A/N: Ok, I'm trying a bit of a new layout since I'm going to be having a lot to say in the next chapters...

Announcements: What is with this new layout? I can't count the number of times I was reading and the new little bar at the top confused me. And just what the hell is image manager, I mean really?

With that said, if this chapter sucks, I apologize. I'm going through rp withdraw (because I'm a writing rp dork), and it's hindering my writing (it's all linked somehow, I promise). That also said, POLL POLL POLL! I forgot last chapter to put this, but please, for the love of God, vote in the poll!

Oh, summary change...yay or nay? Since the one good thing about the layout change is the more space to summarize, I decided to experiment since I suck at summarizing things anyways. So, good or bad?

Characters: Aella (L. sohma cullen), Briony (UnderTheWeepingWillow), Jacqueline (AnnieHonson), Annabeth (EmilyLupin77), Emmeline (emilian1398), Minnie (ukrainianelfhorse), (mentions: Azrael (Dreams of the Darkness), Ashton and Ian (AnnieHonson))

Song: "No Light, No Light" by the ever fabulous Florence+The Machine

Disclaimer: Unless it's JC, Skylar, Katie, or an unrecognized animal belonging to them, I don't own a part of it.

Isle of Skye

JC's POV

"You, my dear, are an absolute idiot!" That was Quinn, telling me what I already knew.

After watching my darkest and most feared secret be revealed and blow up in my face, I took Darius's advice and did what I told Queen Sgiach I would do, which was explore the outer grounds of the school. I met Quinn along the way, who instantly demanded what happened after I shot out of my room, and I had to explain everything. That got us to our current position of walking out of the castle and Quinn calling me an idiot.

"Yes, I have realized this," I grunted and rubbed at my face, trying my hardest to not freak out, "Goddess, this was the absolute last thing I wanted to happen. I mean, I was going to tell them eventually, but not like this. This was too abrupt, too shocking and I'm sure my trust points with them just plummeted! Quinn, I just…ugh!" Feeling their stares on me after I had to admit to having a Dark side, feeling the emotions coming off of Zoey and Stark, the shock, the fear, and most importantly, the hurt was enough to nearly throw me overboard. I didn't tell them at Tulsa for fear of losing them (among many other things including still being confused myself), I was afraid they'd be afraid and lose all trust in me…and now I might very well have lost them anyway. Way to go, JC. Way. To. Go.

"Hey, hey, chill out," she muttered and brushed against my leg, "it's better that it's out now than waiting. It wasn't the ideal way to do it, no, and you probably should have told them sooner, but at least it's out in the open now. Rephaim seemed to understand what you were getting at, so he quite possibly understands what you're going through, and Sgiach can help you too. As for the trust, yeah, I'm not gonna lie, you probably did. But if anyone truly believes that you will just spontaneously turn to Darkness, then they are absolute morons who don't know you well."

"Yeah…but Quinn, you didn't see Zoey's face or feel what-"

"If you give her some time to cool off and explain to her rationally why you did what you did without being on the verge of tears, then she'll understand," she cut me off, "it's not like she's never kept secrets."

I sighed and let her words sink in. My dog, as usual, was very right. As we walked along the pathway surrounded by flora that I probably couldn't think up in my wildest dreams, I let myself relax just a bit and smiled at her. "Why do you always have to be rational?" I asked.

"I'm not always, I'm just rational when you need to be," Quinn laughed, "we're always the opposite of the other, remember? It's why we work so well."

I chuckled at the truth and nodded. We were always the opposite in our emotions and always kept the other calm. I let us fall back into a silence as I began to actually look around the area again. It was still a bit of a shock to be here for real. I'd always dreamed of coming here (or relatively close to here, hell they were all similar), it was hard to believe that the dream was actually true now. Granted, being here because of Neferet and Darkness dampened the mood some. And Darkness was the reason I was out here now and…ugh…I just love how my mind goes full circle. I hate this so much.

"C'mon, you need a stress reliever," Quinn spoke up, probably seeing and knowing the wheels that were going in my mind, "we're not far from the stables, I can smell the horses."

I laughed quietly to appease her and nodded, "always knowing what I need, lead the way my friend."

I followed her down and around a cobblestone path, taking in just about everything I could along the way. Giant trees were scattered every which way until they gathered into a woodsy type thing behind us, flowers of every size, shape, and color dotted the area, the occasional rodent or bird would pass by, and I think I heard a stream somewhere in the woods behind us. It really was very relaxing and peaceful, I just had to remind myself repeatedly to not overthink it (which is rather paradoxical when you think about it).

