help would be awesome! I desided to have Tyler and Adam get together but I don't want to rush into it either so please be patient with me (:

Did you like, hate, or love this? Got any ideas for the story? then give me a review. I give you hours of my time, you can at least give me a few minutes of yours. :D