"What took you so long?" Hermione asked. "And why didn't you just firecall like I asked?"
Harry shrugged and stepped through the front door into Hermione's living room, which was currently flanked with overflowing cardboard boxes. Ron had moved into Hermione's flat a few days before, and that process wasn't entirely finished yet.
"Needed the exercise, I suppose," said Harry. "It's nice, you know, living within walking distance of you."
"Come over here," she said. "There's something I should show you."
Harry sat down on the couch next to Hermione, who had her laptop open in front of her. She tilted it slightly so Harry had a clearer view of the screen.
"That's a browser window, right?" he asked.
"Yes. You've caught on quicker than Ron." Hermione did whatever it was she had to do to make the tiny arrow go where she wanted it to go. She moved the arrow up and down in a box, a box with columns and rows.
"See the column there titled 'Life?' And see how it's all numbers of days?"
"Yeah. So?"
"So," she said, "when a document turns 60 days old, it disappears."
"Right. OK. What does that have to do with us?"
"Harry, these are fan fiction archives."
Harry shot a blank look at Hermione, who groaned. "Don't you understand? The source of the stories literally dies after 60 days, just like our relationships did."
"Wait," said Harry. "So you think the reason George and I broke up, and you and Dra—Malfoy, and Ron and Oliver—you think that's because they just got to the point of death and disappeared?"
"Well, yes. I do."
"Hermione, that's the least logical explanation you've ever come up with for anything."
"That's what I told her," Ron said, walking into the room, three butterbeers in hand. He tossed one to Harry and handed another to Hermione, who smiled up at him. Ron sat down on her other side. "Doesn't make sense, does it? I told her it was probably just a coincidence. And it's not like any of the other couples have broken up." He paused. "Unless they have. Have you talked to Luna or Neville lately?"
"I saw Luna in Diagon Alley last week," said Harry. "She said she was starting an early search for Neville's birthday present. So, yeah, still together."
"Maybe she was just being nice and getting him a present post-breakup," Hermione said.
"Oh, I forgot to mention that she started telling me how brilliant Neville is in bed." Harry shuddered. "You can't un-hear these things."
Ron snorted and Hermione rolled her eyes. "OK, but that's one couple, and you knew they'd end up together eventually. They just needed some kind of impetus for it. That doesn't change the fact that all three of us felt something fall apart 60 days into our respective relationships."
"Wait, Harry, didn't you start to date George earlier than—"
Harry cut Run off. "No. I didn't. We went to Oliver's house about a week after George and I started fooling around, and we hadn't had an official date yet, just, you know." Harry felt his cheeks redden and didn't need to look at Ron to know that his had done the same. "Our first real date was that night. And that was the same day Hermione snogged Malfoy."
"Just call him Draco, Harry," Hermione said with a sigh. "You know you want to."
"Why would you want to call Malfoy by his first name?" Ron asked, sounding confused.
"They've been having dates lately, Harry, Draco, and Draco's lethifold," said Hermione, giggling.
"Oh, God, I don't even want to know what that's innuendo for."
"We haven't been having dates," Harry protested. "He just keeps showing up at my house after his stupid lethifold tries to kill me. And it's only happened twice."
"Twice? Is that why you didn't come over sooner?" asked Hermione.
Harry let out a sigh of his own and nodded. "I was just about to leave when Zion—"
"It has a name?"
Harry ignored Ron. "See, Zion tried to eat my foot, then Draco came in and explained that he'd gotten his pet a shock collar but it wasn't doing anything to stop him escaping. Then we tried to puzzle out, you know, why it's happening."
"And did you?" Hermione asked.
"No, there's just nothing," Harry said. "I thought it might have something to do with the life debt."
"That's a good theory," said Hermione.
"What?" Ron asked.
"Lethifolds can sense human emotions and needs," Hermione said patiently as Harry massaged his temples with his index fingers. "For Draco's pet to keep showing up at Harry's house, that indicates that Draco needs something from Harry, or perhaps Harry needs something from him, or perhaps they need something from each other."
Harry was on the edge of rolling his eyes when he had a sudden realization. "His wand!"
"Well, that's a bit much, don't you think, Harry?" Hermione asked, looking shocked. Ron choked on his butterbeer and Hermione clapped him on the back.
"Oh, come on, that's not what I meant and you know it," said Harry, exasperated. "I still have his old wand, remember?"
"You're right!" Hermione's eyes lit up.
"Why do you have that, anyway?" Ron asked.
"Theo Nott told me not to give it back to him," said Harry. "Said Draco had a new one."
"How did Theo Nott know you had it?" Hermione asked.
Harry's cheeks reddened. "I was standing outside their common room, holding it and ready to have a go at the password."
"Do the Slytherins even have a password for their common room?" asked Ron.
"Off the point," said Harry. "Anyway, Theo saw me and saw what I had and said not to worry about it, Draco's new wand was suiting him just fine and I should just break the old one in half and dispose of it."
"But you didn't do that," Hermione said.
"No. Of course not. It just felt too weird to destroy a wand."
Hermione nodded while Ron said, "But it was Malfoy's wand."
"Yeah, but he saved us once," said Harry. "And that just made me feel really odd about the whole thing. So it's still here."
"Great. That's really good thinking, Harry," Hermione said, sounding pleased. "When do you think you'll meet up with him?"
"Well, I suppose I'll put that on him," said Harry.
"Can you please think before you say something about Malfoy?" Ron looked disgusted, Hermione snickered, and Harry groaned.
"Sometimes I think we've only gotten worse over time," he said.