And the Marcus/Baird saga continues! We ended with Baird telling Marcus that he was finished, through, caput with their relationship...but he wanted to have one last screw before they were completely over. And it turned out to be love-making instead! On top of that, Dom and Cole burst in while they were finishing...embarrassing! All of what had occurred left Baird with tons of open-ended questions. Will he get his answers?
~*~*~Chapter 6: The Mind Game~*~*~
A few weeks later...
Baird had no idea about whether or not what he did was right. But he felt good about it.
He had requested a transfer temporarily citing that they were running low on efficient engineers. He was planning on making the transfer permanent.
He couldn't face Cole and Dom, not after what they had seen. He hadn't had to face them since that night. But Marcus was a whole different story.
His actions towards Baird was similar to that of Jacinto: he didn't seem to acknowledge Baird's existence. It hurt but it was something that Baird would have to get used to. Thankfully, the emergence of the polyps from the stalks kept his mind away from Marcus most of the time.
He was sure that Marcus' behavior had to do with the transfer that Baird had gotten approved. What other reason could there be? Maybe he felt that it was a bad reflection of him as a superior.
Well, it was. Marcus shouldn't have made Baird fall in love with him. Now people may view him as the incompetent Sergeant that Baird always thought he was.
Baird didn't know if people would actually start seeing Marcus as such, but he did know that whenever they seemed to catch eyes, Marcus' were always shimmering with anger. So it had to have something to do with the transfer, he guessed.
He let out a frustrated grunt as he dropped his wrench in the engine of the Centaur for the fourth time that day. Voices barely drifted into his ears as a few men spoke loudly on the other side of the bay. He rarely wore earmuffs but he needed to concentrate on his thoughts while pretending to work.
He didn't think that the transfer would have affected Marcus that much. It wasn't as if Baird wasn't replaceable. There were a few engineers that were at Baird's level, although they weren't just as good or as fast as he was. It wasn't like his excuse for leaving wasn't warranted: the COG did need more engineers fixing things than on the field battling and dying.
Besides that, it just wouldn't be the same for the four men ever again.
Baird was the person that farted in a room of people and snuck out for everyone else to deal with it: an uncaring asshole, it seemed. He had left Marcus to deal with both Cole and Dom alone which made him feel as if he deserved the title of self-serving douche. He usually was, but he didn't leave people out to hang by themselves.
He brought an arm across his forehead to wipe the sweat. And all of this started with Sam. Baird remembered what Marcus had told him, how he hadn't asked for him. If that was true, Sam had lied.
The thought angered Baird, making him set down his wrench and wipe his hands on a piece of cloth. The bitch had made herself scarce the past few weeks so he couldn't accurately question her. But he knew where she would be now. He knew where she was posted since he had seen her on his way to the maintenance bay, yet had been too infused with his thoughts to think of her then. What better time to interrogate her when he was frustrated and not able to work due to it?
Baird headed out into the harsh sunlight. The weather was cooling fast. Winter would be here soon.
Rubbing his arms as a frigid wind blew, Baird headed towards the large field that was just outside of Pelruan, the same place that he had watched Cole giving the Pelruan teenagers Thrashball lessons.
And there she was, standing at her post, watching the children play a little way away from her.
"Hey! Why did you lie?!" No introduction. No pleasantries. No explanation. He needed to be blunt. Rage was evident in his voice and he was sure that if Sam was a man, he would have punched her out.
She turned to him in surprise, her eyes revealing as such. "How rude! You don't approach someone and start accusing them of something!"
"Marcus didn't want to see me. You said he had something for me to look at. He didn't "
"Look. Marcus told me—" she began, shrugging and turning back to the kids.
"Bullshit." Baird interrupted, walking around to block her view. "You think Marcus would accept that half-assed excuse if I told him?"
Sam stared at him, quiet for a few moments, before a smile crept on her face. "Well, you're not talking to him. So it wouldn't really matter, now would it?"
Baird narrowed his eyes. "And how would you know? I could easily tell him that you caused—" That's when he faltered. Baird couldn't tell her what she had done, because that would mean there would be one more person that knew. One more person that knew that they had been caught fucking...and that they had been fucking.
"That I caused what?" She said, a laugh in her voice. "Your transfer? You did that all by yourself."
He scowled angrily at her. "Why did you lie?" he repeated. "There was no reason."
"I didn't lie." Sam cradled the Lancer in her arms. "You did look at something, right?"
He stared at her, then said slowly. "What?"
"You looked at something. But you getting caught in the act is hilarious."
Baird's heart rate quickened as did his breathing. His eyes slightly widened as he slowly said, "What act?"
"Don't play dense." Sam walked around him, turning her eyes onto the children again. "It's been obvious that Marcus and you have been fucking. And I could tell by what Anya told me about Cole's face when he exited the room, that he was in shock."
His mouth slightly dropped as her eyes turned towards him. He visibly paled as she flashed a smile at him. "You two weren't exactly hiding it now, were you? I mean, you two showing up at each other's rooms late at night, you always turning pink when he looks at you like a shy school girl, you rushing to keep away from him, you paying close attention to anything about him—You practically gave the two of you away-"
"So what are you going to do?" He interrupted quietly. "Tell Anya? He wouldn't appreciate it, you know that?"
"I wouldn't have thought that you would have asked questions about him before yourself, Baird." Sam said after a short pause. "More or less, care."
Baird ignored her, his anger beginning to boil over. "Listen." He said through gritted teeth. "It's none of your fucking business. The fact that you purposely sent me on a goose chase so we would get caught is a low, even for you. He did nothing to deserve it."
"For the last time, I didn't lie. He even thanked me."
Baird's eyes widened again. Her comment nearly struck him dumb. "What do you mean he thanked you?!" He tried to keep his voice under control. "Why would he thank you?"
Sam said nothing but pointed to her side with her elbow. He turned to see Marcus and Dom speaking to each other. Bernie walked up to the two and began to join in. Marcus seemed relaxed. So the two of them were on speaking terms?
"Marcus was the one that set this up—set you up."
A feeling of dread grew inside of him as he heard her words. His head was reeling. What was she saying?
"But why?!" He nearly cried out, now fearing the unknown. He didn't know what was happening.
"You'll have to ask him that." she shrugged and then moved towards the kids. She then added, calling back to him. "I'll consider your emotional turmoil as your apology that you never gave me. Oh. And the fact that you two have been doing the naughty. Nice gossip."
