The Essentials of Sociology

Chapter Three: Eyebrows and Big Ass Folders

A/N: Happy Memorial Day! I know everyone sees today as a day off of school and work, but it's really special to me. My dad was a U.S. Army Veteran from Operation Desert Storm who nearly lost his life in the line of duty. If you read this chapter late Monday night, know that this little piece of the story is dedicated to all of the soldiers that have fought for our freedom through a hail of bullets, those who fought through days of tragedy, and those who have fought until their final breath.

Dad, this one's for you.

-Blue

Reid finished earlier than he had predicted. Looking toward Morgan to notice the agent up to his ears in paperwork, he grabbed his messenger bag and bolted to JJ's office to see if there's anything else to be done. As of now, there's nothing holding him back from escaping right out of the main lobby. God willing, there shouldn't be by the end of his short visit. He wrapped his hand around the cold metal knob and opened the door without knocking, "Hey, JJ. What's up? Anything else I need to do? No? Awesome. Bye."

JJ replied without looking up from her desk, "Where do you think you're going, mister?"

"Out?" Reid asked optimistically.

"Like Hell," she snickered, picking up a large folder that has gone fat and floppy with papers, "I need you to finish this one. Prentiss refused upon sight and Morgan threatened to call the U.S. Department of Labor on me if this thing got closer than three feet of his person."

Reid sighed, crestfallen at her proposal, "Oh."

JJ instructed, "Do it here. There are a few things that might need clearing up on the introduction page. Remember that case we worked in December with the strangled bodies in the lakes? It's that one."

"Oh, man, I thought we buried that," Reid complained, taking the file from his coworker.

"The bodies we buried, the paperwork we salvaged. Hop to it," JJ ordered, looking up at him expectantly.

Reid sat in the chair adjacent to her desk and pulled a pen out of his shirt pocket. He rested the file on her desk and stared at it. It stared back at him, all bulging and needy. Lord only knew how many papers were stuffed into that flimsy manila folder. Deciding it was now or never, he opened the flap and pulled the papers out, seeing big bolded letters on the front page: I saw you and Morgan at the Countdown. Explain! He gasped at the page and flipped through the pile to see an entire blank ream of printer paper. No. No, no, no, no. She's kidding. She has to be kidding.

JJ interrupted his panicked reverie with a curt, "I know you read 20,000 words a minute. 10 shouldn't take this long."

Reid looked back up at JJ with wide eyes, "What do you mean: 'You saw us.'"

"I saw your little New Year's stunt," she leaned over the table with a big grin plastered on her face, "Morgan and Reid sitting in a tree, R-E-A-D-I-N-G until he kissed you! I don't believe it! Wow!"

The young doctor buried his face in his hands and moaned, "I refuse to believe it myself."

"I was enjoying my New Year's appletini and clinking glasses with my husband. Next thing I know, I turn around to see you sucking face with our SSA Morgan," JJ said. "Then I dropped my drink."

Reid refused to pull his face out of his hands, "I wasn't 'sucking face' with him. It was just… well, he just… and then we were just… I don't know, okay?"

JJ shrugged and replied, "Face it, Reid. You kissed a boy and you liked it."

"Don't quote Katy Perry at me," he grumbled.

"Somebody's crabby," she giggled.

"Of course I'm 'crabby'! I kissed a coworker in the same unit as me. A male coworker, nonetheless. For all I know, that's grounds for termination. I can't afford to be fired…" Reid worried mumbled into his hands.

"Technically, you can't be fired," JJ reasoned with open palms, "Only serious relationships are banned. You didn't get hitched in Vegas, so you should be alright."

Reid began to pout, removing his hands from his blushing face and placing them into a tangled mess on his lap, "I don't know what to do, Jayje."

"You need advice?" JJ smiled, "I'm your girl. Go on. Lay it on me. There's little I can't handle."

"If you're that confident, fine," he mumbled, "I… I don't usually do this, you know, the whole holding hands and sharing our feelings thing, but… well… I was sitting there, reading my sociology book, and he fell into my lap during the final countdown. When the New Year broke out, we were… kissing. I don't know how, it just… happened. Then he threw up in a fichus and I yelled at him and walked away."

JJ snickered behind her hand, "Gotta hand it to our Romeo. That was pretty smooth."

"I wanted to cry." Reid sighed, slowly losing his patience. He could feel his emotional breakdown rearing its ugly head.

She scrunched up her face as she thought, "Why did you yell at him? You didn't like the kiss, I'm guessing. Since you're not gay and all, that's probably a given."

