A/N: just one scene in this one. thank you for reading and your reviews.
Chapter 4
Strangers & Lovers
"It's always been you, Rach." – Ross Gellar, Friends 2.08
"Rachel?"
The voice wasn't ten feet away. But it was a distinct, delicate whisper that Rachel knew. She turned around to see the shocked but beautiful Quinn Fabray standing in the doorway.
"Quinn?"
Quinn just stared, feeling her heart swell at the brunette before her, feeling her breathing shorten. Rachel looked perfect, dressed in navy blue with her glinting hair flowing flawlessly to her shoulders, reflecting the rays of moonlight through the picture window.
Rachel dropped her bag and ran to Quinn, engulfing her with the hardest hug one could get from a five foot two girl. The stunned blonde heard and felt the tears that came with the tight embrace.
"I've missed you," Rachel murmured through her sobs.
"I've missed you too," Quinn spoke after a few seconds of feeling Rachel's small body against her. She softly slipped her arms around Rachel, trying not to shed her own tears.
The two reunited girls stood there, holding on close to each other, only Rachel's sobs permeating the silence.
"I'm so sorry, Quinn."
Rachel's voice was a barely audible whisper. They let go, still focused on each other, Rachel's apologetic eyes gazing into Quinn's searching hazels.
Quinn didn't know what to say as she stared at Rachel, an onslaught of feelings charging within her. Five years ago, Rachel had left her hanging…
"Rachel…"
"No, Quinn, let me talk," Rachel interrupted, dabbing her eyes. "I have this speech," she confessed, giving a small laugh.
Quinn relaxed her body a little, but anxiety and hope still ran haywire in her fatigued mind.
"I– I made the worst decision of my life five years ago," Rachel started.
The ambiguity of the statement startled the fragile hope Quinn was holding onto. Did Rachel mean running out completely? Or not choosing to be with her?
"You were my best friend and you… I was scared. When you told me everything, I was scared because… because I believed I found true love once. And when it failed and broke my heart, you came with me and showed me what I perceived to be an even true– truer love."
Quinn's heart jumped.
"And you had been standing by me through everything and didn't know if I could be… be…"
"What… what are you saying, Rachel?"
Rachel's eyes darted, tentative. Quinn's heart beat faster.
"That afternoon, the moment I looked in your eyes, it felt real. Like I could trust you forever, love you forever… I was scared, Quinn. And I am so so sorry because you gave me… gave me your heart and I couldn't… couldn't…"
Quinn took Rachel's hand gently, guiding her sideways to the bed. They both sat, facing each other on the edge. Quinn rested Rachel's hand between them on the bed, stroking it.
"I was scared, Quinn. I didn't know what to do," Rachel finished, hanging her head.
Quinn was silent. The nerves of anxiety and hope calmly rested in her head now, urging her to say something.
"And now you are Quinn Fabray, rich, married, successful lawyer," Rachel added, a little hopelessly.
"Rachel, I was– I'm never anything without you."
Rachel perked up, finding Quinn's yearning expression.
"But you– you made it. Five years. In New York."
Quinn laughed, shaking her head.
"That is … nothing," she said, brushing the compliment aside. "I threw myself into work after… after. After you. After you left, I– I was never happy," she confessed, feeling her walls come down. "I graduated early and then went into law school because I didn't know what to do."
Quinn just continued staring at Rachel faithfully.
"I never stopped loving you."
Her hand squeezed Rachel's. Unforgotten memories and long nights of infinite wonder flashed in Quinn's vision.
"Not for a single moment during these five years."
Silence permeated the room as the words floated softly between them. Hope slowly rose through the air, and then conflict appeared in Rachel's eyes.
"But you're married."
Quinn half-snorted. "Biggest mistake of my life, that was."
"You don't love him?"
Rachel stared back, her heart willing– wanting to be taken. Quinn took a graceful breath, earnestly watching her.
"Not even a fraction of how much I – still – love you."
And they sat there, gazing at each other as darkness befell the room.
"Rachel?"
"Hm?"
Quinn looked at Rachel, feeling the aura of the same girl she knew five years ago sit before her. At the same time, she didn't know this twenty-five year old Rachel that had showed up in her room tonight.
"Do you love me?"
She pleadingly looked at Rachel, holding her hand with both of her own.
There's nothing stopping us.
"Quinn."
"Rachel?" she whispered back.
Rachel's eyes shot up determinedly to Quinn.
"I – I slept with him."
Quinn raised her eyebrows, her sitting form unmoving. "You slept with him?"
"John." Her voice was just above a whisper.
"My– husband John?" Quinn's voice was a whisper.
Rachel stared back, her head afraid to nod. Instead, her pupils gradually rose up and down for her.
Quinn absorbed the information, turning away from Rachel. Her hands sat in her lap, a reaction unapparent.
"I should go," Rachel muttered quietly.
She rose from the bed, glancing at the silent Quinn.
"I'm sor–" but Quinn was frozen, her eyes not following Rachel to the door. "I…"
Rachel disappeared through the door without finishing the word.
Above Quinn's bed, an analog clock with gold-colored hands posted pointed at the two and six. She turned back around and collapsed in her bed, tears slipping from her eyes onto the sheets.
She cried, thinking about how perfect her life was, but how it wasn't.
She cried, bleakly imagining a grey life, stuck in a loveless marriage.
She cried, fathoming how she might never be with her true love.
She cried, and caught a whiff of strawberry scent residing on her sheets.
Rachel.
She pressed herself harder against the sheets, trying to drown herself in the fading fragrance. Distant memories of happiness swam in her mind, and the nostalgia of the halls of McKinley High floated back to her.
Then she thought about how her unloving husband got to be with Rachel first and she cried again.
The last time she had cried this hard was five years ago.
"Quinn?"
The inquiring male voice sounded peaceful and worried. She continued to sob into the sheets, pretending not to hear him.
"Quinn, what happened?"
The sobbing gradually subsided as her hands slowly clutched the sheets tightly. She got up and looked at him piercingly.
"You happened, John," she shot.
He stepped back at the deathly, icy tone that made him prefer to be shouted at.
"I can't believe you. And don't even pretend."
His mind quickly connected the dots; Rachel was angry after they slept together when she found out he was married to Quinn, now Quinn was crying after seeing Rachel…
"Were you two ex-lovers? I swear I didn't know…"
"Oh my god, you are pathetic. I can't believe I might've liked you at some point."
"Might have?"
Quinn almost sneered.
"You're right. I never liked you. I just used you to stop thinking about her."
She didn't feel any remorse from crushing him with that verbal blow. It made her feel good.
"Rachel? So you are ex-lovers…"
"Yes, Rachel! And of course you had to sleep with her, like you slept with my roommate in law school. You just can't keep your hands off my friends, can't you?"
John shifted his feet uncomfortably.
"You forgave me for that."
"And then I fucking married you."
God, what is my life.
John was silent, feeling the air of finality.
Quinn grabbed her purse and strode right past him, out the bedroom door and down the stairs.
"Where are you going?"
Quinn wiped her eyes clear of tears.
"After her."