A/N: It might be more fun if you get a hold of the soundtrack from somewhere and actually listen to Can't Take It In while reading this, it'll probably be funnier that way…was for us at any rate…
Can't close my eyes…
They're super-glued…
Every hair on my body…
Has been ripped out by hot wax…
Oh empty my bowels,
I've got to make room for this pancake,
It's so much fatter than me…
OH NOOOO!!!
I'm a banshee…Anymore caviar?
I can't eat that pin.
You lack hatred…
You suck a lot…
Kitties are furry…
And oranges are not…
Unless they're moldy,
In which case it's not safe to eat them,
Or you'll probably die…
OOHHH NOOOOOOOOO!! (add ululations)
That man has fleas…anyone scared to death?
I vacuum trees…let us all munch on leaves!
I really need gin…
LAAAAAAA OHHHHHHH!
Got kicked in the shin…
OWWWWWWWWWW!!!!
I REALLY NEED GIN!!
WAHHHHHH!!!
(…extremely long bridge marred by numerous unintelligible noises…)
I like split peas…but not in my underwear…
What a story! You should read and review!
Can you take a hint?
Die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die…
More that I guffaw…
More than I ever upchucked…
DIEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
More that I wish death…
OHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
So hideous…
A/N: Raven: What a fun song! Fun, fun, fun, fun pickles!
iheartmwpp: Yes. Pickles. I do like me some pickles.
Raven: Are you going to eat that piece of carnage?
iheartmwpp: My carnage! STAY AWAY!!
Raven: Someone should probably stop you from killing people.
iheartmwpp: But it's so much fun!
Raven: I'm afraid this has gone on long enough. Okay, bring it in.
(Random guy): Here. (mutters) I don't get paid enough for this...
Raven: Excellent. Now DIEEEE!!1!!!1!!!one!!!!
iheartmwpp: ...Why are you munching on that pillow?
Raven: I was hungry and feathers taste good in my peanut butter. I like peanut butter. AND RITZ CRACKERS!!!
iheartwmpp: ...Yeah...So, in case anyone cares, we're obviously making fun of even the credits in this movie.
Raven: Everything in this movie will be BOMBASTED! LAMPOONED! MADE FUN OF FOREVERRRR!!
iheartmwpp: Nothing is spared our sick, sadistic, twisted, ironic, melancholy, meretricious, orange, star-shaped, bright, evil yet happy, bunny-like, flooding humor. NOTHING!!