"It wasn't that… I just… well, he—he, uh… propositioned me." Reid dumbed down, trying to make the situation seem a little less dire than it really was.

JJ's eyes grew wide, "Like… proposition propositioned you? Like he…"

"Morgan asked me for sex like I was some five cent whore!" Reid exploded, slamming a hand to his mouth to quiet himself before apologizing hastily, "Sorry! Sorry, sorry, I'm so sorry. I don't know what—"

"It's fine! I get it," JJ replied, "You're confused, worried, and a little upset. I would be too if, say, Prentiss hopped on my lap during Countdown, smooched me and asked me to hop in the sack with her. I'd… also be a little upset as well if she were my best friend and spent the entire night flirting with guys, like Morgan did with those girls, instead of talking to me. Her moves would have been a bit contradictory—to say the least."

Reid raised his eyebrow, "You noticed?"

"Who didn't?" JJ laughed, "He was practically on his way out of the door with them and treated you as if you weren't even there."

He nodded, looking back down to his folded hands.

"Even if he was totally drunk, friends don't do that to each other. And they definitely don't kiss them and ask to hook up after ignoring them all night," JJ replied.

"Not usually," Reid sighed, tangling and untangling his fingers and trying to keep his mind off of how nutty he was feeling before confessing, "Oh, right! I forgot to tell you that he blacked out about an hour before we kissed and doesn't remember it at all. But he woke up on the floor of his kitchen yesterday and since he doesn't remember a damned thing, he's grilling me because I'm epideictic. Just thought I should put that into the universe as well."

"Well, that's… that's terrible."

Reid snorted, "You think? I know I have to tell him at some point that we kissed, but there are so many random variables! He could be completely at ease with it and act like it never happened, he could be disgusted and never look at me again, he could treat me like a joke and say I was the only willing thing around… why are you laughing?"

JJ giggled, "You, my friend, are in some deep shit."

"Yeah, well, when am I not?"

She shrugged, "True. Well, now it only comes down to one thing."

"And that is…" he asked.

"Do you like him?"

"No." he said.

JJ nodded, "You're lying."

"Why does everybody keep saying that?" Reid asked fervently.

"You do this thing with your eyebrows whenever you're not being honest. It's your fall," she shrugged knowingly.

Reid tossed his hands up in the air, "What thing?"

"If I told you, you'd stop doing it. Then I wouldn't know anything," JJ reasoned, "Now, spill. Do you like him or not?"

"No," Reid said, keeping his eyebrows as still as he could.

"I'll take that as a 'yes'. When should I start meddling? Today or tomorrow?"

As Reid stared blankly at the flickering TV screen, he wondered for the fifth time today what he was doing with his life. He was thirty one. No girlfriend. No pets. No family other than his institutionalized mother. No friends other than the people he worked with. No real passion in life other than numbers and figures. He's never fallen in love like those people on TV. He's never had sex just for the hell of it. He's never wasted a bunch of money on something stupid. He's never told anyone all of his secrets. He's never really lived. His youth was fading away with every minute and he was currently wasting it on violence, blood and crime fighting. One day, he'll be Gideon's age and will have nothing to show for it. That's what scared him most of all.

"We've both lost so much... but I believe that what we're looking for is in the X-Files. I'm more certain than ever that the truth is in there." Mulder said with a stoic expression on his face. Reid watched with anticipation and waited to get as aroused by his deep voice as he usually does. He didn't. So, he waited. And waited. And waited. Nothing. Rolling his eyes, he considered stuffing his hand into his loose pajama pants anyway. He wasn't doing anything with his life as of now. Might as well get high on orgasmic endorphins while he's at it. Knock, knock, knock.

Awesome. He wasn't in the mood for company. Especially not surprise company. Who could that be? Reid stood and padded over to the door in his oversized tee shirt and socks. Whoever's at the door is just going to have to deal with the way he looked. It was nine… Reid glanced at his wrist watch… eleven at night. Everybody's in their PJ's at eleven. The doctor wrapped his hand around the door knob, unlocking it and opening the door, "What is it?"

"Hey, Kid," Morgan smiled down at him and raised a paper bag, "I've got Cheetos and beer and no one to share them with."

Reid tried not to look shocked at the tall man who had arrived at his door, "I'm not telling you what happened."

"I wasn't asking. You brought it up," Morgan defended himself with a charming smile, "Mind if I come in? It's chilly out."

Reid rolled his eyes and stepped aside, "It's snowing and you think it's 'chilly'? I wonder what you'd call sub-zero."

