"Why is this castle so big?" Naruto grumbled.
Beside her, Ino shook his head. "I'm sure we're almost there," he said.
Leading them down a never-ending corridor were Ryouta and Ryou. After standing outside while Princess Yukie finished greeting the rest of the arriving nobles, the two guards had immediately taken Naruto and Ino aside to escort them to their rooms. They had been given rooms at the far end of the castle beside each other so they could stick together easier, as well as help collaborate their fake identities as brother and sister.
"Only a little further," Ryouta said, his younger brother remaining sullen and quiet. "When you get there, get situated and then prepare for dinner. Ryou will return to pick you up at 5:40 sharp."
Naruto scratched her cheek in thought as they passed a number of other rooms. "When will we get to talk to Yukie-sama?" she asked.
"Don't know, most likely at dinner," Ryouta replied simply. "She's very busy after all."
When they reached the end of the hallway, meeting another hallway going perpendicular to it, they arrived at their doors. As told, their rooms were beside one another, though the wide space between them gave a good example of how big the rooms were.
Before leaving, Ryouta and Ryou bowed to each of them, as though they really were nobles.
"Remember, 5:40. I don't want to have to wait," Ryou griped before the brothers backtracked down the hallway.
Naruto and Ino shared a glance, Naruto doing her best Ryou impression. Her face sagged and she pouted. "'I don't want to have to wait'," she groused moodily and Ino stifled a chuckle.
"Seriously, what's up his butt?" Ino added, rolling his eyes. He turned the doorknob to his room, opening the door a crack. "I'll come over when I'm finished getting dressed."
"Eh, why?" Naruto said blankly, the door to her room already open. She ignored it at the moment, more curious about Ino's reasoning than her quarter's interior.
"To help you with your makeup, there's no way in hell I'm letting you do that yourself," Ino replied, raising an eyebrow as though this fact was obvious.
"Makeup. . ." Naruto moaned.
"Now you really sound like Ryou."
Naruto crossed her arms over her chest, glaring slightly. "I bet you just want to come over so you can see yourself naked!" she countered haughtily.
"Why would I want to see my own body naked?" Ino snapped in frustration, his face turning red. Sure he missed his body, but not like that. He wasn't some narcissistic pervert that got by checking out his figure.
Cupping her breasts, Naruto gave Ino a sultry wink. "You miss them, don't you?"
Ino's eye twitched and his fists clenched at his hips. "As much as I've gotten used to you IN and SEEING my body, Naruto, touching it like that is still not allowed," he growled through gnashed teeth. "When we're back in our normal bodies, you'll never touch mine again, I guarantee that!"
"Then I better get as much out of it while I can!" Naruto exclaimed grinning wide, and disappeared into her room.
Ino was about to follow when someone turned the corner. He wore an attendant's uniform with long, stringy black hair. His clear blue eyes blinked at Ino, having discovered the source of the yelling. Slowly, he raised a single finger to his lips, signaling that he wanted Ino to quiet herself.
Ino's stomach insides turned annoyance as the attendant walked back around the corner.
With an exasperated snort, Ino entered his room, slamming the door. As he had though, the interior was expansive, richly decorated, smartly organized, and immaculately clean. The bed was enormous, with fine silk and satin sheets, and dozens of comfortable pillows. The floor was finely carpeted, and Ino considered the possibility that it might be as comfy as the bed.
Carefully crafted desks and cupboards rested against the walls, already filled with his clothes. A couch as relaxing as the bed, and almost as large, was on the far side of the room, facing a television so big, it encompassed most of the wall.
An entryway to a large, beautifully tiled bathroom was on the opposite side of the room from the bed. The shower was big enough for two people, as well as the marble spa. Two sinks in front of a long mirror and not a spot of dust anywhere. This was luxury.
Crossing the room to the far side, where long purple drapes shielded two massive windows, Ino tried hard to collect his awe. He had quickly realized that the room went to great efforts to make the occupant feel insignificant. Pulling the heavy drape aside wasn't easy, but when he had and he could look outside, Ino stared in wonder at the view.
"That's quite a drop . . ." he muttered to himself, involuntarily licking his lips.
The room truly was at the back of the castle. There was nothing behind her room but a giant drop into an iceberg covered, freezing ocean. He debated briefly whether he could survive the plunge, and decided that he probably could, but actually falling from there wasn't in his plans.
The room and the view made Ino feel like an insect.
Stepping away, Ino let himself fall into his bed, sinking into the covers and pillows. At least he had his own bed.
Naruto was equally impressed by her room's décor, a mirror image of Ino's. As Ryouta had stated, her belongings were already in the room and she hurried to unpack them. Unlike Ino, Naruto wasn't going to let herself be distracted by the room's grand stature. When her clothes and gear had been safely put away or prepared for later use, Naruto took the time to sit down on a cushioned ottoman.
With a frown, she pulled on her pinky, hoping it would curl like she wanted, but was only able to bend it by using her other hand. She wondered how Ino made it curl, how Ino could perform the Jutsu with such a bum finger, but Ino had been completely useless in providing any information.
"I just do it!" Ino had always replied.
"The uncurlable finger," Naruto muttered in disgust. The longer that finger refused to work, the longer she would be stuck in Ino's body. Making it curl was priority number one; it shouldn't have taken this long to learn the Jutsu. At least, Naruto wasn't used to it taking this long. She had mastered every Jutsu taught to her within hours, if not days. It had already been four days since the switch and it had felt like a lifetime.
Adapting to her body was still an issue. She hadn't training in anything except for the Jutsu, so punching, jumping, or throwing anything would be a little awkward if she had to fight.
"Bend you stupid, piece of crap!" she exclaimed, as if insulting her pinky would pressure it to curl.
