I Don't Hate You

Chapter 7: Call It A Thing

...She needed her naked. It wasn't like a normal sex-wish, it was a real need, like a life or death need. She needed to be naked with her now.

And she began looking for somewhere to be naked, and fast, but they were in a room with preemies at the neonatal ward. Which she had completely forgot too.

"Meredith," she managed to moan between the kisses "We need to go somewhere."

"Like where?" Meredith asked, her hands moving across her hips, seeming to want to peruse every inch of her anatomy.

"Babies. Not around babies," Addison said, lifting her gaze around the ceiling, feeling lightheaded.

"Okay...On-call room," Meredith said succinctly, not seeming to be able to or simply not bothering to use complete phrases.

"Okay," Addison agreed, pulling Meredith to her closer for a last kiss before they'd had to part for about two minutes or something. It felt like longer. She slipped her tongue inside her mouth and Meredith moaned again, her knees bending under her. Their breath, their tongues, even their heart beats seemed to intertwine.

It was time to stop before they'd do things on the floor in a baby-room.

They found each others hands, clasped them together and did some kind of strange pushing against each other, keeping their lips locked together. They broke the kiss, looking at each other, panting, their eyes glassy, their cheeks blushing and with hair on end.

They continued to stare at each other, until Meredith snapped out of it and began to flatten down Addison's hair. Addison did the same for Meredith.

"Okay?"

"Okay."

The corridor had never seemed so long. It felt as if everyone was staring at them, as if everyone, every nurse and every doctor could see what they just did and what intentions they have. They just had to see the electricity, no, nuclear radiation that was going on between them.

They were drawn together and couldn't walk normally ever again. Crippled. Their hands sometimes bumped into each other as if they had their own will, they wanted to touch as much as the rest of their bodies wanted to.

The on-call door could as much have been the gates to heaven. It shone at them like the goal for the marathon runner. Their barely two-minute walk had been longer and taken more energy than what a real marathon would.

Addison pushed the door open.

"Thank god, it's empty," she breathed and Meredith glanced across her shoulder before she slipped in through the door to, closing it quickly and locking it.

Addison let her arm slide around Meredith's waist, the other one cupped her breast and lips found lips. She nibbled on her ear, moving her lips to her neck, kissing her way to the small hollow between her collar bones. Meredith moaned by the tender, yet held backed treatment.

Addison felt Meredith's hands grab her arms tightly, and pushed her onto the bed, letting out a mischievous laugh. Addison watched her as she swiftly pulled off her scrub shirt and the green shirt she wore under it.

"Just come here you," Addison said as she thought Meredith was beginning to take too much time for getting down on the bed.

As she came closer Addison grabbed her by her waist and swooped her close to her. Chest against chest, their noses rubbed against each other, their legs immediately intertwining and their lips met to let tongues touch. Breathing heavily, gasping into each other's mouths, suddenly very hurried to rip off their clothes, and they didn't hold back anything anymore.

Addison straddled Meredith, both of them were completely naked, she bent down to the other woman, kissing her way from her neck, to the valley of her breasts, following the small line which went down to her belly button. Stopping. Putting her hand just below her belly, Meredith's hips bucked. She was eager.

"Don't stop," Meredith told her urgently.

Addison looked at her teasingly. "Are you sure you don't want to talk instead?"

"Screw the talking!" Meredith growled as a response, which made Addison chuckle, before beginning to place kisses around her hips, creating a trail of kisses to her thighs, her inner thighs, making her way closer and closer to the parts she knew Meredith wished the most for her to kiss.

Meredith groaned. "Stop being so mean," she said. "I'm starting to get why they call you Satan."

Addison chuckled and then said innocently "I thought you didn't want to talk?" at the same time as she let her fingers graze her lips, causing Meredith to make an completely incoherent answer, and then sunk into them.

She was really wet, Addison noticed with content and some surprise, and confused herself with feeling that way, since she was a vagina doctor after all. She should know all about vaginas.

This thought fell out of her mind immediately as Meredith pushed herself against her fingers, a silent begging for more. She moved her fingers from her clit, reached out to touch her breast with her free hand and then let two fingers enter Meredith.

She found her G-spot, which she noticed mostly because Meredith squealed a bit too loudly, putting her fist inside her mouth, seeming to bite on her knuckles.

Addison kissed, licked and sucked on Meredith's thighs as she caressed her on the same time, teasing her just a little bit more, until she kissed the part where Meredith's whole being wanted her to kiss.

She licked and sucked on her clit, completely improvising since she never done this before, but she followed the responses Meredith gave, and found quickly a rhythm, making the younger woman's hips buck almost violently. She went back up to kiss her lips, making her taste herself. Meredith's fingers found Addison's opening too, and they touched each other, while keeping the other one's gaze, fascinated by how the other responded. Their legs locked together and without noticing they began taking synchronized, ragged breaths.