Baird stared at her open-mouthed before swallowing hard. What was he going to do? What was going on? As much as he wanted to force Sam to tell him more, he knew that she was no longer resourceful. So who else could he talk to about this?
Not Dom. That would be too awkward. Baird screwing his best friend? No. That wouldn't work. But who-?
Cole. He thought. I need to find Cole. He'll help me understand.
When Baird caught sight of Cole working on a shelter near Pelruan's south edge, he immediately headed over. He didn't have time to be apprehensive or to think that possibly Cole wouldn't ever speak to him again due to what he saw. He just needed information and he knew Cole would have it. Being as impulsive as he was, Baird shook Cole's shoulder which caught his attention.
"How you feeling?" Cole said, gleaming his white teeth. No awkwardness. Only kindness. Just as he always was. It made Baird feel good and like shit at the same time.
"Confused, Cole. Very fucking confused."
"Tell me about it." Cole said, picking up a piece of wood for the siding of the house. "Everybody has something that seems to be bothering them more than usual. Even Marcus didn't look like himself."
Baird perked up at the statement. "What do you mean he doesn't look like himself?" He questioned, trying not to sound too interested, remembering what Sam had said. He began to help his buddy hold up a board. "He's either scowling or frowning. That's it."
"No. He looks bad. Like someone told him some bad news. Been like that the past few weeks."
Baird shrugged. "People die everyday, Cole. No one tells him to take that shit personally. Besides, Anya's probably consoling him right now."
Cole shook his head. "No one has died though."
"Well, Anya will make him come out of his funk. But I need to talk to you." Cole nodded at him which allowed Baird to continue. "What the hell is going on?"
Cole stared at him after having nailed the board in. "What do you mean, baby? Are you okay?" He turned away from him to pick up some tools. "I mean, you transferred without saying anything."
Baird could catch the hurt in Cole's voice. "You saw me...fucking Marcus." He whispered. "I didn't want to make things awkward."
"As if us talking right now is awkward?" He questioned, making Baird blush in embarrassment. Cole shook his head. "Look, baby. You can sleep with men or women and I wouldn't care. But you're my friend, my buddy, an important piece of Delta squad. I wouldn't want you to transfer at all. You left me, man." His eyes showed Baird that he was serious.
"I'm sorry, Cole." he admitted. "I didn't really have time to react or think. I mean, you two burst in and scared the shit out of me!"
"We were scared too." He quietly laughed. "I saw more of you two then I ever wanted to see."
"Yeah. Not so loud, 'kay?" His cheeks were beginning to burn more.
"Haha. Sorry, baby."
Baird let a grin drift across his face, but tried to disguise it as a sneer. "We cool?"
"Yeah. We cool." Cole nodded. "But Marcus explained everything to Dom and me. No need to worry."
Baird's skin grew cold and his hair began to stand on end as he reached for another piece of board on the ground to hand Cole. "Explained everything? What's everything?"
"That you two were over after...that." Cole skirted around the word "sex". He positioned the board so he could start to nail with Baird's help. Speaking over the din of the hammer, he said "So it really isn't a big deal. There's no problem."
Baird shook his head, his paranoia creeping up on him. Marcus set the whole situation up, according to Sam. It seemed more than a little coincidental that Dom and Cole ended up in his room. Why in the hell would he do that? Baird hadn't even told him that they were over yet.
"What do you mean not a big deal?" Baird spoke louder, wide-eyed. "What about Anya? Where does she factor into all of this?"
Cole gave him an odd look, setting down the hammer. "What do you mean where does Anya come into this? She doesn't."
"What do you mean that she doesn't?" With all of the years he had been working without earmuffs, he wasn't able to easily readjust his voice after speaking over noise. "She's Marcus' woman! I think she has some bearing on this situation."
"Quiet down, baby." Cole whispered, as Baird's loud outburst had drawn looks. He put a hand on his shoulder and shook him. "Listen. Anya has nothing to do with this because she already knows. She's fine with it."
"She's fine with Marcus cheating on her?!" He strained his voice to whisper. His mind was filling with logical connections. How would she know? Why would she be fine with it? "And knows about what? Us fucking?"
Cole raised an eyebrow. "Cheating?"
He caught Cole's bewildered expression. "What? It's a legitimate question."
"It would be one." Cole nodded. "If Anya and Marcus were dating."
Time seemed to slow down and stand still for Baird. His heart froze and his mind stopped racing. What did Cole just say?
"Were dating?" Baird asked slowly. "As in the past tense. They aren't anymore?"
"Yeah." Cole nodded, staring at him.
"For how long?!" Suddenly, Baird's head was spinning then. So many scenarios were going through his mind that he was beginning to feel dizzy. "I hadn't heard anything about it."
"Really? I thought everyone knew in the Squad." He shook his head. "Baird, Marcus and Anya haven't been together since Jacinto. And she knows that you two have been...together." Embarrassed, Cole looked away.
Baird's energy seemed to drain from him. His head was pounding due to the constant thoughts that he was having.
Marcus had set him up...why?
Anya and Marcus hadn't been together since Jacinto...why didn't Marcus tell him so that Baird wouldn't have to stress out about it? The only reason why he had broken up with Marcus was because he wouldn't ever be able to love him back. And Marcus wouldn't be able to love him because he was in love with Anya.
But they weren't dating now...
Everyone knew they were fucking...when had Marcus told them? And why would he without Baird's consent or even his input?
Nothing made sense.
He leaned against the shelter, feeling very tired. "I don't know what's going on." He repeated, sighing heavily.
Baird didn't expect to be back in this room again and not so soon. He had questions and he needed answers. After his talk with Cole, he had went to his room and dressed down to his trousers and shirt. Of course, he carried his gun with him to Marcus', just in case if something happened.
The shower had been running when he walked into his room. He didn't even use caution to check if anyone had seen him. It wasn't like it was needed anymore. No one was in the barracks anyway and if they were, he didn't care.
Baird had pressing matters that weighed on him. Perhaps people would think he was going in to fuck or just speak with his Sergeant. Their thoughts didn't matter. What mattered was the questions that Baird was going to ask and that he was going to make Marcus answer.
So he had settled himself on his bed with his Lancer on top of the dresser, waiting for Marcus to finish.