There was a light knock at the door, and Naruto grunted in annoyance, wondering why Ino was already done changing. Ino just couldn't give her a minute alone, could he? Sighing, Naruto rose to her feet and crossed the room, opening the door angrily.
"It's not a race – Erk!" Naruto flinched and covered her mouth, eyes gone wide. Princess Yukie stood, in full royal garb, outside her room. "Ah, Yukie-sama, what . . . what are you doing here?" she stuttered nervously.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, it belongs to Kishimoto. If I
owned Naruto, I wouldn't be writing this fic.
"Dance is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire."
- George Bernard Shaw
A Mind Bending Inconvenience
A Naruto Story
By Hawk
A/N: This fic takes place AFTER the Naruto series, AFTER
Akatsuki has been defeated, and Sasuke is back in Konoha.
Characters that aren't dead in the Manga at CHAPTER 356
(when I started this) may or may not appear in this fic, even if
they die in the very next chapter. The Rookie Nine are all in their early 20's in this fic.
Chapter 6 – Dance, Dance Revolting
Yukie smiled, and while normally Naruto would have found it a beautiful thing to behold, this smile was not kind; it was serious, intimidating, sardonic. Naruto felt her pulse quicken and suddenly wanted to escape. This visit was definitely unexpected and, at the current time, unwanted.
"Hello again, Haruko-san, was it?" Yukie said with false pleasantry. "May I enter?"
"Ah . . ." Naruto looked from side to side, hoping someone else would abruptly show and drag her away, but no one came. "Um, of-of course, Yukie-sama," she said finally, and stepped back so the princess could come inside.
Yukie did so, softly closing the door behind her and Naruto swallowed at the sudden tension filling the air. Once they were alone, Yukie strode regally to middle of the room and sighed almost mournfully. "Haruko-san," she said then stopped, lifting a slim finger to her lips, trying to find the right words.
Naruto waited, patient and quiet, though her nervous were rattling.
Nodding to herself, Yukie started again, "Haruko-san, you're here with Uzumaki-san, correct?"
"Yes?" Naruto replied inelegantly.
"Then you know that I requested specifically for Uzumaki-san come. I didn't request anyone else, so I'm left wondering who you are and why you're here," Yukie said calmly, eyes narrowing slightly.
Naruto blinked at the intensity in Yukie's voice. The princess meant business. "Ah . . . I'm N –" and she stopped herself from continuing.
Who was she? She had almost told Yukie she was Naruto, which would have been a bad idea. No one could know the truth of the situation, not even the person they had to protect. If anyone caught wind of what had happened, protecting Yukie would become impossible, their mission likely forfeit in the process.
Internally, though, Naruto wanted to tell Yukie the truth. She wanted to let the princess know that she was Naruto, that Yukie should've been happy to see her, not Ino. It was so hard not to blurt it out, to claim the prize which was rightfully hers.
Instead, she bit her lip, holding back her frustration. Yukie couldn't know; it would complicate things and endanger her life even more.
"My name is Ino Yamanaka, Yukie-sama," Naruto said softly, though there was an undertone of bitter in her voice.
"Why are you here, Yamanaka-san?"
Naruto sighed noisily, dropping to the ottoman she'd recently vacated. "I was sent here to help Naruto and for added protection," she lied. "It made more sense to have two nobles rather than just one, so . . ."
Yukie ran her fingernails over one of the finely crafted desks. "I see. So you're only here to help and provide extra cover for Naruto-kun's back story. Is that all you're here for?"
"Well . . . I can read minds," Naruto added uneasily, scratching the base of her ponytail. It was a lie and yet at the same time it wasn't. Ino, when in her own body, could read minds. At the moment, that wasn't the case, so it was a lie, of sorts.
This perked Yukie's interest and her eyes widened in curiosity. "Oh, now that's . . . something worth having."
"Yeah, so I can look into people's minds and discover the conspirators by reading their thoughts," Naruto said with more confidence. She felt as though she had made her presence important for the mission.
"I see . . . that would come in handy," Yukie agreed, though she was clearly unhappy to admit it. She carefully lifted a small decorative vase, turning it over in her soft hands. Without looking at Naruto, she continued, "Tell me, what is your relationship with Naruto-kun?"
Confused, Naruto realized Yukie wasn't talking about her, but Ino in her body. And then that confused her further, and she lost her train of thought on the entire matter. She didn't understand what Yukie's question was about. Did Yukie want to know what her relationship was with Ino, or vice versa? She felt a headache coming.
"Uh . . . what do you mean?" Naruto asked, nervously fiddling with the end of her ponytail.
"Just that, Ino-chan. What is your relationship with the man in the next room?"
Naruto scratched her head, still not fully comprehending. How could she adequately describe her relationship with herself? With a sheepish grin, Naruto shrugged. "I dunno, I'd say we're pretty close," she said and chuckled knowingly; close was an understatement for two people sharing each other's bodies.
"Actually, I'd say I know him pretty well actually," she declared with a wry smile.
Yukie calmly put the vase back into place and lightly dragged her nails over the wooden top. The sound scratched at Naruto's eardrums, and she shuddered both from the noise and her own growing anxiety.
"Well then, perhaps you should read my mind and see what it is that I want," said Yukie with all the grace of a soon-to-be Queen. Her chin was slightly lifted and she proudly exuded a pompous manner.
"Uh . . . Okay . . ." Naruto replied, glancing off to the side in confusion. Shrugging to herself, she looked deep into Yukie's eyes, fighting the urge to blush, and made an awkward face of concentration. It was how she imagined her expression should look while reading another person's mind. In the end she thought she probably looked like she was taking a dump.
"So, do you see now?" Yukie asked frankly, a single eyebrow rising.