Morgan walked past Reid, whom didn't sniff quietly as he walked by to get that fresh scent of soap and Dior that Morgan always seemed to smell like. The scent that he'd always seemed to like… Reid shook his head at himself and closed the door, locking it and turning to see Morgan sprawled out on his couch like he owned the place, fist already in the bag of Cheetos.

"I was going to say make yourself at home, but…"

Morgan nodded, shoving a handful of orange carbs into his mouth, "Yeah, I know. That's why I did."

"I don't mean to be rude, but, why are you here?" Reid asked.

Morgan offered the bag out to his friend, "Cheeto?"

"No thanks. I've eaten my stipend of sugar coated crap for the day," Reid shrugged, pacing across the room and taking a seat as far away from Morgan as he could get on the couch.

"Suit yourself," Morgan shrugged, digging into the paper bag and taking out a beer. The one in his hand was empty. He chuckled and put it back in the bag taking out another one, "I might have pre-gamed. Just a little."

Reid sighed, "Which brings me back to my initial question. Why are you here?"

"To get the lowdown on what happened that night," Morgan replied simply. "I thought we've been through this."

Reid sighed, "I left right after Countdown, Morgan. I don't know much."

"Yeah, but you're hiding something from me."

"No, I'm not!" Reid fibbed.

Morgan snickered.

Reid asked incredulously, "What is so funny?"

"Your eyebrows go bat-shit when you lie."

Reid ran his hands through his hair, "So, I've heard!"

"Reid, just tell me. I'm sure it isn't that bad." Morgan replied casually.

"Oh, it's bad." Reid mumbled.

Morgan asked with worry in his voice, "How bad…"

"Terrible."

"What happened, Spence?" he asked, "I'm a big boy. I can take responsibility for my actions."

A part of Reid really wanted to tell the truth. A big part of him did. But, there was this other portion of him that said: If you tell him, your friendship will be over. As friends go, Morgan is one of his best. While Gideon is more of a father figure, and Hotch is like a kind uncle, Morgan isn't anything but a friend. A good, kind, trustworthy friend that has singlehandedly gotten Reid out of all kinds of situations. Morgan was one of the kindest, coolest, most genuine people he knew. Reid wasn't about to lose that over a kiss. A mistake. So, he lied.

"There was a bar fight, okay?" Reid sighed, folding his hands into his lap and looking up at his coworker.

Morgan searched Reid's eyes and grimaced, "Why don't you trust me?"

Reid sighed, leaning over the couch toward his friend, "I do, Morgan! I trust you so much, but… not with this."

"Why not? I thought we've been through enough that we could talk to each other about anything. I don't even know how many moments I've relied on you and told you the truth even when I didn't want to. I can't even count the times you've been there for me. All these years, I've done everything I could to not only be a good coworker, but a good friend as well to you. And this is where it's got me?" Morgan replied, standing up and shaking his head, "I want to be your friend, Reid, but you make it so goddamn hard sometimes."

Biting his lip, Reid tried to keep restrained, "And you are my friend! I trust you with everything! All I want to do is treat you with the respect you deserve, but you haven't been perfect either. Wherever we go girls seem to be more important to you than our friendship. Sure you're all charming and handsome and suave, but you don't have to flirt with everything that moves."

"But that's just who I am! I flirt!" Morgan replied with a bit of an edge creeping into his voice, "I mean, come on! I flirt with Garcia and Prentiss and JJ all the time and it doesn't mean anything—"

"Then why don't you flirt with me?" Reid hissed, standing up to match Morgan's height, "If it doesn't mean anything, then why do you ignore me and go ravage everyone else? I feel like you don't even see me at all! I exist, you know, Morgan! I'm right here!" Reid caught his breath and stared into Morgan's eyes, saying calmly, "I've always been right here."

Morgan blinked, "I… I didn't know you felt that way…"

"Well, yeah," Reid sighed, "Stop treating me like shit and maybe I'll trust you more."

Running his hand down his face, Morgan shook his head and reasoned, "I didn't mean to make you feel like you don't exist when we're in public. If you want… we can hang out more often. Maybe go see a movie, or take a walk, or go out for a drink?"

"No! No drinks." Reid exclaimed with a laugh, "Not anytime soon, anyway."

A/N: Damn, Reid. Way to show Morgan what's good in the Hood. Wiggity wack and all dat shiiat. Blowin' da mothafuckin' roof off dat single room apartment.

Note to self: Learn how to speak Gangster before chapter four, because I'm going to need it.

-The Bluest Oleander