A/N: Woohoo here's another chapter! It's extremely random…well, aren't they all? This one just seems more so than the others. And the chapter title sucks! YES!

Chapter 15: Chasing Edmund

Edmund hiked determinedly through the snow, all of his concentration focused on getting to the White Bitch's house. He was so focused that he hadn't noticed he had forgotten his pregnant woman's coat, not even when he showed signs of getting frostbite. All he could think about was how Jumper was his bestest friend ever. EVER!! But he got eaten by a mad rabbit and Edmund never saw him again. How a mad rabbit managed to swallow an entire camel still astounded him, but the fact remained. He still missed Jumper. Well, he was Edmund's BESTEST FRIEND EVER!!! That's probably why he missed him…and stuff.

Yeah, we have no idea where that came from either. Just don't ask. Again.

Abruptly, the scene changed to the other three siblings chasing after their brother followed by a panting Mr. Beaver.

"Hurry!" called Peter over his shoulder as he ran. He stopped suddenly and the others instantly crashed into him. They all fell in a mess of tangled limbs, screaming at the top of their lungs. Once they got up, they looked at what made Peter stop so suddenly, hence the suddenness of his sudden stop.

They had arrived at the summit of a hill overlooking the Bitch's castle. GASP! DUN DUN DUN!!! GAHHH!! DON'T HYPERVENTILATE!! Much…

The castle was made of…whatever castles were made of. No joke! Yes, be amazed that we didn't change it. Or did we…? Muahahahahah!!!

Susan stared at it and realized she hadn't applied any lip gloss in the last three minutes. The very thought terrified her every waking moment. Her breathing grew ragged as her figure withered until she quite resembled The Scream. She melted into a globule on the ground as her siblings just frowned down at her.

"I told you we could melt," Peter remarked smugly.

"But Peter, it's not even raining," Bielefeld pointed out.

"When did you change your name, Lucy?"

"I'm not Lucy."

"Uh…where's my sister?" Peter asked. Bielefeld shrugged. Peter chucked a hamster at him. "Go, get away! Scat, you!" Bielefeld's mouth opened in horror as he ducked the terrible ninja hamsters and fled into the forest.

"Phew, that was close," came a voice from behind Peter. He whipped around and noticed Lucy brushing some shavings off her coat.

"Where the heck were you?"

"Munching on a tree," she explained.

"That's my job!" Mr. Beaver cried indignantly. It was then that the camera people realized they were having some technical difficulties. They remembered suddenly to remove the lens from their cameras and poof, everything returned to normal. Mostly.

Meanwhile, the Pevensie siblings spotted their brother opening a gigantic door to the Bitch's palace. A terrible scream echoed across the barren valley as Edmund seemed to be blasted by a huge gust of air. The castle itself seemed to deflate, its towers sagging inwardly as the light spilling out of the open door abruptly extinguished. Once the door was closed, the castle stopped shrinking. And even as they watched, someone from the inside pumped the inflatable structure with air again, making it look like an actual castle.

"Well that was weird," Susan commented. The others silently agreed.

"Edmund," Lucy whispered forlornly, knowing her brother was now beyond their saving.

Mr. Beaver turned to her. "QUIET!" he screamed as loudly as he could. "THEY'LL HEAR YA!" Peter spun around and began to fart in Edmund's general direction. "NO!" shouted Mr. Beaver, leaping at Peter and tackling him to the ground.

Peter sprayed Mr. Beaver in the face with mace. Hehe, it rhymes. "Get off me!" Peter yelled, kicking the beaver off him.

"You're playing into her feelers!"

"You mean, like antennae?"

"Yeah, whatever!"

"But she doesn't have antennae…"

"SHE COULD!" Mr. Beaver insisted, his eye twitching. Could be from his numerous beatings or something.

"Alright, alright already!" Susan consented, holding up her hands in defense. "But we can't just let him go!"

"He's the bait!" Mr. Beaver explained. "The Bitch wants all four of ya!"

"Why?" questioned Peter, confused.

"To stop the prophecy from coming true. To make you explode in a field of molten flowers!"

Susan glared at Peter after hearing the dire news. "This is all your fault!"

"My fault?"

"None of this would've happened if you had just listened to me in the first place!"

"Oh, so you knew this would happen?"

"Of course I knew this would happen!" Susan retorted. "I read the bloody script! Which is why we should've gone back in the closet while we still could!"

"Stop it!" Lucy interrupted unexpectedly. "First of all, it's called a wardrobe, idiot, the movie's not called The Lion, the Witch and the Closet, now, is it? And second, this isn't going to help Edmund."

Mr. Beaver nodded in satisfaction. "She's right. Only Aslan can save your brother now."

"We're screwed," Lucy muttered under her breath.

Susan looked down. "What, is he like God or something?" Mr. Beaver slapped himself.

Peter sighed. "Sigh," he said. "Then take us to him." The camera pulled away for a wide shot of the three children and the beaver before the cameraman tripped over a rock and fell on his buttocks.

A/N: So, Bielefeld was a really sudden addition. I, Raven, wrote it and thought it was funny. That's actually the last name of iheartmwpp's favorite character on Kyou Kara Maou, Wolfram von Bielefeld of course! We definitely recommend it for your Anime fixes! As for me, well I'm into Naruto right now. I LOVE BUSHY BROWS!! Now, if you haven't seen the show, then whatever. Blarg. But if you have, YES! I love Rock Lee so much!!! And Sasuke, we both agree, is very sexy. As well as his brother, although he's evil and is a meanie-face. Hey, evil people can be hot too, can't they? Take Sephiroth for example…he is SO KICKASS!! Anyways, seeing as most sane people have no idea what I'm prattling on about, I'll stop now. Until the next update…which will be sometime when we can get together again.