Naruto wanted to shake her head a negative, but nodded, as if she had actually read the Princess' mind. "Yup, read your mind. I understand completely," she lied blandly. She had no clue what was going on and hoped the conversation didn't go any further.
Yukie walked to the door. "Good. I'll see you on the dance floor."
And with that she was gone, door softly closed behind her.
"What . . . just happened?" Naruto mumbled then sat up straight. "Dance floor?"
Ino laid out his suit jacket on his bed, having pulled it from his pack. Inspecting the hidden pockets on the inside, he double checked them for weapons, making sure each was full. He was in the middle of changing, wearing only a nice button up shirt, a black vest and boxers with kunai designs.
Ino shook his head thinking about it and wondered how many other ninja owned such underwear. He fingered the pockets on his vest, testing their opening speed. Like a snake, he whipped a flap open and then a blade was whizzing across the room, embedding itself in the wall.
Nodding to himself, he walked over to the kunai and yanked it free, sliding it back into its hiding place. There was a knock at the door and Ino shook his head. Naruto couldn't do anything by herself.
Marching to the door, Ino yanked it open. "Can't you do anything, Naruto?" he snapped.
Yukie smiled at Ino, looking him up and down, taking in his state of attire. An eyebrow lifted when she took in his boxers. "Talking to yourself, Naruto-kun?"
"Ah, Yukie-sama! Wh-what . . . to ah . . . what do I um . . . owe the pleasure?" he asked nervously, tugging at the collar of his shirt. When she stepped into the room uninvited, he stepped back, trying to stay out of her way. He really didn't like the look in her eyes.
"What do you mean by that, Naruto-kun?" she replied after shutting the door behind her. The two were alone and suddenly the expansive room felt incredibly cramped. "You know why I'm here!"
"I do?" Ino muttered, raising an eyebrow in bewilderment. He flinched when Yukie wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tightly. Standing stock still, Ino made no move to return the display of affection. "Ah . . . Yukie-sama, are you alright?"
"You dolt!" she exclaimed excitedly, leaning back and holding Ino at arm's length. "We haven't seen each other in so long and this is how you react?"
"Yeah – well, uh . . . I really – what should I be saying?" Ino said vacantly. His senses and defenses were completely out of whack, completely unsure of how he should act. The future Queen of the country had embraced him so tightly and abruptly that his mind had been temporarily blown. He really hoped he didn't get randomly aroused.
"Aren't you happy to see me?"
"Ah . . . yeah, of course! I just . . . wasn't expecting you . . . and I'm in my underwear," Ino finally managed, coherent thoughts returning. He blushed beet red when Yukie looked pointedly at his state of undress. He definitely didn't want to become aroused now.
Yukie stepped further into the room, until she was standing beside Ino's bed. The tips of her fingers trailed over the heavy comforter before she took a seat on it and smiled. "That's alright, Naruto-kun, I don't mind."
Ino struggled to think, normally one of his strong points. 'This must be how Naruto feels all the time,' he mused. Truly, Ino had no idea what to do with Yukie there, sitting on his bed, obviously trying to come onto him in some way. His mouth hung open at the realization. The future Queen of this country was subtly hinting that she wanted to have sex with him, or Naruto rather.
Ino swallowed heavily. "Ah . . . Yukie-sama, I'm sorry, but – "
Yukie raised a hand, silencing Ino. "If this is about your 'close' friend next door, I've already spoken with her."
"You've . . . what? Why did you talk to her?"
Her hand was still running over the bed's comforter. "I wanted to know her intent."
"Her intent to what?"
"Her intent with you."
Ino barked out a laugh. "There's nothing between us, Yukie-sama, don't worry," he stated, shaking his head.
"Really, because she said that you two were 'pretty close' and that she knows you 'pretty well'," Yukie replied, rising to her feet. She seemed resigned to the fact that Ino wasn't going to join her on the bed. Any other man would have; that's what made Naruto special, she thought.
"She said that?" Ino asked weakly, and to Yukie it appeared as though Naruto was stunned by the revelation.
"Ino-chan also stated that she could read minds, so I let her read mine," Yukie continued.
"She did?" Ino muttered, shoulders slumping. "And?"
Yukie opened the door to the room, preparing to exit. "She knows how I feel. I apologize for having eyes for you, Naruto-kun, but I will be pursuing you while you're in Ino-chan's company. I look forward to dancing with you at dinner tonight," she said before stepping out.
"Pur . . . suing . . .?"
Naruto had just pulled on her panties when the door burst open. She squealed in surprise and instinctively flung the closest object at the intruder.
Ino ducked the chair and it slammed into the open doorway. With a deft back kick, he launched it through the door frame and out of the room.
"What the hell! Can't you knock?" Naruto snapped, hands on her hips. She was completely naked but for the underwear she had just slipped on. Her mouth dropped when she say Ino's state of undress. "Why aren't you wearing any pants? You walked through the castle pant less!"
Brushing off Naruto's complaints and ignoring the sight of his body barely clothed, Ino marched right up to Naruto, towering over her. "I was just visited by Yukie," he growled.
Naruto stepped back, but Ino followed the move. "So was I!" Naruto shot back. Her butt bumped into her bed and she fell back on it into a sitting position. She crossed her arms over her chest.
Ino continued to lean over her. "I know, and because of YOU she thinks we're in some kind of relationship!"
"What? Why?"
Ino ignored Naruto's questions, blazing on in his anger. "Not only that, but she declared that she was interested in me and would be stealing me away from you."
Naruto blinked, brow furrowing in confusion. "Yukie's a lesbian?" Her mouth dropped open as dozens of perverted images began filtering through her mind.
"No! Not you, me! She wants me, in your body! She wants Naruto!" Ino raged, throwing his hands up. He fell forward forcing Naruto on her back and slammed both his hands down around her shoulders, trapping her in place. "She wants you, but I'm in your body, so she wants me!"
