A/N: What's a good parody without some Mary-Sue bashing?
Disclaimer: Everything you see below either belongs to C.S. Lewis, Eric Idle, and whoever was enough of a genius to come up with the first Mary-Sue.
Chapter : The Song That Goes Like This
As Peter was walking along in the camp one day, he came across a tent that he hadn't noticed before. It was a deep navy blue with many strange silver symbols stitched onto it. Curious, he ventured inside and came across the most beautiful woman that he had ever seen in his life.
She had long, beautiful flowing blond hair that seemed to flutter behind her in an unseen breeze. Her gown was of the softest, pale blue and was made of silk. When Peter entered the tent, she turned to face him and batted her vivid blue eyes at him, her full, red lips curving upwards in a gentle smile. "Hello, King Peter," she whispered, her voice seeming to ooze out of her like honey.
Peter stared at her, struggling to find his voice. "H-hello," he stammered. "W-who are you?"
The woman stood up and walked over to him, though it seemed as though she was gliding. "I am called Mary-Sue," she said, taking his hand.
They stared into each other's eyes for several minutes, before Peter, without any warning, suddenly burst into song.
"Once in every show
There comes a song like this.
It starts off soft and low
And ends up with a kiss.
Oh where is the song
That goes like this?
Where is it? Where? Where?"
Mary-Sue joined in as well, singing in the most beautiful voice Peter had ever heard.
"A sentimental song
That casts a magic spell.
They all will hum along.
We'll overact like hell.
For this is the song that goes like this.
Yes it is! Yes it is!"
Peter began to sing again.
"Now we can go straight
Into the middle eight,
A bridge that is too far for me."
Mary-Sue put her arms around him.
"I'll sing it in your face
While we both embrace,"
They both sang together.
"And then
We change
The key."
Peter was suddenly singing in a very high-pitched voice.
"Now we're into E!
(Ahem) That's awfully high for me."
Mary-Sue was looking at him oddly.
"But as everyone can see
We should have stayed in D."
They both started to sing together.
"For this is our song that goes like this!"
"I'm feeling very proud!" sang Peter.
"You're singing far too loud," sang Mary-Sue.
"That's the way that this song goes," muttered Peter.
"You're standing on my toes," sang Mary-Sue, and then they sang together again.
"Singing our song that goes like this!"
"I can't believe there's more!" belted Mary-Sue.
"It's far too long, I'm sure," sang Peter uncertainly, and Mary-Sue agreed.
"That's the trouble with this song.
It goes on and on and on."
"For this is our song that is too long!" they sang together.
"Jesus Christ! Goddammit!" shouted Peter.
"We'll be singing this till dawn!" cried Mary-Sue.
"You'll wish that you weren't born."
"Let's stop this damn refrain
Before we go insane."
"The song always ends like this!" they finished together, Mary-Sue's high note shattering the glass of the chandelier that was randomly hanging from inside the tent.
A/N: And now for some advertizing and some explinations: If anyone has finished the seventh Harry Potter book and is at all interested, I have a new story I'm working on, on my iheartmwpp account. Apparently it's pretty good, I already got 20 reviews in less than two days, more reviews than any of my other solo stories. So, if anyone is interested...Though it does mean that pretty soon I will probably put this aside in favor for that one, so if you don't see anything new for awhile, blame my other story, and know that this might be the last update until August when Raven gets back and forces me to go back to this one.