I literally have no idea how to continue :p You've put a lot of pressure on me with all your amazingly kind reviews, I blame themaidsdiaries entirely :p love you really though.

Dedicated to MakeYorkshireTeaNotWar – I love you very much and I'm sorry I don't believe you when you say my writing is good, I don't know how you put up with me xXx

They sat on the floor tightly bound together as if nothing else existed and nothing could separate them. She belonged in his arms; no one had ever felt this perfect to him before, she was devastated and would never normally let anyone get this close to her but it was perfect, she was perfect and so close now, it wouldn't take much to lean down and kiss her but she wasn't facing him, the realisation that she wasn't his – she leant on him but faced away, there but not his.

He still revelled at the fact she'd kissed his hands, it may have only been his hands but to feel her lips on his skin sent his mind spinning off to a world where propriety didn't matte, where they could just be Charles and Elsie with anyone frowning down upon them. But of course, this was just her needin comfort, not a declaration of her love. He wanted to ask her, know how she felt about him, but of course he couldn't ask, her mind was swimming with despair and sadness for her family and panic for her niece. This would hardly be an appropriate time to ask her if she'd ever felt anything more than friendship for him as he had for her, it wasn't right, in so many ways, he couldn't very well confess his feelings for the housekeeper as he was sure she didn't return them, things would then be torturously awkward and she'd be left alone, no one to comfort her, no one to hold her as she cried, she could become ill and he never wanted to lose her. So for now he would just hold her tight, so she knew she was protected and always would be by him.

She'd laid their conjoined hands on her heart; he couldn't help but notice she held on tighter than she had been previously, almost as if she was scared he would leave her, like she needed him there. But of course, she needed him there for comfort, not for anything else, she would revert back to being friends when she'd calmed down and they'd likely never end up like this again.
He sighed but misjudged how tightly she was held against him. She lolled her head back to rest against his shoulder, surprising him as he was suddenly engulfed in the lavender scent of her hair again.

"I'm sorry" she said softly, the gentle nature of her voice caressing his mind into insanity as he revelled in her accent.

"Don't be" he whispered, moving his head down, away from the urge to nuzzle her soft hair with his nose. She wasn't so easily convinced, she turned her head to face him hoping holding his gaze would make him admit his troubles but she found his face much closer than she'd imagined, their noses mere millimetres away from each other.

He'd been surprised enough she'd spoken let alone that she'd turned to face him, he'd wanted to move back as to not scare her but as soon as she turned, he wanted to stay, he wanted to be this close to her but he could see the stains on her cheeks, her eyes red raw from so much crying, her breathing shaky – she wasn't back to her usual state, he couldn't take advantage of her. He desperately tried to push that to the front of his mind, he mustn't take advantage of her, he could call it love all he wanted, but she tempted him far too much and eight years of longing had only heightened his desire for her. Now, with her so close, he couldn't be sure he could stop himself, especially as she wouldn't be putting up a fight.
He could feel her breath on his lips, he could feel every tiny movement of her body, she was so close to him, every part of her rested on part of him, they were merged into one another the way he'd always dreamed but it wasn't proper, she wasn't there through love, she simply needed comfort, he couldn't overstep the boundary any more than he already had, he couldn't do it to her, it'd only hurt her and their friendship and those were two things he couldn't stand to see hurt.
Her hair was tickling his forehead, she was already too close for him to even notice if she leaned even further to him. Her scent was intoxicating, he should have moved away but she held him there, everything about her just held him where he was; freezing him in the moment with the woman he so adored moving slowly closer to him.

He couldn't, he mustn't take advantage of her and he mustn't let her take over his mind like this, she wasn't thinking properly, all he was to her was a source of comfort, she clung to him because she needed the contact not because she needed his love. He closed his eyes needing to concentrate on anything else, he just couldn't take advantage of his best friend and most trusted colleague… And there it was, Mr Carson was returning, he'd been Charles for a short time but the Butler was returning now, the man who frowned on relationships between staff, the man who'd always put work before love and was now paying for his mistake. He valued his job and knew she did too, so for that matter he needed to stay Mr Carson and leave Charles ever further behind him in the past. He needed to stay a friend and stop loving her, for both their sakes, there was no use if she didn't return his feelings, it would only hurt him and the need he felt for her as she sat so close meant it would only hurt her. He couldn't hurt her; he had to stop this silly nonsense he frowned upon;

So when her lips gently grazed his, he knew pulling away instantly was the right thing.

Yeah I'm in a mood for making you all wait a little longer for any sort of resolvement between them :p

Busy busy at the moment, but I might be persuaded to update quickly if I receive some of your loving reviews :p