Author's Note: Warning - this chapter contains a disturbing scene. I do not go into graphic detail, but still. Oh, and I also make a potentially libelist remark about McDonalds. If any lawyers of the franchise powerhouse are reading this (hello!) please note that the views expressed by Isabella Flanagan do not necessarily reflect the views of BellaFlan. Happy Meals rule. Ahem...

How could you just leave me standing
Alone in a world that's so cold - Prince, When Doves Cry

Shit, I was so lost it wasn't even funny. How did I get this far off the road? "Jacob," I called. "C'mon, boy. It's really fucking cold out."

I dialed my iPhone with numb fingers. "Hey, Deb. Are you sure you saw him over by the pond? The woods are dark as shit. I left Ethan in the car asleep which was kind of stupid, I know. Can you wait for me by the car when you pick-up this message? It's parked at the south lot."

The muddy grass around the pond was covered in some kind of bird shit. I traversed the wet grass as carefully as I could but as usual, I stumbled about like a graceless twat. There was a tension in the air that I could not name. I'm fucking freaking myself out. It's not like I was afraid of the dark or anything. I knew there were no unseen demons lurking. Nothing usually scared me at all. Trouble always just avoided me, like the fates knew better than to fuck with Isabella Flanagan.

A sudden commotion in the bulrushes made me jump with another start. "Shit! Jake, is that you?" A furious flutter of white and a terrible honking and hissing sound responded. It was a fucking swan, of all goddamn things. A fucking swan was hissing and spitting at me! "Calm the fuck down, dude. I'm not after your eggs."

I didn't blame him though. Some assholes had broken the necks of the native swans last year. Perhaps news got around to the new batch.

Birds could be fucking vicious. A goose once attacked me for my hamburger at this very same park. Geese from this pond were fed McDonald's so much by well meaning, but stupid suburbanites. The birds had a taste for the crappy meat now. Made them mean as shit. Interesting phenomenon, though. The same rabid response can be witnessed in four-year-olds that are bred on Happy Meals.

My shoes squashed into mud as I gave the mighty birds a respectfully wide berth. The path had disappeared about half a kilometre back and I was navigating through marsh only by the light of my phone now. "Jacob Flanagan, you stupid-ass mutt! I swear, I'll leave you to be eaten by coyotes if..." I tripped and fell forward.

"Fuck," I muttered and wiped the mud and bird poop off my hands and onto my jeans. "Stupid fucking dog."

I froze at the sound of sloshing footsteps.

"Hey, darling." A voice materialized from behind me. I pulled myself off the ground but got kicked back down onto my knees. "Get on all fours, pretty thing."

No fucking way. No fucking way was this asshole going to fuck with me.

"What do you want?" I tried to speak calmly but had trouble controlling the hysterical timbre in my voice.

"Ah, shit, baby. Don't be like that." He flashed something metal in my peripheral and my hysteria was replaced with terrorized shock. My limbs went completely numb with fear and my breathing quickened beyond my ability to catch up.

Fight or flight. Fight or flight.

I never thought I'd be the damsel in distress. I always imagined that if I was ever attacked, I would somehow be brave and kick ass. I knew the rules: Never beg for one's life.

"Please?" I begged.

"Stand-up." His voice was cold now.

I stood, nearly tripping on my rubber legs. "What do you want?" My voice sounded like it was coming from someone else. Not me. This couldn't be happening to me.

"Take your pants off."

"Please," I begged. This shit doesn't happen to me!

"Take them off or I'll cut you."

He pulled me off the ground and pressed the tip of the knife into the small of my back.

-({})-

"Jacob," I whispered. "You were a dog."

That wasn't what I meant to say. I wanted to know why he was crying and also, what happened to Laurent. In addition, I was very curious to know more about the canine thing, because that was fucking weird. And shit, I knew weird.

"Laurent. Is he..." Surely, they didn't kill him? I tried to speak again, to ask how long he had been a wolf for but everything felt frozen. I couldn't form an intelligent thought.

"Bells? You're freezing." He lifted me into his arms. "How long have you been in the woods?"

How long had I been here for? Something happened to me. What was it?

"I never left. I've been here forever. Like Cathy and Heathcliff, I wander the woods with Edward's ghost."

"Shh, Bella. You're going to be fine. I think you have hypothermia or something. I'm going to take you to the hospital."

"The morgue, Jake. I died."

-({})-

This didn't happen to me. I shut myself off, refusing to feel. I heard his voice but didn't really listen.

"I'm gonna cut you, bitch. Look at me!"

I couldn't. It wasn't real.

-({})-

"Put me down," I sobbed and raked my nails over his skin. "I was supposed to die today. Give me back my death!"

"No, Bells. I won't let you die."

I allowed Jacob to carry me through the woods but I was a limp, dead weight in his arms. My body lolled like a ragdoll. I looked up at the canopy of trees. I could not blink.

"We need to get back to the car," I mumbled. "Ethan's asleep. I left a message for Deb but..."

"What are you talking about? You're not making any sense."

"Put me down." My voice was weak but my desperation cut through the silence. In my head I was screaming.

"Shh, Bells. I need to get you to the-"

"Put me down, asshole!"

-({})-

Edward gazed cautiously at me. "Your memory has holes."

"I'm too tired, Edward. I don't want to think anymore."

"You're so close to remembering. I know it's difficult but I think it's important." His voice was warm, even if his hands were cold. I laced my fingers through his and sighed.

"Jake saved me from Laurent..." I started to cry like a pansy.

"I'm so sorry." He pressed his forehead to mine and kissed my nose.

"How could you leave me? Edward, how could you do it, you stupid fuck? None of this shit would have happened."

"I'm so sorry," he repeated, desperately trying to sob but it sounded more like a honk.

Author's Note: Some brilliantly clever fuckers nominated me for the Twific Indies in two fucking categories! Joking aside, 'fess up so I can thank you properly. Also, I'd like to welcome my new mastabeta (yeah, I used that stupid joke) Jkane180. She's brilliant and writes the hell out of a lemon.

Also, I have an SOB contest entry called Swan Dive. If you like it, please vote for it. If you don't, well shit. wordslinger has two entries and I spank the shit out of my monkey to Onside Kick. It's hot.