Disclaimer: Nothing you recognize from supernatural is mine. Evy and everything you dont...that is from me.

A/N: So here is another chapter. Its more of a filler but still a little bit fun. It doesn't seem like people like this one as much but I promise it gets more exciting. Just hang in there and everyone loves a reivew. Though I've pretty much given up on reviews. This story is already complete. So in the one I have for the third season and I'm in the process of writing the forth. So hand in and bear with me. Even without the reviews I'm still completely in love with the show and love writing about it. I've fallen for my character and her place in the Winchesters lives. And just wait...there is so much more fun to be had.

Enjoy!

And no matter what, thanks for reading. =]

Chapter Twelve: Pointless Worry

It's a little bit funny

This feeling inside

I'm not one of those who can easily hide

Though I don't have much money

But boy if I did

I'd buy a big house where we both could live

Sunlight made it shine prisms on the wall. I couldn't stop staring at it. Nor could I stop smiling. I was so ecstatic. It had been over a day since we'd left the room. I was alone now while Dean grabbed food but that was okay. I sent a mass text to everyone I knew, telling them that I was engaged. It was like a dream. I still couldn't believe it. Dean had asked me to marry him and I had agreed whole heartedly. It was so fantastic. My jaw hurt from smiling so much. I was staring at my ring when I sat up. I knew he was coming. I didn't know how, but I did. I was suddenly so frickin excited. I faced the door and a few moments later Dean came in with bags of food.

"What?" He grinned at me.

"Nothin." I replied with a very girly voice.

"Miss me?" He grinned.

"Yes, you can never leave again." I told him and ran to him, jumping into his arms.

He dropped the bags and caught me. I wrapped my legs around his waist as he hands formed around my ass. I ran my fingers through his hair and kissed him deeply.

"I'm not hungry anymore." I whispered and kissed his earlobe.

He laughed before throwing me onto the bed. I grinned at him, gripping his arms as he crawled on top of me. I looked up at him, feeling subdued now. All he had to do was look at me and I would do anything he wanted. He kissed me passionately, our eyes never leaving each other. I arched my body against him. He smiled and trailed his lips down my jaw and to my neck. My breath caught in my throat. He lowered himself on top of me, his fingers knotting in my hair. My fingers dug into his back as I cemented my body to his. His shirt hung loosely on me. His hand moved underneath the shirt. I quivered and my excitement grew as I felt his hot breath on my skin, his fingers moving gently across my body. We were just getting to the good part when there was a knock on the door. I groaned and gripped tighter to him when he moved to answer it.

"Don't go." I told him.

He sighed and kissed me deeply before getting off the bed. He opened the door and then someone I would have thought I'd never see again walked into the room.

"Seriously?" I asked looking at her.

"Evy." She grinned.

"Kate." I said as I slid off of the bed.

"Nice shirt." She smirked with raised brows.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair, but a second later she was in front of me taking my hand.

"What is this?" She grinned holding my left hand.

I blushed and shrugged. "Dean proposed." I told her unable to keep the grin off of my face.

"I should end you right now." Dean told her.

"What happened wasn't my fault." She told him. "He's dead, by the way." She smiled at me.

"You like me enough to kill one of your groupies? Should I feel honored?" I asked her.

"He was a pain in the ass and questioned my authority on a daily basis. He had it coming. When he shot you I figured it gave me enough of an excuse to cut him loose." She told me.

"Hmph." I said and eyed her. "And you come to me now? That was weeks ago. I'm all healed from that."

"Not from something new though, huh?" She said looking at me.

"I'm always having a little bit of fun." I smiled.

"I was in town and heard you were here."

"Kill anyone lately?" Dean asked her.

"You're cute." Kate smiled, patting his cheek.

He leaned away from her. I smiled and went to him. I put my arm around him. "It's okay." I smiled at him. "She's not so bad."

"And from what I've heard you and Sam have met a few friendly vampires along the way." She said circling him.

"What?" I frowned.

"We'll talk about it later." Dean told me.

"Why not now?" Kate grinned as she sat on the edge of the bed.

"Dean?" I asked.

"It was a job while you were gone." He told me. "It was a thing with Gordon. It turned out in the Vampires favor. She was decent."

I nodded, "Okay."

"Okay? That's it?" Kate grinned.