He heard the shower shut off and footsteps on the linoleum as Marcus got out. His heart was out of control. He had no idea what he was going to say, but he needed to find out everything. And he needed to find out now. He couldn't go any longer with being in the dark.
The door opened and steam was let out before Marcus emerged. His expression didn't change although his eyes showed a slight surprise when he came across Baird before they dimmed to a darker hue.
Baird forced himself not to look away from the pissed off man with his hair matted to his head, which he was drying with a towel. The towel about his waist was tied loosely. He could see the outline of his cock vaguely. That made him begin to salivate unknowingly.
"At least I don't have to be afraid of the possibility of you shooting me." Baird smirked, looking at the Lancer leaning against the wall, next to Marcus.
"Do you just invade people's privacy whenever the fuck you feel like it?" His voice dripped with danger, ignoring his comment.
"I wouldn't if I knew what the fuck was happening." he blurted out. And there he goes. Baird really didn't have any tact.
Marcus paused, narrowing his eyes. "What in the hell are you talking about?
Baird sighed heavily, not even getting up. "Sam said that you set me up. And Anya and you broke up during Jacinto? And how come everyone knows what we did?" He was angry, that was for sure, but mostly he was dumbfounded. He had no idea what to do and felt completely lost.
Marcus walked across the room to sit on the bed next to him, continuing to dry his hair. "It's not like I went around running my goddamn mouth." he growled. "Sam had said that she'd seen us." He didn't elaborate and Baird didn't need him to. He could see that the older man was beginning to redden. His voice got a bit quieter. "Anya...Anya deserved to know. I couldn't lie to them but I knew that they could keep a goddamn secret."
Baird swallowed hard. "I didn't want to assume—"
"But you were." He said through gritted teeth.
"What would you do in my situation?" Baird snapped at him. "Anyone would have thought that you were cheating! You should have made it clear so I wouldn't be so unclear."
Marcus put his forearms on his knees. "The same damn thing." He sounded so defeated that Baird's heart pulled for him. He was slipping again...into that realm of feelings that he tried so hard to keep at bay.
But now wasn't the time. He wasn't going to hide himself away any more. He was going to be honest, no matter what happened. He had transferred and if this didn't go well, then he could easily make it so that his transfer was permanent. But he really needed to know everything...
Marcus sighed before continuing. "Anya and I decided that it was best if we remained close friends." He slowly turned his cold blue eyes to him before saying, "You don't need to know the details."
"I don't want to know the details." Baird jeered. "I just want to know what it has to do with me."
Marcus breathed hard through his nose. "We broke up the day before you punched me in the showers." He rubbed his jaw as if remembering the hit was as fresh today than it was over a year ago, looking off in the distance. "I needed to sort things out. And I finally did. But she wasn't in the plan." He then looked over at Baird, who was slowly cracking his knuckles. "That was a good shot, though."
"A cheap shot." he snorted. "You really pissed me off."
Marcus just grunted, although it sounded skeptical.
Baird looked away. "You were treating me worse than I treated the Stranded." he added softly.
Marcus was quiet for a few moments before he sighed. "I was distancing myself from you."
"But you stopped after the shower..." Baird's voice trailed off. Thoughts were connecting, but he still didn't get the full picture. "Why did you set me up?" He continued as Marcus tossed the towel he was using to dry his hair on the floor. "What was the point of embarrassing me in front of Dom and Cole? That's what I'm pissed about."
Marcus did one of his slow head turns and stared at Baird with fury. "You think I told Dom and Cole to walk in on us having sex?" He snarled ferociously, his voice raising an octave.
"Sam said—" He began, about to spew out insults.
"I asked Sam to tell you to meet me, because I wanted to tell you something." Marcus interrupted angrily. "I didn't need to tell you right then and I sure as hell wouldn't have said it in front of people. It had nothing to do with Dom and Cole."
"Why would you relay a message to Sam?!" Baird shot back. "You know the bitch doesn't care about me!"
"I was fucking busy." He slowly said, forcing his cold voice to get under control. "She's the only one that I could see that would get that message to you. But then you said you were done. So I didn't say anything about it."
Baird raised an eyebrow. What did Baird ending their sexual relationship have anything to do with Marcus' message? It wasn't as if Baird was planning on never speaking to the man again, although he had hoped it. He kept his mouth shut as Marcus continued, although it took plenty of energy.
"I didn't need to tell you a fucking thing. You didn't need to come here." He gritted his teeth. "Dom and Cole were going to warn me about a possible polyp infestation. It was a fucking coincidence that they came into my room. I didn't set that shit up!"
"How the fuck was I supposed to know?" He cried out in a rage, glaring at Marcus. He wasn't able to keep quiet as long as he'd hoped.
"You would have if you didn't fucking transfer." The dark look in Marcus' eyes grew darker. Baird shivered at the look in his eyes now.
The words rushed out before he could keep a lid on them. "I thought it was best." he stammered, shivering under Marcus' angry gaze. "I-I didn't want you to be embarrassed with having me around and Dom and Cole either. You wouldn't be able to transfer because of you being head of the squad."
Baird saw Marcus close his eyes, breathing slowly. He was trying to get his anger under control. "I talked to Cole about this and I apologized." Baird continued. "It seemed like I abandoned you guys—"
"You did." He sounded like a ticking time-bomb. Any second, he seemed as if he would explode...
"I'm not a deserter." It was obvious that the conversation was taking a toll on Marcus, who barely said any words to begin with. He was about to blow. But Baird needed to make him understand. "I hate that I did that and I wish I could take it back, but I can't."
Marcus was silent. The atmosphere around him seemed to suggest that the conversation was over. But Baird wasn't going to let it be.
He let five minutes of silence pass before he whispered, "Say what?"
An eye of his twitched, although they were still closed. "What are you talking about?" Marcus growled in dangerous tones.
"What did you want to say that you couldn't say in front of people? That could wait?"
He didn't say anything. He slightly bent his head, slowly closing and opening his fists. His body was stiff.
"Is it the reason why you distanced yourself from me again the past few weeks?"
Marcus slowly opened his eyes, looking down at his hands. His jaw twitched. He looked agitated as well as uncomfortable. The red on his face seemed to deepen.
It was as at that moment, as Baird looked upon the man who looked as if he was at a loss for words, that he came to enlightenment. He completely understood why Marcus distanced himself.