There was a long moment of silence as Naruto processed everything Ino had said. She winced as Ino's chest heaved from all the yelling, each deep breath it pressed heavily against her bare breasts. Something sharp in the pockets poked her soft skin each time.
"I have no clue what you just said," Naruto said finally, completely lost and slightly overwhelmed. She wasn't accustomed to being pinned to a bed by another man, let alone herself. Considering how messed up the entire situation was, Naruto had little idea how to deal with the close proximity of Ino.
"Because of you, Yukie thinks WE'RE together and she's not happy about it! Do you know how awkward that is?"
"Well . . ." Naruto started, "what we're doing right now probably isn't helping. I'm really not that type of girl, Ino. Sure I'm already in my panties, but you have to feed me if you want to get past those."
Ino grunted in disgust, pushing away from the bed and Naruto's nude body. "Put something on, would you," he grumbled in disgusted and turned away. Crossing the room, he slammed the door shut.
Sitting up, Naruto stretched her neck and back. "I was putting something on before you rushed in here like a wild boar," she retorted irritably. Her nipples were hard and sensitive from Ino's chest rubbing against them, and she grimaced as she pulled on her bra. "Whatever's in your vest was poking me."
"Sorry, I'm just prepared for if something happens tonight," Ino muttered and plopped down on the chair that hadn't been thrown out the door.
"Those are some sharp condoms."
"Ha, ha, very funny, pervert."
"At least what was poking me was in your vest and not in your boxers."
Ino sighed heavily, burying his head in his hands.
"Explain again what the hell happened, 'cause Yukie came over here too and was asking me questions about you and me and then told me to read her mind," Naruto said and sat back down on the bed.
"She pretty much just declared her intention to win me from you. She thinks that you and I are . . . together, and intends on stealing me away," Ino explained, frustrated by the complicated discussion and equally complicated situation.
"I'm still not following. Who does she want?" Naruto asked, scratching the side of her temple.
Ino inhaled deeply. "She wants 'Naruto', and since she thinks that you and I are a couple, thanks to you, she intends to steal 'Naruto', in other words, ME, away from YOU."
"She wants me?" Naruto exclaimed, jumping to her feet, eyes wide with excitement.
"She wants male you," Ino corrected, "which would be me right now. She was trying to sleep with me in my room."
"And you didn't do it!" Naruto bemoaned, dropping to her knees in horror. "What have you done? Now my manhood is in question! Yukie thinks I don't want her."
"I don't want her!"
"You may not, but I do! Now go find her and do her!" Naruto yelled, pointing to the door.
Shaking his head, Ino started to stand, planning on leaving if only to get away from Naruto.
"Wait!" Naruto cut him off, pointing at Ino fiercely. "You can't do her. Only I get to do her. I forbid you from doing Yukie."
Clenching his fists, Ino tilted his head to the side, a strained sneer on his lips. "I'm not doing anyone, Naruto."
"Good, good." Naruto was wringing her hands together, plotting. She looked devious and it scared Ino to see such a sinister and perverted look on her face.
"You're . . . sick, Naruto."
Naruto scoffed in annoyance. "Well, you're the one getting all the attention that I should be getting. If it weren't for you, I'd be with Yukie right now making sweet, sweet –"
Ino's hand clamped over Naruto's mouth. "Stop, no more. I don't want to listen to myself talk about having sex with another woman. Let's just get you ready and then I'll finish getting dressed."
Pulling Ino's hand from her mouth, Naruto pouted. "Fine, but you had better not screw things up with Yukie. When I get back into my body, I want her to still want me."
"I'm not going to hit on her for you," Ino said and walked into the bathroom.
"I'm not asking you to hit on her for me, just let her know that I'm available," Naruto called after him. She watched as Ino walked out of the bathroom, makeup case in his hands. The sight of it made Naruto grimace.
Ino pulled his chair over to where Naruto sat and plopped down into it, popping open the case. "Well, you just remember that we're here to protect her, not 'bone' her. You wouldn't want to sleep with her if she was dead."
"Yeah, I suppose so," Naruto agreed, frowning. "I don't see why I need makeup."
"It won't be a lot and it'll make you look good."
"I already look good without makeup," Naruto grumbled and pouted.
Ino turned away, a blush creeping into his face. Naruto had inadvertently given him a compliment, and probably hadn't even realized it. When he regained his composure, Ino reached into the case and withdrew a stick of mascara.
Naruto tried not to blink as Ino applied a light amount of mascara to her eyelashes. A dash of blush and swipe of lipstick and she was gorgeous. When Naruto looked at herself in the mirror, wearing nothing but bra and panties, her face enhanced, she blushed heavily. If she were a man again, she would've found it hard not to jump Ino.
"What're you smiling about?" Ino asked.
"I just look good."
Ino crossed his arms, smiling cockily. "I think you mean, 'I' look good," he corrected.
"Alright, that's good enough. You can go finish while I put on my dress," Naruto said bluntly, scratching the back of her neck. It was bad enough to have Ino help put on her makeup; Naruto didn't want him around when she put on her dress.
"You can do the earrings?" Ino asked as he stood.
"Yeah, yeah, no problem. I have experience sticking sharp metal things through flesh."
Ino left, shaking his head, and hurried to his room before anyone saw him wandering around in his kunai boxers. Upon entering his room, he hurriedly slipped on his dress pants, tucking in his button up and undershirt. He stole a glance at himself in the mirror, admiring how good he looked in his tuxedo. He still had to put on his tie and jacket, but thus far, Ino appreciated what he saw.
As it turned out, he found it incredibly hard to put on his tie. He tried five times but it never seemed to wrap and knot correctly. After the sixth attempt, he threw it down in frustration. "Orange monstrosity," he grumbled. Why Naruto had packed an orange tie with his tuxedo was beyond him.
