Chapter Eighteen: Rock, Paper, Committed Relationship

A/N: This is the longest chapter yet. Twenty single-spaced pages in Microsoft Word. Jesus Christ. I don't even know how it got this long, it just happened. But I'm happy with the turn out. My two favorite crime fighting boys will talk about something they've been ignoring.

- Blue Moon

And an odobenus rosmarus is a walrus by the way...

"You have to do it," Derek demanded.

Spencer stared down toward the floor, "No, I don't."

Derek sighed, "Trust me, it has to be done."

Spencer folded his arms, "No."

"Spencer." Derek warned.

Spencer looked over at his boyfriend, challenging him in the same tone Derek had spewed out, "Derek."

Derek rolled his eyes, "Come on. It's just Clooney."

"You know how animals are with me. He'll probably sniff me, bark, and then try to rip my throat out. Do you think I haven't been through this?" Spencer replied seriously.

Derek sighed, "I know Clooney. He's a good boy, really. Plus, I already gave him your scent, so it should be all good."

Spencer took a step back, "How did you get 'my scent'?"

Derek muttered, "You're the one who keeps leaving your old drawers in my room. I just tossed him a pair."

Spencer glared, "That was one time."

Derek scoffed, "That was several times. I have about five pairs of tiny, pink boxers in my underwear drawer."

"First of all, I'm a twenty eight inch, so they're not that small. Secondly, I suck at doing laundry, and lastly I over pack. If anything, it's your fault for throwing them across the room where I can't find them the next day instead of leaving them neatly by the side of the bed," Spencer shrugged dismissively.

"Oh. So sorry I don't fold your underwear before giving you multiples—wait, you're a 28 inch?" Derek asked with a shocked look on his face.

Spencer shrugged, "Yeah, so what?"

Derek whistled, "Damn, you're dinky. I thought you were bigger than that, jeez."

Spencer grimaced, "Come on. I'm not that small."

Derek replied, "I've dated models bigger than you."

Spencer gasped, "You've dated models?"

Derek nodded, "Yeah, and they've all met my dog."

"We're not coming back to this." Spencer folded his arms across his chest again.

Derek pleaded, "Spencer, please. Please meet Clooney. It will mean so much to me."

"For me to get eaten by your mini mountain lion? Wow, I see how much you care about me and the amount is shockingly low," Spencer argued and turned his face away.

"Please, man, please," Derek clasped his hands together, leaning over toward Spencer, "I'll give you head."

Spencer kept his eyes locked on Derek's lamp.

Derek placed his clasped hands under his chin, "I'll do that and make you breakfast in the morning; eggs, bacon, coffee, the whole nine."

Spencer didn't move a muscle.

Derek sighed, "I will give you head, make you breakfast for a month, and... I'm going to regret this… I will… go to Comic-Con with you."

Spencer's eye trailed toward Derek.

Derek continued, "And cosplay."

Spencer began to grin.

Derek paused and hung his head, "As… Captain Jack Harkness."

"You've got yourself a deal!" Spencer turned quickly, "I'd give up my life to see that."

"Oh, thank God. If you'd taken any longer to respond, I would have said Rose." Derek breathed, shoulders slouching.

Spencer took a deep breath, "I can handle the dog. I can. I'll just think happy thoughts of you in an overcoat."

Derek hopped up with glee, "Okay. I'm gonna go get him. You just sit tight right here on the couch. He'll come up to you, okay? Just receive him, he's really kind and gentle. He's just a big boy and sometimes that scares people off, but he's sweet, honestly. So sweet. You'll love him, okay? You will. Just let me get him."

After the torrent of words, Derek had gone and left Spencer alone with his thoughts. They had been together for almost a month now and still pretended that they were unofficial. No one knew of them other than Garcia and JJ, and they seemed to want to keep it that way. The two kept it very casual in the office and at work, and tried to play up the friendship they'd previously had so that if and when the team finds out, it won't be much of a social shift. They'd touch each other more often, soft pats on the cheek or upper back, or a casual muss of the hair or tee shirt. Spencer tried not to stare, he really did. But, JJ called him out several times for giving "goo-goo eyes" at the suave senior agent. All in all, Spencer doesn't think he'll ever get this secrecy thing down pat, but damn if it didn't make the sex interesting.

Then he heard it. The little pitter-patter of claws and padded feet across hard wood, the panting of a lolling tongue, the loose gait of a heavy stride; it was him. The dog. Spencer flinched as Derek rounded the corner, holding tightly to the collar of a very large, very excited looking wolf. Spencer could tell right off the bat that the beast had German Shepard in him, but there was something stubby about his snout that made him think otherwise. Maybe he was a mixed breed. Spencer asked as they got closer, "Wh…what is he?"

Derek shrugged, "A dog."

Spencer pulled his legs up onto the couch as they breeched his five foot radius, "No, I meant wh-what breed?"

"King Shepard/Golden Retriever mix. You're a mutt just like me, aren'tcha, boy?" Derek said fondly to the dog, approaching the couch and holding the giddy wolf of a dog back as he snapped excitedly toward Spencer, "Now, hold out your hand."