Marcus never knew how to express his feelings. It hadn't ever been truly expressed at home. He was, though, an emotional man, as was Baird. But Baird was willing to cover up how he was truly feeling by being an arrogant prick.
Marcus just buried his emotions deep inside or felt awkward when the subject required some emotional appeal. Or removed himself from the source of pain when he was hurt.
Marcus was embarrassed for how he may have felt in Jacinto towards Baird. That could have been the "feelings he was trying to sort out" and why he needed to distance himself from him.
He was possibly also hurt by Baird ending their tryst which would explain his behavior the past few weeks. It fit Cole's description of him: how Marcus wasn't himself and how he had received some bad news...
If he was right...
"Is it...Is it because you want me?" Baird forced himself to say the words. It was incredibly hard for him to do so. He wasn't the type to try and understand others, but he was even less of the type to talk about feelings.
He watched Marcus' body suddenly still. Then his fingers began to slowly form into a fist. Before they could curl into his palm, Baird grasped his hand.
As soon as he touched him, it was as if all of Marcus' energy coursed through his body. He was able to feel how tense Marcus was. He could feel all of the pain that the man kept hidden away from the world, stuck inside which tortured him daily. And he could feel how tired the man was.
Marcus didn't want to keep fighting the war. He didn't want to see anymore people die. He was tired of it all, having to fight for humanity and, afterwards if they won and he lived, to rebuild it. Of being the common man and hiding his feelings from the world. Being a stoic shell with a mess of trouble underneath that he wasn't allowed to unleash.
All of this Baird could feel and there was nothing he wanted more but to alleviate all of his stress and pain, especially the ones in which Baird was related.
It hurt Baird to think that he had been oblivious to it all. He had been so wrapped up in thinking that Marcus was still fawning over Anya that he went to great lengths to pretend as if he didn't care about the man: a mind game that he tried to conquer so that he could conquer Marcus. He had assumed that Marcus didn't care for him at all and Baird sought to change that.
But Marcus did care. He had always cared. Baird just hadn't realized it. And every time Baird would spout out some rude comment towards Marcus after sex, he would say nothing but be hurt. His non-visible reaction made Baird think that Marcus was just using him, which, in turn, hurt Baird.
Baird realized when Marcus initiated their first kiss, he was trying to show Baird how much he cared about him, not trying to use him to fulfill his lusts. When they had made love before, he was trying to get through to Baird how much he wanted to be with him, not just fulfilling the last wishes of a man that had broken off their affair.
But Baird was blinded by false claims that he believed true, his reassurance that he could change Marcus' feelings, and, when Baird had thought that Marcus wouldn't ever give up Anya, that Marcus' feelings wouldn't be reciprocated. There was no way he would have been able to see, through his clouded judgment and the mind game that he was playing with himself, the reality of the situation.
There was a chance...a chance that he could be wrong...that these thoughts in Baird's head weren't what Marcus was thinking at all. Yet, why hadn't he pulled away from Baird's grasp if they weren't?
Marcus looked down at Baird's hand for a few seconds. "No." he said quietly. It seemed that Baird's heart had been stabbed by the word. He was about to withdraw his hand when he felt Marcus close his fingers around them. Baird had to strain to hear his next words. "That I want to be with you."
His response made a rush of emotions overtake Baird and he sighed with relief. Marcus continued, still avoiding his eyes. "I tried to tell you. Plenty of times. Every time you were busy. Either helping the Gorasni with Mathieson's prosthetic. Or working in the maintenance bay. I was even going to tell you when you were sick. Doc Hayman said you needed your rest."
All the times that Baird had seen Marcus and had thought that Anya and he were flaunting their relationship, it was actually because Marcus wanted to take him aside for a conversation. That confession seemed to melt his heart.
A small smile grew on Baird's face. And it wasn't Cole after all that had checked on him when he was on the ship. "You mean it was you who checked up on me?"
Marcus said nothing, but his cheeks were a fierce red and, as Baird gently turned his face to him, his eyes told the truth. It embarrassed him even though he was truly worried for Baird. That was why Doc Hayman hid the identity of the person from him.
Baird's heart was swelling with joy due to the worn and beaten man sitting beside him. He hadn't shaved so he had a shadow of a beard with black and gray whiskers poking out. His hair had a bit more gray in it. But he was still as delectable to Baird, no matter what state he was in.
He leaned close to lightly touch his lips against his, feeling the whiskers scratch against his face. He enjoyed the feeling as he pulled away. He needed to show Marcus that he felt for him as well.
"Do you know why I was truly sick?" He asked Marcus, who gave a slight shake of his head. "It was because...I was starting to realize my feelings for you. I didn't understand it. I just needed some time to think. I was sick because of that."
Baird could see a small smile tugging at the end of his lips. "I thought...I thought it was because of...something that Cole and you had done."
"What do you mean?" he asked perplexed.
Marcus looked down at their hands again, and slightly tightened his grip. "I thought you were fucking Cole." he finally let out.
Baird's mouth slightly dropped in shock as Marcus gave a heavy sigh. "When you two go off to do your rounds, you take longer than usual. And you barely report shit. You said it was because you usually have nothing to report and I understand that. You two were always together though, so it led me to assume that you two...did something. Or wanted to."
So that's what Marcus had meant whenever he questioned about Cole or why he looked at them in a suspicious way whenever he saw them together. And Baird had thought that Marcus was afraid that Baird would have told Cole of their relationship...
"You know I'm careful to not do anything risky." Baird said.
"That hasn't stopped you from being with me." Marcus whispered, his thumb running along Baird's hands, eyes still on their hands.
Baird smirked, shaking his head. "I can't believe you thought that. Just like I did with Anya and you." He continued softly. "But I feel nothing for Cole. I mean, could you imagine?...Ugh, stupid question. You did." That got a small grunt that was similar to a laugh from Marcus. "But that would be like Dom and you—You're buddies. You can't do that to your buddies."
"Friend." The small smile was fading. He could tell that Marcus was slipping into a dark place from the look of his eyes.
"Right. Sorry." Baird brought his free hand to run it through Marcus' hair. He sincerely hoped that he hadn't caused any severe stress with Marcus. The man was only a few years older but he had aged to look a bit older. Baird didn't even have any gray in his hair.
Marcus reached for Baird's hand and kissed the palm. Baird shivered again. But this time, it was because of excitement.