"If Luther had kept something from you and then gave you a vague explanation like that, are you telling me that you wouldn't just say 'Okay'?" I asked her.

She just looked at me, a sad expression crossing her face. "No, you're right. I would let it go."

I sighed and sat on the bed next to her. "I'm still very sorry about Luther." I told her. "I'm sure it's a lot harder on you then it would be for us."

"How?" Dean shot at me. "You can't say that when you don't know." He got that look on his face.

"Are we going to live forever?" I asked him. "If you were gone, as horrible as it would be, I would be forced to go on. I would get old and die. Kate's not going to die. Not ever. How could it get any worse than that?" I asked him. He didn't say anything. He just looked at me with a distant look I knew well. "Baby…" I said and stood, going to him. I put my hand on the back of his head, running the back of my index finger down his cheek. I smiled at him and kissed him sweetly.

"Okay, well, that's enough for me." Kate said getting up. "I'll leave the happy couple alone. Just wanted to pass on the news about the bad vamp." She grinned. "Call it an engagement present." She said and let herself out.

"I hope we don't see her any time soon." Dean told me.

"Me too." I said and kissed him deeply.

We were supposed to be working. We were gathering useful information about a vengeful spirit. Well, they were, it was me who was doing anything but something helpful. I caught myself staring through the window of a bridal shop. A gorgeous gown on display. The urge was too strong and I went into the shop. I was immediately greeted and the ring on my finger gave me away before I could say a word. I was ushered off and it was too easy to convince me to try on just one dress. Only one turned into two to three and so on. It was horrible and yet wonderful all at the same time. I stood among the circle of windows and looked at my reflection. The dress was strapless, with beading down the front and back. There were hardly any words for it. The train was perfect in length. They put a vail on that hung down the length of my back. A simple tiara held my hair back nicely while some hung over my shoulders. I sighed and turned around stepping down from the pedestal.

"Everything all right?" One of the women who were helping me asked.

"Yeah, this is all wonderful and all but…" I said pulling out the sides of the dress. "It's just all a little too soon. It's barely been a week since he proposed."

"Have you picked a date yet?" She grinned. They were all very enthusiastic.

"No, not yet."

"Are you thinking big or small?" She asked. "This dress would look fantastic with either." She stated.

I smiled at her. She wasn't getting the hint. "I think I'm just going to change. It's just not time yet." I told her and went into the dressing room.

I changed and thanked them before leaving. I twirled the ring on my finger. I walked down the street and it seemed like anything and everything associated with weddings was in every window. I passed several flower shops, a stationary shop, another bridal shop, and that was only a few of them. It was more depressing then I had thought it would be. While I was looking at myself in that beautiful dress something occurred to me. Something I had pushed aside not wanting to think about it. But it was there, like a stain you can't scrub out. I finally had enough. I found the nearest ice cream parlor and bought the biggest bowl I could of chocolate chip cookie dough. I found a bench and sat down, devouring the ice cream. I probably looked like some kind of pig but I didn't care. I was starting to feel ill but I kept eating it. Soon someone sat in front of me. I glanced up and Sam was smiling at me.

"Hey." I said sadly.

"You okay?" He frowned.

"It doesn't matter." I told him.

"Of course it does." He told me. "What is it?"

"What's the point?" I said looking up at him.

"How much of that have you eaten?" He countered.

"Not enough to fill the bottomless pit that I'm in." I told him, staring into the bowl.

"You've had enough." He said taking the bowl from me.

"Hey." I said reaching for it but he pulled it out of my reach. "Come on, I'm having my own personal pity party."

"About what?" He said taking a big bite.

"That's mine." I said giving him my best pouty face.

"That doesn't work on me." He grinned. "It may make Dean do whatever the heck you want but…not me." He said and took another big bite.

"You're mean." I frowned at him.

"Spill and I'll give it back." He goaded.

"It's just…" I said and shrugged.

"Just what?" He asked.

"This whole wedding thing." I replied.

"What about it? You've been so excited." He stated.

"I know. But I was in a bridal shop earlier and was trying on dresses –"

"You were trying on dresses?" He said cutting me off, a big grin on his face.