Spencer scoffed, "And get it bitten off?! No thank you."

Derek sighed, "Really, he's a sweetheart, you have to let him—"

The dog pushed its snout eagerly against Spencer's leg and he scurried to the other side of the couch, letting out a loud, "Holy shit!"

Derek let out a chuckle, "He's not going to bite you. He just gets excited around new people. Especially new people that have had their scent all over his territory. Just let him sniff you, and before you know it, he'll be begging for you to pet him."

Spencer stared into the dog's large brown eyes and the dog let out a happy yip. The beast closed his flapping jowls for a moment and leaned as close as he could to Spencer, as Derek had him restrained by the scruff of his neck, and sniffed lightly at the base of Spencer's thigh. Spencer whimpered softly and sent a growl Derek's way when asked if he was 'actually crying'. Then, he slowly reached his hand toward the dog and almost snatched it back as it inhaled multiple sharp sniffs along the palm of his hand. His large, dark head turned to the side and the dog let out a keen, sitting back on its haunches and extending its neck. Spencer paused, "Honey bee, what's it doing?"

Derek smiled down at the dog, "He wants you to pet him just like I told you."

"I'm not touching it," Spencer stated.

"Clooney is a 'he'," Derek said fondly, "And he likes you. By letting you pet him, he's allowing you to exert dominance over him which takes a lot of trust for a dog. He could easily kill us all in three bites, but he chooses not to purely because he trusts me. Since I trust you, he does."

Spencer looked up at Derek, "Really?"

Derek nodded, "Yep. You've got yourself a friend."

Spencer felt himself release air he wasn't aware he was holding in and cautiously ran his fingers through the fine fur. The dog's eyes closed and Spencer rubbed gently across the top of his head, "Hey… this is kind of nice."

Derek slowly released his grip of Clooney's collar and sat beside Spencer as his two boys interacted for the first time. He wrapped his arm around Spencer and smiled down at the pleasant view. Spencer let out a laugh as Clooney yipped and licked his fingers, looking up at Spencer with adoration in his big brown eyes. Rubbing the dog's head more enthusiastically, Spencer grinned at Derek, "Oh, my God. He actually likes me."

He shook his head, "I don't know why you never listen to me."

Spencer paused his rubbing, "Wait, dogs never like me. What's his problem?"

Derek chuckled, "He's smelled this presence he's never seen in his house and on me for three weeks now. Usually, he's untrustworthy at the first meeting. He protects me like it's not even funny. But, he sees how I treat you and how you treat me, and he decided to like you on principle alone."

"So, he could start to dislike me?" Spencer asked.

Derek shrugged, "Well, yeah, if you smack him across the snout with a frying pan, that could leave a sour aftertaste."

Spencer nodded as he understood, "So, as long as I treat him and you with kindness, he's not going to kill me in my sleep?"

Derek smiled softly, "Bingo."

"Wow, how did you learn all of this about dogs?"

Derek replied, "Observation. It does a lot for a fella."

The day of their one month anniversary came down the line and Spencer had planned something nice. He was going to get some take out, and string a big cloth across two trees in a park. He was going to set up a projector and buy a bushel of roses. He was going to have some the Twilight Zone playing across the sheet with fine wine in their glasses. Then, they were going to go to Spencer's place and make love. On the couch. With that chocolate syrup they used on the case last month. And the rope from that supply closet. Perfection, right? He knows.

All day, he was giddy, but tried to play it off as if he didn't remember so that he could spring the romantic date on Derek at the end of the work day. At some time in the afternoon, he felt a ball of paper hit the back of his head and he turned around to grab it, only to have it snatched and intercepted by a well-manicured hand. Spencer glanced up. Shit. Prentiss. She had a sly smile on her face as she held up the scrap of paper that probably held really mushy information about their anniversary which would be hard to explain since they're not supposed to be together in the first place. Prentiss asked with a crafty smile, "Why did Morgan throw this at you?"

Spencer shrugged casually, "No reason. Probably just to bother me."

She grinned, "Awesome. So, since you two have got nothing to hide, I can read it."

"No, you can't," Spencer reached up as she it whisked away.

Prentiss unwrapped it, "Yeah, right, and I'm going to let you get away Scott free, note passing like middle schoolers? You've been seriously '007 about something lately, and I've got to find out what it is. You don't mind, do you?"

Spencer shrieked, "Yes! I do! Give it!"

She turned her back to Spencer as her eyes slid down the page. His heart started beating quickly. Oh, no. It's all over. They're ruined on their very first anniversary! Damn it! Can't they have one thing to themselves? Of all of the terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad things to happen, it had to be Prentiss reading their love note—

Prentiss sighed a sigh of clear disappointment, "Well, this is really informative."

As she tossed it back on his desk, he read the open note which read simply: "Spencer and Amy sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g XD"

Spencer almost laughed aloud in joy, "Real mature, Morgan!"

Derek sent over a grin, "Aww, you think so?"

"I'll figure it out one of these days, Reid. Mark my words," Prentiss promised, "I'm watching you like a hawk now."