"So what were we then?" Marcus turned his eyes onto him again. "Acquaintances? Since you don't fuck friends."
Baird smirked, removing his hand from Marcus' grasp and beginning to run his fingers along Marcus' wet hair again. "Are we trying to kid ourselves? We were enemies."
It was Marcus' turn to be surprised, but that meant only a barely noticeable widening of the eyes. "I never saw you that way."
"You're fucking perfect." Baird seethed softly, with a bit of resentment, now avoiding his stare. "A better man than me. I hate you for it. For pointing out all of my fucking flaws without having to do a damn thing. But...I love you for it too." The last few words fell out of his mouth as he stared into Marcus' eyes withdrawing his hand from his hair.
There was silence as Marcus just stared at him. Then a half-smile crossed his face and he began to chuckle. And it wasn't a casual one. It was a genuine laugh.
Baird was awestruck. The man was beautiful when he smiled. He knew that there wasn't anything for him to be smiling about, but if they were together, he would want Marcus to always smile. It would reassure Baird of—fuck, anything.
If they were together...if they were only together...
"You're such a kid." He finally said.
"Wha-What?!" Baird quipped, snapping out of his daze. "I'm only a few years younger than you!"
"But you're fucking innocent."
"No, I'm not! And I was being completely open with you!" Baird furrowed his brow in annoyance. He was becoming irate.
Marcus' smile had faded but his expression was soft and endearing. Just as it was whenever he had looked at Anya. "You're arrogant. You're defensive—"
"I've only been saying good things about you, but you only have bad things to say about me?!"
"You're whiny." He muttered, though his expression had softened more. He moved himself onto the bed as Baird looked on at him, unable to control his hurt expression.
"You're smart." he murmured, as they stared into each other's eyes. "You act like a hard-ass but you're compassionate. You talk too much, but you're honest. You're perfect and that—" His voice faltered for a few seconds as he looked away and cleared his throat. "–that and more is why I love you."
It was as if Baird wasn't able to get enough air into his lungs. He was breathless. He needed a few minutes to gather himself after what Marcus said. He didn't expect him to say it back.
But...they had been together intimately for at least six months and known each other for more than a year...
He laid down next to Marcus, turning his face to him by gently pushing his chin his way, holding his eyes. "What?" he whispered.
Marcus growled, looking up at the ceiling. "I'm not saying it again." he muttered, blushing. "It's...fucking embarrassing."
A few moments went by before Baird asked, "So...what does this mean?" His eyes were focused on Marcus' chin. "Are we...official? Or something?"
"I think love confessions make anything official, don't you?" His tone was hard, but his face was relaxed. More relaxed than it has ever been, Baird thought.
"I've never made one before, asshole." He quipped in annoyance. "And certainly not to a...a man."
Marcus was quiet and then said, "Neither have I. To a man."
"But I thought you had relationships with men."
Marcus turned his head to catch Baird's eyes. "I never had a romantic relationship with them." he whispered. "It was just sex and happened whenever Anya and I were taking a break."
Baird hadn't thought that they ever took breaks. Fifteen years long without taking a break? It was rare. Fifteen years strong and it was all over? That was something else entirely. And it was all because of Baird.
"You're still the moral prick." Baird muttered, closing his eyes. "Is that how you became so great at blow jobs?"
He didn't hear anything for a few minutes. "I haven't blown anyone except you." He heard Marcus mutter. " And you're the only one that's blown me. Ever." He opened one eye to see Marcus' closed. Not even Anya? "I was wondering how you were so good for having never done it."
Baird scowled. "I can't stick the whole thing in my mouth. But you can."
Marcus' eyes slowly opened. "You think that's easy?" He whispered. "It's a lot to swallow." Baird's chest swelled. He liked the fact that it was a bit difficult for Marcus to swallow him. Marcus caught his puffed chest and said, "You're so easily pleased."
He made a face at the older man. "I've been practicing." he said proudly. He caught his Sergeant's look and quickly said, "Not on Cole."
"How?" He asked, having been satisfied at the fact that Cole had nothing to do with Baird's blow job skills.
"Whenever I get a cucumber or banana. But...it's a failed cause. They're not the same length or width as your cock-" Marcus' small grin made him stop talking and resume blushing.
"There's no need for you to practice anymore, Baird. Whenever you want, whatever you want, we can do it."
Baird pursed his lips. The appetizing thought that he had had a few weeks ago, being the one to make Marcus scream, was what he really wanted to try out. But it was too soon to talk about it.
Although, there was something that he hadn't been able to do throughout the course of their relationship. "Can I...Can I practice now?"
Marcus stared at his blushed face. "Why not?" He murmured.
He purposely avoided Marcus' eyes as he untied Marcus' towel to reveal his thick cock. Marcus spread his legs wide as Baird got between them, unbuckling himself so that he could free his own cock.
He licked his lips as he stroked Marcus' hardening dick, doing the same to his. Parting his lips, he engulfed the head, slowly licking all around the mushroom tip. When he began to flick his tongue across the slit that was starting too ooze pre-cum, he felt gentle fingers in his air.
He's enjoying it...
Tasting the salty taste of Marcus' juice made Baird even more excited. He wanted more of it...
Baird dared to look up to see Marcus with his eyes closed, quietly moaning in restrained contentment. He fingers curled into Baird's hair as he began to swallow him more, his other hand grabbing the edge of the mattress above his head.
Baird groaned lovingly at the sight, his mouth full of his lover's hot hardening cock, stroking himself and Marcus harder. He wanted to see Marcus in such a compromising position. He never thought the man could show such sexy expressions when he was getting serviced.
He looked on as Marcus slowly opened his eyes, looking at Baird with affection. Baird was immobilized by such a look from Marcus that he had forgotten where he was for a moment. Marcus took the moment to move his hips upward, pushing his cock deeper into Baird's mouth. He continued to casually thrust his cock in and out of Baird as his eyes fluttered close, gently pushing Baird's head onto it.
Oh no...that can't do...Baird wanted to see his eyes that desired him...he needed to see them...
He let his lover's cock fall out of his mouth. "Baby, look at me." He began to gently suck on his balls as Marcus slowly opened his eyes. "I want you to look at me, okay?"
Marcus just stared at him, saying nothing. His fingers though trailed down Baird's face and across his lips. Baird gently bit the middle finger. "And please..don't hold back." He whispered. "I want to hear your voice. I want you to call out my name."