A light knock at the door drew Ino's attention and he narrowed his eyes at it. The only person he was expecting was Naruto, but the knock was so soft and un-Naruto like that Ino was afraid Yukie might have returned. There was another knock, this one a little more urgent, and Ino strode to the door quickly, annoyed with his tie and this interruption. His frustration was getting worse and the night had barely begun.
Yanking it open, he started to glare, but it faltered immediately. His mouth dropped. "W – wow . . . I look good," he muttered, looking Naruto up and down. The dress was a calm sunset orange and it hugged Naruto's curves smoothly. It ran down to Naruto's feet and a long slit in the dress ran up her left leg to her thigh. It was both sleeveless and backless, showing off a generous amount of skin and cleavage.
Naruto was blushing in embarrassment. "Thanks, will you let me in already?" she mumbled and stepped inside when Ino finally made room. "It's hard to move."
"That dress is a little much, don't you think?" Ino asked as his mouth fell agape. "There's a reason why I've never worn it."
"Well, considering I bought it for Sakura-chan as a present and found it in your closet, I figured it was only right that I wear it," Naruto explained. She stumbled into the room, adjusting to her heels. "Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why'd you have this dress? I gave it to Sakura-chan as a present."
"Well, she – " A knock on the door cut off Ino's response and he couldn't help the involuntary eye twitch. "I'm about ready to kick that door out."
"Satoshi Motou," Ryou said from the other side, using Ino's fake name. "I'm here to escort you and your sister to the party." He sounded bored.
"One minute," Ino called back then turned to Naruto. "Help me with my tie, would you? I can't get the damn thing to work."
When Naruto finished tying Ino's tie, and Ino slid on his jacket, the two admired themselves in the mirror. "I do look damn handsome," Naruto said of Ino, then reached over and adjusted Ino's tie, straightening it. The orange matched perfectly with Naruto's dress.
"Alright, let's go protect a horny princess," Ino said clapping his hands together.
Ryou looked none too pleased, waiting for them with arms crossed and a sour expression. He gave Ino and Naruto a passing glance, not even lingering on Naruto's stunning figure.
The fact that Ryou didn't ogle her wasn't overlooked by Naruto, who narrowed her eyes at the guard in annoyance. Here she was dressed to kill, showing off ample amounts of flesh, and the man didn't even give her a second glance. With that in mind, she pressed her breasts together, doubling her cleavage, and leaned toward Ryou.
"Thanks for the pick up," she said sweetly and gave him a seductive smile.
"Whatever, come on." Ryou walked down the hallway, leaving Ino and Naruto in front of the door.
Naruto leaned over to Ino. "I think he's gay," she whispered. "You try hitting on him."
"I'm not going to hit on him." Ino replied shaking his head and started after Ryou.
"Yeah, good idea. Don't want Ryou telling the princess I'm gay." She rushed to catch up to the guard.
Ino's eye twitched and he grit his teeth. "I know, Haruko-ane," he bit out.
Scurrying to Ryou's side (as running in her dress was quite hard) Naruto stepped in front of the young man, halting his advance. "Don't I look good, Ryou-san?" she asked demurely.
Ryou's eyes went up and down Naruto's body once. "You look trashy," he said simply and stepped around her.
With a shake of her head and shrug, Naruto turned to Ino. "I'm telling you, he's gay. Why're both your eyes twitching?"
"What does he mean you look trashy? That's my body he's talking about," Ino growled. He cracked his knuckles violently. "I'll show him what's trashy when I stuff his head into a garbage can."
Naruto grabbed Ino's fists, pushing them down. "We can't kill him!" she ordered firmly. "We'd get lost in this castle without him. After he leads us to the party we can kill him."
"When you enter, you'll be announced again. Do not forget who you are," Ryou said plainly as they stood outside a pair of gigantic doors. Ornate trees and plants were carved into the wood, evidence of the Spring Country now gone.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm Satoshi, she's Haruko. We know who we are. We're professionals," Ino replied grumpily. He wasn't too fond of Ryou anymore, insulted by his lack of interest in Naruto. Ryou had done nothing but beat down Ino's ego. Every insult directed at Naruto was one that hit Ino too.
"I have yet to see proof of that," Ryou retorted coldly. "You're already ten minutes late."
Naruto brushed off Ryou's cold response, rubbing her hands together excitedly. "I can't wait for this dinner party, combines two of my favorite things: Dinner and party."
"And dance, which you both will be expected to partake in."
"Ugh, how do I keep forgetting about the dancing?" Naruto grimaced, not looking forward to other men grabbing her and leading her around the dance floor.
"I'm not bad, but . . . I don't know how to lead." Ino added.
As they turned a corner and drew closer to the castle's Great Hall, a servant walked past. His attention snapped to them, his sharp blue eyes studying Naruto and Ino as they passed. His gaze lingered on Ino a moment longer than normal, which didn't go unnoticed.
Naruto nudged Ino, leaning to whisper in his ear. "Ryou may not be into your body, but that servant seems to like mine."
Ino cracked his knuckles. "That's ten when we change back," he muttered.
Like earlier in the day, they were introduced as the Motou siblings to the assembled mass inside the Great Hall. There was a short applause, mostly from the working servants, before Ryou showed them to their table. Soft music was already playing and a few couples were dancing on the open floor. Food covered every bit of their plates, waiting to be feasted on. Naruto licked her lips at the sight.
Across from them sat an elderly couple. They wore fine clothes and jewelry, but nothing that put them over the top. They smiled as Naruto and Ino took their seats.
"You two make such a cute couple," the older woman said kindly.
