No one thought I would go there but because of good reviews I AM GOING TO WRITE ANOTHER BAR FIGHT. I will try my best, remember this is a sequel and half of the time they don't turn out as good as the original. REMEMBER READER DISCRETION ADVISDED!!
Okay Link, Ike, and Marth had gone to a bar for a little fun.
Marth: Last time we came with you link you started a fight, so this time we are watching you
Ike: Or else we will drop you faster then Roy failed the Brawl initiation test
Flashback
Roy: So all I got to do is hit above one thousand feet in the home run contest
Master Hand: Yeah
Roy: This will be so easy; hey can I use my sword on the sandbag instead of the bat
Master Hand: NO!!
Roy: Why this is a perfectly good sword
Master Hand: NO!! Use the Stupid Bat
Roy goes up to hit, but instead he throws the bat at Master Hand and uses his sword. He hits it so hard it gets chopped in half.
Master Hand: ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THOSE SAND BAG MEN COST.
Roy: So when do I pick up my own copy of the game
Master Hand Flicks Roy off of Final Destination.
End Flashback
Link: Don't worry I will only have White Russian
Seven white russians later
Snake: Chug, Chug, Chug, Chug!
Link and Warrio were engaged in a drinking contest, only thing they were drinking entire kegs not cups. With a little help from Zero Suit Samus Link did a keg stand and won.
Link: Thanks for the help man
Samus: I am not even wearing the suit idiot
Link: You the Man
Samus punches him in the face
Warrio: Ho did I lose, I never lose. You cheated
Link: You wana mess
Warrio: So pop then
Karl comes out of nowhere and slaps them.
Karl: NEVER TRY TO ACT LIKE YOU TWO HAVE REAL STREET CRED. AND NEVER SAY THOSE WORDS AGAIN, THEY BELONG TO MY FRIENDS AND ME, WE TRADEMARKED THEM!
Link: So we are going to have a stock battle
Warrio: I want a coin battle
Link No one plays coin battle
Warrio: Well I am fat and ugly so the only way I can get a girl is with money, so I need coin
Mrs. Pac Man walks into the bar
Mrs. Pac Man: That is so true Warrio baby.
Marth: I thought you were with Pac Man
Mrs. Pac Man: I am Mrs. Pac Man not Miss we were never together
Marth: Okay?
Link: We are going to fight at Luigi's mansion. Lets go!!
Link just stands there holding up his sword
Warrio: What are you doing
Link: Waiting for us to get magically transported
Warrio: LOSER, WE CANT DO THAT WITH OUT MASTER HAND.
Link: Well your stupid
Warrio: SHUT UP!!
Warrio punches link so far that he flies through teen walls. Mr. Game and Watch holds up a sign next to link that says 10
Warrio: New record, 10 walls
Pac man: No fair mine was only nine walls
Kirby: Wahoo I beat Pacman in a bet and won ten bucks.
Pac man: Fine here's ten bucks.
You know that was the first time I started a chapter with out any of our bandicoot heroes. Wait here come our three favorite mercenaries right now. Dan, Ean, and Karl walked in and sat on a barstool.
Eddie the Bartender: Hey boys what can I do you for
Ean: BEER
Dan: BEER
Karl: SCOTCH
Ean and Dan: What!!
Karl: Well you guys as you know I could be a father any day. So tonight is the last night I will be a wingman. So might as well have as much fun as I can.
Karl drinks the shot, then drinks another.
Karl: Party time.
He walks over to Gannondorf
Karl: You know Gannondorf, Link always beats you, why don't you quit the evil villain job and become a bouncer at one of those nightclubs.
Gannondorf: I tried that already and it didn't work to well
Flashback
Gannondorf is wearing a black tuxedo with glasses, and he is standing in front of the hottest nightclub in the city.
Earl Finkle: HI I'm Earl Finkle
Gannondorf: Your not on the list
Earl: Impossible, I'm going in! These tickets cost me two weeks allowance
Gannondorf: NO ONE GETS IN WITHOUT BEING ON THE LIST
He turns into Gannon and throws him across town.
End Flashback
Gannondorf: It turns out after all that he really was on the list. I JUST FORGOT MY PRESCRIPTION SUN GLASSES
The two had a jolly drunken laugh.
Karl: Hey there is Link go get him big guy.
Gannondorf goes after link and starts a fight with him.
Dan: You know you just started a fight.
Karl: Yeah!
Ean: You drunken dirt bag.
Link comes up behind Karl and kicks him and he lands behind the counter. He was knocked out.
Link: Thanks a lot, Gannondorf chopped my hat in half.
Karl lands behind the counter. Then Fox walks in with two bazookas.
Fox: Which one of you dirt bags sent me that bill for the hotel.
Everyone points at Dan and Ean. Ean looks around and points at Dan. Dan looks around and points at Ean. They jump out of the way just as Fox shoots missiles at them. They take cover behind the counter.
Ean: Karl get up! We could use a little wingman right now.
Dan: It's not working
They look at the bottle of scotch on the shelf.
Ean: How about a lot of wingman
They pour the whole bottle down his throat
Dan: Dink up rich shit. I mean c'mon who gets drunk only by scotch and not hard wiskey.
Ean: Look out he is gona blow!
Karl: YAHHHOOOO
He then gets up and stands on the counter. When Fox tries to shoot Karl he spins and sends the missile back at fox.
Fox: Oww!
Karl then goes on a rampage and attacks people at random.
Meanwhile.
Warrio: I' am the master. Who wants to take me on.
Mario and Luigi: We will
Warrio: Two on one, that is not fair
Waluigi: No problem brother.
Waluigi walked into the bar with his tennis racquet.