The stable building was a large, ancient looking building made out of stone, so it stood pretty sturdy to the weather and time. Walking in, it was much larger than the stables at Tulsa (not that that really surprised me) that was filled with mostly Highland Ponies (again, not really all that surprising being in Scotland and all). The smell of hay and horse and the sounds of soft whinnies and hooves hitting the ground hit me like a wave and I instantly felt better. Hey, I'm a country girl, animals probably comfort me better than people do.

As Quinn and I walked along the rows of stalls, most of the horses ignored us while they ate or drank, a few were not in their stalls at all, probably out grazing or something. It was probably midway through when a gelding noticed us and caught our attention.

"You're new here, I haven't seen you around before."

I turned to look at the black gelding, his head hanging over the stall door, and smiled. "That I am, a group of us just flew in here last night," I explained and walked over, leaning against the door next to him, "the name's JC."

He seemed a bit surprised, probably by the fact that I could actually understand him, but he shook it off pretty quickly. "Caden," he responded, "are you by chance taking this class?"

"I certainly hope so, but I haven't gotten a schedule yet, so I don't know," I answered with a weak shrug.

"Oh," Caden said, "well, if you do take it and this hour, do you think you could do me a favor and request to ride me?"

That was a bit of an odd request, but I shrugged again and nodded anyway, "you don't get out this hour I'll take it?"

"No, I do actually," he answered and shook his mane with a snort, "but my rider this hour is a total idiot who doesn't know the first thing about horse riding, anyone would be better than him!"

"Ah, well, how do you know I'd be better than him?" I asked.

"You're talking to me aren't you? For a vampyre, that is rather uncommon and enough proof."

I laughed as did Quinn and I nodded, "ok, fair point. I guess if I'm in this class, I'll see what I can do. No promises though."

"For your sake and for mine, I do hope you are talking to the horse." Startled, I jumped and whirled around to see three people standing behind me. The guy who spoke was one of the ones from my encounter in the infirmary, either Skylar or Pace (after Switch led me to my room, I knew and could pick out who he was), one of the girls was Katie, and the other was her friend whose name I did not remember.

"And there's the idiot now," Caden grumbled and I bit my lip for a moment to keep from smirking.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize there was a class still going on!" I apologized quickly, "and yeah, I was, which yes, I know sounds totally weird and all, but I was and…just let me get out of your way," I finally decided to say and stepped out of the way of the stall. I was so smooth when surprised, let me tell you.

"Not a problem Infirmary Girl, sixth hour is practically over, we were just putting some stuff away and coming back to leave," he explained.

"Infirmary Girl, really?" I asked with a smirk, deciding to brush off how idiotic I probably just sounded. That could be pretty common occurrence, "well, seeing as though you're just as bad at names as I am, JC Redbird. I really only remember Katie, sorry."

"You met my best friend, Aella," Katie said and then looped her arm through his, "and my boyfriend Skylar." Ah, and the girl lays claim, I never did quite understand that. Because very obviously I'm attempting to think of a way to steal some dude I've talked to for a combined 5 minutes from you…though I do admit he was hot (and I'm partial to blondes), most fledglings were.

"Well, nice to re-meet you both," I said and was cut off from the bell ringing to signal the end of the day. Damn that thing was still loud!

"That's the bell, c'mon Skylar, we should probably get an early dinner. A, would you mind checking on Jazz's stall? Thanks," Katie said quickly and was off with Skylar, leaving Aella and I standing there in a bit of confusion.

"That was a very skillful ditch if I do say so myself," Quinn commented.

"So um…do you want me to check the stall with you?" I asked awkwardly. Seriously, the abrupt leaving was a bit strange and left us in a less than desirable situation.

"I watched Katie lock Jazz in her stall, she just wants to be alone with Skylar because they have some type of plans tonight, I'm not really even sure what. I can't say I really blame them, though. I'll walk out with you," Aella shrugged and we started walking out. "So…do you like it here so far? I mean, I know you've only been here for a day, but…" she trailed off in her attempt to start conversation.

I shrugged my good shoulder, "I haven't seen a whole hell of a lot of this place, but it's beautiful. This has always been a dream of mine to come here, I just wish it was under better circumstances."