Ino gave her an incredulous look. They had only a moment before been introduced as brother and sister. He turned to Naruto, but she was fully distracted by the food, shoveling it in her mouth as fast as she could.
"It's so good!" Naruto crowed, pleasure washed across her face, chopsticks clutched in her fist.
"Calm down, would you," Ino hissed.
"Now, now," the old woman cut in, "it's normal for a young woman to be so hungry."
Her husband snorted, ignoring his wife to focus on his dinner.
"See?" Naruto smiled and stuck out her tongue.
"It's shows signs of being ready to bear a child," the old woman finished with a happy smile.
"Whaaaaaaat?" Ino moaned and covered his face with his hands.
Naruto put down her chopsticks. "Suddenly, I'm not so hungry."
A new song started, and the old woman slowly pushed herself to her feet. Her husband looked up at her from his food, a sudden grin appearing on his wrinkled face. He rose and took her hand, leading her to the dance floor, leaving the embarrassed ninjas alone.
"Crazy old people," Naruto muttered as she and Ino watched the elderly couple start a slow dance.
Ino sighed. "Yeah . . ." he mumbled as he gazed at the two. "But look at them, how happy they are."
Naruto looked at Ino instead, surprised by the tone of his voice. It was soft, wistful almost, a longing happiness that Ino rarely displayed. Smiling, Naruto was about to agree when another man took a seat at their table. He was older than them, but smaller in height, his body thick with muscle. Grey flecks sprinkle a neatly trimmed black beard. Scars covered his face, along with his arms, which were abnormally long for his short stature.
"Hello," he grunted, a gruff, sticky sound. "I am Hayato Hiyashin, head of Yukie-sama's security."
Naruto glanced around for Yukie, finding her dancing with another noble. She was smiling warmly as the noble spoke.
"Pleasure to meet you, Hiyashin-san, I am Satoshi Motou, and this is my sister Haruko. How may we help you?" Ino replied pleasantly.
"You can shove the act, I know who you are," Hayato grumbled. "In the coming days, we'll be keeping in close contact. Yukie-sama is . . . very precious to the people of Spring Country. If anything were to befall her, I wouldn't be able to live with myself." He looked at Ino directly. "It's thanks to you, Uzumaki-san, that this is all possible."
Naruto's eyes narrowed in annoyance, jealous of Ino receiving the praise meant for her.
"Ah, it's really a team effort," Ino said, attempt to redirect the compliment.
"Our intelligence believes the attack will most likely occur during Yukie-sama's coronation."
"Do you have any idea who's behind it?" Naruto asked.
"We believe it's a rebel group of Cloud ninja and Lightening soldiers. We think their leader is Sakuma Shikiima, a former Cloud ninja, now S-Rank criminal," Hayato said.
Ino shook his head. "I don't get what they want. What does a bunch of rebels gain from killing Yukie-sama?"
"That's what we're trying to figure out."
A young noble woman appeared by the table, head held high. She stared hungrily at Ino. "Excuse me, Motou-san, but would you care to dance?"
Ino and Naruto blinked, surprised by the young woman's bold approach. "Ah, no, thank you, I'm slightly busy at the moment," Ino said with a wave of his hand.
The noble woman reached out, latched onto Ino's wrist, and pulled him from his seat. "I don't take no for an answer." She began dragging Ino to the dance floor, who sputtered in confusion.
Naruto and Hayato shared a glance, both shaking their heads in amusement. Hayato smiled at Naruto, extending a hand. "Would you care to dance, Yamanaka-san?"
Naruto eyed the man's hand and leaned back in her seat. "You look like you've been in a lot of battles, Hiyashin-san."
"I have."
"You ever have your nuts cut off in any of them?"
"N-No, of-of course not!" Hayato stuttered indignantly, pulling back his offered hand.
"You want them to be? Because that's what you're asking me right now," Naruto threatened, a flash of warning in her eyes.
"You are . . . quite the lady, Yamanaka-san." Hiyashi stood and left, leaving Naruto sitting alone. From her table she watched Yukie and Ino dancing with new partners, noticing that Ino was having problems leading, but was adapting well. Yukie broke away from her partner and crossed the dance floor, finding Ino. There was a short conversation before Ino took Yukie's hand, unable to refuse the future Queen's request.
Naruto crossed her arms over her chest, leaned back in her seat, and glared at the two. She watched as Yukie gripped Ino tightly, smiling and laughing. Without noticing, Takehiko Mino, one of the nobles from the Land of Lightening, had moved to Naruto's side.
"You're sitting all alone, Motou-san," he said, full of self-confidence. A smug smile graced his lips as he looked down on Naruto. "Perhaps you should be on the dance floor."
Naruto inhaled through her nose, frustration showing. "Fine," she grumbled, rising to her feet. Takehiko took her hand without waiting, eagerly dragging Naruto to the dance floor. Naruto shuffled uncomfortably in her tight dress, glaring at Ino and Yukie the entire time. She ignored Takehiko as he took her hand and drew her close, placing his other hand on the small of her back.
It wasn't until Naruto felt Takehiko's breath on her face that she started paying attention to the man.
Ino glanced at Naruto from the corner of his eyes, sweating profusely. Yukie had been gushing over him since the moment they started dancing. Wide smiles and suggestive touches had shaken Ino's nerves. The Princess' hands had slid from Ino's shoulders to around his back, clinging tight, purposefully pushing her breasts against Ino's chest.
"You're so quiet, 'Motou-san'," Yukie teased. "I expected you to be happier."
Ino laughed nervously. "I'm just on guard is all. People want to kill you, remember?"
"I'm not worried. You'll protect me." Yukie pulled Ino closer, if that were at all possible, breathing hotly on Ino's neck.
"Sorry," Naruto muttered unapologetically. She scanned the crowd of dancers, mostly focusing on Ino and Yukie.