He could see the pale body before him turning a lavish shade of pink as Marcus gave a slight nod of acknowledgment.
With a smile, Baird licked the underside his shaft before taking in Marcus' cock inside of his mouth. Now, he heard Marcus' adoring sighs. He felt his body move in rhythm to the quickening pace that Baird was setting.
Their eyes never left one another as Baird pushed Marcus' legs further apart. He then reached up and caught Marcus' hand, interlacing his fingers with his. Marcus grabbed Baird's free on and did the same.
Tongue licking all around Marcus' cock, Baird decided that it was finally time. He could deep throat Marcus if he wanted to. It was will over mind in this aspect. Without a second thought and eyes still on Marcus, Baird slowly filled his mouth completely with Marcus' cock, swallowing every bit of him down to the hilt.
He watched Marcus' eyes widen as he threw his head back, nails scraping against Baird's knuckles. "Ah, Damon! Fuck!"
Hearing that made Baird's heart beat uncontrollably as he felt Marcus' body tremble beneath him. He knew that Marcus was almost at his limit...The older man had a stronger stamina then this but it seemed to be weakening. Baird's as well-there was already a pool of pre-cum culminating beneath his cock..
Baird took his cock fully once more, loving Marcus' cries of pleasure. He wasn't gagging at all. He had overcome his reflex a bit before. He was careful to not have his teeth scraping against his cock though, which is why he went slowly. Later on, when they were together, he'd be able to swallow quickly like Marcus. He'd have tons of practice.
When they were together...
Marcus pulled his hands away from Baird's, sitting up. "Damon..." he moaned. "I'm-I'm about to cum."
Baird pulled away from his cock as Marcus began to stroke his furiously. "But I want to drink you...all of it." he protested, staring into Marcus' blue eyes. They were usually filled with a deep sorrow, but not now. They were deeply amorous. He watched as Marcus gritted his teeth as Baird took his cock from him and began to blow him once more, stroking him as Marcus had just done.
He had only swallowed half of him when Marcus grabbed his shoulders, digging his nails in his skin, crying out his name. He felt him shiver and immediately his mouth was filled with a warm creamy liquid.
Marcus' essence was finally on his tongue...he was able to finally taste the saltiness and bitterness of it. But it also tasted so sweet...perhaps because he longed to be able to gulp the seed of this man when no one else had been able to.
He didn't wait for Marcus' cock to soften as he let it fall from his mouth. He sat up to see Marcus staring at him, tired and yet relaxed all the same. And happy. It was undeniable that this man was happy.
Baird's heart swelled as he swallowed Marcus' cum and smiled when his eyes seemed to widen, his mouth slightly open. Swallowing a man's cum was told him that one had enjoyed what what they had done and, even more, enjoyed him. It was the ultimate compliment.
Marcus did nothing as Baird inserted his cum covered tongue into his mouth, gently pushing him down onto the bed. He broke the kiss to slowly lick Marcus' scar from the bottom to top. He then kissed it lightly and continued to kiss his down to his jaw, which he teasingly bit. He felt Marcus' body jerk. A hand of his was entwined within Marcus' hair, turning his head away from him as he found the sensitive spot on Marcus' neck.
Marcus' hands were beneath his shirt, scraping at his back as Baird began to tenderly bite the spot. Their cocks were rubbing against each other sensually as Baird began to tease Marcus' nipples, pinching and pulling them.
"Are you trying to get me hard again?" Marcus growled seductively.
"I want to show you what you'd be missing..." Baird said softly, raising himself until he was directly over Marcus. "If you even think about leaving me." His serious eyes stared down into Marcus' slightly surprised ones.
He briefly closed them. "What are you? A jealous idiot?" he muttered. "Do you think that I could even go back to women? " He slapped his ass which told Baird to move forward. "I told you that Anya and I are through."
"But you could go with other guys." he sighed, spreading his legs and leaning against the wall. Baird didn't want to admit it, but he was jealous. He had finally succeeded in snatching Marcus from Anya and now he was afraid to lose him.
"I could.." he said, holding onto Baird's legs. "But I won't." Before Baird could say anything else, Marcus had already taken his cock into his mouth. He immediately felt weak as he entered Marcus' mouth and his hot tongue caressed his cock. Trying to hold himself up with one hand, he reached below to grasp Marcus' hair.
He looked down, watching Marcus' leave his warm saliva on his dick as he sucked him off, his neck craned. He was holding onto Baird's legs very tightly as Baird began to piston his mouth unmercifully.
"You're not going to leave me, right?" Baird said through gritted teeth, clawing at the wall and Marcus' hair. He looked down at Marcus, his insecurity showing. Since when had Baird ever had something good happen to him? He had always been miserable.
Lack of friends made him unable to form true friendships and trust. Lack of a relationship with his parents made him despise them and resent the possibility of being one of them. Lack of honest women that he'd been with made him feel that being in love just wasn't for him. So he never expected any good things to happen to him.
Until Marcus opened up those painful wounds and began to heal him. He couldn't bare to lose him...ever.
Marcus shook his head, peering up at Baird through honest eyes. Excitement seemed to shoot through Baird like electricity. He trembled as spilled himself into Marcus' mouth. He watched him greedily sucking him still until every drop of Baird was in his mouth. Marcus then laid back onto the pillow after Baird's cock out of his mouth. Eyes connected with him, he swallowed Baird's cum, licking his lips.
Baird slowly relaxed his body onto Marcus, putting his mouth over his. When Marcus opened his mouth, Baird was able to stick his tongue inside of him. Tasting his own cum was a new experience for Baird. It didn't taste anything like Marcus': it was completely bitter. But, then again, it was his own. And he didn't want to taste any other man's cum but Marcus.
"How'd I do?" Baird whispered. He was in a blissful state, completely elated, and wanted nothing more now than to sleep. He could see that Marcus was the same way as he watched his body slowly relax as he was slipping into a dream state.
"Amazing." Marcus' side of lips were turned up although his eyes were closed. "You did it."
Baird didn't want to wake him, but he had to say it. To make sure that their new relationship didn't have any bitterness. He wanted to have a clean slate with his lover.
"I'm sorry."
"For what?" His voice was heavy.
"For hurting you if I did. I didn't mean it."
"It's okay. You wouldn't have known since I didn't say anything. Besides.." Marcus added, mumbling. "Your mouth more than made up for it."