She eyed me, looking at my wrapped hand and the bandages sticking out from my shirt, "are things in Tulsa really as bad as some are saying?"

"It depends on what you're reading/hearing," I sighed, "honestly, the majority of the media outlets are downplaying it majorly, which is one of the reason we're having so many problems. One of the many, many reasons we're having problem."

"Well, I still think you're all really brave for what you're doing there, it obviously isn't easy."

"Really brave or really stupid," I commented wryly and smirked, flashing on the conversation I had with Erik, "but thank you. We'll do whatever is needed in service of the Goddess. Anyway, where are you coming from?" I asked, really not wanting to stay on that topic too long. With the way my mind worked, conversations like that potentially led to dangerous thoughts. Or more, with the thoughts my mind was focused on now, it led to dangerous thoughts.

"The three of us, me, Katie, and Skylar all came from Detroit," she answered.

I smirked, "a bunch of city-slickers eh?" I teased, "that's cool. Why'd you all come out here, if you don't mind my asking?"

"Skylar came out here to have more training, he's a really skilled swordsman, has an affinity for it and all, and what better way to train and get better than under the Queen of Warriors herself? Katie just followed suit because they're together, and I…needed a change of scenery mostly," Aella answered, and though the part about her intrigued me, I had a feeling pushing the matter would not end well. I had no reason to intrude anyway.

"Fair enough," I said and sighed, looking up at the night sky. It was getting late, or early was more like it, and I still had a few things to do, the top priority was talking to Zoey, who I hadn't seen or really even felt from since the mishap. I dreaded how that was going to go. Sighing again, I looked around to find we were close to the castle and stopped dead in my tracks. I wasn't ready just yet, I had just finally calmed down and I still had no clue what I was going to say. Yeah, I was delaying the inevitable and that wouldn't really help, but I just didn't want to talk about it yet. "Well, this seems to be your stop. Have fun at dinner, I hope they're serving something good," I commented after a moment longer of thought.

"Aren't you coming to eat dinner?" she asked, clearly confused.

"I will, just not right now, I'm not really hungry…and I haven't finished exploring yet," I gave as an answer. It wasn't an entire lie since both of those were true too, but not the real reason. "It was nice talking to you though, Aella, maybe we'll have some classes together or something," I added and smiled a bit.

"You can call me A. Nice talking to you too JC, and maybe," she agreed with a small, but confused smile and we split, her going back into the castle and me going…somewhere on the isle. I probably just left that girl in total confusion and probably seemed a little strange to her, but oh well. It was a small price to pay to procrastination.

"She seemed nice," Quinn said, reminding me she was still following me. I nodded in agreement but didn't say anything, really focusing on where we were going and how to get back without getting lost. I really did need to start memorizing the layout anyway.

Within 15 minutes, I found myself on a grassy hill overlooking the beach and ocean surrounding the isle, along with parts of the more woodsy areas. Deciding it was a good spot, I sat down and leaned on my arms behind me only to have pain shoot down my shoulder. Sighing, I shifted to sit cross-legged and stared out at the scenery before me. Like the rest of the isle, it was calm and peaceful and beautiful. On top of that, I was feeling relaxed as I felt rather close to Spirit. I wasn't quite sure why, but I figured it was just the isle itself, and hell, I'd take all the calming feelings I could get, so I wouldn't complain. Point was, if I could just stay there forever, I'd be a happy JC.

"So, did you figure out what you are going to tell Zo?" Quinn asked, dragging me back to reality.

"The truth is really the only thing I can tell her," I answered quietly, feeling like that was the right answer. I hadn't given it too much thought, but what else could I really say to her? She already knew most of the truth anyway. "With both of us being more rational, it should go better."

"You hope," she added.

"Don't make me doubt this anymore than I am," I warned. I knew I had to talk to her, but that didn't make it any easier or make me want to do it any more. What I really wanted to do was rewind time and make it never happen, but that obviously wasn't possible. My next option after that was to curl into a ball, cry, and live as a hermit for the rest of my life. Who would want to associate with me after learning of my Dark side? "I'm a disgrace," I muttered unintentionally. My filter between my thoughts and my mouth apparently decided to take a break.

"You're being self-pitying," she retorted, "you aren't a disgrace. This isn't your fault, you made a choice you didn't understand when you were seven and it's going to follow you for the rest of your life. But you've stood strong against it and haven't done anything to harm another person and you never will. It doesn't make you a bad person that you have this other side of you, it makes you a good person for fighting it so well."