Takehiko grimaced, his toes aching from abuse. "It's quite alright, Motou-san. I'm not doing the best job leading. Your beauty distracts me from the pain."
"Uh, thanks."
"So, do tell me all about your village," Takehiko said. He winced as Naruto stepped on his foot again.
"It's . . . hot," Naruto lied. "And rocky and dusty."
"Sounds rugged and tough. Like your personality. I like it."
"You like what? My village or my personality?"
"Both. Tell me, what do what you like?"
". . . Cake."
"You're making it hard for me to do my job, Yukie-sama," Ino said.
"Am I? Good, I want to make it hard for you, Naruto-kun" Yukie whispered, lips brushing Ino's ear.
"That's uh . . . not what I meant."
Yukie giggled, placing a hand on Ino's cheek. "Still so naïve. Besides, where can I be any safer than in my protection's arms?"
Ino hated to admit that Yukie had a point. The Princess was completely safe there, dancing in his arms. The thought made Ino nervous. What if Yukie decided she needed to spend the night for further protection? He glanced around the room until he found Naruto in the arms of another noble and he narrowed his eyes in confused disgust.
Ino's attention snapped back to his dance partner. "Ah, Y-Yukie-sama, that's my b-butt you're grab-grabbing."
"I know."
"Please stop squeezing it."
Takehiko laughed boisterously. "You're hilarious, Motou-san!"
Naruto gave a nervous chuckle in return. "Yeah, thanks."
"What else do you like? Please, tell me," Takehiko asked warmly.
"Um . . ." Naruto looked across the room, spying Ino and meeting his eyes. She ignored Ino's confused expression and thought for a moment about the Yamanaka ninja. "I like . . . flowers," she said and turned her attention back to Takehiko.
"Lovely," Takehiko said. "Flowers truly are nature's most beautiful feature. I am an avid collector and have a great garden in my estate."
"Oh, well that's nice," Naruto muttered and looked away from Takehiko in disgust.
"Why do you like flowers, Motou-san? Is it because their beauty reminds you of yourself? Or perhaps of men like me?"
As much as the question made Naruto want to throw up on Takehiko's shoes, it did make her wonder. Why did Ino like flowers so much? Was it because of her family business? Her parents had probably raised her to appreciate them, of course, but there had to be more to it than that. Obviously Ino was a girl, though not at the moment, and girls seemed to love flowers. To Naruto, that's what flowers were used for: to give to girls to make them happy. She supposed they also helped make houses pleasant.
It wasn't like ramen. Naruto understood why she loved ramen. The taste, the texture, the hundreds of different recipes. The feeling of satisfaction and warmth in her belly after finishing a bowl. Eating a flower was pointless; it wouldn't fill a stomach or warm a body on a cold night. She couldn't use a flower as a weapon, at least, not that she knew of. Naruto understood very little about them, and thus saw little value in the flowers Ino's family so graciously culled and grew.
"Is something wrong, Motou-san?"
"I don't know."
"What don't you know?"
Naruto shook her head. "Why I like flowers."
The passing minutes only confirmed Ino's fears. "I think I'd be much safer in your room tonight," Yukie had whispered. "Don't you agree?"
"We-well, Yukie-sama, I just–I don't think–think that's a great idea. People might get the wrong idea," Ino stuttered. "You have to put up a royal appearance."
Yukie halted their dance, stepping back from Ino, appearing none too pleased with the direction the conversation had gone. "Are you that attached to her?"
Ino's face contorted in confusion. "What? Who?"
"Your partner."
"I told you, there's nothing between us."
"That's why you've spent more time looking at her than me," Yukie countered.
"We're communicating, Yukie-sama," Ino lied. "We're doing our job."
This placated the Princess, who lowered her head in embarrassment. "Oh, I just–"
"Your Highness, we're doing everything to protect you, nothing more. As it is, I need to get her away from her current dance partner who is distracting her too much, so if you'll excuse me." Ino bowed low. "There are many more who want to dance with you." He gestured to a number of noble men that stood around the dance floor trying to look inconspicuous.
"I suppose you're right," Yukie muttered.
"Don't worry, Princess, we're keeping an eye on things," Ino stated, nodded his head, and strode across the dance floor.
"How can you not know?" Takehiko said, smiling broadly. His pompous charm was making Naruto sick. She wanted to punch him in his snobby, pampered face.
"Excuse me, Mino-san, was it?"
Naruto and Takehiko turned to Ino surprised. "Ah, Haruko-san's brother!" Takehiko exclaimed.
"Yes, I'm sorry to intrude, but I'd like to dance with my sister for a bit," Ino declared.
Takehiko stepped back, releasing Naruto, and bowed. "Haruko-chan, if I may address you as such, it was a pleasure dancing with you. I look forward to dancing with you another time."
"Uh, thanks," Naruto muttered and gave the noble a strained smile.
Takehiko nodded to Ino and turned away, his long braid swooshing behind him.
"He's cute," Ino said with an appraising glance.
"And you're a man, so . . . stop looking."
Ino shook his head and extended a hand to Naruto. "You looked like you needed a rescue."
Naruto smiled and placed her hand in Ino's, watching as it was gently engulfed by Ino's larger fingers. "Yeah, thanks. He was getting a little too touchy feely for me."
"So how're we going to do this?" Ino asked.
"I'll teach you how to lead, I guess," Naruto replied and placed her free hand on Ino's shoulder. "Put your hand on my back."
Ino did, his large hand covering Naruto's upper back.
"No lower," Naruto said and shuddered when Ino's hand slid down her body to cradle the small of her back. It felt . . . weird. "Yeah there," she mumbled softly. "Now just kind of, pull me along. Not too fast, move with the music."
"I know how to move with the music, idiot."
