There was something deeply hurtful about the way she had said that, and Jacob couldn't tear himself away from the hope he dared to feel every single time she said she loved him. Even though he knew her well enough to realise she meant as a friend, there was part of him that always hoped that this time it'd be more- that this time she would mean it.
Dragging himself away from Bella, who had fallen asleep as soon as her head touched the pillow, he clambered onto the worn sofa and lay on his back, with his hands behind his head. Jacob's mind was whirring, so that even though he was staring at a stained ceiling he was seeing Bella dancing through his memories. It felt as though all of his memories, every moment of significance in his life, was bound up with Bella. Everything that meant anything to him was tied to Bella Swann, soon to be Cullen.
Jacob allowed himself a smile. Well. If she got over her pre-nerve jitters she'd become Mrs. Edward Cullen. If, however, she listened to that tiny niggling voice in her mind, that told her he was wrong for her; that told her she wasn't meant to be a bloodsucking leech, then she wouldn't marry him. She'd realise that she was meant for Jacob- that he was hers, and always had been.
He pressed his fingertips against his eyelids, willing sleep to come, watching as a bright colours danced in the darkness. His breathing rang out heavily in the darkness. He thought of his sister, Tala, before she had left with their mother when Jacob was 11. She had been 17 then, and had seen what was blossoming between Jacob and Bella, but Tala had also seen that it meant perhaps more to her brother than it did to Bella.
"If when you're older you know for sure she's what you want, don't let anyone tell you you can't have her Jake. You're too young to understand totally, but one day you'll thank for me this," Tala had grinned, ruffling his unruly black hair. Jacob had opened his mouth to reply, but Tala grabbed her bag and ran out of the door, leaving Jacob alone with Billy, and that's how it'd been ever since.
As a flash of lightening lit up the room, Jacob stood up and steeled himself. He was going to get Bella. He owed it to Tala. More than that, he owed it to Charlie. Charlie didn't deserve to see his only daughter turned into a vicious monster.
He walked quickly to his bedroom, and paused leaning against the doorframe. Bella was curled up, her hand bound in her hair which was spread across his pillow. She was beautiful in a tragic way, Jacob thought. Her face, normally flush cheeked, was pale and her eyes were dark from lack of sleep, and red rimmed from crying in bed every night.
Jacob hated the bloodsucker more with each breath Bella took, as he saw what it had cost. Saw exactly what it had done to his beautiful Bella. And she was his. Whatever claim Edward had on her was null and void.
Without thinking about it, Jacob crossed the small room in a single stride and lay next to Bella. He aligned his face with hers, so that their lips were close and she'd have to breathe his air, as he breathed hers. Jacob didn't want to close his eyes, even for a second. He didn't know how long he had before Bella woke up and told him to leave her along.
After what felt like forever, Jacob shifted his weight slightly on the better. This movement was enough to jolt Bella from her sleep.
Jacob froze. The next move had to be Bella's, however much he wanted to guarantee that she realised she was meant to be his.
Bella turned her head slightly to one side, stifling a yawn as she studied her best friend. His eyes never left hers. Slowly at first, as though she was scared of her own feelings, Bella raised a hand but as it got closer to Jacob's face she sped up until she held his soft cheek against her palm. That was all the go ahead Jacob needed.
Resisting the urge to laugh and cheer, Jacob finally did what he'd been longing to do since she'd arrived on his doorstep. Softly, he pressed his warm lips against hers, and was delighted when he felt her lips moving with his.