Spencer scoffed, "Ooh, I'm so scared. God forbid, you turn over all of my Big Bang Theory DVDs and find they were pirated."

She blinked, "You pirate stuff?"

Spencer nodded, "Doesn't everybody?"

Prentiss chuckled, "Yeah, but that's why I thought you didn't. I mean, you still don't have a goddamn Facebook account. Everybody has one of those."

"Yeah, I do," Spencer revealed, "I just don't use it."

Prentiss paused, "…you do?"

"Yeah, but my profile picture is a dalek, so you probably won't... realize it's me…" Spencer's voice trailed off as he realized just how pathetic that sounded.

"Wow, that's sad. At least you have some semblance of normalcy at home. How's Amy?"

Spencer smiled fondly, thinking clearly of Derek, "She's great. I met her pets last night, and that was nice."

Prentiss raised an eyebrow, "They didn't gang shank you?"

Spencer shrugged, "Nope. I guess since they trust her, they trust me."

Prentiss nodded slowly, "Wow… that's some Gandhi type shit right there."

Spencer sighed, "No need to be crass."

"Who even says 'crass'?" Prentiss snickered.

"I do, and for your information, Amy thinks it's sexy when I use intelligent, outdated language. She said, 'the bigger the man's words, the bigger the man's—"

Prentiss cut him off, "I don't want to know!"

Spencer began to laugh, "And that's what you get for sticking your nose where it doesn't belong. Go through my shit again, and I'm going to replace all the songs on your iPod with an audio recording of me and Amy having sex."

Prentiss reeled back, "Remind me to never cross you."

Spencer turned back to his desk with a contented smile, "I will."

She walked away, and Spencer began to write on a ripped sheet of paper.

Honey Bee,

Nice save! I hope you know what tonight is, because I have something fun planned. Bring a blanket, and wear an extra dash of that cologne you know I like, because I'm going to make sure you sweat it off.

Love,

Baby Boy

He tossed it Derek's way, and it was caught with ease. Derek smiled back at him and Spencer's breath caught in his throat. Wow. He's so glad Derek can still do that do him; rendering him speechless with his effortless beauty. Spencer turned, a blush crawling up his cheeks as he clicked away at the computer. He pushed his hair behind his ear and continued to work until he felt something small sail over his head and right into his keyboard. Spencer grinned and opened the note.

Baby Boy,

Damn, boy, I had something planned as well! I know you're not going to want to change your ideas for tonight and neither am I. Aren't we some stubborn sons of bitches?! Rock, paper, scissors to see whose plan we go with?

Love,

Honey Bee.

Spencer scribbled the word "rock" on a piece of paper and glanced over at Derek whom held up one finger, then a second, and then a third. They raised their sheets of paper and Derek's read "paper". Damn. Spencer sighed and Derek began to laugh loudly, gloating, "Oh, Reid. Always with the rocks. When will you ever learn?"

Spencer hissed back over his divider, "Rocks wins 33.3 percent of the time, and a rock is a more stable object than scissors or paper. Scissors break! Paper tears! What do rocks do? Smash things."

"And get covered by paper, so I win. Ha. Ha. Ha." Derek bragged.

Rossi glanced up from his desk, "What are you two gambling about now?"

Derek smiled, "There is no way on God's green earth that you want to know."

Rossi shrugged, "You know what, this time, I'm taking your word for it since you never finish that statement with anything I actually ended up wanting to know."

Derek grinned over at Rossi, "Thanks for the pills by the way."

Rossi scrunched up his face and waved Derek off, "Don't mention it. Please. Ever."

Derek shrugged and sat down, "Really? I have a very interesting story of what they did for me and—"

"No! Now get back to work before I tell on you."

Derek placed his hands above his heart, "Ooh, Rossi. You sting me."

Spencer sat as well, with a happy, slightly fluttery feeling in his chest as he tucked the papers into his pocket. Tonight's even more exciting now that he doesn't know what's going to happen. In his eyes, he will be whisked off to a world of magic and wonder with his Prince Charming. Even though he wasn't sure he was the Disney Princess sort of guy, the idea was still dazzling. He kind of understands what girls want when they have hopes that some handsome prince will come along brandishing flowers and promising adventure. Although, he's never considered himself gay, Spencer really likes the idea of having a fairy tale life with Derek. He enjoys their movie nights, and their midnight strolls, and their pillow talk. He loves their casual kisses, their heated make out sessions, and their passionate sex. He likes Derek's touch, Derek's voice, Derek's intellect. He likes everything about their relationship. When he's with Derek, he doesn't feel like he's "with a man". He feels like he's with Derek—the person he's in love with. But, it never seems to escape his eye when people give odd stares as they hold hands and divert their attention as they share a quick kiss. Derek gives him butterflies just like every single one of those people's significant others do, and Spencer can't understand why they're so different.

