Coming Home

The pups were on the lookout for Inuyasha's return and as soon as they could run to him, all five did so and launched themselves knocking him off his feet and on to the grass where they all rough tumbled for a while in jubilant greeting. He could hardly make out what they were saying as all were speaking and demanding his attention at the same time. Soon though Inuyasha got up and enfolded them all in his arms, taking in their healthy scents and noting that they were all happy and not depressed.

Then he sat down and let them speak; taking the time to allow each one tell him something and feeling overwhelming love for them, it may have been only just over a week that he had been away but it felt much longer to him and he realised that he never wanted to be without them again. Only after they had got greeting their father out of their system, did the pups turn to Sesshoumaru and welcome him home again.

Sesshoumaru had stood waiting calmly while the family reunited; remembering when he too had welcomed his father back home and had jumped into sturdy, strong arms which could keep him safe and get rid of any childish fears. He also remembered the few times when Inuyasha had done the same; the little hanyou had several times run to him when Sesshoumaru was his brother and had visited the village that he lived in, but that was before Inuyasha learned that he was unwelcome and was spurned instead of swept up into a loving embrace.

No matter how much Sesshoumaru now wished for the past to be different, Inuyasha had been deprived of knowing the sheer joy and feeling that everything was alright because father had come home, something that Sesshoumaru and his grandchildren knew and had known. There were so many repercussions that were caused by the youkai's rejection of his hanyou offspring; none of which Sesshoumaru had foreseen or maybe he would have acted differently, surely though that was the benefit of hindsight.

But then Inuyasha turned to him after he had dusted himself down from the spontaneous romp with his pups to watch Sesshoumaru, as he in turn was surrounded by the children. There was a wistful look in the boy's eye which pained the Daiyoukai and he opened his arms to invite Inuyasha to come to him. The hanyou responded and Sesshoumaru wrapped his arms round his son while the grandpups squirmed around both of them.

Inuyasha wondered for a second how on earth he came to be standing with Sesshoumaru's arms around him as if it were the most natural thing in the world. There had been no conscious decision to do so; he had merely looked up to see his father surrounded by pups and for a few moments he had felt left out, and then Sesshoumaru turned to him and held out his arms and Inuyasha walked over and was enclosed to his father's chest firmly but comfortably.

He took a couple of minutes to relax, listening to his father's heartbeat and steady breathing; feeling the strong swirl of youki, promising safety and belonging, wrapping him like a blanket and knew that nothing could come near to him unless Sesshoumaru willed it to do so. Was this what it was like to have a father; all this feeling of being protected in this certain knowledge of the Daiyoukai's power?

Is this what Sesshoumaru had felt with his father? No wonder the youkai had felt so very lost and bereft when the general died; if Inuyasha felt this way from one embrace, what must it be like to know such security and love for many years? Did Inuyasha's pups feel so safe when he held them? They must do, rushing to him as soon as he came home was their priority and always had been and Kagome said none of his friends felt so safe as when he was around, even going back to before the pups.

Although he remembered feeling loved in his mother's arms or when she tucked him to sleep with a blanket snugly, he didn't feel this safe. Quite often it was he who had felt the inherent desire to protect her, as he had done with his pack and Kagome before his little family came and after. But he had never had it directed at him before; not in such strength anyway, making him feel worthy of someone's while to keep safe and to know that it was Sesshoumaru, his father finally, was suddenly too much for him.

Sesshoumaru sensed Inuyasha's emotion and sent the pups on ahead to wash up before dinner, allowing him to give attention to his son. Still holding Inuyasha, he set up a low growl and petted him again until Inuyasha was able to answer, then Sesshoumaru asked what the matter was. Inuyasha responded to the gentle questioning and explained his impressions.

Sesshoumaru tightened his hold on his pup, it was the first time he had properly realised about Inuyasha never having been protected by a youkai. There had been no one to train the boy's youkai to help him grow whole; no youkai to protect him, in fact no protection since he'd been a tiny whelp. This was a serious omission for any with youkai blood and made it a marvel that Inuyasha had survived; in fact he may not have done so had he not been sealed to the tree.

Tessaiga notwithstanding, Inuyasha's youkai was still very strong and should have been trained to know its place in the pack to keep within its limits; in this case only Inuyasha's human blood had tempered it and the realisation almost made Sesshoumaru shudder. His son was a finely tuned and balanced hanyou; further testimony to the strength of his mother and the almost instinctive joining of two young creatures that could have made a good match given the right circumstances.

All Sesshoumaru could do now however was to assure his son in quiet words that he would always protect him now; even though he had pups of his own it didn't matter, he was still Sesshoumaru's pup. And Inuyasha believed him; in his own heart he knew that this was something he had always wanted, since he had met his strong 'brother' and throughout all the harsh treatment and bitter fights, he had wanted Sesshoumaru's love and regard.

His own flesh and blood had known things should have been different and always his youkai had cried out for Sesshoumaru to acknowledge him as more than brother, now he had done so Inuyasha's youkai was peaceful and calm in his body.

