A/N: Okay, so I think what I'll do is after every episode, I'll have House's reflections on the events that happened in the episode, as far as his relationship with Wilson goes. So chapter one was on "Black Hole," and I'm skipping "Lockdown" because nothing really happened between them there.

"Knight Fall"

He's testing me. He told me not to interfere, all that shit about wanting to handle this on his own. It's a test. He wants me to interfere. He wouldn't date her because he really wants to get back together. How could he? He's only doing it to see how I react. He wants me, he knows I want him. Maybe he thinks I'll cave, make a move on him or something. Maybe he thinks I won't be able to stand watching them together, and I'll just swallow my pride and kiss him or something right in front of her.

Well he's wrong. I'm not gonna do that.

Maybe he just wants me to do exactly the opposite of what he asked. Why'd he say that, anyway? I can look out for myself, I need to look out for myself. Well, Jimmy, you're headed for failure. Unless I do something about it. I'm not gonna catch you when you fall, I'm gonna make sure you don't.

He can't seriously be expecting anything from this relationship. She broke him. Why would he give her a second chance after what she did?

You gave him a second chance. He left.

That was different. He came back. And he only left because he loved me. He was afraid to lose me. That's forgivable. That's not like what she did.

How can he forgive her for that?

He did cheat on her.

He obviously had a good reason.

He's not perfect.

I love him anyway.

But she doesn't. What does she want with him? Does she just want to reinforce her point by luring him back in and then hurting him all over again?

He can't seriously be that stupid.

It must be a first love thing. Well not first love, first wife. How can he still have any sort of feelings for her after what she did? It was such a long time ago, he's probably nostalgic about the past.

Or he's just lonely.

Why go to her and not to me? Can he seriously not know, after all this time? Maybe he's unsure. Maybe he's waiting for me to make the move.

And in the meantime, he'll just go back to the woman who broke his heart twenty years ago? It must be nostalgia. It must be a crush.

But if it's a crush, it could turn into something more. He can't fall in love with her, he can't. Of course I'll outlast her, of course he'll always love me more, but if he falls in love and she breaks him, I'll have to pick up the pieces. Can I go through that again? It was what brought us close, last time. I guess you could call it good timing, meeting right around his divorce. It could bring us closer again this time. But is that worth him getting hurt?

That's not even a question.

So then the question becomes, how do I keep him from falling in love?

If I try to pull them apart, they'll just push closer together, like teenagers whose parents are idiotic enough to prohibit them from seeing each other. So I have to pretend to be supportive.

But what about when he finds out? When he finds out I'm the reason they break up, he'll hate me. Well, he won't hate me, he can never hate me, he loves me too much. But he'll be pissed off. He might get back together with her. He might leave. He won't care why I did it.

I'm seeing a dilemma here.

But I'm not trying to keep him from seeing her. Hell, I'd hit that if she wasn't the one inside it. I'm just trying to keep him from falling in love with her. Of course, the easiest way to prevent him falling in love with her would be for him to fall in love with me instead.

I could wait until he gets home from work and start making out with him as he walks through the door.

Or at work. When he comes into my office to get me for lunch, I could just walk up to him and start kissing him.

I could do it while the bitch is here. Follow him to the bathroom. She'll wonder what's taking him so long. Or wait for her to go to the bathroom, and come back to find us making out on the couch.

Why won't I do that?

What am I scared of?

Not rejection. I know he wants me.

Breaking up?

Could our friendship survive a breakup? Could we survive a breakup?

He only got through his divorces because of me. I wouldn't admit it to his face, but I only got through my breakup because of him.

I can't date him. It's too dangerous. Something will happen. I'll hurt him.

Fuck.

Letting the bitch near him is dangerous, because she'll hurt him. But me...nothing she does to him can hurt as much as what I could do to him. It would hurt more, coming from me, than anyone else.

It's so easy to say that we'll just never break up, we'll grow old together and die in each other's arms.

That's probably exactly what he was thinking about Sam when he proposed to her. And Bonnie and Julie. And Amber...

He's an oncologist who surrounds himself with people who hurt him, the one girl he would have made it with dies, and he can never be with the person he loves most because if that gets screwed up, he loses everything.

Clearly this man wasn't meant to be happy.