So, Spencer cast a longing gaze in Derek's direction. The agent didn't look up. He was busy following some paper trail Hotch handed him, flipping through, trying to find consistencies. He was beautiful. Spencer almost bit his lip as Derek ran a hand over his smooth head in concentration, the muscles in his shoulders growing stiff. Spencer looked back down to his work. Oh, how he wanted to push the stress away with a shoulder rub, a kiss to the forehead, and a long, warm bath. Of course, the bath would be for Derek alone, since Spencer doesn't understand why one person would want to bathe with another. It makes no quantifiable sense. While the other person is discarding dirt from the day, so will he and then there would be double the amount of dirt in the bath water, and it would stick to their skin, and they'd be even dirtier than before, and all of it would have been for nothing! Spencer almost snapped his pencil in half. Why take a bath if you're going to just get messier?!

Spencer cleared his throat and calmed himself down, rewarding himself on his newly found mental stability with another glance at Derek. His mocha skin stretched across his cheekbones as he squinted his eyes at the page, looking both ways before he pulled a tiny pair of glasses and hovered them away from his face toward the page so that he could read it. Spencer chuckled to himself. Derek refuses to wear glasses. Why, Spencer doesn't understand since he wears them as well. Chances are, though, he may have presbyopia which is a common vision condition in which the crystalline lens of the eye begins to harden and lose flexibility with age, making it difficult to focus on objects up close. It's completely unpreventable, but very natural as it usually starts to occur around or after the age of 40, which is why it is sometimes referred to as age-related farsightedness. Many people have it including Rossi and Gideon. But, Spencer guesses Derek feels aged by it and refuses.

Spencer grinned at his bull-headed lover and rested his head on his propped up hand only to be whacked on the head by a folder as JJ passed him, whispering, "Fawning much?"

"Ow, Jay!" he grumbled, running a hand over the sore spot.

She strolled out of the office, quoting, "You're like one of those lab rats that pushes the pleasure button instead of the food button until it dies."

Spencer retorted instantly, "Hey, I eat."

JJ paused at the door and turned on her heels, "Supernatural fan?"

Spencer shrugged, "On the weekends."

She winked, "That's like season two, Spencer! You know your shit."

"What can I say that hasn't been said before?" Spencer shrugged in the least modest way he could think of.

JJ giggled and backed out of the door, quoting from a later episode, "Eh, cram it with walnuts, ugly."

Spencer bit his lip as he strode over to Derek's car after work. He hopped into the unlocked passenger's seat and waited for Derek to buckle up before asking as they pulled out of the parking space, "Where are we going?"

Derek shrugged, "You'll see."

Spencer pouted shamelessly.

Derek chuckled and turned into the opening road, "I have two sisters and a mom who wants grandkids, man, you're going to have to work a hell of a lot harder than that."

Spencer replied along with the pout, "I love you, honey bee."

Derek grinned, "Awesome. I'm still not telling you."

"We're both too stubborn to be together, I swear," Spencer sighed dejectedly.

Derek turned the car down to another street, "Yeah, I know. It took you four chapters to tell me we kissed and four more for it to happen again."

"Hey, hey, hey," Spencer chastised, "No breaking the fourth wall until you tell me where we're going."

Derek smiled to himself, "I am not telling you and there's nothing you can do about it. Please make that pouty face again. It's hilarious, because you're not getting what you want."

Spencer folded his arms, "Fine then, no sex tonight."

Derek chuckled, "We both know that's not true."

"You're right, it's not."

Derek cackled aloud.

Spencer growled angrily as this was Derek's hard earned punishment, "I'm going to let you fuck me so hard when we get home."

Derek replied with a satisfied smile, "You want it so bad. I saw your little antics today, by the way. Very subtle. You might as well have dimmed the lights, walked over to my desk, and started stripping to Barry White."

Spencer retorted, "Fuck you, I have morals and I'm genuinely mad at you. So mad, in fact, that you're going to pay tonight. I'm talking serious hate sex here. No Physics, no chocolate, all business."

Derek shrugged with an immovable grin, "I love how that's your only defense."

"Well, I would tell the team about your lucky Hello Kitty undies," Spencer replied, "But I won't. If and when they find out about us, I don't want them to think I'm dating a wuss."

Derek shook his head with a shrug, "So says Mr. As-Punishment-For-Being-Naughty-You-Get-to-Rough-Me-Up."

Spencer gave Derek a look.

Derek pulled into the driveway of a Starbucks and turned the car off, looking over at Spencer's frowning face. Spencer folded his arms expectantly. Derek chuckled and leaned forward to press a chaste kiss to his lips. Spencer felt himself blush against his better judgment and he scowled to counter the reddening of his cheeks, "I'm not mad at you any more because you kissed me."

Derek pinched Spencer's nose, "Dude, I am velvety smooth."

Spencer opened the car door and slid out of it, walking around it to meet Derek on his side of the door. Derek held out his hand and Spencer let himself smile gently as he pressed their palms together, lacing their fingers. Ruffling his hair, Derek placed a gentle kiss to Spencer's forehead and Spencer hid the lower half of his face behind his free hand, "Thanks for that. Let's just go inside before I turn into a tomato."

Chuckling at his blushing boyfriend, Derek pulled him in closer and began to walk into the store. As they entered a barista noticed him and asked, "Derek?"

He nodded, "Yep."

