KPOV

When I wake up, I feel overheated. I can't place where I am and it makes me think of when Peeta and I were in the cave and he had the fever. I look next to me quickly, seeing the sweet face of Christian. I look down and he has a leg thrown over mine and an arm across my middle. That explains why I'm so hot. The problem is I really have to pee. I carefully edge myself from under him and thankfully he rolls over enough for me to get up.

I look back at him, sound asleep, no worries it seems. He looks younger asleep, though I guess most people do. I rush into the bathroom because I want to be near him again as soon as possible. I spot my torn panties on the floor and feel the heat rise on my face and a different kind of wetness between my legs. I will my pee to go faster but my bladder is full and needs to be emptied completely.

I wash my hands when I'm done and luckily find some mouthwash sitting out. I rinse my mouth quickly; nothing kills a moment like nasty breath, right? I walk quietly back into the bedroom. Yea, he's awake! I hope I didn't do that. He's smiling though and that's always a good sign.

"You're awake? I hope I didn't do that when I flushed the toilet." I apologize, climbing into the massive bed. He's a good looking man, even first thing in the morning! It's so unfair, Peeta was like that too.

"No, I woke up before you were done." He explains turning his oh so gorgeous body towards me.

I kneel up next to him and ask, "Is there anything I should do before we eat breakfast?"

He has a wicked sexy smile on his face and says to me, "Eager, are we, Miss Everdeen?"

Oh! Holy crap, I really wasn't thinking about sex, though I like that thought. "Well, no, actually, I thought you were going to make me work or something. Though I guess that would definitely be considered a work out, wouldn't it?"

He surprises me when he grabs me by the waist and pulls me on top of him. I try to push away, giggling like a stupid little girl the whole time but when he grabs my wrists and kisses me, I can't help the moan that escapes from my mouth. Now, I'm really glad I used the mouthwash! He still has a hold of my wrists but when I tug on them, he lets them go and I place them on his shoulders. He's got broad shoulders, nice and firm and smooth. I really do like touching him. I can't help but slide my tongue against his bottom lip, so full and tasty.

Christian rolls us over so I'm underneath him and I immediately wrap my legs around his waist, feeling his morning erection against my stomach. I moan again and this time he slides his tongue into my mouth. He pulls back and we're breathing heavily, just looking into each other's matching set of grey eyes. I don't know if mine are as dark as his right now, but I wouldn't be surprised.

"What are you doing to me, Mockingjay?" He asks me before kissing my jaw and down the hidden fault line of my neck. I arch myself so he can have better access and feel the heat pooling in my stomach and between my legs.

I entangle my fingers in his hair. I haven't felt this good in such a long time. From the little bit that Johanna did tell me about him, it didn't seem like he was affectionate at all. It just seemed like it was sex, rough, kinky sex. I still don't know that we've done anything really kinky. Yeah he tied me up and he spanked me, but surely with all the equipment he has, there's a lot more I don't even know about. I am curious about those metal balls he showed me yesterday.

He stops kissing my neck and look into my eyes again. "Are you okay? Sore at all?"

My answer to him is pushing my crotch against his. His eyes close for a moment and when he opens them to look down at me; his eyes are a smoky grey. I pull his head back down to mine and kiss him deeply. He breaks it again to make a trail of kisses down my neck to my chest.

"Let's get rid of this." He kneels back so I can sit up and take the red shirt off. I'm about to lay back down but he pulls me onto his lap, my legs wrapped around him more securely. He looks at me like he has a question or is searching for something.

"What's wrong?" I ask because I need to know what's bothering him.

"Why did you sign up for this?" He finally asks, his hands on my waist. I can still feel his erection but I can also tell that's its softening just a bit.

I also feel too naked now. I drop my hands in our laps, looking at them. "Johanna told me so many of the men gave her morphling or alcohol and she could just block it all out."

He puts his fingers under my chin and raises it to look into my eyes. He genuinely looks like he cares when he asks, "What did you want to block out?"

I can feel the tears welling up in the corners of my eyes and I know he'll understand because of what he has said, if only a little, about his wife. "The pain of being alone."

He nods; he does understand and puts his lips to my forehead. The he leans his forehead against mine, "I know what you mean. I don't approve of drug use unless necessary though and I'm glad I was the first to claim you."

His choice of words makes me snort and I pull my head back to look at him. I wipe my eyes quickly. "Claim me? I think that everything that has happened in my life was meant to be."

"So, you believe in Fate?" He leans back, resting on his outstretched arms. I unwrap my legs so they are now just propped up against his sides.

"Sometimes, but sometimes, most of the times I'm told, my decisions are made up so quickly that I don't know if Fate really exists."

He nods again and runs one hand up my leg. "Did you really think drugs would make it better?"

I shrug. "I was just looking to get out from the everyday hurt. I know it would have only been temporary; I never much liked the feeling of not being able to control what happens to me."

He laughs, a wonderful sound followed with a beautiful smile, "I know what you mean by that too!"

I like how we've managed to change the topic. I don't know that I'm ready to let Christian see me really cry yet. I have cried so much over the last year, though the last few months were getting better. He surprises me again when he hugs me to him.

"I don't think I want you to get back on the list." He whispers to in my ear.

I can't help but pull back again, shocked. "What?"

He looks embarrassed, like he didn't mean to say it out loud. Except he did and he wasn't asleep where he wouldn't be able to help what comes out of his mouth. He looks down and then back up at me. What comes next is even more surprising and he says it in a rush. "I don't care about the contract. I just want to spend time with you. I've only ever been with one woman whose presence I enjoyed all the time, even when she upset me, and that was my wife. Every other woman was just that, another woman."

What do I say to that? I've known him for less then twenty-four hours! I know he can tell by the widening of my eyes that he's shocked me. Except, I want to spend time with him too. In a low voice I ask, "So, what does this mean?"