"Everything will work out my Pup." Said Sesshoumaru, once again risking Inuyasha's refusal; not a high risk considering he knew the boy very well, but risk nonetheless.

"Pup, huh; I'll have you know I am a father and a good one."

"I have seen this for myself Inuyasha, but it does not change the facts that you yourself are still a pup; you are still very youthful to have your own, especially one who is nearly sixty."

"Kagome could not have waited any longer."

"This I understand and you have both done a fine job; the pups are excellent, polite and surprisingly well behaved." There was a hint of teasing humour in the voice and Inuyasha heard it for what it was, without taking exception to being derided. He chuckled back;

"That is Kagome's doing mainly; as she got older she treated me more like one of the pups in any case, I was just as chastised as they if she thought I misbehaved or 'ran my mouth' as she said."

"I too noticed this; unfortunately it was bound to happen, the discrepancy of human and youkai maturation, yet you were both happy in your bond."

"Yes, I loved Kagome and I still miss her greatly."

"Naturally, it is only a matter of weeks since she died." There was no reply to this and Sesshoumaru was grateful; he had seen that Kagome was far more than mate to his son, for a long time she had been sister, then mate and eventually mother as well, as she aged and he did not. Inuyasha however would not be pleased to think along those lines, but to Sesshoumaru observing often, it had been obvious. Kagome was still of course his mate; but often when Inuyasha was playing with his pups, it was easy to see where the line blurred.

It seemed strange in a way to smile fondly at memories of Inuyasha now; especially as some of them were not really happy, of days when the whelp had been persecuted and not just by him. But Inuyasha was such a free being, wild even and no amount of human blood or magic rosary could fully tame the forest child spirit who had lived in and around the trees calling them home and who would be a pup for many centuries yet according to their kind.

In the end Kagome had recognised for herself that her beloved hanyou would never age mentally with her; she had known of course that he would physically stay youthful while her body aged, but she had never considered that he would stay essentially the same aged boy she had loved. He was not silly or childish as such, but there were times that she felt more a mother figure than wife to him. However it had not been a severe problem and he was a loving mate and a terrific father; giving his pups all he could, that had been denied him.

Sesshoumaru could sense that Inuyasha was once again calm and giving him a final squeeze, he kissed the top of his head in a completely natural gesture of fondness that had the hanyou once again caught off guard. But the moment of surprise vanished into a feeling of well being and the two walked into the Palace where they were greeted by Sesshoumaru's mother.

Inuyasha was a bit sheepish when he saw her, after all he hadn't been very polite even if he was truthful; but the Lady smiled graciously and put an arm around both boys as she led them into the dining hall.

"I have spent some time getting to know my great grandpups and I find them an absolute delight. Your father Sesshoumaru would have found them quite irresistible."

"As do I Mother... do I not pups, you enjoy spending time with me?" A chorus of various forms of 'yes Grandpapa' was heard and once again Sesshoumaru took a surreptitious glance at his son to see if the term had upset him. It did not seem to have bothered him as could have been expected, if he'd thought everything was happening too fast.

Dinner was a noisy affair as the pups were excited about their father being back and their newly discovered great Grandmother. They had been curious over the markings of both full youkai and had spent time in asking lots of questions about their family history and viewing the long gallery of portraits. Lots of squeals followed that excursion, as the pups found similarities and traits in the pictures to themselves or people they knew and the Lady was a natural story teller, able to bring to life tales of people she knew, and of balls and intrigues.

After dessert, the Lady offered to take the pups and eventually to put them to bed. The children were quite happy with the arrangement for they enjoyed the songs and stories that she knew; but they made Inuyasha promise to come to say goodnight. Not that there would have been any question of that, he already felt guilty for having been away from them so soon after their mother died. It had been necessary, but that did not stop him feeling bad; they had clung quite tightly to him when they said goodnight.

Once they were alone once again Sesshoumaru spoke;

"You are not concerned about Mother taking charge of your pups; you do not think she would harm them?"

"No."

"That is a great deal of trust in someone you only vaguely know by reputation."

"There is no danger; you love my pups and if you'd thought they would come to harm you would have stopped it." Inuyasha's voice was strong with this affirmation of his trust in his father and Sesshoumaru was humbled." Besides they can defend themselves until I reach them; Kagome didn't like me training their youkai, but it had to be done and I was firmer with her over that than I had been over Shippou."

"What method of defence do they have, they are young for their powers to have developed and I don't recall seeing their attacks?"

"I taught them what I learned; my only defence for years was claw and fang, it is the same for the pups but if they are threatened they are to attack all together and go for eyes, throat and genitals. However they are not to practice this alone nor use it in play; it is far too dangerous. I don't let them fight among themselves for that reason and they stop one another if it looks like an argument is going too far."