She smiled and pointed toward a door on the other side of the room, "Down the hall to your left. Have a nice night."

Spencer raised an eyebrow, "What's she talking about?"

"You'll see," Derek said, reaching into his pocket for a dark cloth as they trekked to the door.

Spencer looked down at the cloth, "You know, I'm not a fan of chloroform, right?"

"Cute," Derek began to laugh as they pushed through the door and reached a dimly lit hallway. He untangled their fingers and walked to stand behind Spencer. The cloth was draped over his eyes and after a bout of protest from Spencer, it was knotted firmly. Spencer reached out blindly for Derek's arm and clutched it firmly as he was guided down the hall to another door. He heard it close behind him. Derek stood at Spencer's back once more, pressing a light kiss to the back of his neck before pulling off the blind fold, "…Happy One Month."

Spencer gasped at the sight. They were standing in an abandoned looking kitchen with a tiny table set up with candles, a draped cloth, fairy lights, and two roses in a thin vase. Near the edge of the room, there was a kid with a violin who couldn't be more than nineteen playing a very slow version of Ludovico Einaudi's Bella Notte. What amazed Spencer the most about that was that he knew that Derek picked the song because of its difference from the commercial version made in the fifties, and it was Spencer's favorite piano piece transposed to the violin. He just wasn't sure how Derek knew!

He felt Derek's arms close around his waist, his back pressing into his boyfriend's warm chest as Derek asked, "Do you like it?"

Spencer turned quickly in Derek's arms and kissed him enthusiastically. This totally trumps Spencer's plan. Derek smiled under Spencer's loving assault and pushed his hands through Spencer's hair as they kissed. Spencer pulled away and beat lightly on his chest with open palms, "How did you even know that I even liked Einaudi?! And the lonely table is so cute. You probably have a big plate of spaghetti too. Plus, the flowers, and the lighting are just… God, this is so girly and romantic, and I knew you were going to make it like that whether I liked it or not, but I can't help but… damn you, Derek. Why are you so perfect?"

"I'm not perfect," Derek replied softly, "I just… love you. So much. And when I got the chance to show you, I tried not to go all overboard and cheesy, and I know how much you like Lady and the Tramp, but hate the modern music and… I started not to care if I made a fool of myself doing this because… I've fallen in love with you and don't want to fall out."

Spencer glanced toward the ground, that small smile apparent on his face even though he tried not to look too overjoyed. That was the nicest thing anyone's ever said to him. Ever. He covered his face with his hand again and Derek took hold of it lightly, pushing his chin up to look back at him, "Please, don't hide your face. Why are you hiding your face?"

"I don't know…" Spencer replied.

Derek retorted, "Well, that's a lie. You know everything."

Spencer paused, "Hmm… true."

Fondly, Derek smiled, "Shall we?"

The night ended much like all of their dates do. Flabbergasted by the amount of affection and cutesy niceness shown by their other, the two of them get overwhelmed with emotion that they don't know how to handle and end up trampling each other through the house like an eight legged monster simply trying to get to the bed. They end up at Spencer's house because it was closer and practically flipped off the stairs because making out in the elevator somehow made more sense. Derek shoved Spencer into the open doors and, back to the wall, Spencer grabbed Derek by the shoulders to latch back onto him. Spencer let out noises of delight while clawing at Derek's shirt, trying to will it off of him by desperation alone and they barely heard the doors close behind them. As Derek's lips took to Spencer's neck, Spencer felt a presence in the elevator and turned to see that kid from the fourth floor that heard them jerk off that one time, "Oh, hey."

The kid raised an eyebrow, "So, this is Derek?"

Spencer nodded, clenching his teeth together as he fought an embarrassing moan caused by Derek's talented, plundering lips, "Yeah."

"He seems nice," the kid snickered.

Spencer gasped out, "Forgive us our manners, we're a little bit—eep!" Derek hoisted Spencer's legs around his waist and pushed him further into the wall, "…excited."

"How long's it been? Last time I heard you was like two Wednesdays ago," the kid asked.

"A week, I think," Spencer looked down at Derek's head which was busy on his collarbone, "It was a week, right, honey?"

Derek grunted a response that sounded more like a yes than a no.

Spencer shrugged and the elevator beeped. Derek took that as permission to carry Spencer out and down the hall. Spencer waved at the kid as he disappeared from view, "Have a nice night."

The kid grinned, "Believe me, I will."

As the elevator door slid closed, Spencer brought their lips back to a ravishing touch and ran his hands down Derek's body, "Love the way you let him know who I belong to. Mmm, it's so hot when you mark your territory. Oh, my God. Kiss me right here. In the hallway. In front of everybody."

Even though there was no one there to see them, Derek thrust Spencer's back to the wall and kissed him hard, one hand fisted in his hair and one on the back of his left thigh. Spencer's legs tightened against Derek as they got as close as they could to each other. It was downright dirty. There were tongues, hands, and butt groping galore, so there was no way around admitting that it was raunchy as hell. They're not usually like that (in public), but the two were at their limit.