Baird hesitated. "And for not trusting you as my Sergeant. You're a decent one, even for an asshole."
"Now you know better. Dumbass."
"And for leaving you alone as well as Dom and Cole. It won't ever happen again."
Marcus looked at him through lidded eyes, clutching Baird in a warm embrace.
"You better not." he grunted, his chin resting on top of Baird's head.
A week before leaving Vectes...
"Here you go, Ms. Bathory. Your canteen is filled." Anya gave a large smile to the elderly woman who thanked her graciously.
But her smile didn't shine completely through to her heart. She could see, past the lines of people that needed water filled, the four men of Delta squad working on repairing a few shelters. As she accepted the next canteen, her thoughts consumed her.
Marcus had been less and less receptive towards her in Jacinto. And she now knew why. He had said that he needed a break from the relationship, due to something that he couldn't fully understand himself. Which meant his feelings.
She had no idea that it had to do with his growing attraction for Baird. He'd known the man for a few months at the time and even Marcus didn't know when it had started. She had thought that it was stress or the possibility of him dying like all of the other breaks before then. But it wasn't.
She knew this when he sat her down days before the sinking destruction of Jacinto and told her that he couldn't get back together with her. Ever. Yet he had promised to give her the reason when he figured it out himself.
Her shoulder was nudged. "Anya, you're spilling water." Sam said.
"Oh!" Anya immediately turned off the faucet from the water truck, looking down at a puddle of water that she had just wasted.
She plastered on a smile that she hoped was real and handed the canteen over. She couldn't speak or she would cry. Fifteen years. And for what? Nothing. She was left alone for another man.
He had finally told her a week after they had found Vectes. It was a simple, "I've fallen for someone else." She begged him to not tell her more. But she didn't think it would ever be a man.
Anya had found out a bit by herself. She hadn't seen Marcus with any other woman seriously. Sam wanted Dom and Bernie had Hoffman. She would take up much of his time so that he wouldn't go see the other woman, which was why she was usually with him on his free time.
She'd call him over the Comm radio to do menial things, because she wanted to see if she could somehow rekindle their flame. But it never happened.
Her eyes drifted over to the men again. They were gone. Her eyes then darted about to find them. Dom and Cole were picking up more materials from a truck a few yards down the road. But Marcus and Baird?
She had taken another canteen and was proceeding to fill it.
She hadn't had any success with finding out who the woman was until the night of the polyp invasion. She had told Sam how dumbstruck Cole seemed to be and how he wouldn't let her anywhere near Marcus' room.
Questioning Dom and Cole yielded fruitless results, because they would say nothing about their friend. She couldn't ask Baird because she had thought that the two of them being together was rare. And she didn't ask Marcus because she didn't want to intrude on his personal space.
She didn't expect Sam to have any information since she was venting to her. But when Sam told her of the suspicious behavior between Baird and Marcus, it made her think back to the night she was on patrol.
She had visited Marcus' room and knocked plenty of times. She had tried the knob and found it unlocked as well as empty. When she was along Baird's barracks, her comm radio had come loose and clattered to the floor. When she was picking it up, she heard a door slam shut.
She was able to deduce that it was from Baird's room. The rest of the night, she checked in on Marcus' room periodically. When her shift was over at eight in the morning, he still wasn't in his room.
Anya recanted her tale to Sam and both came to the same conclusion: that the woman was Baird.
Baird emerged from behind the make-shift house twirling a wrench and Marcus followed him. What had they done behind the shelter? Baird seemed a bit flushed, but it could be because of him sweating. He looked like he was intently focused on the job at hand. Perhaps they were just resting in the shade of the large tree behind the house?
Baird was saying something to his lover and Marcus was nodding, but his eyes were focused solely on him.
Marcus hadn't ever looked at her in that way: that nearly serene look on his face that said if he died now, he would be the happiest man ever. She would always see that look cross his face whenever he spoke of Baird or whenever he saw him.
She envied Baird for that.
Handing the canteen over, she was able to see Marcus lightly tap Baird on his tool belt. He looked annoyed as he turned to him. But she could see his face instantly change when Marcus' mouth moved. It wasn't only his armor that was making him hot, she could tell, as his mouth moved as well.
"Staring at them will do no good, Anya." Sam said, blocking her view.
She sighed. "I know. But what else can I do? Sam, fifteen years of my life meant nothing." She nearly teared up.
"Hon, that's fifteen years of wonderful memories that you have." She responded. "He loves you. He's just realized that he's in love with someone else. There's a difference."
Anya sighed. "And I was so naïve. How can someone do that, Sam? A friend? How can they say nothing to your face while they're making love to the man that you're in love with behind your back?"
Sam shook her head. "Anya, we're talking about Baird. The self-righteous asshole. Who cares about no one but himself. Is it that hard to understand?" She chanced a glance over at the two men. "But...I know he's in love with Marcus. It's all over his face."
Anya sighed again, remembering how she had confronted Marcus a week after the polyp invasion. She had asked him if it was Baird that was his woman. And that was when he told her that for the past six months they had engaged in a physical relationship.
She had tried not to break down in front of him, but she couldn't hold back the tears.
"That's why I didn't want to tell you, Anya." he had said softly, looking down at the ground.
"Let someone tell you that after you've been in love with them for more than a decade and a half. I had hope that we would get back together someday..." she had sobbed out.
"I feel so lost..." she whispered. "I know that it was over a year ago, but I can't get over him." Anya didn't think she ever would. When she had prodded Marcus for the information of his new woman, she never expected to hear the news that she got.
"You're going to have to." Sam said as they both looked over at Marcus and Baird smiling at each other. "He's Baird's now."
"Any one need a refill?" Sam said, standing up from the table. "I'm about to grab another."
"I could go for one." Cole nodded.
"I'll go with you to pick them up." Dom said, pushing back his chair.
Marcus was speaking in hushed tones with Bernie to Baird's right while Cole was regaling Anya with a story to his left.
What a fucked up dysfunctional family made up of comrades.
Baird shuffled his cards as the door to the tavern swung open. Someone loudly called to a man and laughing could be heard throughout. The air was thick with smoke and smelled heavily of alcohol. His eyes stung from the smoke and as he rubbed them with a heels of his hands, he caught sight of Anya speaking to Cole.