I looked at my dog for a moment, letting her words sink in. "How can you be so sure of this?" I asked.

"Because I know you JC, I know all of you and I know the real you," Quinn promised and laid her head in my lap.

I sighed yet again and gently started massaging one of her ears, letting my thoughts get away from me. I was scared as all fuck of the other side of me, whether I'd let it show or not. I knew the Dark me, I knew what she was capable of doing, both to me and to others…and that was scary and depressing. That was the disgraceful part and why I was so ashamed and scared. I could very easily be turned into a destructive, uncaring, killing machine. But at the same time, Quinn was right. I had fought her off for quite a while, and even now, she had yet to gain the upper hand over me. Of course, that could always change with Neferet and Kalona, especially now that they knew about the accident, but it didn't have to either. It depended on me and the ones around me…which led to the fact that the others around me needed to know and have it explained and still maintain their trust in me. The only question was how to do that.

"You're in my spot." The voice startled me back to reality and I turned to see who it came from. A red fledgling with long, black hair in a braid and wearing a snug black tank top and skinny jeans (with a lot of jewelry might I add) was standing behind me, a flute in hand. She didn't make eye contact and her hair obscured my view, but I could tell her eyes were an odd shade of violet and she had rather prominent features. Frankly, she looked kind of like Zoey and I wondered if she had some Native American in her. A black cat with silver eyes stood by her side, seemingly glaring at me and Quinn.

"Um…sorry," I muttered and moved to get up, "I'll just be going then…I didn't realize I was in the way of something." How many times had I embarrassed myself or made a mess today?

"N-no, you can stay," she said after a moment and walked over, carefully sitting down beside me. The cat jumped into her lap and continued her stare down at us. "I just…I just didn't know anyone else knew of this place."

I looked around the area and realized it was kind of secluded. Huh. "If it's any consolation, I wandered her accidentally," I said, "and I won't tell if you won't."

"I never intended to," she responded. I guess the common phrase went unnoticed? I waved it off and we sat in an uncomfortable silence, me looking between her and the ocean, and her eyes focused on her fiddling hands in her lap.

"So, you play?" I asked finally to break the silence and pointed at the flute. Ok, it was a stupid question, because why else would she be carrying the instrument around? But it broke the silence.

She nodded and picked up the flute, examining it. "That's cool, I play too."

She looked up at me, still not directly making eye contact but closer to it. "Is that all you play?" she asked.

"No, I actually started on the clarinet, and it will forever be my favorite, but the flute's fun. I play piano, guitar, and sax too, and sing…I'm not exceptionally good at all of them but hey, it's fun," I shrugged and chuckled a bit, "I've always been called a music geek for it, but I guess if that's the worst of it then I can take it."

She smiled a little bit, "I can understand that."

"I'm JC by the way," I added, realizing neither of us had done such formalities.

"Briony," she said and continued to examine the flute, pressing different keys.

"Would you mind playing?" It was worth a shot.

"W-what?" Briony looked up again, a bit surprised.

"I assume that's what you brought it out here to do," I answered and shrugged, "you could still do that. I need a bit of a distraction anyway."

She seemed hesitant and to debate it, but nodded, "s-sure, why not?" She brought the instrument to her mouth and started playing; I looked at her in surprise as the melody started. She was good, really good. I mean, it wasn't that I thought she wouldn't be, but wow. I refocused my eyes on the ocean and focused on the sad flute melody lilting around me, to the point that it took me a moment to realize when she finally finished.

"You're really good, amazingly so," I told her when she was done.

She shrugged, "I have an affinity for it." I nodded in response. "It's getting kind of late," Briony announced, glancing at the sky, "I haven't eaten dinner yet either, so I should probably be going back in."

"I haven't either actually," I said and got up with her, "would you mind if I came with you? I'm still hopelessly new around here."

She shook her head and we set off back to the castle in a rather surprisingly, calm silence. Quinn and I followed her through the castle since she seemed to know where she was going (and I still didn't have a clue) to the dining hall. It was pretty empty, with only a few fledglings still around…and none of those fledglings were ones that I really needed to talk to. Quickly, I ran a check of Zoey with my bond and discovered she'd already eaten. Still, I did need to eat and Briony didn't seem to have any problem with me, so I followed her through the line, grabbing a piece of chicken and other food along the way, and sat down at a table with her and a few other girls.