The night had been filled with subtle winks and legs brushing together under the table, but the work day was just a ten hour long game of foreplay. Spencer had dropped his pencil twice on the way to the sharpener that morning, dipping low to the ground to pick it up. Derek countered that motion by spending the better part of an hour playing with a toothpick with his lips and tongue after lunch. And—since according to JJ this will drive any normal man to tears—Spencer stopped by the ice cream stand down the street on his break, bought a cherry popsicle, and damn near went to town licking it. After about two minutes of watching Spencer's lips slide up and down the phallic object, Derek had resorted to keeping a book in his lap. Then two books. Soon after, he took a quick trip to the bathroom, hissing "fuck you" as he scurried by.

For now, though, their hips were rubbing together, their tongues were halfway down the other's throat, and their hands were inside the other's shirt. Derek swallowed Spencer's quiet whimpers as hard crotch ground into hard crotch. Spencer reached behind him and unlocked his door, opening the door so that Derek can take them inside. Pressing Spencer to the other side of the door, Derek locked the handle and whispered, "You should deadbolt this thing. Safety first." Ignoring him, Spencer shoved his hands into Derek's pants, retrieving the prize. Brashly and roughly, Spencer rubbed and rubbed until Derek begged him to stop.

Derek then fell to his knees and unzipped Spencer's slacks, shoving his boxers to the ground before unflinchingly licking up and down Spencer's stiff length. Spencer swore loudly. Well, this was a new one. They'd never really started with this. Usually, Derek waits until the very end if he does it at all. Derek did promise he would, but he never gave an exact date as to when. Seeing the surprise in Spencer's eyes, Derek began to teasingly suckle lightly on the head. Spencer gasped, unable to hold back the stutter in his hips as he shoved into Derek's mouth. He apologized profusely and tried to keep steady with all of this new stimulation. He's never been touched like this. So wet, so hot, so perfect. Spencer felt Derek lean forward and pushed in as much as Derek let him. Derek started to lick and suck harder and Spencer lost it as he suddenly found himself racing toward his peak of sexual pleasure. Derek let Spencer fuck his face until he shouted a quick warning that he was going to come. Derek didn't stop. He just kept. On. Going. Even Spencer didn't have that kind of stamina on his knees. Come to think about it, he didn't think he saw Derek take a breath. He's far too good to have not done this before.

Then he stopped.

God fucking damn him.

Derek looked up at Spencer with pure adoration in his eyes and stood to grab his hand, tugging him to the bedroom. Spencer started to go, but felt trapped as his legs were bound at the ankle. He sighed, "Shit." Spencer hopped along, pulling of his shoes and socks before tackling the slacks. Derek looked back at him and shook his head, continuing along with a sexy, manly, powerful stride that definitely didn't say "just got done sucking a guy's dick". This guy is stone cold smooth. Spencer followed him into the room and dropped his pants, socks, and shoes off beside him. Letting out a soft keen as Derek grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him onto the bed, Spencer worked on evening out the playing field. He still had a tie, a sweater vest, and a button down to get rid of. Derek, clearly not set on helping this time stayed on the other side of the bed, pulling his shirt over his head in one quick swoop. Done. Spencer's tie was becoming a giant knotted snake in his hands as he stared, mind floating off into outer space as his eyes traveled greedily over Derek's bare chest. Chuckling, Derek climbed onto the bed and loosened Spencer's tie, pulling the vest over his head and starting on the buttons, "What happened, baby boy? I know you're not the shy type when we're in here."

"I'm not shy. I'm just way too turned on and my motor skills are suffering because I'm not thinking as much as I usually do. It could best be explained by a series of equations, but I'm not really in the mood to ramble," Spencer replied, adding as an afterthought, "Thanks for the oral, by the way."

Derek grinned back at him, "Hey, a promise is a promise."

Spencer leaned up into Derek's embrace with a kiss, "And, boy, do you deliver. Where did you learn all of that?"

Derek shrugged, "Buford's cabin."

Spencer paused and withdrew a bit, "Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. I'll never ask for it again, I mean, I didn't know that you would have had to do something like that with that guy, and if memory serves right, I'm the only other guy you've been with and for that I apologize so, so, so much. Derek, I—"

Derek ran a gentle hand down the side of Spencer's face, "Hey, hey. None of that. I'm not upset at you, and I don't regret doing that just now. You and he are two different people, I can separate that in my mind. You're classy," Derek kissed him once, "And sexy," Derek kissed him again, "And warm," Derek kissed him once more, "Plus, all them noises you were making were oh, so sensual. I wanted to finish you off for the express purpose of hearing you come. Does that sound like rape to you?"

Spencer shook his head sheepishly, "No."

Derek grinned, "Sounds like somebody wants more…"

"Oh, no. That's fine, we don't have to—"

Derek replied with a sly smile, "Why so eager?"

Spencer stuttered, "I… I'm not eager, I just—ah, I—I just wanted to…"

"Mmm, and here's where the smart boy shuts his trap," Derek smirked, leaning forward to capture his lips in a soft, yet forceful kiss. Spencer found his hands rising to the back of Derek's head as his back hit the sheets. Derek ran his fingers down Spencer's lower waist, gripping him tight and holding him in place as their kisses became more passionate and lustful. Their bodies connected softly at the chest, making the slighter man shudder. The taut, compact muscles of Derek's chest colliding with his was enough to push him over the edge, he was already so close.