Just as Addison was about to reach her climax, she couldn't help but moan loudly, Meredith suddenly pushed her onto her back and let both of her hands graze her anatomy, leaving a wet trail from one of her hands. Then she silently parted her legs, looking at her with darkened eyes.

Instead of playing a game of tease she went straight to the point, and Addison was grateful she did. She involuntarily let out a "oh god!" and grabbed Meredith's hair as she licked her, making swiveling circles that made Addison's complete world spin, not anymore entirely sure what was up or down anymore, if there was any gravity at all.

Then Meredith added fingers into the picture – the number of them or even if there was more than one, she had no idea – and found her G-spot at the same time as she sucked on her clit. This was far too much for Addison than she could handle, reason with or even try to keep her feet on the ground. She screamed, her body convulsing with every wave of her orgasm.

When she came back to earth she realized she almost had suffocated Meredith by involuntarily squeezing her legs together, but she just smiled, let Addison breath for a moment and realize that gravity still existed on planet earth before it was Meredith's turn to reach her skies.

Afterward, Addison was unsure if she'd dare to snuggle her a bit, but then Meredith answered her silent wondering by pulling her arms around her into some spooning. It felt very good.

They stayed like that for a moment until Meredith spoke.

"What did we just do?"

Addison turned around so they could face each other, putting their foreheads together and linking their legs.

"I think you know," she whispered and took her hands in hers, stroking her palm with her thumb. "Will you be ignoring me in elevators?"

"No," Meredith smiled. "Will you be ignoring me in elevators?"

"Not if you don't want me to."

"I don't want us to ignore each other. But... This is just so strange, how did this happen? Seriously?" Meredith rambled.

"I think you know how," Addison answered, let go of her hands to be able to make some trails on her body with her fingertips.

Meredith rolled her eyes and then shivered by the touch. "I know that you are gorgeous on so many different levels. Some of them newly discovered... But what I don't understand is how someone like you can like someone like me," she finished a bit insecurely.

"Aw, how cute," Addison said and dotted her nose against hers.

"Not funny. I'm serious, Addie. I usually screw boys on tequila. Boys that have stupid boy-penises. Or stupid boys with stupid boy-penises. Not... you."

"There's a first time for everything."

"Stop being so laid back about it. You should be freaking out."

"Hey, you can't blame me, I've just had the best orgasm of my life," she said and it was true, she was in a heavenly bliss in a perfect world.

"It was surprising, how amazing it was. To be with a woman I mean. Or maybe it was just because it was you."

"Do you always talk this much?" Addison teased.

"Shut up."

Addison kissed her.

"Do you want this to be just one time or...?" Meredith breathed.

Addison answered just by smiling and rolled on top of her.

~GA~

The following days they met again and again in on-call rooms and one time even in a supply closet.

Derek continued to be bright and shiny, or whatever he was calling it, or at least he didn't crack down as if Meredith had broken up with him. When she worked with Meredith, or had sex with Meredith, they never mentioned him. It felt better that way and neither of them were ready to deal with it yet.

However Addison was beginning to question what they were doing, and where they were going with their... thing. Could she even call it a thing?

She had never seen this sex-crazed side of Meredith before. Derek sure as hell wasn't a sex-crazed kind of person... She knew from her own experience... At least not like Mark or Meredith, or herself. She shuddered when she thought of Derek touching Meredith.

She hadn't broken up with him, so they were probably having sex. Most likely. Why wouldn't they? She didn't have anything to hold her back.

"What are you thinking about?" Derek suddenly asked her.

Addison flinched out of her thoughts, realizing she's been staring at him instead of the scans of a young woman who had been involved in a car accident. Always car accidents...

It was raining outside. She thought she remembered a French poem that went something like, my heart cries like it rains in the city. She sighed for herself, maybe she was becoming like Seattle. She used to be a New Yorker, now she was moody, confused and probably becoming a lesbian.

"Addison?"

"Yes?"

"You're acting very strange."

"I'm sorry," she said, tearing herself away from the window, putting her reading glasses back on and read the chart for probably the fiftieth time.

"You should be happy," he said, looking at her, smiling, with his hand leisurely on his hip. "We're civilized. Meredith and I are happy. We all are friends. You know, Meredith actually called you Addie the other day."

"Oh, she did," Addison said nervously.

"It's a positive thing. She can talk about you as your friends do," Derek said, as if he she didn't react to his statement the way he thought she should have.

"Yes, yes," she mumbled, wishing he'd shut up. Wishing she wouldn't feel so down.

Where was Meredith anyway?

"Have you seen her today, by the way?" she asked him, adding the by the way to make the question more casual.

"Yes, in my bed," he shone, creating a picture of too much information in her head.

