The Darcy Lewis Story

Author: daxcat79

Rating: R

Pairing: Loki/Darcy, Tony/Pepper, Thor/Jane

Genre: Drama, Humor, Romance

Warnings: Non-Explicit Sexual Content

Summary: We've heard the stories of superheroes and assassins, but no one really knows Darcy's story… until now.

A/N: You guys are so awesome! Keep the reviews coming! I love to hear what people think about what I'm doing with this story!

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, but I enjoy borrowing them.

Part Four "The Secrets We Keep"

I worked with S.H.I.E.L.D. for months and rarely ran into Tony Stark. Then suddenly it was like he was everywhere. Between him and this strange dance I was participating in with Loki it was difficult to know up from down anymore. This secret I was holding was like a leech feeding off my happy place. I was on edge constantly. I was tired and stressed from lack of sleep. Plus I couldn't stop thinking about my mom. If she was still alive maybe I could make sense out of all this chaos, but she was gone. I'd lost my mom. How do you even begin to comprehend that fact? That you'll never see your mom again? So suddenly I just felt alone, but there was Loki lying in bed feeling just as lost as I was, and I found myself forgetting all the reasons I was supposed to hate him. He listened. I don't know why, but for some reason he actually listened.

"Two months… it's been two friggin' months."

Loki has long since finished his meal, but I've yet to leave the bed because his bandages need to be changed and Loki's chased out every damn nurse on staff. I've been given basic first aid and CPR, but Fury has me taking additional classes so I can take better care of Loki since no one else seems capable of dealing with him. Lucky me. "My mother has always been precious to me. I know not what I would be capable of if I were to lose her to death."

It doesn't surprise me that Loki's a mamma's boy. The picture only gets clearer, and I get the feeling she's the only one who has ever understood him. My dad has always been pretty reserved. It was my mom that had that outgoing and vivacious personality. She was everything John Lewis wasn't, and he'd loved her for it. I loved her for it too. Somehow the world seemed less colorful and vibrant without her in it. I finish redressing Loki's wounds and clean up the mess. I don't even blink when Loki reaches for the new pair of underwear (fleshly cleaned) and pulls them on with care. Due to his injuries I've been forced to bathe him a couple times so there's nothing I haven't seen. I guess I can't blame him for being picky about who takes care of him considering how humiliating it must be to need assistance just to wash. For a man with Loki's sense of pride it was downright impossible, and his only way of dealing was to flirt and make me blush (because somehow it was easier if we were both humiliated). "I guess you never have to worry about that… being that she's immortal and all." There may be a sliver of jealousy in my voice… just a tiny bit.

Loki pulls on some sweats and I help him return to the bed as gently as possible. He's grunting from the pain, but the man refuses to take pain killers. I have no idea why. It will be at least a month before he's healthy enough to move on his own. Thor and I are the main ones taking care of him now, with some help from Jane (though Loki's mood is always darker after she's been in the room). He blames Jane for many of the changes in Thor's personality. He considers Thor soft, but he doesn't even see that he's changing too. Odin's punishment has seen to that. "Perhaps… but the unforeseen befall both gods and men alike. I could lose her just as easily as you lost your mother."

"And I could get hit by a bus tomorrow… so let's all get drunk and live it up. Jeez, this conversation is depressing."

Loki's smile is faint, and there's sweat collecting on his brow, a clear sign that he's in more pain than he's letting on. Pride is a funny thing. "Death doesn't always have to be a dreary end, Darcy Lewis. Sometimes it can be just as welcomed as slumber."

I don't know how I know this, but I realize then that Loki is talking about himself. There's fear in his eyes, and he sees death as his only way out. Thor's told me about his deal with the devil. He failed to take down Midgard and it's not just his life that hangs in the balance. Something much worse is coming for him. I don't say anything, but his words put things in perspective for me. I hate the idea that someone like Loki could teach me something about myself, but I realize I've let my issues take over my life. They've consumed me, and I'm not letting go. Things could be so much worse than knowing who my birth father is, and holding onto this secret. "Tony Stark is my father." I don't know why I tell him that, but I have to tell someone.

He looks stunned and confused, and a little bit speechless. I find that amusing. Loki… speechless. "Beg your pardon."

"Iron man… Tony Stark… he's my real father… my birth father. I only found out two months ago and now I see him all the time and he barely remembers my name usually. I haven't told anyone. I haven't told Jane. I haven't told Thor. I haven't told a single person since I got back."

"And you decide to share this knowledge with me?"

"No one would ever believe you if you blabbed."

"I see your point."

"I hate secrets."

Loki smiles. "Well then, you have chosen your confident wisely… I love them."

I'm pretty sure if I hug the god of mischief I might hate myself later. Instead I just laugh and shake my head. A weight is lifted off of me. I feel lighter somehow. I'm not holding onto this secret alone and maybe I won't feel so sick when I'm forced to look Tony Stark in the eye. I know there's plenty who would argue that he has the right to know the truth, but does he? Would it even matter? He missed my birth, first steps, first word, my first day of school, prom, graduation, and everything else. So what would there really be left? I have a father… a really great father. He has Pepper. He has Iron Man. He has a business to run. He has so much on his plate and I won't throw that at him too. Or maybe I'm just terrified that it'll be two parents rejecting me? John and Helen wanted me, but somehow it makes me sad to think my own flesh and blood didn't. I wonder if Loki feels the same way. I don't ask though. "I should go."

"I should rest."

I pick up his food tray and leave feeling better and worse at the same time. I don't know how that's possible.

My birth father is stalking me apparently. It's the only explanation for why he's in my office texting someone on his cell as if he belongs here. "Ummm… hello?"