Derek looked up at Spencer and grinned, beginning to press soft kisses further and further down Spencer's body deep into his inner thigh. Spencer's breath hitched as Derek's lips went to work. He loved it when Derek kissed his body, his legs, and his hipbones, but today, that didn't seem to be his plan. Derek murmured, "I always finish what I've started." Spencer turned his face away as Derek went down on him, sucking and licking mercilessly as he started to cry out. Christ, he was good at that. Spencer felt a familiar warm, rush of heat in his stomach and the excitement deep in his chest like the rush of anticipation. His voice seemed separate from him as he pushed into Derek's mouth harder and harder until he came. Spencer could feel Derek's throat at work as it happened and he groaned loudly, growing sensitive very quickly. Derek picked up on that, as he was beginning to know Spencer's body. So, in those regards, he kept teasing until Spencer was a sweaty, panting heap on the sheets.

The elder agent beamed at the sight and poked Spencer's chest, "Hey… you still breathing?"

It took a moment for Spencer to breathe shakily through an aftershock, "…I think so."

Derek ran his large, warm hands down Spencer's chest, "Good, because we are so not done."

"What else could you possibly want from me?" Spencer gasped out.

"Nothing much," Derek chuckled as he moved up Spencer's quivering body to press a kiss to Spencer's lips with his own well abused ones, "Just your soul."

Spencer shrugged, sighing out, "Oh, I guess that's okay then."

Derek kissed him again, hands steady on Spencer's hips as his tongue slipped gently into the mix. Spencer purred animalistically and fell into the kiss, loving the harsh slide of lips and tongue. Derek was so arousing, and so unbelievably talented, that Spencer's recently emptied length showed signs of awaking anew. Derek began to chuckle, probably feeling it too. Spencer pushed a hand down to unzip Derek's pants and tug down all offensive cloth. He needed skin-on-skin contact. Now. Spencer groaned loudly as he felt Derek's hard-on rub against his inner thigh and shoved more and more passion into the kiss. He fucking lived for this nowadays. The expectation, the need, the goddamn principle of the matter! Spencer only admits to himself how much he truly craves Derek's body when they're in bed together and holy fucking hell, it's a lot. Then it wasn't. Spencer was raised above Derek now. Derek must have shifted their positions. Hmm, maybe he wants Spencer to take control like he did on the table at Derek's apartment. Spencer chuckled darkly against Derek's lips, "Has somebody been a bad boy?"

Derek panted, "Yeah. I've been terrible. You gonna punish me?"

Spencer whispered into his ear, "Oh, fuck yes."

Derek pushed their faces together again, clearly enjoying the turn Spencer was taking. Need he say, their sex life was never boring. Whenever things got stale, Spencer always knew what to say. Derek leaned back a little bit, raising his legs around Spencer's waist and Spencer stopped quickly, a hesitant hand on his chest, "Hey… what, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong," Derek replied with a casual smile, tugging him back down for a kiss, "What are you talking about?"

Spencer obliged and ignored the strange feeling of the unknown piling up into his chest as Derek's hips aligned with his in a way they haven't before. It was just then that Spencer realized Derek was blatantly acting less dominant tonight, letting Spencer take hold of the reigns almost completely. First, the blow job, and now this? While Spencer likes expressing his enthusiasm in bed, there is a very bold line between being a respectful sexual partner and losing one's self-given submissive title. Spencer enjoys bed wrestling as much as the next guy, but this is like... oceans different from how Derek usually acts when they're messing around. Refusing to resort to a profile, Spencer asked, "Okay, something's up. Why am I up here so long?"

Derek shrugged, "Just thought we'd switch it up tonight."

Spencer sat up, face full of worry, "We haven't talked about this."

Derek replied, "What's there to talk about?"

Spencer hissed quickly, "I don't know how to do what you do! I mean, come on! Don't I at least get a briefing lesson?"

Derek began to smile as he caught on, "Okay, you put your dick in and we start fucking. I wasn't aware it was rocket science."

Spencer threw his hands up, "Might as well be! You make it sound so easy, but it's not!"

"How is it not easy?" Derek asked.

"There are a million reasons why it isn't!" Spencer whispered quickly as if they may be overheard, "I'm too nervous and ill-experienced! Did you know that if I do a really bad job, I can hurt you. I don't think I could handle it if I did. I mean, what if-"

Derek peered into Spencer's eyes, "Why are you lying to me?"

Spencer glared at Derek with challenge in his eyes, "I'm not lying, I'm giving you my honest opinion on why I could potentially be a really bad sexual partner."

Derek raised his hands in surrender, "Dude, I watched your tell, and if you're not flat out lying to me, you are practicing some organized, intricate ass truth-telling. There's something you don't want me to know. It's fine. I get it. I'll let it go. But, I say, we at least try it."

Spencer hissed, "I'm not doing it!"