Baird knew that Anya was hurting. It wasn't as if he hadn't seen her pass looks their way while Marcus and he were working on shelters. He just hoped that she wouldn't guess that they were tongue-locked behind the house, hidden from view by the large tree. He didn't want her to be tortured any more than she was.
He kept his eyes trained on his hand of cards, pretending to be entranced in his thoughts.
Cole and Dom were as they always were, but whenever they saw Marcus and him begin to converse with each other, they looked away, completely embarrassed. Sure, it was a new experience for them to deal with, but were they that abashed by it? The conversation that Baird had had with Dom had been awkward, to say the least, but Dom told him that he wanted nothing less but to see Marcus happy. And, he had added, Marcus was the happiest that Dom had seen him in a long time.
His arm was lightly touching Marcus' as he reorganized his cards. Baird was going to move his arm, but he felt Marcus' pressing up against his once more. It made his body begin to flush with heat.
Marcus was as he normally was around others. But, he was a bit more relaxed around Baird. Baird also noticed that he occasionally had a small smile on his face and his eyes shone a bit. It seemed as if he had found another purpose to live for besides sucking the asses of the Officers and Dom. And Baird allowed himself to be a bit conceited: He had given Marcus another reason to live.
As he took a swig from his bottle, his eyes went to the bar where he could see Sam and Dom. A look in the mirror told him that Sam was staring straight at him. Sam was as she always was, no more or less. Baird had apologized to her for his harsh words-begrudgingly at Marcus' behest-and she had done the same to him for torturing him emotionally. Now, she was sticking her tongue at him.
Baird narrowed his eyes, set down his bottle, and stuck his tongue back out at her.
"You kids need to behave." Bernie laughed, picking up her cards that she had set on the table.
"Ri-ight. I wouldn't want you to bore us with anymore stories from ancient times, Granny." Baird said smugly. He could see, out of the corner of his eyes, Marcus with his eyes trained on the bottle that he had raised to his lips. But a faint grin was apparent. Bernie just laughed and then continued her conversation with Marcus.
Minutes began to pass and the whole atmosphere suddenly became too much for Baird—the acrid smoke, raucous laughing, drunken talks—he needed a fresh breath away from the insanity. Dom and Sam were still chatting up near the bar, waiting for the drinks that they had ordered. It was a busy night, so it would be awhile.
He stood up without making a noise, surprised that he was a little drunk, and placed a hand on Cole's shoulder.
"Hey. Play my hand for me, will you?"
"Yeah." Cole nodded, tilting his head, breaking conversation from Anya. "You okay?" Cole's loud voice would have normally carried, but it was obvious that the loud din of conversation would be able to drown it out.
"Yeah." Baird said, leaning in for him to hear. "I'll be back."
Anya's eyes were on him and she was saying something to him. He couldn't hear anything, but all he did was nod and then head outside.
A cool wind that carried the scent of the ocean hit him immediately and he almost vomited. Maybe he was more drunk than he thought. He heard a glass shatter inside which made him jolt and even more queasy. He needed to get away from tavern..
His feet were suddenly moving. He didn't know where he was being taken, he just knew that he needed to get away from the loud noise that was making him even more sick. Before he knew it, he had ended up on the beach in front of the Admiralty house, staring out at the large mass of sea behind the ships docked there.
In a week they would be on those ships. The stalks were overcoming the small island of Vectes, polyps were becoming more frequent, and the Lambency had already jumped species. It was time for them to move out back to the Mainland for safety and take their chances once again.
Another wind blew across his face, nearly sobering him. Without his armor, he felt a bit chilly. Crossing his arms across his chest, he heard sounds coming from behind him. He didn't really need to look.
"I'm fine." He said over his shoulder. "Just needed some time to myself, away from the noise."
The footsteps stopped. He heard something being said, but the wind had to carry his words to him. And they made him smile.
"Yeah." He said. "Why not?"
Marcus stood beside Baird. He looked awkward with his arms by his side, his fingers not knowing whether to curl or relax. He finally decided to put his hands on his hips.
Baird turned his face from Marcus, stifling a chuckle.
"What?" He turned to see Marcus' head tilted slightly, his cool blue eyes staring down at him.
It happened in moments that Baird couldn't recall. One second, he was staring at his intimidating Sergeant, worn out bandana, puke green muscle tee accentuating his muscles, thinking of how hot that man looked.
The next, he was inches away from his face, pulling his face down towards him, planting soft kisses upon his lips.
He was happy. Completely at bliss. He had realized that he, Baird, had been the one to fall for his own mind games, not Marcus. He had been consumed with Marcus and trying to rid him of Anya or come between them when it wasn't even needed. He had mind-fucked himself into a depressed state and had even been mind-fucked by Sam. But all of the pain and heartache was worth having the man in front of him.
"You're getting too damn forward." Marcus growled. His words sounded a bit slurred, so it was obvious that he was a bit drunk as well.
"I can't help myself." Baird muttered, his gaze not being able to leave Marcus. "And I'm cold. So get over it."
"Watch your mouth." His tone had a hint of danger.
Baird teasingly bit Marcus' bottom lip. "No." He whispered.
He watched as Marcus' features softened and both sides of his lips turned up. "Asshole." Marcus said quietly, pulling Baird close to his body.
"Dipshit." Baird slowly kissed his scar. He hesitated a bit, searching within the depths of Marcus' sea blues before saying. "Guess...that's why we're so good together, huh?"
Marcus leaned forward so that his forehead was touching Baird's, holding his waist. "I don't want anyone else."
Baird smiled through his eyes, cupping the older man's face in his hands. "That's all I needed to hear." Baird murmured before giving him a love-filled kiss.
Note: Aww! I LOVE happy endings!
*Marcus makes a clear distinction in Gears of War: Aspho Fields that Dom is not his "buddy". He only had one buddy and that was Carlos Santiago, Dom's older brother.
*I wanted to show Anya's view on things, otherwise it would be an incomplete triangle. Everything that she's feeling is essentially everything that Baird had went through while he was trying to play his mind games on Marcus.
*For some people who drink, they become hypersensitive to sound and smells, enough to where they become sick if they are around it. So, Baird is as such when he's drunk.
*There was, actually, supposed to be no sex in this chapter, since I couldn't find a way to put it in. But then I found an outlet..Yay!
*This ISN'T the final chapter...There's one more. :(
And thanks for reading! Hope you liked it! ^_^