Warrio: All right now it's a party
They begin fighting
Luigi: Waluigi you are stupid. I mean you attack with a tennis racquet.
Waluigi: You will pay for that.
He pushes Luigi on a table.
Waluigi: It is fresh man Friday all over again.
He whacks Luigi in the butt five times. Luigi remembers that fateful day.
Flashback
Luigi: Wow I cant believe that we a finally in Mushroom High Mario… Mario?
He sees Mario run away and hide in a dumpster
Luigi: Mario where are you going.
He turns around to see Waluigi with a paddle
Waluigi: FRESH MEAT
Luigi: Mama Mia!
And since that day Luigi's hated Waluigi and could never sit right on a chair.
End flash back
Luigi: I WILL MAKE YOU PAY.
He shoots fire flowers at Waluigi until he is burned to a crisp
Meanwhile Warrio and Mario are still fighting. Warrio farts but Mario was wearing a gas mask.
Mario: Bye-bye
He then blasted Warrio with the Mario Finale and Warrio flew out the bar like a shooting star.
Mario: Another win for Mario Bros.
Luigi: You mean Luigi Bros.
Mario: Mario Bros!
Luigi: Luigi Bros!
Mario: MARIO BROS.
Luigi: LUIGI BROS
They then plunge into a fistfight. Mario pulls out a mega mushroom.
Mario: Well I will just have to step on you again.
Karl runs up and grabs it.
Karl: Oh no it's my turn now.
He is about to eat it but then a cat comes up and eats it. The Cat then becomes Forty feet tall.
Karl: RUN IT'S SUPER KITTY.
It then shoots fire out of it's mouth.
Luigi: I should have never given him those fire flowers
Karl: I know! I will stop it with Alchemy!
He then draws a circle on the ground with a star on it. It lights up gold and super kitty turns to normal.
Karl: OH NO I DID IT WRONG AND LOST MY RIGHT LEG AND LEFT ARM. THEY WILL HAVE TO PUT IN SOME METAL DEVICES.
Edward and Alphonse show up in front of him.
Edward: Why does everyone have to copy our show?
Karl: It was ether your show or Dragon Ball Z, and there name sounds gay. I mean Ball Z, just say it three times fast and well. Anyway the show is cool but some writer Named Super Sayan Crash has already made a dragon ball and crash bandicoot cross over and I wnated to spoof all over anime shows. So why not start here.
Alphonse: You are ether drunk or retarded.
Karl: AND YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A STUPID SOUL IN METAL.
Alphonse kicks Karl into another room of the bar. He wakes up with everything intact.
Karl: I am not going to ask how I got these back.
Benjamin: Hey karl over here
Karl: What is it uncle
Benjamin: Follow me
He jumps in a magic well Karl then follows. They reappear in some kind of Japanese anime world.
Karl: Hey I'm anime.
He follows Benjamin to a house and up into one of the rooms. He opens up a drawer and pulls out, well some thing pink and frilly.
Karl: LADIES UNDERWEAR
Benjamin: YEAH
Karl walks into the bathroom and when he opens the shower and sees Kagome in the tub. She screams at the sign of him. This makes Karl scream. Inynasha comes into the bathroom and then he starts screaming.
Kagome: Sit boy
Karl and Inynasha both slam their heads on the floor.
Karl and Inynasha: The Pain!!
Karl: So what's up dog boy?
Inynasha: Great you are the last person I want to see right now. Anyway things aren't so bad.
Karl: That's good to hear. Any good fights lately
Inynasha: Well there was this huge demon.
Karl: So did you take him out.
Inynasha: Yeah no problem
Kagome: Sorry to interrupt but CAN YOU GO NOW.
Karl: Why I'm enjoying the view aren't you Inynasha
He slaps karl on in the face
Inynasha: ( Still this isn't so bad)
Karl: Yes it is not a bad view
Inynasha: MIND READING FREAK
He once again slapped Karl in the face
Kagome: GO NOWWW
Karl: Quick cover your ears and run
Inynasha: Why
Kagome: SIT
Inynasha slammed his head on the floor.
Karl: That's why
They both run out of the door and as they run they noticed that Kagome had put on her clothes and was shooting arrows at them. They run to the well where they find Benjamin: Trying to stuff down a big ball of underwear down the well.
Karl: You pervert
Inynasha: That is just wrong
Benjamin: What?
They ditch the underwear and jump in the well. They reappear at the bar.
Ean : KARL HELP
Karl: What is it
Ean: Luigi brought a bag of little white stars, and then he shoved it up his nose. He is running around punching peo….owww
Luigi hit Ean in the family jewels.
Karl: There is only one way to stop a crazy person. ITS BONKING TIME!!
He pulls out a two by four from nowhere and starts hitting Luigi.
Karl: I love the bonking. Three, four, five, six, seven, cant remember the rest.
Ean: I think he is dead.
Luigi: I'm okay
Karl: TWELVE!!
He hit Luigi so hard that Ean was also hit to.
Ean: That is the last time I ask you for help.
Dan: Hey guys look what I got.
He starts juggling plasma grenades and hands Ean five of they then activate all of them. The three of them run out of the Bar as It blows up behind them creating a giant fire ball. Everyone inside was flung back to his or her own worlds.
Karl: Can you guys go one day with out blowing shit up!
Ean: What do you mean?
Dan: Well the bar, the hotel, Karl's car.
Karl: WHAT?
Dan: Nothing you car won't comeback for the next three to five days.
Ean: We sent the bill to fox and that is where the bar bill is going.
The End
Fox: No another bill!
He looks at it then walks out the room. Hold on there is a Knock at my door. I got to get it
Kincin The Great: Hey Fox what's up
Fox: You're Dead
Can't type he broke fingers will write when out of hospital.