He immediately turns to look at me and jumps out of the chair. "Darcy, right?"

I want to roll my eyes at the fact that even now he still has to ask. I want to scream it from the rooftops. 'Dude, I AM YOUR FUCKING DAUGHTER! REMEMBER MY NAME!' Instead I just fold my arms and stare at him. "Tony, right?"

He smiles at that, putting away his phone and shoving his hands in his pockets. "I just got back from a meeting with Nick Fury and the two 'pain in my ass-assians' and I thought I'd stop by. You know I didn't realize you were looking after Loki, but Thor says you've been taking care of him for a while now."

"Yup."

He's staring at me as if he's expecting me to say more, but I don't feel like talking. It's been a long day and he's the last person I want to be talking to right now. "Right… well, here's the thing… Thor's a good guy and all but you should probably be careful with Loki. He may not have his powers, but he's still dangerous. Thor isn't exactly a good judge of character when it comes to these things. I was… concerned for your welfare."

I find that hard to believe. "That's pretty touching considering you barely ever remember my name." It's not like I'm not the only one sharing a lot of my time with Loki. I'm not sure why he wants to discourage me from being around the man.

He flashes a grin at that. "He talks about you."

Ah, so the whole forgetting my name was bullshit apparently? It figures. "I'm flattered." I move to get to my desk, but Tony's stepped in my way.

"Darcy, why do I feel like I've pissed you off for some reason? Help me out here. Give me a clue at least. I can be a bit of a jackass to everyone so it's hard to keep track of who I've pissed off and why. Did I… do something? Say something?"

I don't really know what to say. I can't help staring at his eyes, because they're my eyes. I look like him, and it makes my stomach twist into knots. He doesn't deserve to be treated badly because of a one night stand, but this whole situation is so completely screwed up. I'm in way over my head. I don't need his money. I don't even need a father. The thing is… I don't want to get close. I want things the way they were when he couldn't remember my name and I just barely spoke to him. The thing is, when I look at Tony I feel like I'm cheating on the man who raised me. Deep down all those annoying insecurities I thought I'd dealt with come back with a vengeance. Would he have wanted me? Would he have let my mother put me up for adoption? If I told him… would he even care? It shouldn't matter what he thinks. It does though. "I was just gonna clock out and grab a drink… wanna come?"

Stark frowned, confused. "I have a girlfriend you know."

"Gross dude, not even interested in you like that." My birth father thought I was hitting on him. I'm seconds away from being a Jerry Springer episode.

"Uhhh thanks?"

I'm not ready to tell him the truth just yet, but would it be wrong to at least spend some time with my father? John Lewis couldn't fault me for it. He'd probably be proud of his baby girl for facing her issues like this. "I'm thirsty. If you want to come, feel free. I seriously need a drink."

Stark nods. "I'll pay for the first round."

"Excellent."

He's not so bad after you get a couple drinks in him. I mostly make up stuff about finding Loki 'intriguing.' I've always had a thing for bad boys, but reformed ex-villians with interests in world domination seem just a little too hardcore… even for me. The man killed people for crying out loud! I definitely have an issue with dating murderers. Loki and me? It could never work… it would be such a bad idea. I refuse to even go there. This is me… not going there. "I've been taking care of him since I got back. He's just… not what I expected."

Stark finishes his scotch and glances over at me. "He's a big old bag of crazy… but I get it. Some would say he has a few redeeming qualities."

I think about earlier when I told him my parentage. I think about how he seemed to understand my need to tell someone so the burden wasn't all on me. He could probably use this information against me, but he hasn't. He seemed to get it. He seemed to get me. I'm not really used to that. Jane loves me, but I know I drive her crazy. I'm not a scientist and I slow her down when she's in her zone. I have lots of friends back in New Mexico, but my job has swallowed my social life whole since Thor happened. "He kind of does. Did you know we were both adopted?" I didn't mean to say that.

Stark motions for the bartender to give him more scotch. "I didn't realize."

"He took it a little harder than I did, but I found out the truth when I was five so… I guess I'll give him some leeway."

Tony laughs at that. "If it makes you feel any better I knew exactly who my father was and I still had 'daddy issues' to deal with."

"I never really did. I loved my parents. They were supportive, funny, and my mom couldn't cook to save her life. I was lucky." I'm staring at him. I imagine myself being raised by Tony. I think about everything he's ever done or been through and I wonder if I would have been one of those spoiled starlets that goes out and gets drunk and basically shames myself in every way. "Tony?"

"Yeah?"

"What would you do… if you found out tomorrow you had a kid?"

Stark laughed at that. "I would put my name in for 'Worst Father of the Year' and try to find a way to tell Pepper without her murdering me over it, I suppose. Thankfully, I never had to deal with that. I was always very careful."

Oh the irony of that statement! "I'd totally vote for you."

"What?"

"For 'Worst Father of the Year'… I'd vote for you. I believe in being supportive."

Tony Stark is grinning from ear to ear and I basically just called him the worst father ever. I will never understand this man. I kind of like that about him. "In that case… would you also help me tell Pepper?"

I down the rest of my own drink and laugh. "You are SO on your own with that one!"

Could this be considered our first father/daughter moment? Drinking at some crappy bar? God I hope so. It seems fitting somehow. I watch him pay for our drinks and he helps me up, and calls me a taxi. He even pays in advance. "It was a pleasure drinking with you, Darcy Lewis."

I smile back and wave. That night I give dad a call and tell him how much I miss him. I don't know why I'm crying the moment I hear his voice. He tells me it's all going to be okay and I believe him. I always believe him.

To Be Continued