Naruto collected herself at the insult. "Could've fooled me. You were moving like a spastic gorilla with the Princess."
"Yeah, well I lost count how many times you stepped on Mino-san's feet."
"Those were all planned to make him back off."
"Of course they were."
Without realizing it the two had begun moving together in an easy, fluid dance. It was slow, nothing too impressive, but there was nothing wrong with it either. They looked and felt comfortable with their simple dance. Four steps, slow turns, nothing fancy.
"I have to say: I look amazing in that dress," Ino said, nodding his head. "Lots of cleavage."
Naruto glanced down at her chest. "Yeah, I like the view."
"That should be eleven, but I'll let it slide since it is a nice view."
"Look at us, agreeing on things," Naruto said with a grin.
"Next thing you know we'll be in our own bodies."
"Yeah . . . and this great view will be gone." Naruto paused then looked up at Ino. "Why do you like flowers? I mean, I know it's your family's business, but I don't really get it."
"That's an odd question coming from you. Why do you want to know?"
"Just curious," Naruto said and shrugged. "I wanna know what it is about them that you like."
Ino's eyebrow rose. "Are you trying to get to know me, Naruto?"
"Never mind, I was just aski–"
"No, no, I'll tell you why," Ino cut in. "It is partly because of the family business. Growing up my parents taught me all there was to know about them. It made me really appreciate them."
"Okay, so you like them because of your family?" Naruto asked, disappointed by the answer.
"There's more to it than just that."
"Like what?"
"Well, while a flower may not fill your stomach like your ramen, it does have thousands of different species, like ramen has different recipes. Each flower has a different smell, a different purpose in the world. Different animals and bugs use the flowers, spread the pollen which helps other plants grow, in turn feeding us. It's co-evolution. They provide us with medical ingredients as well as herbs for your dinner. Without flowers, we humans would be dead."
"Oh . . ." Naruto mumbled.
"Were you expecting my reason to be something more superficial?"
"Well, yeah. You're a girl. I was thinking more along the lines of, 'I like roses because they remind me of myself as a ninja: Beautiful to look at, but dangerous to try and hold'. Something cheesy like that," Naruto said dismissively. She blew at a strand of hair that fell in her face.
"Be-beautiful? W-what?" Ino stuttered, a heavy blush flushing his cheeks. Had Naruto compared his female body to a rose and unintentionally called him beautiful? Or had she knowingly done that?
As she danced with another noble, a plump, older man, Princess Yukie couldn't help but stare at Naruto and Ino. There was nothing special about the way they were dancing. They weren't holding each other close, they weren't spinning or dipping, but they looked content, relaxed. Naruto was even blushing!
Yukie's stare turned into a glare. The Princess wasn't the only one looking at the couple. Many eyes in the room were watching them, each with different reason.
"There's something wrong with those two."
"There is something . . . off . . . about them. They're not what I was expecting. Will their presence be a hindrance to the plan?"
"No. Not in the slightest."
Tusnade rubbed her temples to ward off the growing headache. She read over the report for a third time, believing her anger might light the papers on fire.
"Jounin Yamanaka Ino has not been seen in village for the past two days. Extensive searches have revealed nothing of her whereabouts. Jounin Yamanaka Ino has not returned to her home, her parents, or any other known locations she is expected. She has not reported for repeated mission briefings and is believed to have left the village without proper notification."
As she started to crumple the report in her hand, a knock came from her door. Her hand loosened on the papers. "Enter."
The doors swung open and four individuals stepped inside.
"You wanted to see us, Tsunada-sama?" Sakura asked.
"There's a problem," Tsunada replied.
"There's always a problem," Shikamaru muttered.
"Let me guess, it involves Naruto?" Kakashi added, a smile visible under his mask.
"Naruto and Ino."
"Ino?" Choji shook his head in surprise, wild mane of hair rustling.
"There was an incident between the two of them a couple of days ago. It's hard to believe, but they . . . switched bodies."
"What?"
"What?"
"Huh?"
"That would explain some of their erratic behavior," Shikamaru mumbled, thinking of when Naruto had slapped Ino. But no, if they had switched, then Ino had slapped Naruto. And the two of them spending the night together. He sighed, relieved to have made sense of everything.
"Naruto is IN Ino's body!" Sakura exclaimed, clenching her fists.
"Lucky dog," Kakashi stated, nodding his head, images of his sexy books floating through his thoughts.
"As much as I'm annoyed to admit it, they tricked me. I was too gullible to believe Naruto . . . Ino. Naruto had a mission in Spring Country and if I'm right and they didn't switch back, then I sent Ino there in Naruto's body." She slid the report across the table where Kakashi picked it up. "Meanwhile, 'Ino' has been missing since 'Naruto' left, which leads me to believe that they both went to Spring Country. If they're still in the wrong body, they're going to need help."
"So we're heading to Spring Country?" Shikamaru summarized.
"You are to go and assist the two in their mission then escort them back here for punishment. What you've been told here today is top-secret. No one is to know about what's happened between the two . . . ever. There will be extreme consequences for all of you if word gets out about this. Do I make myself clear?"
The four ninja nodded.
"Then go. And hurry, before those two get into more trouble than they can handle."
In a flash the four were gone, sprinting from the room.
Tsunade fell back into her chair, shoulders slumping with a sigh. "Idiot . . ." she muttered to herself.
Next Time: Chapter 7 – Party Crashers
Another night, another dinner party, but this one goes differently from the first. Unexpected guests are never welcome and even the best and worst kept secrets can come to light.
A/N: Sorry for the delay. Had wicked writer's block which seems to have gone for the time being. This chapter is longer than the previous one, so yay for that, right? Next chapter is probably going to be very short, so hopefully that means I'll get it out faster. Not much to say here, other than thanks for reading and waiting patiently.