"So Briony, who's your new friend here?" the blonde with blue eyes and rather heavy eye makeup asked.

"JC," I answered for myself and looked at her, then the other black haired girl (also wearing a braid) who had her nose buried in a book on the table, the curly haired girl who seemed to be attempting to analyze me, and the red fledgling with auburn hair.

"So you're the Spirit one," the blonde continued with a strange smile, "nice to finally meet you. I'm Jacqueline, you'll probably be seeing me a lot."

"O-k," I said warily and went back to looking at everyone else, "what about the rest of you?"

"I'm Annabeth," curly hair told me, "you came in with the other group from Tulsa, right?"

"Yup," I nodded.

"Emmeline," the red fledgling added and nudged the girl buried in the book next to her.

"Oh, hi!" she exclaimed and grinned at me, "I'm Midnight, but saying Minnie is so much easier. Welcome to the Isle of Skye!"

"Um, thanks," I responded and smiled. The table went silent again and I started digging into my dinner. It wasn't the most attractive sight, but I didn't realize that I hadn't eaten since yesterday and just how hungry that made me until I started eating. As I ate, I looked around the room and noticed that really only one other table was full, and I was curious to know who else was here. "So, can anyone tell me about the rest of the players in this room?" I asked.

"Oh, you mean that table?" Jacqueline asked and pointed back there, a bit of a grimace on her face, "that's the jock crowd and other, random popular kids. The muscular, black haired vamp Warrior is Azrael, he just turned. The long haired blonde next to him is my brother," she paused and grunted, "Ashton. And the third boy over there, the brunette is Ian. The brunette and blonde girls are Aella and Jackie respectively, the sidekicks to Queen Katie, who seems to be missing, along with Skylar," she explained and then paused again, looking past my shoulder. "As for that group, they're new, don't know much about them."

I looked back to find the group that I'd been needing to talk to and sighed, feeling my stomach drop at the fact that I could no longer avoid this. It was now or never, at least I wasn't hungry anymore. "I do know them though, thanks for letting me sit here and eat, I know it wasn't for a long time, but it was nice talking with you, albeit briefly. Now though, there's something I have to do, so if you'll excuse me," I announced and stood up, carrying my half eaten dinner to the garbage and throwing it out.

Quickly, I went over to them and locked eyes with my cousin. "We need to talk," I said and she nodded, her and Stark turning around to walk back out.

"We need to talk alone," I reiterated, looking at Stark.

Zo and him seemed to have a bit of a stare down before he nodded and backed off, allowing me to follow Zoey out of the dining hall and then out of the castle.

Zoey's POV

I know that I should have concentrated on classes today with it being our first day on Skye and all, but after everything that happened, I just couldn't. After the whole vision incident and JC admitting to what she did, my head was swirling. I was mad at her for keeping the secret, but at the same time I felt guilty for my outburst and I felt bad for her. I couldn't imagine what she felt going through it. I just didn't know what to do or feel about any of this, and for some reason I think she felt the same.

We needed to talk again, both of us in a bit more rational state, and we both knew it. That didn't make the thought any less awkward or any more ideal, but it had to be done. I went through all of sixth hour and dinner thinking about that and what I was going to say to her and what she would say to me that the entire end of the day was a blur. Seriously, I remembered none of it.

I wasn't quite sure why we went back to the dining hall after we already ate (something about Shaunee leaving her purse there or something), but it was kind of good we did since JC was there and we agreed to talk. And after convincing Stark I'd be alright and if anything went wrong, she would still protect me, I led her out of the castle and to the beach in silence, other than for her to mumble to Quinn to leave.

"So, are you going to explain why?" I asked, breaking the silence as we walked along the beach. I guess it would have to be me who did it, she didn't know what I wanted to know. Well, she might…but she obviously wasn't talking first.

She smirked bitterly, "depends on what why you want me to answer first."

"Why didn't you come to anyone about this?" I reiterated and looked at her.

JC looked me over for a moment and her eyes lowered, "Zo, I really can't-"

"You could've came to me!" I exclaimed. I intended to listen to her and hear her out, I really did, but I just couldn't hold this back. I was ticked off at her and hurt that she kept this a secret. We were cousins, we were close!

"Yeah, but Zoey, c'mon…"

"Honestly, we would've understood," I added, cutting her off again, "some of us have been through it, we could've helped."

"Please, Z…"

"And I thought we were close!"