Derek ran his hands up Spencer's back soothingly, "Come on, Spencer, just once. I swear I want to feel you. Like, I really, really want to."

"No!"

Derek folded his hands under his chin, "Please."

Spencer turned away, "Derek, no."

Derek poked out his lower lip, "Please, please, please with sprinkles and a cherry on top—if you tell JJ I said that, you're dead by the way."

Spencer reeled back and moved to sit on the edge of the bed, putting his head in his hands, "No. I… I can't."

"Okay. I digress," Derek scooted up beside him, legs dangling next to Spencer's, "At least give me a better reason for why than that bullshit you just handed me."

"Fine... you want to know? You got it," Spencer took in a deep breath and leaned away from Derek, "I'm… I'm not quite sure of my sexuality. It seems to be all over the place and what I really want is to figure it out before we… well, before I… do anything to you."

Derek folded his arms over his chest, "So, all of this fuss… is about you being afraid to fuck me… because I'm a guy?"

Spencer sighed quickly, "You make it sound so vapid."

"We've been dating for a month. I confided in you that I loved you, and I want to fucking submit to you! What do you think I've been trying to do all night?! I fucking love you, and I'm trying over and over again to show you and prove it to you! Do you know how much internal shit I had to go through to even admit to myself that I want you to do this to me?!You are the first guy I've ever touched since I was molested, man!" Derek's voice began to raise, "And you won't touch me back because you're afraid it's too gay? Tell me, Spencer, how is taking it up the ass less gay than dealing it? Huh, how is laying there less gay than…oh, no."

Spencer shook his head and raised his palms, "Derek, don't go there."

Derek asked, "Do you think it's easier to take it because you can somehow tell yourself that it wasn't you doing it?"

Spencer turned back to his boyfriend, "How—how… do you know I'm thinking that?"

"You think I wasn't saying those words to myself before?" Derek stated, shaking his head angrily, "You think I don't know how it feels to be touched against my will, praying to God that it wasn't gay if he was hurting me? Knowing the only outlet I had for my confusion was bending over for someone else? Someone that didn't love me?"

Spencer replied, "I know you love me and I love you! I just need time to—"

Derek asked impatiently, "To what? Second guess our relationship because you want to try boning women?"

"I need a goddamn second, okay?!" Spencer cried out, "I spent all of this time lying underneath you, letting you fuck me, thinking that it wasn't what it was simply because I loved you! You made me feel good, and I want you, and I think about you when you're not around! But, dammit, I'm not ready to put a label on myself! I don't know what I am, all I know is that I'm in love with you!"

"Why isn't that enough?!"

"Why does it have to be?!"

"Because if we love each other than it shouldn't matter what you are!"

"But it does! It matters to me to me! I have three goddamn doctorates on every scientific subject I could get my hands on! I know libraries worth of shit, but I don't have a fucking clue who I am! Do you have any idea how painful, and confusing, and mind fucking it is to be able to identify an odobenus rosmarus but not your own fucking self?! So, I can't poke all the bells and whistles just yet, because I don't want you to think I am what I'm not!" a few angry tears started to course down Spencer's cheek as he finished softly, "...I don't even know what I'm not."

"Spencer…"

There was a pregnant silence before Derek finally sighed, running a hand down his face, "Fuck, Spence, I didn't know…"

Spencer wrapped his arms around his thin body, body threatening to quake as he said quietly, "Aside from my mom, you're the only person I've ever let see me naked. Did you know that? That's how much I trust you."

Derek pulled Spencer in close with an arm about his tiny shoulders, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have rushed you."

"Damn skippy," Spencer scoffed, wiping the loose tears from his cheeks and sniffing, "Fuck, I can't believe I'm acting like such a fucking girl right now."

"You're not acting like a girl, okay. Sometimes tears have to happen, so let it," Derek nuzzled his nose into Spencer's hair, "Just know that I don't want to be the one to hurt you. All I want to do is be there for you, pick up the pieces, make you feel comfortable… I really fucked up, I know, but you have to understand what I was saying, man. This whole thing could have been avoided if we talked it out. If we don't have communication, we don't have nothing. So, you do know I wasn't just yelling to hear the sound of my voice, right?"

"I do," Spencer replied, "You felt like you had to justify yourself because I was making it seem like… you were raping me."

Derek winced, "You did."

Spencer murmured wiping another stray tear before it could escape from his eye, "I'm sorry."

Derek smiled calmly, "You're forgiven."

Spencer breathed into the quiet air, "I love you."

Derek held him closer, "I know."

Not liking the intimacy of the freshly patch up fight, Spencer snuffled and changed the subject quickly, "I think my bed is cursed."

Derek asked with a chuckle, "Why is that?"

"Every time we're in it, it causes a fight." Spencer counted off onto long fingers, "The black out thing, the fire alarm thing, and now this. Once is an accident, twice is a coincidence, and three times is a pattern."

Derek replied, "Well, hot damn."

Spencer smiled, "I think I need a new mattress."

Derek laughed aloud, "Hell, maybe you do."

A/N: "The feels are strong with this one."

- Blue Vader