"Yup." I said nodding. "And then it occurred to me that the whole thing is pointless. There is nothing normal about our relationship. We're frickin demon hunters! I'm never going to get the white dress wedding with all our family and friends there. We won't get to argue about flowers and stationary and which picture to use for our 'Save the Dates'. We won't be able to do any of those things. So why bother?" I said and reached for my ice cream.

Sam gave it up like he said he would. I took another big bite and felt like I needed more. I was even considering it when my stomach lurched and it almost came back up. I pushed the bowl back over to Sam who just grinned and started to eat it.

"No words of wisdom?" I asked him.

"You can have all of those things if you really want them." He told me.

"How?" I asked.

"I don't know." He told me. "But if you really want it he'll make it happen. I'll help."

"Thanks." I smiled at him.

"Do you want all of that?" He asked.

I looked at him and thought. "No, not really." I replied. "It would be nice, but in the end all I want is Dean. It's just that I've been to plenty of weddings, and heard about them, and wish that I could have that. But it doesn't matter. Not really."

"Thought so." Sam grinned and winked.

"Thanks, Sammy." I smiled at him. "I just worry that as good as all this feels it's going to fall apart."

"Why do you think that?" Sam frowned.

"There is something that's always after us. We will never be able to be a normal couple. We won't have the white picket fence or the kids or the fat grand babies. It's a dream and I don't want to be diluted with how happy this makes me." I explained.

"You don't need all of that to be happy. Dean is madly in love with you. I almost gave him away when I made that brother-in-law comment." He told me.

"So you were hinting at something?" I grinned at him. "How long was he planning this?" I asked him.

"Since you came back." He replied. "When you were gone he said that he would have married you. So, now that you're back he's going to." He just smiled and winked at me.

"I just don't want to screw this up." I told him, serious again.

"You won't." He said and took my hand in his. "I'd be more worried about him screwing it up." He grinned.

I laughed and put my other hand over his. "Again, thank you."

"You're welcome." He smiled and leaned over the table, kissing my hair. "You two have nothing to worry about."

"We don't?" I asked with a small smile.

"Of course not." He smiled back. "He'd go to the end of the world for you."

"Yeah, but that's what I'm worried about. I would do the same thing. That's the point. We would do anything for each other, and for you." I told him. "But the lengths we'd go to…the danger we'd put others in just to keep each other safe. Is it worth the risk? Others getting hurt because we're protecting each other?" I asked him.

"Is it?" He said turning it on me.

"I think so." I told him. "Does that make me a horrible person?" I asked him sadly.

He laughed and shook his head. "Not at all."

I grinned at him. "For the fourth time, Sammy. Thank you."

"This been weighing on you long?" He asked.

"Long enough." I replied. "I think we should find your brother now."

He smiled and stood, holding out his hand to me. I took it and he pulled me to my feet. I wrapped my arm around his waist and hugged him tight.

The night had been a success. The spirit was gone and we were in for a good night's sleep. Except for me. I sat at the table, watching them sleep. For whatever reason I couldn't sleep tonight. There was something keeping me awake. Feeling the need to watch over them. I sighed and walked to the window. There was nothing out there. We had done what we needed and the job was complete. Everyone was safe but it felt like something was being held over us. There was always something. If it wasn't some random demon then it was Azazel. I almost thought he was going to show up. It wouldn't be beneath him. I pushed the thought out of my head and ran my fingers through my hair before going back to the bed. I crawled in and laid on my side facing Dean. He was on his back. I put my hand on his face and gently turned it toward me. I ran my fingers down his face before leaving it on his cheek. I stared at him, listening to him breath as he slept. I moved closer to him, putting my forehead against his. I smiled and kissed his lips gently. I whispered to him that I loved him and put my arm around him, closing my eyes. If there was anything I was sure of, I knew that Sam had been right. I was worrying for nothing. I didn't care if I had a big wedding or not. This ring on my finger was a symbol. It proved that we were past our problems. I was in this forever and so was he. I would be happy if we did the whole city hall thing. It being official was all that I cared about. Just being near him was calming. Things would be okay. As long as we were all together.

I know it's not much

But it's the best I can do

My gift is my song and this one's for you

And you can tell everybody

That this is your song

It may be quite simple but, now that it's done

I hope you don't mind,

I hope you don't mind,

That I put down in words

How wonderful life is

While you're in the world