Sesshoumaru sighed as once again he was reminded of Inuyasha's lonely and frightening past; he truly regretted his early life choices but could do nothing really concrete about solving it anymore. It seemed that Inuyasha had grown and passed him by; he'd had to learn or die long before Sesshoumaru had changed his attitude towards his son. Inuyasha looked at his father questioningly and Sesshoumaru smiled ruefully.

"It seems that you no longer require a father at all my Pup; it is almost an insult to ask you to accept me as such now is it not? You have been a mate, you are a father yourself and everything is under your control. You have no need of me at all." His voice was soft but to Inuyasha he could hear the petulant self pity that must have been there since the youkai's childhood; but it was not something that the hanyou felt he could taunt his father about.

Inuyasha had never been malicious and although he could get incredibly angry he couldn't hold a grudge and he recognised Sesshoumaru's need to be needed; they were Inus, loyal and protective by nature with a built in desire to create a family pack. Sesshoumaru may not have recognised this need before but he had now and as Alpha it was his duty to form the cohesive pack; his instincts to shelter and protect his son and family required Inuyasha to not only know his place, but to act in harmony with it.

But then Inuyasha heard the real underlying problem; Sesshoumaru thought that his son didn't need him and Inuyasha knew how devastating that feeling was. He remembered that for many years Sesshoumaru too had been alone, except for Jaken and then Rin. Even though it had not been a neglected and hunted time for the youkai as it had been for his son, the Western Lord was acting against his type when he'd pursued his solitary travels. But Inuyasha was not going to stand for such a ridiculous statement;

"I have always needed you, always wanted you even when you hated me; you know this so why do you refuse to see it now? I know I would not be here if it wasn't for you and not just because of my birth, but you protected me in your own way as I grew, even if it was from a distance. Do you think I don't know that you could have killed me whenever you wanted; you always said I was to die, but you never did finish me off. Had you wished you could have done it no matter what your father said before or after I was born."

Sesshoumaru was speechless; he had not expected a tirade and Inuyasha wasn't finished;

"You had a normal relationship with your father; what would have happened if you'd mated normally and had a whole brood of pure youkai pups instead of an unwanted hanyou runt; would you expect your father to be bleating that you were no longer his son? You're being ridiculous; he would always be your Papa even when he became a friend, you would have always gone to him for advice and you would always have needed him."

As he'd ranted on, Inuyasha became more emotional; everything seemed to crash down on him. Whatever anyone said, Inuyasha knew that his Grandfather had many fights and disagreements with other youkai for allowing him to live and had received much scorn when he had adopted the hanyou. Sesshoumaru probably didn't know that himself, but Inuyasha had suffered a lot of derisive comments about his grandfather and his destructive love of humans and hanyou; things they would never have said to the full youkai, they'd had no trouble in saying to the half-breed.

One thing that Sesshoumaru had always been able to do was know exactly how Inuyasha was thinking at any given time; mainly because he had trained him in his feelings of inadequacy, coupled with the hanyou's general low esteem. It was now time to try to reverse this; he had not thought to while Inuyasha was happy and mated, there had been no need, but now the pup didn't have Kagome to support him and it would be too easy for the old insecurities to surface again.

Again the answer came perfectly naturally to him and he suited the action to the deed, he pulled Inuyasha out of his chair and once more held the boy to him closely whilst reaching down to tap him smartly on his bottom. Inuyasha yelped in surprise rather than hurt, while his father smirked at him, but spoke seriously;

"Remember your own solution to how a father should deal with a pup whose reasoning is flawed Inuyasha? Remember how you yourself said my father's death was the fault of neither of us? And before you tell me that you said nothing, I know what you were thinking. The time is long past for all of those harmful thoughts; do I make myself clear?"

"Perfectly clear thank you." Inuyasha was huffy but he was still being held and it was such a safe and comfortable feeling; something he knew he wanted to get used to, it was acceptance not only by Sesshoumaru but also Sesshoumaru as his father. He huffed again and was amazed to hear Sesshoumaru grumble back in amusement, before he carried on speaking;

"But of course you are correct in your assumption that I would have always needed my father; I had just not considered it in such a way before." Sesshoumaru realised of course that Inuyasha was right and wasn't he proving it there and then? It didn't matter how many pups the boy had, or how good a father he was, Inuyasha still needed reassurance and acceptance and to listen to the wisdom the older youkai had to offer in order for him to grow too and know he was loved.

"Come Inuyasha, it is time for you to say goodnight to your pups and then I think to retire yourself for the night." Before Inuyasha could loudly protest at such a notion, he was caught out in a face splitting yawn which made Sesshoumaru's smug look even smugger, until his mother came in through the door. She smiled at them as she passed to go and sit in a chair;

"It has been a long day for you Inuyasha Pup, and you too Sesshoumaru; an early bedtime would be very wise for you both and I can catch up with you my son, in the morning. Your little ones await you Inuyasha; Goodnight my boys." She had her own smirk on her face as she pictured the indignant look from both of them; but they obeyed her without a word.

TBC