"For the love of the Goddess!" JC cried, getting me to shut up, "I made a damn mistake! A pretty huge ass mistake, but a mistake none the less. I understand you're pissed, hell, I'm pissed at myself for what happened, but I'm not going to sit here and let myself be prosecuted over something that you've done too! I know I'm not going to fix this right away, but if I can't get a word in to defend myself and explain the situation, how am I supposed to even start making things better?" she shouted and turned away, taking a few breaths. "Maybe this was a bad idea for now, I should just go, we can try this later," she said much more calmly, and started walking back to the castle.

"JC…Jenny, wait," I called and she turned back around, "I'm sorry, but you have to understand what I'm feeling right now after that bombshell."

"I do, quite literally actually," she agreed, "I can feel them rolling off of you in waves. But you have to understand the kind of situation I'm in too. Can we just…restart this so I can explain the timeline and everything?"

"That sounds good," I nodded and we continued our path on the beach, "so…when did all this start?"

"The first real thing was my first day of class, somehow Neferet figured out that I could see it and had a slight attraction, that's why she wanted me to stay after she was done talking to the two of us together," JC started and sighed, biting her lip, "the second thing was actually a false alarm. I had a dream I was in Nyx's Grove talking to Jack, and before you ask we were literally just talking about random crap and yes I have talked to Damien somewhat about it, when I was pulled out by something. I thought it was Darkness, but in reality it was my affinity because Kalona was trying to interfere with you or Stark. That's what pushed me to talk to Lenobia…"

"Ok, can I interrupt?" I asked and she stopped with a nod, "how many times have you talked to Jack? And what did Lenobia say?"

"I've spoken to Jack all of twice, that time and once on the way here. I didn't say anything because nothing important has been spoken about and I don't want to pick at and reopen healing wounds," JC answered and looked at me, "we both know what losing someone like that is like and the feelings that go with it. As for Lenobia, well I told her everything up to that point, the attraction and the dream. She said Spirit vampyres could see Darkness because of the connection they had to Otherworld magick through their element, but the attraction was less common. There's a theory about 'martyrs,' vampyres who had darker guide animals that were attracted to Darkness because of it and they had to follow a very strict following of the Goddess and never use their affinity for themselves, lest they started a battle with their inner Darkness and lost their minds or turned."

I stared at my cousin for a moment in surprise. Wow. "Well, for Jack, I can understand because I probably would've done the same thing admittedly, I don't want Damien to hurt any more than he has to. And the second part, wow."

"Yeah, after that was when I started having confrontations with the personification of my Darkness, a few dreams, and she was also part of the reason I broke the mirror with my fist. I repressed her for a long while after the accident ten years ago, but the Darkness that we're faced with now…reawakened her I suppose you could say. The only thing I can do against her is fight, but when Neferet and Kalona know all about it, that makes it hard," she sighed.

"How do they know?" I asked, confused. There was a hell of a lot of backstory to this.

"They're Neferet and Kalona?" JC asked herself and shrugged, "all I know is that Neferet knows a lot, about all of us…and it's unnerving beyond belief. And judging by your confusion, remember all that information I promised to tell you about yesterday when we weren't around prying ears? Yeah, I found out by sneaking into Neferet's office and finding that information out about her and Kalona teaming up," she explained, sensing my confusion.

"JC!"

"Yeah, I know, stupid idea, as already said by Gwen and Zane, but it had to be done," she answered, "oh, and Aphrodite, Rephaim, and Lenobia already know this, but the thing with Dragon and Anastasia that exhausted me, I made her ghost appear."

I stared at her in shock and she chuckled, "yeah, I'm just laying all my cards on the table. I learned it from Indy's book, Spirit vampyres could make ghosts who had unfinished business appear to free themselves back to Nyx's Grove. Anastasia had some unfinished business with Dragon, I made it happen with the help of the book, and it took a shitload of power from my body…so you won't be seeing that happen again for a while."

"I just don't get it though," I said after letting everything she said sink in. It was a lot. "Why did you keep all this from me?"

My cousin paused and looked out at the ocean, "there's that word again. The Jack thing I explained, all the stuff I just told you, I wasn't keeping from you, I just didn't want to explain when we had the chances for fear of Neferet hearing and eating me."

I giggled despite myself and then got serious as I realized she left something out, "and the Darkness?"