"Derek," she sighed, frowning.

"Okay, sorry. Friends do share you know."

"Do you want me to tell you about my sex life?" she asked meaningfully.

Now it was Derek's time to frown, probably thinking about Mark.

"No," he said curtly. "And to answer your question, she's off work today."

"Why?"

"Sometimes, people don't work," he rolled his eyes. "She's been doing night shifts."

Yeah, Addison had too.

Derek hadn't.

~GA~

Addison had four hours until she needed to be back at work. She had sent a text to Meredith, which she hadn't answered, so she thought she could just drop by at her house.

Her heart was beating very fast when she walked up to the door. The door seemed huge, even though it was a perfectly normal door. The brownstone door had been much bigger, if she were to talk about doors, but she knew her brain was only thinking about doors because of what this particular one hid inside of it. It made her nervous.

She knocked on the door. She usually did that instead of ringing the doorbell. Doorbells tend to shriek.

It was the nervousness talking; that she knew.

Cristina opened the door. Looking at her with surprised eyes.

"Dr. Montgomery!" she stuttered. "What are you doing here?"

"I just came here to see Meredith."

"Now is not a good time," Cristina confided. "I'm trying to make her go to work, but she just won't go and she won't even tell me what's wrong and I'm her person you know? As her person you'd think she'd be able to tell me what's going on but she just won't."

Addison didn't move as she babbled on.

"I'm giving you too much information," she sighed. "You, great that you came, for whatever reason you came," she added in a frown. "I have to go back to the hospital, so just go in there and handle the situation for me, 'kay?"

"Okay," Addison said.

"Great. Awesome. See you!" she said and half ran out to her car.

Addison walked hesitantly inside the house of Ellis Grey. She closed the door quietly, hung off her jacket, put down her bag and went looking for Meredith.

"Mer?" she called. "What's going on?"

Meredith came down from the stairs. She was wearing the lilac sweater she didn't know Addison had a thing for.

"What are you doing here?" she asked breathlessly, hurrying down to her.

"You didn't get my text? I thought we could go do something, since it's your day off," Addison said as Meredith put her arms behind her neck and then kissed her softly.

"I've missed you," she mumbled.

"Why is Cristina trying to make you go to work on your day off?"

"She just doesn't think it's healthy for me to not be working."

"Why is that?" Addison said, trying not to be distracted by the way Meredith was pushing her body against hers.

Meredith sighed and pulled away from her, sitting down on the end of the stairs with a huff.

"You remember when I had appendicitis?"

"Uhm, yeah?" Addison said, remaining on her feet.

"I," she started but ended up with a small laugh. "I actually thought the Derek and Finn situation was making me sick."

Addison hesitated. "And so?"

"And I can't help comparing that to this."

"Is... this... making you sick?"

"No! This is different. But I couldn't decide then, because they were both equally not-enough for me."

Addison's heart began to race.

"So, Addison," Meredith said, standing up, walking slowly toward her again. Looking annoyingly cute. "Do you want to go out with me? On a date?"

"A date?" Addison breathed.

"Yeah, cause I'd like to try out how this thing can develop," she said alluringly.

"So it's a thing?" she breathed.

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?" Meredith said, as if she hadn't even considered the thing not being a thing.

Addison didn't feel convinced.

"Are you going to try to choose between me and Derek? Is that what this is about? Because if it is, I don't know if I can be in."

"No, Addie. I'm not going to choose, because I'm trying to tell you I've already made my choice."

"You... you what? You're going to tell Derek? About us?"

"You think it's a bad idea?" Meredith asked, suddenly a bit self-conscious.

"Uhm, yeah, I do actually. Mer, come on, we've had sex five times. It's barely been two weeks. We shouldn't get ahead of ourselves..."

"You don't want to?" Meredith asked quietly, creating a bigger distance between them.

Addison took her hands in hers.

"I want to, I really do. I want you, and I didn't think I'd be able to say that at all," she said and let out a laugh. "But, I don't think we should tell Derek."

Meredith frowned. "Why?"

"Because we both know that we both know Derek. A thing like this would break him."

"Yeah, he'd freak out," she said and smiled smugly.

"Don't be mean to him, he's a sensitive little thing," she laughed, feeling very patronizing.

"So, we'll try this, you and me, but we won't tell Derek until we're absolutely sure."

"Yes."

"So he'll never have to know if it doesn't work out," Meredith said, her voice becoming slier as she walked toward her, flipping her hair back to expose her neck, as she had learned Addison had a soft spot for.

"Yep," Addison breathed as Meredith put her arms around her neck. She let her arms slide around her waist.

They kissed. First soft but then they began to deepen the kiss.

"So what do you think our odds are, with this thing, that we have?" Meredith asked her.

"What do you think?" she asked as she began tugging on the lilac sweater.