"Always back to this," JC sighed and stared out at the ocean another moment before turning to face me. Her face became dark, not like the evil stuff, but tormented and pained, "Zoey, have you ever stared into the eyes of what you know to be the Darkness and evil of your own soul?" I shook my head and she smiled bitterly, "then you're never going to be able to fully understand my explanation as to why I kept it to myself."

"Try, for me?" I asked, almost begging. With that look, I didn't know if I could remain mad at her, but I knew she needed to talk about it, to get it out of her system, at least a little bit.

She looked to the ground in what seemed to be shame then nodded. "I was disappearing in plain sight, Heaven help me, I need to make it right. You want a revelation? You want to get it right? But it's a conversation I just can't have tonight. You want a revelation, some kind of resolution? You want a revelation? No light, no light in your bright blue eyes, I never knew daylight could be so violent. A revelation in the light of day, you can't choose what stays and what fades away. And I'd do anything to make you stay, no light, no light. Tell me what you want me to say. Would you leave me if I told you what I'd done? And would you leave me if I told you what I'd become? 'Cuz it's so easy to sing it to a crowd but it's so hard, my love, to say it to you out loud."

Leave it to JC to figure out a way to express everything she was feeling in song, but to be so horrible at doing so in words. "Zoey, I found out what I was and I was ashamed and disgusted with myself along with upset and scared, and really…there was just a ball of emotions in my stomach. I know what the Dark me can do because I am her, you've seen what my temper can do, multiply by 20 and you have her. I couldn't put you in that kind of trouble or put that kind of burden on you or anyone else in Tulsa with the chance of Neferet and Kalona knowing…and even I did, what would I say? Saying that I was attracted to the very evil we are facing, I was afraid of what that meant and what you would do. Only a few days into being Marked and launched into this whole thing, Zo, I couldn't chance losing what little friends and trust I had," she explained quietly and crossed her arms defensively, "and I've probably screwed it up anyway."

"Jenny," I muttered and went over, hugging her, "you aren't going to be alone in this, I promise you that because we won't let you be alone. Yeah, you did screw up pretty badly, but that's not to say that it can't be fixed. We're on Skye now, Sgiach knows a lot more than we can ever hope to, we can fix this."

"I know…I know, that's what I'm hoping for," she agreed and let out a breath, returning the hug then pulling away, "still mad?"

"Not nearly as much, my anger is more directed at your stupidity than you now," I teased. It was true though, I was still kind of mad at her for what she did, but at least I understood now.

"Well, no one ever said I was the smartest," JC chuckled.

"Says the AP student." She shrugged, we both laughed, and we walked back along the beach to the castle quietly.

"Do you know where you're going? We're like, three doors apart I do believe," I said when we got back to my door.

"I think with that information I can handle myself," she nodded and hesitated, "are you sure you're alright with this? Because, I really could understand if you weren't…"

"You're just a mix of emotions, aren't you?" I asked, half-joking.

"I can't even begin to explain everything I'm feeling and felt right now," JC answered and sighed.

"We're fine, or we will be," I promised, "go to bed, it's getting late and you're expected in class tomorrow. You need to sleep at some point, after all."

"I'd seriously debate that right now," she grumbled, "but alright, if you say so. I'll see you in the morning then, I guess."

"You will, good night cuz," I said and opened the door. Yes, I used our typical names to assure her we'd be alright, luckily she picked up on it.

JC smiled a bit and waved slightly, "g'night cuz."

"So, it went well I'm hoping?" Stark asked as I walked into the room, slipping out of my shoes.

"As well as it could for talking about my cousin's attraction to Darkness," I said and grabbed some old clothes to change into for bed.

"And how well can that go?"

"Alright," I shrugged and walked into the bathroom to change, leaving the door open, "I mean, it was a hell of a topic, but it went pretty well. I know where she's coming from now, I understand what was going through her mind, and I promised we'd help her get through it."

"We are?" he asked.

"She's family, Stark," I answered, walking out of the bathroom and going to the bed, "she kept the information from us to protect us, which, in JC's twisted thought process, makes sense…and besides that she's done enough to prove herself. Betting on her is even less of a risk than what I did with you or Stevie Rae," I added and glanced up to him.

"I guess you have a good point there," he agreed and smirked, pulling me in his arms and laying back, "so if she's alright, everything's good."

"As good as it can be for the situation we're in," I corrected and moved to snuggle into his chest, "I just want to know when my cousin became such a mature, lone wolf."